rickermortes

I’d previously posted saying that I would work on games again.

And I will.

But that time isn’t now.

The last few years have been incredible. Marriage, a house, land, great-paying job. I couldn’t ask for much more.

Except to live the dream that I’ve always wanted.

And I will.

This blog is effectively done as of today. It has served its duty and journaled a portion of my life that no longer exists. Jesse, the single guy living in a studio apartment with his cat and no job, is gone. Jesse, the married guy with a house and 40 acres and a job that demands attention, is here.

I’m very quiet about sensitive aspects of my life. I don’t talk a lot about my big problems or serious concerns, as I tend to keep them to myself and those close to me. My faith is one of those quieter portions of my life. While my behaviors can run afoul at times (often), I trend Baptist in many of my beliefs and have a  faith in the Christian God.

I’m not one to speak much on this topic, but I’m absolutely certain that none of this that has happened or will happen will have been in vain.

I believe that I’ve been set on a course to do the exact things I’ve always wanted to do, but it’s taken some time and some struggle to get there.

My job is going to teach me the finer points of management and leadership. As I’ve been in management roles, I’ve learned a couple of things already. For one, management is a skill. Leadership is a skill. They’re two separate things, and they’re not the same thing as expertise. Those are what I would call the Leadership Excellence Triad, if I were to try to sell you something on it.

My home will get us into the country, where I’ve always been more comfortable and found more inspiration. The city thing isn’t for me.

My hobbies will allow for creative outlets that will take the place of games/stories while I’m working on the other things I need to finish. I’ve some wood-working projects, garden projects, house projects, property projects and software projects that will all help me develop planning/implementation/completion skills that I’ll use one day with games/stories.

Life is too short to spend it pining for what we haven’t got, and life is too short to give up hope for those things we’ve always longed for.

I’m going to live my life. And should God desire me back on this path, He’ll put me there. Until then, I’m going to charge ahead with what I’ve got and what I know.

It’s been a while and I’m back. Using Unity and looking for a team.

The last few years have been interesting; running up the corporate ladder in healthcare, learning to make soap, buying land, buying a home, etc.

Acquisition means nothing, appreciation means everything.

Coding is a habit. Habits are built.

I’m writing at least one line a day to get myself back into the habit. I’ve been tinkering with graphical stuff for Fowl Ball’s main title. Most of it is just me learning to work with Swift, but it may be worth keeping.

It’s been a while, right? 

I forget what I last mentioned. Bought a house. Started a new job that isn’t working me to death.

Been tinkering with Swift. Deciding between Apple-based projects or using Game Maker for my tinkering. I like the idea of learning a programming language, so I believe an Apple-centric future may be ahead for me. But. Who knows.

I'd mentioned before that I was beginning work on the next game.

It progresses. Slowly. Adulthood is a bitch. I've been working ... roughly 60 hours a week. I don't get as much time to work on the game, but I guess what time I do get, I enjoy.

It's also been a real blessing to work with Greg again. I get the feeling that we've both grown as people and developers since we last took a stab at this sort of thing (over ten years ago? shit).

The Next Game. At first, it was really an homage to Earthbound. But now, it's turned into a dedication to all of the RPGs that really inspired me. Final Fantasy 6, Chrono Trigger, Mario RPG, Zelda: ALTTP, and Earthbound. 

Sorry, folks. I was a poor Nintendo kid. The Genesis RPGs mean nothing to me. And ... Lufia was good. But didn't really hit me. FFVI had the opera and the post-apocalyptic world. Chrono Trigger had an immense amount of secrets, stellar writing and, of course, time travel. Mario RPG had humor and action. Zelda had the best puzzles; hell, I hate even calling them puzzles. It was a fuggin' adventure and you found your way through it. 

And Earthbound? I want to make games because of Earthbound.

So. No Genny RPGs for me. Or PC.

Though, I did play a fair amount of Final Lap Twin on the TG16. Effin' rad. Even today, I see it as a real step ahead of most other RPGs. The driving battle mechanic is a super idea.

