benjamin poindexter x reader drabble / masterlist / mdni
dex attempting to knock you up (kind of)
you donât think dex wants kids, not really. youâve never actually talked about it, but because of everything, because of your lives, especially his, you always figured it wasnât something he wanted or was possible. maybe not now, maybe not ever.
but then heâs got you on your back and heâs still fucking you even after heâs already come, thrusting into you with this rough, frustrated rhythm like heâs annoyed by his own orgasm and by the wet, filthy mess of it between your thighs. his cock keeps dragging through his own cum every time he pushes back in, and he just keeps going, eyes pinned to your cunt like heâs watching for something. every time his cum leaks out of you, slipping from your swollen pussy and smearing down to your ass, his jaw gets tighter, his brows pull together and his eyes get a little glassier, like he might actually cry. itâs like it pisses him off, seeing it outside of you.
and maybe thatâs all it is, maybe itâs just dex wanting every part of himself in you, wanting to feel how full your pussy is with him, wanting to watch his cock disappear into you while his cum is still spilling back out around the base. you think maybe he just likes the sight of it and the slick sound every time he drives back in and fucks the mess deeper, the way you whine when his thrusts get sloppier. but maybe itâs more than that too. maybe that little crease in his forehead every time he sees his seed dripping out of your cunt means something worse.
because a relationship can end. you could get tired of him, sick of him, wake up one day and decide heâs too much work, too obsessive, too broken, too difficult to keep loving.
and marriage is an option too, for sure. in a dark little corner of his mind, maybe that appeals too. not because itâs romantic, but because divorce is such a long, miserable, exhausting pain in the ass that maybe youâd look at the paperwork and lawyers and court dates and just decide itâd be easier to keep him, tolerate him, let him stay, simply because getting rid of him would be more annoying than living with him. itâs sick and irrational, which is exactly why it feels like something dex might actually think.
but a baby would be better. a baby would make it permanent in a way nothing else could. even if you wanted him gone, if one day you couldnât stand the sight of him, heâd still be there dropping the kid off at your place, standing next to you at recitals, parent-teacher meetings, sports games, graduations. your life would be tied to his in a way that couldnât be undone.
and maybe thatâs why he gets like this, why his hand grips your hip so hard while he stares at your pussy taking him, why he curses under his breath when his cum pushes out of you again. maybe thatâs why he drags his cock out to watch it spill from your used hole before he immediately pushes two thick fingers into your cunt and fucks it back inside you with this tense, focused look on his face.
your pussy is already puffy and oversensitive, and he still canât leave it alone. he has to spread you open with his fingers and press the mess back in, watching it leak over his knuckles, then push it deeper like he can somehow make it stay if heâs stubborn enough. itâs not like heâs stupid. he knows youâre on birth control, but that doesnât stop some ugly little part of him from thinking he can still make it stick.
not because dex wants a baby in some soft, normal way. heâs not secretly dreaming about cribs and baby names, definitely not right now.
dex just wants in, wants to stay, and wants something of himself buried so deep in your life that you could never cleanly pull him out again. and maybe, in the filthiest corner of his mind, knocking you up feels like the surest way to do it.
a/n: sending you a smooch for reading, thank you:3 and a million dollars if you reblogged (you're literally carrying fanfic writers on your back).
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
â Live Streamingâ Interactive Chatâ Private Showsâ HD Qualityâ Free Actions
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
summary: when you struck the arrangement with damian wayne to act as your fake boyfriend for a party hosted by your ex and ex-best friendâyou thought your choice made perfect sense. choosing damian wayne, the most logical, unattainable person you knew, removes the complication of feelings being involved. till of course, damian stops pretending.
pairing: damian wayne x fem! reader
content: flufff, damian wayne is a yearner and takes his role of being your pretend boyfriend very seriously.
"You are suggesting I partake in a fake relationshipâ" Damian Wayne stares down at you, still dressed in his lab coat, with what may be the closest to genuine concern you've ever seen on him, all cramped into the crease of his brows. "To help with your dilemma?"
"Exactly." Your grin is the only positive staple throughout this entire exchange, after your successful cornering of only the most unattainable medical student of Gotham University. "It's like a fancy title for an assignment partner but removing the word 'assignment', right?"
"Assuming that your ambitious plan would even work." Crossing his arms, Damian looks more unimpressed over your carefully planned spreadsheet titled 'Fake-Dating Operation' than the earlier assigned pairings by Dr. Lake. "Do humour me on your astounding confidence that I would even offer my assistance."
"We're already assigned together for the semester." You shrug. "What's one reunion party, and an hour spent pretending you don't hate my guts like you do with everyone else?"
He stares at you for a long beat, before his lips twitch into the smallest smirk. "I appreciate your attempts at lowering my expectations further on how idlers are able to accomplish wasting hours in a day. I expect your section of the report to be done by Sunday."
"Wait!" Your hand reaches out to grab at the ends of his sleeve as he moves past you. "I am an amazing fake partner. I provide free dog walks, cookies, amazing work ethicâit's practically a free service just for a little acting on your part!"
"I appreciate the desperation, and the answer is still a no."
"Wayne!" You call out as his sleeve slips out of your fingers, stopping in your tracks right in front of himâblocking the exit. "Damian, please."
His head tilts to cast you a disapproving expression. "My word of advice, is to gain enough respect for yourself to not be bothered by what others think."
Your lips pull together into a frown, but you refuse to be dissuaded, not when you've already laid all your cards on the table. You didn't expect it to be easy, and you had already prepared yourself for his vicious tongue.
"My self-respect has already been trampled on when they decided to send me the invitation." You state honestly. "It's scheduled for its revival in five weeks, after the party. I'll be a changed person by then, scout's honour."
His brow pulls higher, as if silently questioning if you had even part of the Gotham Scouts, but you're not done.
"But before then, I plan on being the pettiest, deranged person in all of Gotham University." You declare. "And that includes you in my plans, because you, Damian Wayne, are the only person who checks all my requirements of a fake boyfriend."
"I'm honoured." He mocks, gaze flickering past towards the hallway.
"You are Walter's role-model, he would kiss the test tubes you lay your fingers on. Paige has a Pinterest folder labelled with your name, and it has all your news sightings saved by colour coordination."
"Sounds like your issues derive more from the company you keep." He mutters, expression pulled together in disgust.
"Point besides, I want it to be you, Damian Wayne." You confess.
It sounds ridiculous, but this was fully concerning your pride and something you've forgotten in your years of working yourself away for your dreams, which was the taste for controlled chaos. He blinks once, staring at you incredulously as if deciding where to place you in his ranking of newly discovered lunatics.
"You're the only person who will drive them as insane as they've made me." Your voice chokes, filled with determination or buried rage, the difference didnât seem to matter. "You could walk in there for just an hour to save my life, and I know that you won't have the slightest chance of complicating things, or falling in love with meâand that's what makes this perfect. This may sound crazy to you, but you're the only person that's made sense to me ever since my life was turned upside-down."
Your chest heaves, and your arms are still outstretched to stop him from leaving the lab. You're nothing like thisâimpulsive, frantic, verging on insanityâbut you're also done being complacent. Of letting things go just because it's the right thing to do.
After what feels like eternity, Damian's expression flickers. Implicit and almost undetectable, but his gaze is on you as if he's finally registering your existence and trying to catalogue you into a different box than the one he's placed you in.
"Send the spreadsheet to my email." He answers apprehensively, as if he can't believe the words coming out of his mouth. "I will review through the calendar on its... feasibility. Expect a response by eight p.m.."
You let out a held breath, a smile finally breaking through. "Thank you, reallyâ"
"On the condition that I expect you to finish your section by tonight."
Your expression freezes. "Tonight?"
"To prove your desperation's worth considering." He tosses you a mocking smile, all sharp edge and nothing considerable of warmth. "You have ten more hours before my interest wanes."
Your smile weakens, blinking rapidly as you calculate your remaining time to draft something of substance. "Okay, sureâ that's not going to be a problem."
It's worth it. Dealing with Damian Wayne is going to be worth it.
I have reviewed through your spreadsheet in detail. Do answer my enquiries on my comments below.
- I believe watching romance comedy as 'theory practice' is highly inefficient and prone to fantastical expectations. Do amend this.
- As for my 'meeting' availabilities, I am free on Thursdays and Fridays at noon to two, on the condition that at least an hour be reserved for actual assignment discussions. You are required to provide evidence of actual progress for the assignment, or this arrangement will be considered void.
- Provide me a list summary on details for answers regarding possible interrogation questions during the party. It will be more efficient as compared to you providing me the details in person.
As for the assignment, your section draft is acceptable, and I expect our lab findings to be updated into your table by the following lab session next week.
Regards,
Damian.
You can barely contain your grin, kicking into the sheets despite the exhaustion that plagues your bones from grueling non-stop over the section and multiple tabs later. He had looked through your multi-coloured spreadsheet calendar, and actually considered it with his own enquiries. Typing out your own response, you give serious thought into his enquiries.
To: [email protected]
Subject: Reply: 'Fake-Dating Operation' Spreadsheet Review
Thank you for your detailed consideration of my spreadsheet. Your efforts are acknowledged and appreciated.
- I believe we are required to watch at least one rom-com that involves fake-dating. Neither of us have had previous experience in this department (unless you'd like to share valuable information), and it will boost our success rate.
- Perfect! I'm available on Fridays, and scout's honour, I promise to have my progress brought for each meeting session.
- As for the list, I will provide you possible answers, but some may require in-person explanations. I'll explain more this Friday!
Can't even express my thanks on how grateful I am, you're the best Wayne in history!
Signing off your name, you close your laptop with the giddiest smile you've had sinceâat the reminder, your grin falters. Your chest thuds faintly, as if reminding you that the fun you've just experienced can still be dampened by reality. No, you refuse to let it ruin your enjoyment.
This is the most alive you've felt in weeks, and you're going to make the most of it. If your life feels like it's finally picking up through colourful spreadsheet rows and columns, and waiting on an email reply from the most terrifying student in Gotham Universityâso be it.
Damian slides your extremely lengthy list across the lunch table, and you can barely hide your shock that he actually printed it outâbefore you catch sight of many red circles marked neatly around your points.
"Your least favourite vigilante is Robin?" He interrogates.
