Cici|Rhywind

He ended up telling Alfred because Alfred offered him a sandwich when he went to kitchen.

Dick: it's just a bunch of small things added together, you know? So no need to tell anyone.

Alfred, rummaging though the drawers for materials: I see.

Alfred gave Dick a few pats on the back, taping a 'Hug me' sign written with perfect handwriting on Dick's back with W.E.'s special industrial tape meant for emergency repairs on airplanes.

Jason sees the sign later, shrugs and tackles Dick onto the floor, then runs away laughing before Dick realizes what's going on.

Tim sees the sign later, and goes up to Dick with a nice cup of coffee and blanket and just piles himself on for a nap that lasted 3 hours.

Damian sees the sign later, and takes Titus with him to Dick, hugs him and runs away before he gets embarrassed while Titus sits on Dick's feet, begging for pets.

Cass sees the sign later, gives Dick a hug that lasted 5 minutes before taking a picture of the sign without Dick knowing and texting it to the girls.

Barbara sees the text in the group chat, and sends Dick a gif sending virtual hugs.

Steph sees the text, and video calls Dick for an hour while she was in a different city with her mom.

Duke comes back from patrol and sees the sign, hugging Dick briefly and asks him if he wants to join them for movies and games. Even though there were no prior plans at all and he had to hunt down everyone and ask before Dick notices.

Dick remains confused. The hugs are great, don't get him wrong, but he has no idea what got into everyone.

Then Bruce comes home from work, sees the sign, and proceeds to pick Dick up and carry him on his hip like a toddler.

Dick: ???????

Bruce: ....you want down?

Dick, wrapping himself around Bruce like an octopus: no.

Bruce: ok.

Dick doesn't discover the sign until the next day, after dinner, family night, and passing out for 12 hours straight.

Like I'm not so good at drawing that I can create the stuff I want. I'm not so good at writing to like, crunch out all the stories I want. My motivation sucks. Procrastination exist even when I'm doing something I genuinely love and want. I just don't know what I'm doing, with myself, or otherwise.

And there's the ever persisting money problems and financial stress. There isn't really time for me to idle but I can't focus???

Instead of journaling like a normal person, I decided to spent hours on a fake newspaper lol

I have no idea if this is actually going to be a weekly thing, but the feeling right now is: with this i'll actually have something to post about.

Bruce also isn't allowed not to have a favorite child. His children will riot.

Therefore, Bruce has a rotating schedule:

Monday = Tim

If there's one person who hates Mondays as much as Bruce, it's Tim. They quietly suffer together. Monday belongs to Tim.

Tuesday = Dick

Somehow Tuesday is even worse than Monday. Bruce requires an emergency dose of optimism, terrible puns, and his first baby bouncing into the Cave. Tuesday belongs to Dick.

Wednesday = Cass

Cass has dance class (if she's in Gotham at the time), and Bruce wouldn't miss watching her perform for the world. Wednesday belongs to Cass.

Thursday = Damian

Damian spends Monday through Thursday finishing his newest art project, because in his mind taking an entire week for anything is for the weak.

Also, Thursday is the day Damian decides Bruce is required to accompany him to a cat café or for ice cream.

Why Thursday? Because Bruce traditionally did father-child outings on Fridays, and Damian wanted his own day.

Who was Bruce to say no?

Friday = Jason

Jason stays the longest on Fridays. He would come and raid the pantry, the library, then he stays for dinner and for family night.

Bruce treasures every extra hour he gets with his son, even if Jason is only here for the free food.

Saturday = Steph

Steph believes Saturdays were invented for causing problems and shopping, and somehow always convinces Bruce to pay for whatever she wants.

This is entirely her fault because she refuses to use the allowance card Bruce keeps trying to give her.

Sunday = Duke

Sunday belongs to his Sunshine. No further explanation.

Everything is subjected to change because his children are gremlins. So if anyone annoys Bruce on their day, favorite-child status is immediately transferred to:

A. whoever called him "Dad" most recently.

B. whoever hasn't given him a headache lately

C. whoever hugged him last.

So funny story, remember when I did the fanwork exchange? Yeah, there was apparently a pt.2 to that LOL

Long story short: someone ghosted -> someone didn't get their gift -> people were asked to make one more -> I signed up because everyone knows my motivation sucks and this is basically free practice motivation lol

I'm actually pretty proud of it, despite the fact the more I look at them the more I see where I butchered it lol, but that's ok, learning process and all that lol

Jason: Ok, I know why you are here. You’re my dad, and you’re helping me carrying all these crap.

Bruce: Hn.