So, new game. I'm really excited. More than I have been in a long time. 

Also  little scared. This is the biggest undertaking I've started in years. Not since I started working on Asparagus in ... 2005/2006. Never finished that one, either.

New Game has a name, but I want to wait to disclose that at a point where I feel we can actually show it off. Lord knows I've talked too early too many times.

New Game is being worked on in earnest by Greg and myself. Greg's my friend who got me into game development. When we were kids, we wrote each other letters (because, we're fairly certain, we killed the Juno free e-mail service). We were both gamers and into tech, so Greg said we should do this sort of stuff when we grew up. There's a longer story. But. That's for the kids at bedtime.

New Game is an RPG ... of sorts. Most of the inspiration to work on New Game comes from Earhbound, Chrono Trigger and Final Fantasy VI. However, as we've aged, we realize that we haven't got some for slogging out battles the way we used to. Hell, Greg didn't even really play a lot of RPGs. Maybe Phantasy Star, as he was a Sega kid.

Point being: we're working on ways to include battles but keep them enjoyable and quick. I played Final Fantasy XIII and wanted to hurt myself. I don't have time for the battles anymore. It isn't ADD or anything else: it's cold, hard adulthood that has me working full-time, married and trying to maintain friendships/relationships. 

So, this is one of the big goals for us, is designing a battling system that allows for character expansion/progression but doesn't carry a heavy burden of time.

Earthbound and Chrono Trigger are probably my favorite classic systems, and Earthbound is really just Dragon Quest. They're both pretty quick, but I think we're going to go with something further away.

One of the major issues I have with RPGs is that every one of them has to develop their battle system according to it actually being a "battle." Conflict exists in many areas of life, so I want to involve this instead of necessarily fighting people.

Largely, New Game is about adulthood. It's about finding out that things aren't going to be as easy or great as you thought they'd be. It's not saying everything sucks, but it's saying that you're most likely going to be the guy making swords for the hero instead of being the hero.

New Game is set in the future. I've been working on tweaking the old story and applying some new features, and it's really helped. Greg and I have different viewpoints on things; we like different genres. Working with someone with a different outlook on games has actually made the story stronger and the rough game outline more palatable.

Imagine that.

How is everyone? I hope the holidays and new year have been pleasant. I hope Christmas was spent with those you love.

It's been quiet on my front. But for a good reason. My last post mentioned working on games, and I've been busy pulling together people to work on a big, super awesome project. By awesome, I mean it's been a dream project of mine since ... 2002, I believe. It's been something I've been thinking about for a while.

Initially, the game will arrive on Mac OS, Windows and Linux. Followed by tablet releases on Android and iOS. Followed, hopefully, by console releases.

The game? It's a 2D RPG/adventure similar to the SNES RPGs of yesteryear. Let's just say, Earthbound grows up and becomes bitter with age.

I played through Gone Home this weekend. My general feeling on the title is: "I'm happy I bought it, but I'm happier I bought it on sale."

 This isn't to say it wasn't a worthwhile playthrough, because it was. I enjoyed the atmosphere, music and easy puzzles. Hell, it really was a great relaxation title. If you want to play a game to unwind, play Gone Home.

No, what I mean by "happier I bought it on sale" is that the game is so short and doesn't blow me away in that amount of time. I completed it in less than an hour, which is fine: I'm all for short games. I'm an adult. I work 50+ hours per week. I really want to complete something without devoting all my time to it. So, I enjoy that facet of Gone Home.

What loses it for me a bit is this: whenever I play a short game, I'm reminded of Rez. I paid $50 for the game and didn't regret it a moment, because the opening level blew me away. I'd never experienced anything of the sort. To this day, it's on my list of games that have influenced me most.

Gone Home, while exceptionally unique, just didn't blow me away. And really, one could argue against me that Gone Home already costs less than Rez, and I'd give you that.

I'm only arguing that, for me, Gone Home was a fantastic experience that didn't blow me away and I'm happy I bought it when it was on sale on Steam.

It's been a while. I say that a lot.

So. What the F is going on?