You blink in surprise, not expecting him to start there. "Well, he's not exactly originalâI mean, câmon, theyâre multiple versions of him."
His lips part, aghast in a half-caught scoff. "He's one of the most prominent vigilante figures in Gotham."
You shrug. "Spoiler's cooler."
He clicks at his tongue. "You have horrible taste."
"You are not telling me that you, Damian Wayne, have a favourite and that is Robin?"
He doesn't blink. "There are several other questionable details in your list."
"Yes, I can see that." Peering back at your list, your brows furrow. "What's wrong with liking Gotham's Pizza?"
"Only that you're clearly fond of days-old grease and artificial cheese."
"Hey, that's where it gets its flavour."
He shakes his head, disgusted. "I refuse to be associated with someone who has non-functioning taste buds."
"Fineâwe'll say we often have dates at Romeo's instead." You shrug. "Not like I'll be caught there after our agreement's expired."
He raises a brow. "Expired?"
Pointing at your open tab, you reference a newly added row. "Our break-up, scheduled for Monday after the party."
He stares at the date, before his gaze roams over you with a questioning look. "Despite my lack of experience, should you not consider the likely suspicions if you were to end a relationship three days after the party?"
Your lips part into an 'oh'. "I thought you would want to get it over and done with as quickly as possible."
His expression closes in, gaze narrowing. "I will not put my reputation at stake by agreeing to this facade, if it means having our efforts go down the drain because of an obvious flaw.â
Your grin slips out uncontrollably. âYou just said âourâ efforts. Look at us, the perfect team.â
His expression remains impassive, before he raises a slow brow. âSwitch to the assignment tab.â
âYes, sir.â
Resting below a willow tree, your third Friday with Damian is spent resting below the shade on your picnic clothâone you used to share with Paige. The sight of its red plaid, stuffed behind your piles of clothes in your wardrobe, was getting sadâeven for you.
Damianâs back is resting against the tree bark, shoulders nearly taking up the widthâbrows impossibly furrowed as his gaze narrows on your laptop displaying âTo All The Boys I Loved Beforeâ.â
âThis movie is non-sensical.â
âI think itâs romantic.â You shrug.
He tosses you a judgmental glance. âHaving your own blood betray you by revealing your own personal letters, is your idea of romance?â
âI mean Lara Jean and Peter, Damian.â You snort. âThatâs our main source of inspiration.â
âHeâs hardly appealing.â He scoffs, arms crossing over the other. âIs this the standards you expect from our arrangement?â
âIf this is mediocreââ You respond, aghast. âYou have no idea how dire love can be nowadays.â
His frown deepens. âYou are not expecting me to perform in this manner?â
âWhatâfalling in love with me?â You grin. âNo, I do not expect you to be Peter Lavinsky.â
He stares at you with barely concealed frustration. Before you can tease him further, something purple is tossed into your face.
A yelp escapes your mouth, the light weight of an object falling into your lap.
âThatâsâthe discontinued, limited edition Spoiler cap!â You gasp, eyes widening in realisation. âHow did you get this?â
He shrugs begrudgingly. âMy sister used to be a collector. She doesnât mind giving it away.â
âGiving it away?â You mutter incredulously. âThis is actual gold. Your sister is my favourite person on Earth.â
His brow twitches. âI bargained for that cap.â
You snort. âWhat did you exchange it for, your dignity?â
âYou have no clue on my sacrifice." He grimaces.
âYour sacrifice is acknowledged." You tease, before letting out another huff of amazement. âThis is the best day of my life.â
When your gaze falls back to the cap, tracing your fingers over the logoâyou miss the twitch of his lips into a semblance of a smile.
You missed todayâs meeting without prior notice. Not that your absence has affected my ability to resume our assignment, but after your frequent reminders to not miss on our mandatory meetingsâit leaves me with doubt that you intentionally missed our sessions on your end. Do update me as soon as possible on your status.
Regards,
Damian. (Sent yesterday, 1.20 p.m.)
Subject: Reply: Reminder on Friday Meetings
I feel I must reinstate that my previous email regarding your absence, as well as this reply, should not be twisted in its meaning as more than a mere enquiry. Given previous evidence of the average speed of your responses, a full 24 hours with a lack of response prompts me to send another email. Do respond when you are able.
Regards,
Damian. (Sent today, 1.32 p.m.)
Three respectable knocks resound against your dormitoryâs door. A groan escapes your lips, your head pounding from the cold youâve caught from a late night running through pouring rain. You had missed the bus and had to make it back before curfew, and now your body is reminding you of its frail mortality, chills shaking throughout your limbs and rendering you heavily immobile.
The knocks echo again when you shift your head deeper into the pillows. You muffle curses into the cotton, gripping at your sheets to steady yourself as you force your body upright. The world sways on its axis as you make your wayâshifting pathetically with every step, towards the door.
Missing your lock a few times, you finally grab a hold of the chain and slide it off, clicking the door open. Youâre immediately faced with a broad chest, donning a familiar black sweater. Shifting your gaze up, youâre met with Damian Wayneâs narrowed gaze, sweat trailing down his temple.
âDamian?â Your voice croaks, and even the attempt of speaking hurts. âWhat are you doing here?â
He takes one glance, and immediately, his expression contorts in⌠concern? You barely have time to explain about the cold, or an apology for missing the meeting, when you feel the warmth of his palm press against your forehead.
You blink, stunned as he measures your temperature. He shakes his head slightly in a disapproving manner. âYour temperature is too high.â His tongue clicks with his observation.
You suppose he was right. You did feel one wrong step from keening over and lying on your welcome mat.
âI got caught in the rain.â You explain, trying your best to pull together a more reassuring expression, one less filled with nausea-induced tension. âIâll be fineâjust need rest.â
His frown creases deeper. âHave you taken medicine?â
You try shaking your head, but that loses whatever balance you had left. The world actually tilts, or maybe you are the one who's obeying gravityâbut strong arms catch you before you collapse.
âLook at your state.â Damian grits, pulling you back upright but closer. There's barely any space left between the two of you. âThis fever, has it worsened considerably?â
âYeahâbut I didnât have anyone to call.â You mutter in truth, cheek still smushed against his chest as support. âI ran out of medicine a while ago, and by the time I woke upâI couldnât get out of bed.â
You feel his arms tense around you. Above the crown of your head, you feel a soft sigh. âYou have me.â He mutters, almost reprimanding.
Your brows furrow in confusion. âYou would get me medicine?â
âThat would be a start.â He states, his grip shifting with his words.
The world shifts again when his hands wrap around the under of your thighs, lifting you into his arms gently to not worsen your state. If your mind wasnât completely swarmed by the symptoms of your cold, youâd stop to think of how strangely sweet it was that Damian had come all the way to your dormitory, and that he was carrying you bridal-style towards your bed.
âItâs not usually this messy.â You feel the need to point out, words muffled against his sweater. âYou just have impeccable timing.â
His lip twitches involuntarily as he sets you down against the thrashed sheets. âOrganised according to your system?â
You smile weakly at the thought of your colour-coded spreadsheet. âExactly.â
He places his palm against your forehead again, and you subconsciously find yourself leaning into his touch. âYouâre likeâreally warm.â You murmur. âDo you always run hot?â
He swallows, touch lingering on your skin. âYour temperature is dysregulated. Iâll return soon with medicine. Rest. I wonât be gone long.â
âOkay.â Your lids fall shut, the pounding lessening with your head burrowed into the pillows, and his touch a gentle anchor. âYou knowâyouâd be a great boyfriend for someone one day.â
You donât hear a response, and your honest thoughts continue to tumble out from your skull like a cracked jar. âYouâre really nice, Dami.â The shortening of his name feels like cotton candy stuffed in your mouth, and you barely register the stiffening of his fingers. âFierce, but I like that about you. I like you a lot, actually. Not in a swooning way, but in aâIâm really glad I met you kind of way.â
He doesnât pull away when your lips finally clamp shut, but the silence is almost deafening. You peek open with one eye, catching his expression. Heâs staring at you⌠as if no oneâs ever said that to his faceâever.
âDonât make it weird.â You tease softly, voice tethered with exhaustion. âIâm just giving you your deserved five stars.â
You hear the soft echo of his scoff, withheld from its usual bite, but you donât hear much else after. Only that the lingering touch of his fingers over your skin stays put till sleep catches up on you, and the world falls silent under the weight of Damianâs gaze. Okay, maybe you were lying a little about the swooning.
Fevers fade, but the warmth that lingers seems to seep past the well-defined borders of a spreadsheet, or the predictable order of a listâlike the one currently in your hand.
"Favourite vigilante?" You quiz, red pen bitten between your lips as you laid stretched on the wooden bench.
"Spoiler." He answers, tossing you an expression as if to convey that he couldn't believe you even bothered with such a question.
"Good job." You tease, fiddling with the cap of your pen, attached at the end. "Favourite date spot?"
"Gotham's Pizza." He huffs.
You blink. "Hey, it's supposed to be Romeo's."
"You prefer Gotham's." He mutters.
"But you don't." You remind him.
Averting his gaze to your lips, his fingers loop around the red pen, dragging it gently out from your teeth's grip, and adjusting the answer with a cross. "That's irrelevant. I'm merely pointing out an inconsistency."
Your lips quirk up into a smile. "You don't even need this list anymore. Why bother keeping it?"
Tension pulls briefly at his jaw, but it relaxes before you can trace it to an emotion. "You haven't tested me on all the questions."
You lean in, the crinkled paper resting below your fingers as you gaze into his eyes. "Alright? Something off the books." You hum. "What do I think of Damian Wayne?"
He blinks, surprised. You wait patiently, the warmth of summer carrying the scent of grass blades past the picnic table, the world narrowing into the space between the two of you.
His lips part after a moment. "Fierce." He answers. "Though you're one of the few who doesn't run from it."
"What's there to run from?" You hum. "I think he's nice, you should give him some credit for that."
His brow raises, amusement flickering in his gaze. "That's not a common perception."
"Yeah, but no one else gets to experience him being their partner." You tease. "He even offers to rearrange your dormitory to a better system if you're lucky."
He scoffs lightly. "That's only considering if the existing system barely works."
"Just say you hate colour-coding, Dami." You snort. "I know you're itching to fix our spreadsheet."
