lesser evil

in real life you will probably not respond to harassment in a sexy, clever, scripted way where you come out with the upper hand and everyone claps. you will freeze up and your moment will pass, or your voice will shake when you tell them to stop and you’ll realize two minutes later that you’re gross and sweaty and sticky from the adrenaline. maybe you’ll be on the ball and answer in a way you actually think is pretty smart and get ignored, or they’ll get more aggressive when you mouth off to them. you almost never will walk away feeling victorious. you walk away feeling uncomfortable and relieved that it’s over. you’ll think about it later and imagine that maybe you could have said something else. maybe you’ll feel ashamed that you weren’t quicker-witted, weren’t able to cut them down to size, weren’t able to avoid that lingering sick feeling in the pit of your stomach, as though there’s some kind of magical words you could have said that would have left you feeling less powerless. there really aren’t. 

Honestly this is such an important lesson to learn. If someone threatens, belittles, or verbally assaults you, you will likely feel bad, no matter how you respond. Please don’t beat yourself up for feeling emotions that are perfectly healthy and justified. 

something about netflix castlevania felt really weird but oddly familiar in the way the story is medieval low fantasy and yet every character is not only speaking in a super modern way but constantly dunking on eachothers backstories, dropping f bombs with impunity, and going on 5 minute tangents on whether or not vampires really are killed by running water and I couldn’t put my finger on it until I realized they all talk like they’re players in a dnd campaign

making art is literally actually like doing an exorcism u have to get it out of ur brain. u have to

i almost scrolled past but then i remembered the time I woke up at 3:30 in the morning with a scene in my head and couldn't go back to bed until it was on paper and out of my head.

My favourite part of this is the concept that the reason they had to leave was because they were literally a Dracula and thus, beholden to vampire rules.