A lot. For one, I got a new job. My first adult job. After I finished my degree, I went to my boss to ask how I could better myself. She said I should apply for a management job at the surgery center next door. I did. And I got the job. So, I'm the Materials & Support Manager at Ridges Surgery Center. As a bonus, the place is in startup phase, so I'm getting in on the opening of the center and able to impact a lot of the decisions that will be the basis of future operations. This also means I'm working nearly 60 hours or week. Or more. I lost count.

This new job has provide the ability for Kendra and I to buy the first new car we've ever owned. I traded in the Golden Beaut, the 2000 Ford Focus I've been driving forever, and got a 2014 Subaru Impreza. It's my dream car. Here's to another long relationship.

Kendra and I have been looking at houses, but nothing is definite yet. We're trying to get a good picture of how we want the future to look. It'll probably be in Minnesota. But. Where, I don't know yet.

We're very blessed at the moment.

GAMES. I haven't been doing jack shit, as I've been too busy planning the October wedding celebration, buying cars, getting new jobs and playing Diablo III on PS4. But, I have started working with a friend on some games for HTML5-based browsers. And, I've taken my old job working every other weekend overnights, so I'll finally have some time to work on games again.

I'm excited for that.

So, this weekend marks the first time I'll be able to devote some time to development in a while.

Woof.

Where the hell did all of these responsibilities come from? I don't remember taking all of them on. Particularly, at one time.

Crud.

I've been working with a friend on a game recently. We've both been busy, as he's had a kid and I've been getting married/moving her stuff/taking on projects at work/trying to maintain relationships with friends (and failing)/etc.

I have too many whimsies and too few hours.

Some notes:

- Shovel Knight is an asshole. I haven't been this pissed at a game since I was ten years old. I love it and so should you.

- The Minnesota state motto should be changed to "It's not the heat, it's the humidity."

- The Lady bought me Luigi's Mansion: Dark Moon for helping with the move, so I've added that to my list of games to complete. However, being a big fan of the previous game, I'm sure I'll burn through this. So far, I think it's unfortunate how "Western" of an influence can be seen in the game. While Nintendo SPD was involved, it was developed by Next Level Games in Canada; I'm having a difficult time with all of the slapstick humor (humour?) in the game.  I don't remember the original depending on ghosts pounding on each other; I remember the original being dependent upon a stellar atmosphere and little details. Am I wrong?

- I like Apple's new Swift language and will try to learn more about it when I get some GD time.

- I need sleep.

As a WWII buff, I'd ask that any of you who see this, stop for a moment and think about the boys lost in Normandy.

When 9/11 happened, I thought about going into the military. However, I  was 350 pounds (now 220) and I couldn't join. 

Busy busy busy. With what?

I DUN GOT MARRIED!

It has been a busy couple weeks, to say the least. Last update I posted I'd mentioned a life-changing event incoming. Well, that was it. Kendra and I eloped on May 24.

I GOT MARIO KART 8!

Best Mario Kart since the Nintendo 64 version, as far as I'm concerned. Kendra and I have been having a blast with it.

Pros: Fun track design, coins are relevant again, lots of characters, finally a way to kill the blue shell, awesome multi-player.

Cons: That cheating bastard CPU, god-awful loot when in first place, too many babies, too few SNES/N64 tracks.

Buy the damn thing. I'm rickermortes on the Nintendo Network. I don't know what else you have to do, but find me.

A BLAST FROM THE PAST!

Good things come in waves, it seems. Finished with school and getting married has joined up with an out-of-nowhere development: the band is getting back together to see if we can still make some pretty noises. As I am a (now married) 32 year old with a job and responsibilities, it's hard to devote a ton of time to any project. It would be perfect if I could find another 32 year old with a job and responsibilities. Well, it happened. My friend is taking technical reins and I'm holding the design. We're paring down projects. 

Holy shit, things change quickly.

YOSEMITE! IOS 8! SWIFT!