His expression flickers for a moment. "Not exactly."
You tilt your head, questioning. His gaze averts to the open spreadsheet, something familiar after the weeks spent together. "It's grown on me."
Grown on himâdespite it being everything he initially found horrendous, from the many details pasted in long paragraphs into the comments, and the bright colours for the special shared Fridays between you two. Something warm pools in your chest, and you find your gaze trailing to the red pen held between his fingers instead.
"You're more prepared for this party than I am." You admit softly.
You feel his attention switch onto you, trained on the nervous tick you have where you hyper-focus on something brightly coloured. He twirls the pen once, considering.
"You don't have to go through with this." He says. "Just say the word. I'll honour whatever decision you make."
His reassurance makes you consider it, you really do. With the dreaded anticipation finally reaching its peak, with the party being tonightâyou have stopped to think if it was worth it. To show up in a room where the story's long gone sour, and your presence is more likely to be a blight than a welcomed gift.
Then again, you hadn't prepared this all for nothing. You hadn't gotten to know Damianâfor nothing.
"No, it'll be fun." You smile, meeting his gaze. "We'll be just like Lara Jean and Peter, but with better standards."
Damian's mouth twitches, almost imperceptible. "Agreed."
Your fingers catch onto the silk-like fabric of your dress. Once bought as a birthday present, you never had the chance to wear something like this. Walter had called it overkill, and you convinced yourself that youâd eventually find a day to wear the gorgeous shade without feeling inadequate for it. Nothing required overkill more than tonight.
Damian's promised to pick you up, even when you had reassured him that meeting at the venue was fine. You stare at yourself in the mirror, and something quivers in your gut.
You don't feel as brave as you'd like, not even in your favourite dress. The thought of the two people you once trusted most being together, exchanging normal niceties with you as if nothing had ever happenedâyou're seriously beginning to overthink just how horribly awkward this situation was going to be.
What if it wasn't like the movies? What if Damian saw tooâjust how horribly small you feltâand decided you weren't worth the spreadsheets and lists and medicine kit he over-splurged on when you caught that cold?
The party was going to be over in an hour, you had promised Damian the both of you would be present for no more than that durationâand now, you feel ridiculous in your own skin. You're tempted to text him if he wanted to ditch and just head to Romeo's insteadâwhen you hear the signature three knocks of his against your door.
You swallow your fear-induced nausea back into your gut, and force yourself to open the door with something akin to a smile. Your expression freezes in place at the sight... of Damian tidied up.
You knew he was handsome, you obviously had eyes, but to see him in that white collared shirt that made his green eyes pop, loosened at the buttons, with his hair pulled back and justâwow. Damian Wayne, you were seriously going to the party with this guy? As your fake boyfriend?
You don't notice the way his own expression completely falters at the sight of you. Nor the way his fingers tightened into a fist, digging into his palms.
You only notice how the silence stretched out between the two of you lingers long enough to matter.
"Hey, handsome." You start, trying to regain your composure. "You cleaned up nice."
He blinks, as if stunned. His response comes out delayed, brows pinching together into something honest. "You are beautiful."
Not you lookâas if he's only noticed. No, he emphasised the 'are', as if he's always seen it. Your heart doesn't quite know what to do with that information, or how to catalogue the way he's looking at you as if he'sânot pretending.
"Thank you." Your voice comes out weaker than you intended, because for all his intensity, Damian being soft is what renders you stunned. "I still don't know if I should do this."
His gaze clears, something steady offered to you when you return it. "You don't need to be sure." He answers, offering his hand. "That's what I'm here forâso you will not be alone."
He's right. Despite your doubts, seeing him in front of you reminds you of the steady presence he's offered from the very beginning. Through your nonsensical email threads, the Friday lunches, the rom-com binging, rushing to the store to buy you cold medicineâyour fears always quieted when Damian was near. Your smile brightens, taking his hand in yours. "Let's get this operation over with."
Walter catches sight of you first. His vision is perfectly facing the entrance, your ex's gaze meeting yours as soon as you step through the doorwayâand he immediately taps on Paigeâs shoulder. An insincere smile arrives on his expression, but it freezes in place the moment Damian enters with you.
He isn't the only one to notice. You knew the effect Damian had on others, standing out without even meaning to, much less in an environment like this. Damian doesn't seem bothered at all, because you feel his attention acutely trained on you instead. His hand rubs a soothing notion over your lower back, as if you're the only person he's aware that exists in the room.
Walter's gaze drifts, from the dress he hated to Damianâs hand wrapping around your waist. He puts the facts together, faster than you had when he and Paige had approached you with the news. The warmth leaves his welcoming expression, and he whispers something into Paige's ear.
Damian registers this entire exchange in under a second, and his hand tightens briefly on your waist, as if reassuring you that he was right beside you.
The distance closes in between you and the two people your life once revolved around, and you train your gaze on Walter, because you can tell immediately that Paige is struck by Damian's appearance, more so by his hand on your waist.
"It's been a while." Walter starts off, though his gaze barely lingers on you before switching to Damian. "Wayne, I don't believe we've been properly introduced."
"There hasn't been a need." Damian shuts him down.
The atmosphere turns icy the moment Walter registers the tone of Damian's voice. He laughs, astonishedâand embarrassed. Paige finally recovers in an attempt to salvage the situation, pulling together her best smile.
"Well, it's lovely to have you both here." Paige starts, and her voice is distantânothing like the girl you used to know, hidden under the blankets of your beaten IKEA sofa when watching Scream for the tenth time. "You look amazing, andâsorry, I'm just curious on how the two of you know each other?"
Her question is directed towards you, but Damian takes the lead. "She's my partner."
"Partner?" Walter chokes on his breath. "As inâ"
You finally find your voice to speak. "We are seeing each other." It comes out levelled, matching Damian's.
Their shock registers in different levels. Walter's nears disbelief, while Paigeâlooks at you, betrayed.
"I didn't know about this." Paige stammers.
"Yes, you didn't." You answer shortly.
She stares at you as if she's seeing a stranger. "Right. I guess it's been a long time since we've caught up."
You're tempted to laugh. A long time is an understatement. You can feel Damian's low scoff against your shoulder, and the absurdity of the situation feels less gut-wrenching with him by your side.
"You know she's a real mess." Walter speaks involuntarily. "Like her apartment's an actual hazard. Isn't that right, Paige?"
Paige freezes, lips parting into a gap, but Damian's faster.
"I am awareâthat she has her own unique system." Damian states, gaze narrowing in discontent. "It didn't take long for me to understand it, or to appreciate it."
"Appreciate it?" Walter sneers. "Are you sure you're talking about the right person?"
"Yes." Damian doesn't hesitate, eyes steady, fixing yours. As if he was conveying it to you instead of the audience, he answers. "I'm sure."
You swallow dryly, unable to hide the softened smile you usually reserved for him only when it was the two of you. Both of them catch sight of it, and you can sense the question becoming less of whether it was real, and more of the how.
It's easy to act in love when Damian's this close, muttering words like that, with his familiar warmth grounding you through the stagnant conversation. So instinctive, that you think it's easier than breathing.
You sense Paige shifting closer and you force yourself to focus, and casting her another glance, only to finally catch a glimpse of the girl who used to be your closest person.
âHey, can we talk?â Her expression is vulnerable, tentative in her offer. "Y'know, catch up in private."
Damian immediately shifts you back slightly with his weight, but you place a hand tentatively on his arm. His gaze locks onto you, reading into your expression. His brow raises as if to ask, 'You're sure?'. You give him a nod.
"Fine by me." You murmur, because despite everythingâmaybe a part of you still wanted to hear the honest truth. For her decision, on when she decided you shouldâve been cut out of the picture then forcefully glued back into what they envisioned to be the perfect way to continue their lives. Maybe you just wanted to see if the Paige you knew still existed.
The moment you enter an unoccupied bathroom, Paige presses the door shut and immediately turns to you. "You have to spill."
Your brows furrow. "On?"
"Damian Wayne." She points out as if it's obvious. "You don't even know him."
You blink once then twice, and something colder settles in the cavity of your chest. "Things change, Paige."
âIâm just worried. It's all just so sudden.â Her hand reaches out to grasp yours, and you resist the instinctive flinch. âYouâve always been sensitive, and a guy like him is just bad news. I meanâDamian Wayne? I get that it feels exciting, but he barely knew of your existence before and now, he's suddenly dating you? I just want us to be on the same page here, that it doesn't really make sense."
A scoff rises up your throat, barely constrained as she continues on, her softened voice a perfect replica of how she had been when you first made your decision to break up with Walter.
âYou know Iâll always support you if you need me.â She reassures. âYou can tell me anything.â
The anger bubbles so violently, and it hits you. That despite everything, you had came into this party hoping that maybe a fraction of the girl you knewâwho cried with you on bathroom floors when you experienced homesickness, who celebrated when you managed to pass your first year of medical school, who was there for your entire life in Gothamâwould still exist. That something would give way, and her leaving would make sense, to have a reason. You realise now, that you've only been giving her excuses on the basis of what she used to mean to you.
Your wrath gives way to something cold, absent of griefâonly the need to rip your hand out of hers. You do just that, and her shock barely registers before you open your mouth. âNo.â Your voice carries a finality, strength youâve been trying to garner since the day you lost her. âYou donât get to define my relationship with Damian, when you never addressed ours.â
She blinks, affronted. âIs this about Walter? We've already explainedâwe only felt what we did after the two of you broke upââ
âNo, this isnât about Walter. This is about us.â The coldness in your tone finally strikes something honest in her expression. âYou broke my trust, Paige, and then you invite me to this party cause you thought it would help make amends? I thought you brought me in here, to at least explain to me on what happened to us."
"You should've told me." She says, a frown stretched at her lips. "If you weren't comfortable being around me and Walter, we wouldn't have forced you to come."
Weâthe word runs through your mind like a tire screech.
