enTitled

Dating is easy af tbh. First, you make a great number of deranged and vividly insane personal posts on tumblr until someone dms you. Then you marry them.

tumblr is the safest social media to open in public bc nobody recognises its interface. if u recognise it thats ur problem

me addressing serious topics: yo that's wild

hewwo….??? *looks around frightened*

*i silently cock my gun from behind a bush and get ready to pull the trigger*

this man does the math and delivers your change

name us and the contract will be sealed

i started blogging cause they got rid of space pinball

if i was a young dandy in the 1800s tumblr would be such a great place. i would hear about it and immediately interpret it as “something of a town hall of the soul…. a corkboard of the mind! a ha! ahahaha!” and start clapping with odd space between each clap. my first post would be “Here’s something for all of you out there- a joke I heard passing through Crane’s Alleyway. The wise bull and the dull man walked between two great oaks- one of red wood, and the other of white. The dull man said “such great, sturdy wood- to build a house, or perhaps a fine campfire!” and deployed his saw with great ease. The wise bull simply chuckled and said “For you, perhaps, this wood makes a fine house… but for me, it is a house in itself!” and took it upon himself to enjoy the shade the great trees provided!”