I've got all three in beta. As of now, iOS 8 is a buggy little bastard. I can't run Chrome and various other apps crash fairly frequently. But there are some nifty features in iOS 8. I haven't used the in-app messaging yet, but I really like immediate access to my recent/favorite contacts when I hit the home button twice (to bring up open apps).

Yosemite is pretty. I like what Apple is doing with OS X. Personally, I'm happy to see the merging of the design language in both OS X and iOS. It makes for a unified platform. I've not had any experience with anything really new in Yosemite. Much of it is design/under the hood from my experience so far. However, I like the new Xcode and Swift seems like a step in the right direction ... for Apple. If developers adopt Swift, they're effectively locked into the Apple ecosystem. I do like how it's starting to shape up, though. I'm going to spend some time tinkering with Swift and see what I think. I'd like to switch for my personal projects.

TOO MUCH GOING ON!

Guh. There is too much going on right now. I feel like I need to write more in order to keep my writing chops in check. But then I also need to work on projects. And I need to work on education for work, so I can get ahead. And. And. And.

It's a lot. I need some organization. I totally forgot about having Kendra help me with that. I need to remind her to remind me. Take it easy sometimes.

I'm trying to catch up with life. Working with Greg will help. It'll be good to have someone I really trust on the technical side; I'm not entirely uncomfortable with it, I just know that my talents seem to lie elsewhere. However, this time around I'll be assisting on it. Very much like a yin-yang: the head is where I focus, but the tail is the assist. On both parts.

It's also nice because, frankly, this is the guy that got me into game development. He's a programming wiz and I'm really excited to work on this experiment. There are no guarantees right now; we're just seeing if the band can play. But, I'm honestly feeling pretty good. We're both busy and we have limited time, so I think it will be good for both of us. We've narrowed our ideas down to two and I'll be selecting the winner today.

Anyway. I've got some work to do. I'm going to tinker with Swift a little bit and get some bookwork done for my job. 

It's been ages since I've updated. A lot has happened and will be happening. I've got a funeral coming up and a fairly big life event on Saturday. Beyond that, I've been taking classes and (somehow) passed them both. Meaning?

I DONE GRADUATED, SON.

If I wish to be, I am now done with college for the rest of my life. Thank. Goodness.

Now, to paying the bills associated with it. Good. Goooooood.

After this weekend, I should have a little more time for projects and getting things done. However, I've been looking over things lately and I'm realizing that I am the king of my own kingdom. I've a whole land of abandoned and dead projects. And, as per usual, I'm considering abandoning more.

One of the things I'm really trying to do is create something fun and different with my work.

Beyond that, another reality I'm having to learn to settle in is this: I may very well never have a career making games. It kind of sucks, but it may be for the best. I don't know that I'd ever have the stomach or talent to work on hits/what-have-you. I don't know that I'd have it in me to create something big enough to sell enough in order to keep a company floating.

The reality is, I am a surgical instrument tech. This is the job that pays me. And I need to keep my professional focus first-and-foremost on the job that pays me. So, I'm going to be working on certification. It's basically an educational flag that says, "Hey, I took a test about this stuff, and I passed it." However, I've always wanted to make a game that would help people with certification. The textbooks available are boring and poorly written, leading to a lot of dropped knowledge. I've always thought that an NES-style RPG where you ran a processing department would be super. 

So. Santa Saves Pyongyang? Hey, if you've been reading this blog, you know the drill. However, this time, I have to put it aside. I need to focus on the things at hand.

In less than two years, I will be looking at a situation that has me as a husband and a father. Kendra would kill me if I gave up on game development, and I would feel awful if I didn't do something to make our situation better. Two birds, as they say.

The plan? I need to make a game for instrument techs. This will help me apply what I learn into a game, giving me a double education bonus (if life were WoW). The game will be developed with Game Maker, as it is the simplest path.

After certification and the release of the instrument tech game, I'll work with Kendra on listing all of my projects (games and non-games) and ambitions, and we'll figure out the order in which to attempt them. I'm a lucky man to have her.

So, that's that. Also, I had a birthday in there. It's been as busy mess. But, in the next week, things will be less busy. Until October with the wedding/honeymoon.