âYes, I wasn't comfortableâI nearly died inside when it happened." You raise your head. "I lost my best friend, who drove me to karaoke night whenever I needed to forget about home. I lost the girl who swore to re-watch all rom-coms that ever existed in the 90s before we both turned fifty. I lost the only person I trusted since I moved into this city, over whatâa man? Was it worth it, was our friendship worth it?â
She swallows thickly, and you see a fracture of the girl you recognise under the glitter, and the tears collecting at her lower lashes. âI thought you understoodâthat I love him differently than you did.â
Your gaze doesnât flinch at the admission. âYou were by my side when he broke up with me, when I told you that he called my dresses ugly, when he said my attitude was too much, when he made me smaller because it was more convenient for him when I was quieter, and you still got together with him. Maybe I thought you loved me enough too, to understand why I wasn't comfortable with it.â
Her expression shatters, and tears drip down her cheeks before she harshly wipes at them, smearing her eyeshadow. âYou donât get to say that.â She spits out. âMaking it seem like I chose Walter over you, when you brought in Damian Wayne.â
Your brows contort. âWhat are you talking about?â
âYou decided to come to the party toâprove you suddenly became better than us just by being with a Wayne?â She snaps. âYou're acting like this because you think he's going to stayâbut you donât seriously believe itâll actually last when Walter could barely stand you?â
That anger, buried deep, comes alive with a roar. You take a step forward, causing her to inch backward as you close in. âThat's all youâre taking from this?" Your scoff resounds coldly. "Damian was the one who was there for me when you leftâso yeah, I have more trust in him to treat me like an actual person."
She flinches, her lips parting in the same way she had done earlier when Walter tried to make you small. Silent, and unable to do anything but lay there in her guilt of absorbing an idea of who you are in Walter's head, and erasing what made you human in her eyes.
"Rest assured. You will never gain my trust again to even know whatâs going on in my life and the people in it, and you never will.â
Taking a step back, you look at her one last time. Of the mess of her makeup, the same puffy eyes whenever she cries that you used to immediately follow up with the instinct to comfort her. You feel none of that now. âGoodbye, Paige.â
She doesnât call out your name when you turn your back on her, and she doesnât come after you. You needed that, more than you needed her to be the person you thought she was. To be blunt, and truthful to yourselfâeven if no one but you believed in it.
The euphoric lightness of your body from finally severing the bond doesnât last long, when a rough hand grabs at your wrist. Being twisted around, youâre faced with Walterâs accusing expression.
âWhat did you say to her?â
âWhat I discussed with Paige stays between us.â You answer coldly, tugging at your wrist.
His hand tightens more, almost bruising. âYouâre bringing in that attitude of yours, when we were kind enough to think of you? To let you stick around our lives?"
Youâre sick of this narrative, of acting like you shouldâve been grateful they thought to include you into this sick little group from your past life as if they hadnât completely burnt it into flames.
âWalter, get your hands off before I shoveââ
A fist slams into the side of Walterâs face before you even have a chance to finish your sentence. Screams erupt from the crowd, or cheersâyou can barely tell because your eyes are locked onto Damian, whoâs grabbing Walter by the collar with chafed knuckles.
Multiple eyes are on them, but your own gaze is fixed on Damianâs expression, who has gone completely cold. Nearly murderous, and filled with uncontained wrath. His glare, almost deadly, is trained on his target in a way youâve never seen him before. The composed, distant Damianâis nowhere to be found.
"You stay away from her." Damian growls.
"What the hell, man!" Walter spits, blood sprayed over his nose. "Do you seriously think she's worthâ"
Damian drags him closer by the collar, and something inhuman flashes past his concentrated gaze. "She's worth more than you ever will dream of trying to be. You are nothing, and even daring to lay a hand on her is something you will pay for."
âDamian!â You shout.
That finally reaches him, past the simultaneous gawking and murmurs. Itâs as if heâs reentered his own body, and Damian immediately drops Walter to the ground with a loud thud. Walter lands embarrassingly on his bottom, and his entire face has gone red with shame.
His gaze switches to you, and his wrath fades immediately into concern. His eyes fall onto your bruising skin, and his emotions fall apart into something colder. You have a feeling if you donât get him out of this room, this fight may escalate into something much worse.
Pushing through the forming crowd, you reach out. âLetâs get out of here.â You plead, holding out your hand.
His gaze drops to your fingers, then back to the forming outline of a hand gripped around your wrist, and you see his calculating assessment. Damian leans lower, muttering something low into Walterâs ear. It is quick, but you see the way Walter completely freezes in placeâhis struggle evading from his body like a statue. When Damianâs eyes meet your frightened ones once more, he doesnât hesitate a second longer before grabbing your hand.
Damian doesn't waste time in leading you through the crowd, towards the exit and away from the escalating noiseâand into the night breeze. When the cold wind finally hits your skin, his hand remains firmly intertwined with yours as he guides you somewhere far awayâthe fact still lingers that Damian, perfect track record and Wayne prodigy, just punched someone for you.
âYou punched him.â You mutter faintly, seated at a bench youâve both found, crisp leaves surrounding you with the faint singing of crickets.
âHe was hurting you.â
âDamian, the whole schoolâs going to talk about this.â You stress. âYouâre going to get in trouble, possibly a suspension.â
His jaw clenches. âI am your partner.â
Damianâs agitated. Over the situation, despite there no longer being any witnesses to his supposed protection. His shoulders are tense, jaw clenched and his gazeâyou recall how he had looked at Walter when he landed that first hit, the pure anger that seized him.
âNot a real one.â
He flinches, as if struck, and you knew immediately that your words landed wrongly. His emotions topple over the other, and youâre unable to name any that arises before it all falls apart like his bodyâs regained consciousness. Concealed, and distant.
âMy mistake.â He mutters. âIâve forgotten my standing.â
âDamianââ
âI do not wish to inconvenience you.â He states, words leaving in a bitter rush. âI have overstepped, I realise that.â
âDamian.â You call out for the second time, fingers reaching for hisâand he finally breathes when your warmth seeps through his skin. Youâre relieved he doesnât pull away. âThat came out wrong. Iâm not mad you punched the jerk, I wouldâve done it myself. I am glad you stood up for me, but Iâm just confused on why you did it, because there's nothing at stake for you, only something to lose.â
His expression stiffens at the verbal admission of his visible frustration. This conversation sounds much too real, and the lines that have been carefully drawn are erasing themselves, leaving behind uncharted territory. One you werenât sure how to navigate.
âYou do matter to me, as more than a role.â You plead. âI donât want you to think youâre someone I chose out of convenience. Please donât believe that.â
His breath exhales low, controlled. His gaze flickers with the briefest uncertainty, and you realise how selfish youâve been. This arrangement had been perfect for you, that you simply assumed it was the same for him.
âNo, you are not at fault.â He mutters after a moment. âIt is not your responsibility to handle the consequence of my actions. We had agreed on no complications, and I have done exactly that.â
His jaw tightens, before he finally spits it out. âI punched him because the boundaries of what was was real or imagined between us has never made a difference to me. He had hurt you, not only physicallyââ His gaze shifts to your reddened wrist, and it darkens completely. ââbut he is a culprit to your existing pain. I was angry, because I couldnât comprehend that I was finally faced with the two morons who thought losing you was even a consideration, and to see them hold no remorse for it made me forget my place.â
âIâve always excelled in being what others expected of me.â He mutters. âWhen you approached me, it was the first time I had not wanted to be confined to a role. I did not want to partake in a façade, becauseâI had wanted your request to be for something real. Then, you mentioned that you picked me because I had not the slightest chance of falling for you. It was ironic, and I knew then that I should've rejected your request."
"But I started to earnestly believeâthat I could separate emotion and duty. I could be in your presence, and not feel the consequences if the arrangement endedâbecause nothing would be real.â
âTill I realisedâhow much it affected me to not have you truly at all.â He confesses. âI shouldâve been honest, that this arrangement had become the opposite of what weâve agreed upon. But I was afraid, of admitting that I wasnât capable of control, of driving you away."
âDamian." Your frown deepens. "Youâre not going to lose me.â
âI donât know.â He blurts honestly. âI do not know how to handle want. I am built of structure, of worth to prove why I deserve to keep my position, that has always been what Iâve provided. I do not know how to want without providing substance to covet a person.â
âBut I want you.â He exhales. âNot once has it been pretend for me, not when it had already existed before our arrangement. Every moment I reached for your hand, every time I checked that horrendous shaded calendar of yours. I rushed over the moment you went missing when you were sick, because I had wanted to look for you. I have never once hesitated in calling myself your partner, even knowing the role was temporary. I want you, in the real, complicated wayâthat I've failed in being what you needed me to be."
"That's not true." You break. "That's not what I need you to be at all, Damian."
He finally looks at you, a little less restrainedâand almost startled at your words.
"If you had been real about this the entire time, Damian, then so have I." You admit. "I chose you because I thought you wouldn't have fallen for me, that is trueâbut that is because I also thought it was safe because I knew I was going to fall for you."
"I wasn't kidding when I said I like you." You confess. "In all of the complicated, real sense of the word, and you were always going be the one I was going to choose. Even if you had said no, I wouldn't have asked anyone else. I wanted you from the start, Damian, and that hasn't changed. I was going to ask you at freaking Romeo's after this, if you wanted this to be real too."
The moment those words leave your lips, Damian closes in. His fingers tug you by your waist, his hand wrapping around the nape of your neck, and his lips are on yours. Damian Wayne, who still has forming bruises at his knuckles from a fight he landed in to defend you, is kissing you on a park bench in the middle of the nightâand you're not dreaming.
It's clearly his first, but there's something so tenderly sweet about it that your heart trembles uncontrollablyâenough to render something wet at your lashes by the time he's pulled back.
He pulls apart just to meet your gaze, and you've never seen him this relieved. "This is real." He restates, as if he can't quite truly believe it.
âWe did just have our first official fight.â You murmur, cheek pressed to his chest.
"Official." He hums in acknowledgement. "I like that."
Your smile teethers into something soft when you feel the soft press of his mouth against the shell of your ear. "Yeah, guess our operation tonight ended in a success."
likes, reblogs, and comments are highly appreciated! <333
warnings: explicit sexual content (18+), f!reader, unprotected sex, creampie kink, dirty talk (reader to clark), cum spreading, begging, orgasm control (barely), overstimulation, nsfw language + themes
âJust the tip,â youâd said, like that would somehow make a difference. Like it would undo the dozens of times heâd been deep inside you. On camera. Off camera. Bent over the couch. In the shower. The kitchen.