Jason, gesturing to Tim and Damian, who’re also helping with carrying his stuff: And I know why they are here, because they live with you.

Tim, snapping to attention: Wow, I can feel the love.

Damian: A simple ‘thank you’ would’ve sufficed, Todd.

Jason: And I know why Alfred is here, because he’s the one that drove us all the way here.

Alfred: Quite. Although I believe is your father that did most of the driving.

Jason: Yes, right. But what I don’t understand is why you are here.

Dick: I wouldn’t have missed it for the world :D

Jason: Neither would Steph, but you don’t see her taking time off school.

Dick: I love you very much :D

Jason: So does Cass, but she’s in Hongkong, and you don’t see her flying here just to see me go to college.

Dick: I’m very free because it’s still summer :D

Jason: And Duke is still on summer vacation, but you don’t see him skipping what he had to do.

Dick: :D

Jason: Right.

Jason: Well, if your boss gets mad at you for missing work in the middle of an important case, it’s not my fault.

It was after Jason finally left to his dorms, waving a hand goodbye without looking back, that the other half of the reason why Dick, and Tim for that matter, was here surfaced.

As soon as Jason was out of earshot:

Bruce: q.q QAQ TAT

Dick: Awwwwwwww, its ok B~

Bruce: downright sobbing because he’s so proud of Jason

Tim: We'll call him everyday.

Bruce: sobbing harder because he doesn’t want to bother Jason

Dick, mind reading: B~ it’s okay! We're his siblings. We'll annoy him until he calls you!!!!!

Alfred, also mind reading: Quite. That boy is going to do great, Mater Bruce, you got nothing to worry about.

Bruce: T^T

Tim, also also mind reading: Aw, B, we know you love us.

Look at me, avoiding my responsibilities lol

It's not 12 yet, I'm not late to the party! 🎉

Ok so, what if the batkids convinced everyone they know into giving Bruce Father's Day cards on the promise of he'll do you one favor if you do?

And this absolutely turns out to be true. It gets instantly abused, and Bruce now has a storage cabinet dedicated to these cards lol

Not a batfam post, shocker!

This is for the miraculous fanwork server's June fanwork exchange. This is also my first fanwork exchange ever! Yayyyyy!!! 🥳

Also I entered it knowing full well that I need to draw people, and that I don't exactly know how to draw people lol. So between procrastination and the deadline, I speed ran the process in like 20 days lol

I would say it turned out okay. Either way I'm pretty proud of it and I will keep practicing until I can put my sinister plans into action lol

Anyways, this entire thing took roughly 10 hours according to procreate. Just imagine me screaming the entire time and you'll have an accurate image of the chaos lol

Bruce: what's this.

Dick: a gift :D

Bruce: (unfortunately loves it)

Dick: :D

Bruce: hn.

It's cute, but you know it's civil war when the others see Bruce wearing it.

Jason: what is that abomination?!

Bruce: a shirt.

Tim: why are you wearing it????

Bruce: it's comfy.

Damian: it's hideous.

Bruce: it's not?

Cass: I think it's cute

Bruce: thank you.

Jason: Dickhead gave it to you.

Bruce: yes.

Dick: :D

Jason: favoritism!!!

Bruce: I don't have favorites.

Tim: favoritism!!!!

Bruce: it's not.

Damian: favoritism!!!!

Bruce: you know what, you're giving me grief.

Bruce: Dick and Cass and Duke are my favorites for the day.

Dick, Cass, Duke: :D

The others: (screech and tackle)

...and Bruce is not?

Look, May was kind of torturous for me for reasons unknown, so I don't have any fresh ideas to share lol. Therefore, shameless self promotion time, because this story is done and written, with maybe extra chapters....eventually lol. I'll attach a link....later lol

So the batkids, for reasons unknown, are terrified of bugs. Like it's completely irrational, none of them can control it, and they have a pact to never make fun of each other for this.

If people need comfort, they get comfort. If they need silence, they get silence. If they need support, or for someone to run and get Bruce to save them, then they get support, and someone will run to get Bruce to save them.

So it was fun and games, of sorts, until the hideous bug attacked while Alfred and Bruce weren't there.

It was already kind of Bruce's job to save his children? Except instead of coming home straight after-work, he's on a grocery run because Alfred said so, and Alfred himself is out in the gardens so he can't hear the batkids screaming. And all of their phones are compromised because someone tried to kill the spider with a game controller, but instead it killed all the phones (pushed them away from reaching distance).

They scatter, onto the back of couches, onto light fixtures, on top of the bookshelf, or the grand piano, squeeze in-between the frame photos on top of the fireplace, take over some poor vase's stand, anywhere far enough from the bugs.