StillâClark had nodded.
Agreed.
The video opened with you already on your back, legs spread open for him like it was nothing new. His cock was hard, flushed, leaking, pressed right up against your entrance. That first little nudge. Just a tease. Just a taste.
Clark held the camera in one hand, the frame tight on the part that mattered mostâwhere he was thick and twitching, where you were wet and open. His other hand gripped his base hard, trying to keep himself from sliding in too far.
He had told himself itâd be easy, that it wasnât anything he hadnât done before on set. But what he miscalculated was you.
The way you looked laid out like that. The way you pulsed around the head of his cock. The way your voice hit when you started talking to him.
âThatâs it,â you said, soft and slow. âJust the tip, remember?â
He dragged back, inching out until just the swollen head caught at your opening, then pushed back in with a low groan.
You tilted your head back, eyes fluttering before landing right on him again. Your voice came low and smooth, made for the camera but aimed only at him.
âEven a little bit feels so good, doesnât it?â
Clark exhaled hard through his nose, the muscles in his arm flexing as he held himself back. His hand shifted slightly, adjusting the angle, making sure the camera caught everythingâthe mess between your thighs, the way you sucked him in like your body couldnât help it.
âYour cock looks so good like that,â you whispered, smiling as you pulsed around him again. âAll thick and red. You like that, donât you? You like watching it.â
He did. Too much.
Clark leaned back slightly, shifting for a cleaner view. His fingers slipped off his base until only two rested there to guide himâone on each side, just enough to keep himself steady. He moved slow at first, careful, the tip dragging through your heat in tight, teasing passes.
You reached down, fingers brushing his as you spread the slick between your bodies. You pressed in a little firmer, dragging it all the way down his shaft, coating him in it, fingertips gliding over every thick inch he was trying so hard not to bury inside you.Â
He groaned, quiet and raw. The kind that caught in the back of his throat.
His hips twitched and he slipped a little deeper, grunting at the feel of itâyour walls squeezing him tighter the second he sank past the head. He caught himself, pulled back fast, jaw tight.
Then did it again two strokes later.
He was trying. But every time you clenched, every time your body hugged him like that, it was like your pussy was trying to drag him all the way in.
He couldnât help it.
The pressure hit him all at once. His hips jerked, and he pulled back just enough for the first thick pulse to hit your clit, cum streaking across you. His voice got louder, less controlled, the sound scraping out of his chest before he slipped back in.
The slide was messy, wet with his release, and the noises coming from him were nothing but needâshort, rough breaths as his hips pressed forward again, chasing the feeling instead of stopping it. His hand dropped between you without thinking, fingers finding your clit, rubbing hard, spreading his cum everywhere as he worked you through it.
Your moans climbed, sharper, louder, each one catching higher in your throat.
He was still tryingâstill keeping himself right there at the edge, just the tip. But he was already gone. His cock kept nudging deeper, your body pulling him in before he could stop himself.
The tension sat between you, thick and obvious.
You felt it. He felt it. Neither of you said a word until you finally broke, the restraint snapping clean.
âClark,â you said, voice unsteady. âI want more. Give me more.â
You begged him for it, hips rocking up, hands gripping his wrist like you were trying to drag him in yourself.
âPlease.â
That did it.
Clark let out a low sound and gave up completely. He buried himself to the base and fucked you like he was made for it. Full strokes now. Deep. Filthy. His hand dug into your thigh, holding you open for him, keeping you exactly where he needed you.
Every time he bottomed out, it was a reminderââjust the tipâ had never really stood a chance. Not with you sounding like that, or how tight and hot you felt, or the way your body clung to him like you were trying to keep him there.
The camera was still rolling when it hit you. Your body arched, trembling, breath catching as you came around him, hard. He felt it. Watched it. The way your thighs shook. The way your cunt pulsed around his cock like you wanted more even as it wrecked you.
Clarkâs breath came rough, chest rising hard as he finally pulled out of you. He glanced down at the screen, then back at you, a crooked, knowing smile already forming.
âSo much for just the tip,â you whispered, still shaking from the way heâd left you.
He huffed out a breath, almost a laugh.
âMaybe weâll get it right next time.â
Š anon-188 - est. 2025 | all writing, layouts, and designs are my original content. please do not repost, copy, translate, or recreate my work in any form.
a/n: iâve had a killer headache for the past few days, so if this is a little off, just know i did my best đ i hope you still enjoy it! <3
summary: itâs the premiere for your debut movie. clark is there to support you from the sidelines. or, when clark kent almost reveals his true identity in a flash of protective induced anger when the paparazzi become aggressive with you. (wc: 4.5k)
pairing: clark kent / f!reader
content: established relationship. fluff. actress!reader. protective!clark. typical red carpet fiasco with the paparazzi. r wears a dress for the premiereâinspo is zendayaâs newest lookâbut no physical descriptions. 18+ smut (m. receiving, semi-public blowjob? mild exhibitionism and praise.) (1) swear word from clark.
The knock to the hotel door came twenty minutes prior to when you were due to walk the carpet. It was a distinct knock, five sharp, melodic raps against the wood that could be mistaken for something along the lines of morse code. It was protocolâof course. The debut premiere of a high profile movie adapted from the pages of millions of peopleâs most treasured story, the stakes could never be higher to ensure that the other person on the side of the door was not a human will ill-intent.Â
It came with the profession. Media consumers, movie buffs, locals disrupted by the chaos that a bunch of actors and their entourage brought to their city, werenât all going to be elated by the movie adaption.Â
You were never going to win; women never got to win.Â
So, the knocks were mandatory.Â
One of the many assistants that were collaborating for the initial get ready to go as smoothly and as on time as possible, crept to the door, cracking it open just a slither before their shoulders drop in reliefâbecause there was no use of brunt force or verbal abuse needed to the potential threat on the other side.Â
You are closer to the opposite side of the room with a team of hair, makeup and your most trusted confidant; your stylist, when the door opens and shuts with urgency. From where you are stood, you can see the red carpet beneath the building you were residing in and it had been cause for a brilliant distraction amidst the tugging and turning you had to endure to look the part.Â
Eventually, you turn your head to see your boyfriend approach you withâwhat you would call itâa shit-eating grin on his handsome features. Clark Kent is almost unrecognisable as he forgoes the frumpy, ill-fitting grey ensemble suit for his everyday work escapades at Daily Planet, and stands in all broad-shouldered excellence in a sleek suit that deliberately complimented the theme of your outfit.Â
It was subtle. Completely intentional. (The world had yet to unearth the privacy of your relationship, but that didnât mean Clark couldnât tease a declaration of possession with a suit.)Â
Your posture slumps with relief to see him.Â
âHey.â you breathe out, the team around you dispersing momentarily to allow you a moment with your remedial significant other.Â
Clark bends to press a featherlight kiss to your lipsâconscious enough to not ruin the perfected makeup look. âHi, sweetheart. You okay?â
âYeah, justââ you inhale and Clark copies, âânervous. Sort of.âÂ
Nervous was an understatement to how you felt. To be morbidly graphic, what you felt was close to the comparison of, if you had ingested flesh-eating maggots that had a craving for eating away at your vital organs. Especially your stomach.Â
Nervous was just a more eloquent way of expressing that.Â
It was to be expected. The movie that you had been working on amongst some of the top-dogs of the theatre industry, was also your introductory film. It took close to two years of filming, hundreds of repetitive script-readsâwith Clark has your practice partnerâand endless but intermittent travelling to locations to capture the true essence of a backdrop for a scene. This movie, with a director that was renowned across the globe, would change the trajectory of your life within this business you were so passionate to be apart of.Â
The premiere was another ominous entity entirely.Â
In simpler terms: this is where the public scrutiny came into play.Â
Clarkâs face fills with empathy, âI know. Itâs a big deal for you.â he rubs circles into the pulse point on your wrist, âYou deserve the recognition. Everything else is just outside noise. Alright?âÂ
âRight.â you give a curt nod, âI do deserve this.âÂ
âIâll be right there with you. Wellâbehind you, not in shotâŚjust with your assistant. Away from the limelight.â Clark mulls the positioning of his standpoint on the red carpet, âGolly. You know what I mean.âÂ
You let out an airy laugh, âThank you, baby. I really appreciate you being here.âÂ
Clark pecks your glossy lips again with a smile, before taking the opportunity to stand back on his heel to appreciate the work your team had put into the creation that moulds to the curves your body. It was a craftâthe art form that spoke through the visuals of fabric against the human form. The team that remains devoted to you to this day have completely encapsulated the aesthetics on par with the movie; as if they shook the script and you fell out wearing a divine masterpiece.Â
He could appreciate the concept pieced together on your body. He would appreciate that you brought it to life, even more.Â
Clarkâs hands smooth down your forearms, his face melding into that of a man on a ledge of delaying the entire premiere process. Brows in a pinch, a low hum rumbles from his chest as he drinks up your external beauty.
You tuck your chin to your shoulder because, even after a year and some change with the bumbling journalistâand true Kryptonian behind closed doorsâClark still manages to conjure up some shyness from the depths of your core.Â
âYou lookâŚangelic.â Clark speaks in a barely audible tone.Â
You look down at your frame, âThat was the prompt. This dress was put on hold from the runway for two yearsâCan you believe that?â your eyes shine with excitement when you look back up.Â
âThey made the right decision, honey.â Clark muses, happy to keep your spirits up before the anxiety seeps in from the corners.Â
âYou look handsome.â you redirect, voice dripping in saccharine. You subject your team to the ooey-gooey tempo pouring from the bubble you found yourself in with Clark. You smooth your hands down his chest, âI like your suit. You suit this cream colour.â
âYesâWell, I thought I could match in some way.â Clark mumbles, pink from praise. His fingers dip into the breast pocket, pulling out a pair of golden-frame sunglasses. âI made these.âÂ
You pluck the sunglasses to inspect the plexiglass. âThe same as your others?âÂ
(It was an attempt to be as discreet as possible in a room full of listeners. For all they knew, your significant other had a passion project of making sunglasses.)Â
Clark nods happily and you express your amazement through the subtlety of facial expressionsâtrying hard not to draw too much attention to raise questions from the others. He takes the glasses from you, angling his body away momentarily to exchange the signature frames for the newly designed ones.Â
He turns back, dimples prominent with the shades now adorning his face.Â
âOoh.â you chirp, âAre you sure you donât want to walk the carpet?â
âThatâs all you, honey.â Clark ensures as he laps up your fawning over him.Â
Your publicist finds a moment of reprieve in between the flirtations between you two, signalling that the final touch ups can be made in the short car ride to the venue. Clark breathes with you when the apprehension returns in shudders of air from your lips, his reassurance quiet as he gathers your skirts to ensure your walk to your assigned vehicle is as undisrupted as possible.Â
The elevator ride from the tenth floor doesnât last long enough for you, and suddenly youâre struggling into the backseat of the car with the tinted windowsâClark prompt to step up and help you into the seat with his hand at your hip. Once youâre awkwardly settled, the dress preventing as much fluid movement as usual, Clark ducks his head when you place a hand to his jaw to tug him in for one final kiss; before the relationship was placed behind a thin veil and away from prying eyes.Â
Then itâs you, your stylist and your thoughts.Â
Clark is in the car following behind yours. He has your publicist talking in his ear about the protocol to be strictly followed once on the carpet. Sheâs essentially the brains of the operations that happen under everyoneâs starry-eyed infatuation with the stars of the movie. She talks of the interview triages assessed prior to this moment, where you need to be an opportunist with popular media outlets, the strict schedule to help you flow through the process with minimal overtime with interviewers.Â
âItâll be hard not to step in.â she says in regard to parasite that were the paparazzi, âThatâs my job. I know the cues, the questions that arenât to be asked. Just be there as background support. Sheâs nervous.âÂ
âOf course.â Clark agrees with zero protest.
This was beyond the cushioned comfort of Daily Planet, or in the skies as the protector of Metropolisâor wherever heâs needed. Clark was out of his depth with all the glamour, besides the handful of times he had attended the Metropolis Gala still in civilian clothing.Â
Even taking all of this taken into consideration, the event was about you, and your co-stars no less; but you. That meant Clark had to chew on his feelings and relinquish his protective streak to allow the professionals to do the job they had been employed to do.Â
Take care of you in the spotlight.Â
And, for the most part, they do.Â
As soon as youâre out of the car, your publicist doesnât let you out of her sight. Even with the blinding flashes coming from the bulbs in the plethora of cameras, she never loses you in the swarm of desperate hands waving posters for signatures. When the time tiptoes on, she is the one to give your elbow a light tap and you move along.Â
Clark watches you in awe from the sidelines. The fluidity in which you manage to maintain as you manoeuvre from interacting with fans to snappy interviews with various different media outlets, is genuinely admirable.
From an insiderâs perspective, Clark couldnât help but show his bias. You werenât a hard person to fall in love with. He finds himself falling deeper everyday. So, it made complete sense the way strangers would practically fall to their knees in reverence the moment you turned your attention in their direction.Â
(Clark was just privileged enough to be able to take you home. Whereas, these people didnât.)Â
Eventuallyâafter the red carpet photos, interviews and fan interactionsâyou make it into a more communal, but still public, area with all the co-stars of the movie, and where the paparazzi also begin to spill into the edges of the carpet; without as much as a barrier to hold them back.Â
Despite this, the photographers had been told on numerous occasions that this was an intermission to allow to actors to breathe for a minute. Therefore, photos were to be put on hold until the group photos of all the people starring in the movie were to take place.Â
âYou okay?â Clark checks in when you finally come to a stop.Â
âPhewâYeah. This is pretty intense. Do you think Iâm doing okay?â you look up at him all twinkly-eyed, your pupils dilated from a mixture of strong affection and the adrenaline from the event.Â
Clark, without much thought, rubs the nape of your neck, âYouâre a natural, sweetheart.âÂ
You lean into his touch. (He refrains from pressing a to kiss your temple. Or anywhere on your face.)Â
âHow are you feeling?â you ask whilst you take Clarkâs hand into yours to absentmindedly play with it.Â
âIâm happy.â Clark chirps, âHappy to be part of this moment with you.âÂ
You tilt your chin, humming in contentâClark Kent was a man who knew how to love. âYouâre sweet. We just have some group photos and then weâre inside to introduce the film. We arenât obligated to stay after that.â
âYou donât want to watch it?âÂ
âI do! I just have this idea in my head on how Iâll watch it. You know, when itâs released to the public. You, me and our friends can go to the Metro to watch it.â you beam at the idea of sharing your moment with your close ones; and as an extension, Clarkâs close friends too.Â
Clark wants to kiss you. You can see it in the way his tongue pokes out to wet his lips. Behind the tinted shades, blue eyes are pinned to your lips as the end goal. He gives you a handsome smile, hungry for some public display of affection but is aware of the boundaries in place.Â
This was your moment. He didnât want any kiss to detract from that in the newspapers the next morning.Â
The tension is palpable, because your relationship has always been pretty handsy. Anywhere you went together, there was always a hand placed on a hip, a kiss pressed to the back of a hand or a peck to the lips when you found the time. To have the restraint to not flaunt the love shared between you two, was a talent in its own.Â
(That didnât mean the ride back had to be cuffed to the self-control too.)Â
Even so, you still found yourself fiddling with Clarkâs hand, stepping into him as you waited around for the signal for the group photos.Â
Itâs only when a few bulb flashes spark in your peripheral, that you drop the gentle affection.Â
Your publicist is first to step in. âThereâs no photos to be taken here. If you make your way round to the podium, the group photos will be held there.â she announces it clear and conciselyâso there shouldnât be any confusion.Â
âYeah. Yeah.â a male with an expensive camera drawls.Â
You turn back and pull a face at Clark, âThereâs always one, huh?âÂ
Clark offers a smile reserved only for you.Â
The flash goes off again.Â
âExcuse meââ your publicist steps up to the same male, ââDid I not make it clear enough? This is a no photography zone. Go round to the podium, or I will call security.âÂ
The pap chuckles and lifts his lens to snap another candid photo of you. âLet me do my fuckinâ job, lady.âÂ
âHey!â Clark moves toward your publicist to defend her. His face contorts into frustration, âEveryone has a job to do here. Letâs be respectful of that.âÂ
âShut the fuck up, dude.â
Clarkâs nostrils flare, âDonât be such a jerk, buddy.âÂ
The man scoffs at Clarkâs polite insult.Â
âThis your guy?â he snorts, thumbing in Clarkâs direction whilst he stares at you.Â
You also step into the space where the minor conflict was beginning to arise. Media trained down to the bone, you were aware of how to keep composure whilst trying to snuff out the growing tensions amongst ravenous paparazzi that will do anything for a front page image.Â
Silence follows you, ignoring the provocation from the paparazzi.Â
Your hand comes to rest on Clarkâs forearm as he stares down the bald-headed man who was sneering back at him. He could feel the thrum of the pulse quickening in his neck but yields all the same. Your publicist gives him a grateful nod, all three of you turning your backs to weave through the rest of the people that congregated on the carpet.Â
Itâs the step to the side, and behind your publicistâto check in with herâthat induces a blur of aggression.Â
The belligerent paparazzi male makes himself an opportunist to the vulnerability in having your back turned. Unsatisfied with the limited images he has taken of you, his hand outstretches and he dictates your movement with a hand yanking at your bicep.Â
It makes you yelp from the unexpectedness of it. His intentions are rough and youâre pulled from your publicist.Â
You attempt to shake him offâhis fingers curling deeper into your flesh. âGet off of me!âÂ
âHell no. I need one good fucking photoââ his demands are cut short when Clark comes up from behind you, grabbing the camera in the paparazziâs grasp and crushing it into smithereens beneath his foot. âAre you fucking kidding me?âÂ
âShe said get off of her.â Clark sizes the guy up, a couple of inches taller, âNo one takes photos here. You heard the rules.âÂ
âClarkââÂ
âNo, fuck you!â The guy points a finger in Clarkâs face, âAnd fuck this nobody bitch!â Â
A shade of red blinds Clarkâs vision as he takes the fabric of the manâs shirt into his fingers, his teeth bared as he sends him a couple of feet into the crowd of paparazzi standing idleâall observing the ordeal before they became part of it. Luckily for the bald-headed pap, Clark had only mustered up a slither of his strength to send him backwards; so it wasnât as evident that he contained the power to have his body flung to the other end of the street.
You stop Clark from following the path in which he tossed the man like a rag-doll, seeing as his point had been well and truly proven. His eyes remain where a few people have bent at the knee to check for any injuries on the male.
A single flash goes off.Â
âCome on.â you mumble, your fingers intertwine with Clarkâs as you tug him behind you with your linked hands flush against your back.Â
Clark feels the visceral anger water down to dread whilst he walks, the guilt rising like bile in his throat as you guide him away. âIâm sorry, honey. Iâve ruined this for you.âÂ
âThese things happen.â you speak over your shoulder, straining a smile to onlookers, âYou didnât ruin anything. It was about time these paps get put in their place.âÂ
âAre you hurt?â he asks worriedly.Â
You shake your head as you come to a stop, your publicist beside you already on the phone. âPeachy.â you fix the lapel of his suit, âYou need to be careful what youâre showing off here. They are here to provoke us, to get a headlineânegative or not.âÂ
âI know, I justâcouldnât stand back and let that happen.â Clark pouts, âYouâve worked so hard to get here. I feel terrible.âÂ
âHeyââ you coo, placing a hand to his cheek to raise his eyes back up to yours. You smile warmly, ââNothing is ruined. We might get a hospital bill in the mailâŚbut itâll be okay. We just have to keep rolling with the punches.âÂ
Clark nods along as your publicist approaches. With security already on the way to escort the aggressive instigator out of the venue, she advises that the group photos will be nextâhowever the time for it cut short as it seems that a few more of your co-stars have reached the same fate with the paparazzi.Â
She ushers you away, and Clark stands with his hands clasped at his front as he watches you stand amongst the A-listers to get your photo taken.Â
Youâre a vision. Again, this could be Clarkâs bias rearing its head, but he thought you stood out from the team. A different type of glow from stardom around you.Â
âYouâre a lucky guy.â your publicist muses quietly as she stands shoulder to shoulder with Clark.Â
âI know.â Clark inhales to fill the air that has escaped his lungs from watching you. âSheâs one of a kind.âÂ
âHm.â she hums, âAnything we should be keeping under wraps from the tabloids?â she leans in to refrain from the conversation bleeding out into the eavesdroppers in surrounding areas.Â
The tips of Clarkâs ears tinge with pink at the thought of an upcoming proposal he had in the works.Â
Clark chuckles, âSoon. Iâll let you know.âÂ
âWellâyou have my email.âÂ
The group photos are wrapped up instantaneously, and you are back within Clarkâs grasp. You introduce him to a few of the co-stars he had missed the day he visited you onset, and he spends most of his time talking about you rather than being complimentary to their extensive work in the industry.Â
A few of them check on you after the altercation with the paparazzi and Clark keeps a firm hand on your back. (All previous notions of subtlety are gone with the wind.)Â
The whole team filter into the venue, away from the cameras and reporters which invites a unified sigh of reliefâpostures less straight, shoulders rounded, genuine personalities beginning to peek through.Â
Thereâs a fifteen minute wait before you are required to assist in introducing the film to the audience within the theatre. Your publicist finds you a room to sit in, with some refreshments on the table whilst you await to be called.