The spider planted itself between them and the door, escape is not possible. Other options are explored, then Duke almost died because there was a dead spider right next to him that he found out late. Then Dick almost died because there was a giant cockroach with wings right next to him.

And Dad still wasn't here! Dad was late! No, he was dead! The spiders got to him!

The screaming grows in volume, and hysteria begins setting in during the panic, when Bruce bursts through the door surrounded by light like a halo.

Under the insistence rambling and various whining and pleading for help, Bruce managed to get the bugs eliminated, or out.

The batkids immediately attach themselves to Bruce without hesitation and don't let go for the next 3 days.

Bruce is exasperated, because he can't even take a step without two kids attached to his legs. But what was he going to do? Tell them to let go while they are still recovering from trauma? Absolutely not.

Extra ideas to be turned into chapters eventually:

1. Bruce thought he got rid of the fear for bats a long time ago. Well, new flash! He did not! And there one got in the kitchen and trapped him in the pantry. It was Bruce's turn to be overtaken by irrational fear and scream for help from his kids.

2. After Bruce's run in with the bat, he understood his kids a lot better, and connected his old college friends for help. Old college friend was a Miaojiang Saintess, she proceeds to laugh at him for a full 15 minutes before telling him she's got it, don't worry. A small jar of incense pill was sent with a postcard of written instructions. Bruce burns one, and let the scent spread in the manor. He's followed by his babies until they felt something in the air and attached themselves onto Bruce immediately. Then they proceeds to scream in horror as every insect and pest in the Wayne Manor runs to find the nearest exit.

After that horror, they call Bruce to bring the pills every time they so much see a bug in their living spaces, no matter where that is.

3. It's an alien invasion, Justice League calls the Titans in. Dick is all charismatic leader until he sees the aliens. They are all giant bugs with neon colors. He proceeds to kick ass aggressively while screaming. Then cries to Bruce afterwards.

...but his children run a black market right under his nose?

There are many reasons why Bruce bans it. It ranges from self depreciating, to embarrassment, to practical 'Batman is supposed to be scary'.

It is unfortunate that he loves his children, and they lives to make his life difficult.At first it was just in the family. Dick has vintage stuff no one else had. Jason has a full-out seamstress that he wouldn't share with the class. Tim has an entire catalog and some ultra rare stuff. Damian straight created his own. Stephanie steals. Barbara deals. Cass trades favors. And Duke stopped attempting to hide after a week.

They could've at least hidden it better, but they don't. They wear suits and sit around the dining table in the fancy dinning room and run it like a Mafia trade.

There were full out wars! For Batman merch! Someone got thrown off the stairs at one point!And Alfred doesn't even try to stop them! He just let it happen!

Bruce wants to disappear under a rock

.He is fine with other hero merch! He even brought them for his children! Heck, he brought the merch of his children! Why do they have to do this to him???

Bruce.exe does not understand.

Anyways, at some point, dealing within the family wasn't enough for them anymore. No, they expanded.

Tim separates a W.E. branch out to make the merch, filed the right paperworks, got them approved, the whole legal administrative shebang.

Dick, Steph, Cass, and Duke made idea lists, and held meetings over designs every week.

Jason takes the textile part of the idea list to his seamstress, and gets her to make mock ups and settle the pattern.

Damian makes an entire collector's edition.

They made an operation so well thought out, and sustainable, that Poison Ivy would approve.

This was getting out of hand. Bruce thought he ought to cut them off before the potential lack of numbers hurts their feelings.

That does not happen.

Apparently, Gotham, at least the normal people population, loves Batman. They, for real, believe that giving their child a Batman plushie would protect them from harm. That having a batarang sticker on their door would ward off evil. That having a little Batman keychain hanging on their bags and purses would prevent them from getting robbed.

This entire thing fries Bruce's brain for a good couple of days.

Then, because the universe hates him, his children released Wayne merch.

Those somehow sell even better than Batman merch.

Because Gotham, apparently loves him. Both sides of him. Because 'guy's a disaster, but he tries', 'Wayne Foundation helped my family', 'you can tell someone cares'.

That's when, with a little more help from his children, Bruce finally realizes that people don't care whether or not Batman, or Bruce Wayne, is perfect or not.

Gotham always knew. And the people stayed anyways. Because they can tell.

Bruce shuts himself in his room and cries as emotions process, until he falls asleep from exhaustion.

(it's ok, he wakes up buried under all of his children. And he is exactly where he wants to be.)

(no more self depreciating thoughts, at least for now)