âIâll give you a knock when you are neededâ. she says before shutting the door, leaving you and Clark alone for the first time in, well, a few hours.Â
His hands come to smooth across your hips, head nuzzling into your neck as he breathes in your scent; sending goosebumps up your spine. You bend slightly to allow him to apply minimal weight against your body with his, with your arms snaking around his neck to keep you balanced.Â
Clark presses a few innocent kisses to your pulse-point.Â
He lifts his head from your neck and gives you a lopsided smile before dipping to kiss you properly. Thereâs a sigh of content from both parties as you lean into the kiss, lapping up all the missed opportunities to display this kind of affection with him.Â
You pull away first, âI really appreciate you being here today.âÂ
Clark is hungrily staring at your lipsâhis brows pinched with need. âAnything for you, sweetheart.âÂ
âI also appreciate how you stuck up for my publicist.â you kiss him again, âAnd for me.â you move your kisses from his lips, to his cheek and then onto his neck. âLet me show you how much gratitude I have.âÂ
âHoneyââ Clark grips onto your hips as you suck at his neck, ââWe donât have time.âÂ
Your hand travels south, âPlease?âÂ
âGosh, sweetheart.â Clark whimpers when your hand palms at the outline of his cock. His shaft twitches from the pressure youâre applying. âDarn it.âÂ
You grin wickedly and in a blink of an eye, youâre on your knees in front of him. Fingers making light work of his trousers, Clark tucks his chin to watch you peel his boxers downward; allowing his already hard cock to spring free, slapping against his suit jacket.Â
The slit is seeping and you waste little time by pressing your tongue against it.Â
âDo you know how sexy it was? Watching you throw that man for me?â you whisper with your lips pressed to his shaft. You flatten your tongue against the hot skin, dragging it upward to lick at his pink head again. âI love it when you get protective.âÂ
âUh-huh.â Clark whines as his head falls back. His fingers curl around the air in front of him; knowing he cannot touch you as it would ruin the look your team had spent hours perfecting for this premiere.Â
âWe have to be quick, okay?âÂ
Clark squeezes his eyes shut. âHoney, I wonât last long. I promise.âÂ
You hum before taking him into your mouth. One hand at the base of his cock, you begin to pump him into your mouthâthe other hand balancing against his muscular thigh. Easing him inch by inch, you feel him twitch against your tongue until the tip of his head is close to the back of your throat.Â
Clark bites down on a knuckle to muffle the guttural moan he lets out. He peels one eye open to see you begin to bob your head back and forth, saliva gathering around his shaft, making it as a substitute for lube as you jerk him off with your hand.
You take a second to look up at him, eyes gleaming with your mouth stuffed full. Clark feels his hips shift, and you whine with pleasure as he begins to gently thrust into your mouth.Â
âJust like that, honey.â he grunts, âYou are doing so well.âÂ
âMhm.â you mumble, sending vibrations all the way to his tight balls. Your eyes shift to the clock on the wall behind Clarkâs head.Â
8 minutes.
You pick up the pace, gagging each time Clarkâs tip hits the back of your throat. You let him use you, relaxing your mouth as he desperately ruts into you, chasing his climax. Both hands are now curled around his thighs to keep you in place, eyes watering, the room now filling with the ambient noises of Clark sloppily fucking your mouth.Â
Clark is verbalising his pleasure in babbles, ensuring that youâre comfortable with the pace heâs thrusting into your mouth at. He can feel the coil tighten in his stomach as he attempts to push back the worry from being caught by your publicistâor anyone who takes a moment to take a peek into the room.Â
âHoney, IâmâIâm close.â he whimpers pathetically. His cheeks are rosy, sweat clinging to his fallen curls. âShould I cum in my hand?âÂ
You shake your head.Â
âIn your mouth?â you nod and Clark feels the explicit word on the tip of his tongue, âFuck. I love you.âÂ
His words go straight to your core.Â
With his thrusts beginning to stutter and you brace yourself as he punches his cock into your throat. Clarkâs whole body tenses up, his hands coming to clamp over his mouth as he releases hot ropes onto your tongue and down your throat.Â
Some of it spills out from the corners of your mouth, and you swallow as much of it as you can whilst Clark pulses against your tongue.Â
You look up to see his chest heaving, teeth marks bitten into the skin of his hand.Â
After thirty seconds of him slowly softening, you release him from your mouth with a quiet pop. Satisfied, you grin up at him, chin wet with a sheen of your own salvia.Â
Clark wipes it with his thumb, bringing it to his mouth to taste.Â
You stand from your knees and press a wet kiss against his pink lips. âDid I get the message across?âÂ
âLoud and clear.âÂ
You laugh softly as Clark bends to pull his trousers back up. âAnd with five minutes to spare. Thatâs a record.âÂ
âYesâWell, considering the circumstances. We got lucky.â Clark grumbles, feeling hot with a newfound embarrassment.Â
As you begin to retort a smart-mouthed comment, a handful of knocks in a recognisable sequence hit against the other side of the door. You both straighten as the door opens to reveal your publicistâneither of you acting any sort of casual.Â
She speaks as you both shift on your feet, âTheyâre rounding up everyone now.âÂ
âOkay.â you smooth the front of your dress and let out a sigh whilst feigning innocence to the dressing room escapades you had just partaken in.Â
She looks you up and down as you approach. ââŚWe need to fix your makeup.âÂ
Clark barely manages to conceal the striking shade of red that covers the entirety of his face.Â
Grateful for his tinted sunglasses, Clark doesnât look the woman in the eye for the rest of the night.
Summary: After the Battle of the Gullet, Prince Jacaerys Velaryon should be dead, instead, he washes ashore on a mysterious island, where a lonely woman nurses him back to health. As the days pass, Jace finds himself falling in love with his beautiful savior.
CW: The relationship contains themes of coercion, emotional dependency, and captivity. SMUT
Genre: Dark Fantasy
AN: First Jace fic! Different from what i usually write, comments are appreciated!
WC: 26K
He should be dead.
The last thing he remembered with any coherence was the sky, a sky choked with smoke and screaming. Beneath that memory lay only fractured images that swam behind his closed eyelids, fragments of chaos that refused to assemble into anything whole.
Vermax.
The name pierced through the darkness like a blade. His dragon. His beautiful, loyal Vermax, who had hatched from an egg placed in his cradle when he was nothing more than a squalling babe with a tuft of dark hair that already marked him as different from his silver-haired mother. Vermax had shrieked as the grappling hooks tore into his wings, as the Triarchy ships surrounded them, as the sea rose up to swallow them both.
Jaceâs chest seized, he remembered the impact. He remembered the bone-shattering crash as Vermax slammed into the churning waters of the Gullet, and he remembered the dragonâs terrified, agonized roar. That sound had carried more than pain. It had carried something that felt like betrayal, as if Vermax could not understand why the sky had abandoned them. The cold of the sea had been absolute, salt water flooding his mouth, his throat, his lungs.
He had surfaced somehow. He had gasped and choked and reached for something, a piece of wreckage or a shattered mast, though the memory refused to sharpen. The waves had tossed him like a childâs toy. Through the spray and the smoke, the first bolt had taken him in the shoulder. The second had buried itself in his side, just beneath the ribs. The third was a blank space in his memory, a sensation his mind had simply refused to record.
What remained was the feeling that followed. A slow, spreading numbness. The way his limbs had stopped obeying him. The way the sky had tilted and spun, grey and gold and red bleeding together like watercolors on parchment. His last conscious thought had not been of his mother, nor of his brothers, nor of duty or the Iron Throne or the war that was tearing the realm apart. It had been of Vermax.
Iâm sorry. Iâm sorry. Iâm sorry.
â
He woke to the glow of candlelight, the light came from dozens of candles, the air smelled of salt and something else, something green and living. Herbs, perhaps, or flowers. It was an earthy smell, a growing smell, utterly unlike the smoke and blood and terror that had filled his nostrils before the darkness took him.
Jace tried to move, and his body screamed in protest. Every muscle, every joint, every inch of skin felt like an open wound packed with burning coals. Pain lanced through his shoulder, his side, his ribs. He sucked in a sharp breath through clenched teeth, and even that small motion sent fire racing down his spine.
âYou shouldnât move.â
The voice was soft and female, carrying an accent he had never heard before. The vowels were rounder than he was used to, the cadence lilting and unfamiliar, Jace turned his head slowly, every vertebra in his neck protesting, and saw you.
You were kneeling beside the bed, on a cushion of deep blue silk, and you were looking at him with an expression of such open relief that Jace forgot, for a moment, how to breathe.
You were beautiful in a way that had nothing to do with the powdered faces and elaborate hairstyles of court ladies. You wore no jewelry, no rings, no gems at your throat. Your dress, if it could even be called that, was unlike anything he had ever seen, layers of fabric in pale ivory and soft gold that had been draped rather than tailored. The cut left your arms bare, and the neckline was wide and flowing. It was clothing from a warmer world entirely, bearing no resemblance to the heavy velvets and structured bodices of Westeros.
âYouâre awake,â you said, and your smile was like dawn breaking over still water. âI was beginning to fear you wouldnât open your eyes again.â
Jace opened his mouth to speak, all that came out was a dry, rasping croak. His throat felt as though it had been scoured raw.
You reached for a clay cup beside you, glazed deep blue, and lifted it to his lips with a careful hand. âDrink. Slowly. Youâve been without water for a long time.â
The water was cool and impossibly clean. It slid down his throat like mercy. He drank until you pulled the cup gently away, your expression soft but firm.
âI said slowly. Your body has been through a great ordeal.â Jace sagged back against the furs, his breath coming in shallow gasps. Even drinking had exhausted him. He could feel the heat radiating from his own skin, a fever burning beneath the surface. âWhereâŚâ His voice was barely a whisper, cracked and ruined. âWhere am I?â
You set the cup aside. âMy home. I found you on the shore.â
He tried to form another question, but his thoughts were slipping away from him like water through fingers. The shore. The battle. The arrows.
âYour body was full of arrows,â you said quietly, as if you had followed the path of his scattered thoughts. âYou looked dead. I do not know how you survived.â A pause. âBut I am glad you did.â
Jace stared at you, his vision blurring and sharpening in turns. The candles made halos around your silhouette. The cave walls curved around you both like cupped hands. He lay in a bed of soft furs with clean linen bandages wrapped around his chest and shoulder. The space around him was strange, a blend of cave stone and polished wood and silk cushions.
He tried to focus on you again, on your strange dress and your unfamiliar accent and the way you looked at him without the calculating gaze of a courtier. Your expression held only simple, unguarded relief.
âYouâŚâ he started, but the words crumbled before he could shape them. He was so tired. The heat in his blood was growing worse, sweat beading on his forehead despite the cool air of the cave.
âShh.â You leaned closer and pressed a cool cloth to his brow. Your touch was impossibly gentle. âYou have a fever. The arrows were laced with something, I think. A poison, or something like it. It will take time to burn it out.â
Jaceâs eyes fluttered. The cool cloth was a mercy, and your hand was steady against his skin.
âWhere is this island?â he managed, the question barely a whisper. âHow far from the battleâŚâ
You shook your head, a small and quiet movement. âThis is my island. That is all that matters now. You are here, and you are safe.â Your hand brushed the dark, sweat-soaked curls back from his forehead. âYou are my guest. I will take care of you.â
He should have questioned you. He should have demanded to know where he was, who you were, how any of this was possible. He was a prince, raised on suspicion, trained to trust no one. But the fever was burning through him, and you were so calm, so steady, and your hands were so gentle, and he was so gods-damned tired.
âRest,â you murmured. âYou are not strong enough to stay awake. But you will be. In time.â
Jaceâs eyes closed against his will. The darkness pulled at him, soft and warm. The last thing he felt was the cool cloth on his forehead and the gentle weight of your hand smoothing his hair back from his face.
âSleep, Jace,â you whispered.
â
The days blurred together like watercolors left in the rain, Jace measured time by the changing quality of light that filtered through the cave's entrance, a distant glow that brightened and dimmed in a rhythm he slowly came to recognize. Morning, afternoon, evening, night. The cycle repeated itself over and over. He could not see the sky from his bed, only the rough stone ceiling and the flickering candles and, whenever he turned his head, the soft silhouette of you moving through the chamber.
You were always there, that was the first thing he truly understood once the fever broke and his mind began to piece itself back together. You were always there. When he woke gasping from nightmares of Vermax screaming, the arrows striking, the water closing over his head, you were beside him with your cool hand on his forehead and your voice murmuring words he could not quite catch but that soothed him anyway. When the pain in his wounds flared hot and unbearable, you were there with the medicine, spooning bitter liquid past his cracked lips and following it with cool water to wash away the taste. When the fever spiked and he thrashed in the furs, soaked in sweat and half-delirious, you were there with cloths dipped in cold water, pressing them to his chest, his neck, his brow.
He did not know how you slept. He did not know when you ate. He only knew that every time he opened his eyes, you were somewhere nearby, kneeling beside his bed or mixing herbs at the stone table or simply sitting on your silk cushion with your hands folded in your lap, watching the candles burn.
âYou donât have to stay,â he rasped one night, though it might have been day for all he could tell the difference. His voice was still weak and still cracked, but it no longer hurt to speak. âYou must have other things to do.â
You looked up from the bowl you were mixing, and your lips curved into that soft, patient smile he was beginning to recognize. âI have nothing more important than keeping you alive, Jace. That is a full-time occupation, it seems.â
He wanted to argue, but exhaustion pulled him back under before he could form the words, the fever broke on what might have been the fifth day, or the sixth, or the seventh. He had lost count.
He woke drenched in sweat, his hair plastered to his forehead and the furs kicked to the foot of the bed, but his head was clear. For the first time since he had opened his eyes in this cave, his thoughts were not swimming in a haze of heat and pain. He could feel the wounds in his shoulder and side, still tender and still healing, but they no longer burned with the sharp, insistent fire of infection.
He was alive. He was going to stay alive, and that meant he had to get back.
His mother. His brothers. The war. Every day he spent lying in this bed was another day the Blacks fought without him, another day his family believed him dead, another day the Greens advanced their stolen throne. He had to get stronger. He had to return to Westeros.
âYour thoughts are very loud.â Jace turned his head. You were sitting on your cushion beside the bed, a piece of fabric in your hands and a needle moving in small, precise stitches. He had no idea how long you had been there. He had not even noticed you.
âMy thoughts?â he repeated, his voice hoarse but steadier than before.
âYou are frowning at the ceiling as though it has offended you.â You did not look up from your sewing, but there was a hint of amusement in your voice. âI assume you are planning your escape.â
Jace blinked. âI was not planning an escape. I was only thinking about how to leave.â
âThat is the same thing.â
âIt is absolutely not the same thing.â Now you did look up, one eyebrow raised, and Jace felt his face warm. He had walked directly into that.
âYou want to go back,â you said, and your voice was quieter now, the teasing edge softened into something more serious. âIt is natural. You have people waiting for you. A family. A war, perhaps, judging by the state of you when I found you.â You returned your attention to your stitching. âI understand.â
He was quiet for a moment, watching your hands move. The fabric you were working on was pale blue, the stitches neat and even. You were making him more bandages, he realized.
âYes,â he admitted finally. âI have to go back. My family needs me. They probably think I am dead.â
âThen we will work to make you strong enough to leave.â You bit off the thread with your teeth, smooth and practiced. âBut you cannot rush it. The wounds are healing well, but if you push too hard, too fast, you will undo all my hard work. And I have worked very hard, Jace.â
There was something almost stern in your tone, and despite himself, he felt the corner of his mouth twitch upward. âI would not dream of undoing your hard work.â
âGood.â You set the sewing aside and rose to your feet, your gossamer skirts rustling softly against the stone floor. âYou have been lying in that bed for days. I think it is time you tried to sit up properly. Do you think you can manage it?â
Jace took a breath. His shoulder throbbed. His side ached. But the fever was gone, and his head was clear, and he was so gods-damned tired of lying flat on his back.
âYes,â he said. âI think I can.â It was harder than he had expected.
His muscles had atrophied during the days of fever and stillness. His arms shook when he pushed himself up, and the wound in his side pulled sharply, and by the time he was sitting upright against the carved headboard, he was breathing hard and sweating again. But he was sitting. He was upright. He was looking at the cave from a new angle, and it was strange and wonderful and disorienting all at once.
âThere,â you said, and you were smiling now, truly smiling, something brighter than the gentle curve of lips he had grown used to. âThat was not so terrible, was it?â
âTerrible,â Jace managed, still catching his breath. âAbsolutely terrible.â
âBut you did it.â
He looked at you, at the way the candlelight caught the strange color of your eyes, and he found himself almost smiling back. âI did it.â
â
The days that followed fell into a pattern, you would help him sit up in the mornings, propping him against the headboard with pillows and furs. You would change his bandages, your fingers quick and efficient, your touch never lingering longer than necessary but never cold or impersonal either. You would bring him food, strange fruits he had never tasted before, sweet and tangy, and a porridge made from some grain he did not recognize, and fresh water that tasted cleaner than anything he had ever drunk in his life.
And you would talk about small things, the weather on the island, the herbs you used in your medicines, the fish you caught in the tidal pools below the cliffs. You had a dry, quiet sense of humor that surprised him, and a way of tilting your head when you were thinking that he found himself watching for.
In return, he told you things about himself. He was still a prince, still trained in caution, and so he held back the details that mattered most. But he told you about Dragonstone, about the volcanic rock and the sea winds and the dragons that wheeled in the sky. He told you about his brothers, careful to speak of them in the present tense even though Luke was-even though Luke had become something he could not yet say aloud.
He told you other things instead. That he missed the sea. That he had never been good at dancing. That his mother had taught him to read when he was four years old, and he had been so proud that he had carried the book around for a week straight, showing it to anyone who would look.
You laughed at that, a real laugh, bright and surprised, as if you had not expected him to say something so ordinary. âA week?â
âI was very proud of myself.â
âI can imagine. A little prince with his book, demanding that everyone admire his genius.â
âI did not demand. I simply made strong suggestions.â
âThat is the same thing.â
âIt is absolutely not the same thing, and I will not have my diplomatic skills insulted.â
You laughed again, and Jace realized with a jolt of surprise that he liked making you laugh. It was a good sound, your laugh, unstudied and unguarded, the sound of someone who spent too much time alone and had forgotten to be self-conscious about joy.
You were his only companion. His caretaker. His only visitor.
He had not seen another person even once in all the days he had been lying in this bed. No one came to the cave. No one called your name from outside. No one brought supplies or messages or news. It was only you, always you, appearing and disappearing through the winding passages of the cave system with the quiet confidence of someone who knew every stone by heart.
He had not asked about other people. It felt rude, somehow, when you were taking care of him and feeding him and changing his bandages and sitting beside him through the long, fevered nights. To ask about the absence of others would have sounded like an accusation, as though your company were insufficient, as though he had grown bored of you.
So he did not ask, but the question sat in the back of his mind, growing heavier with each passing day.
â
The day he walked for the first time was the day everything began to shift.
It was morning, the pale silver light filtering through the distant cave entrance, and you had just finished changing his bandages. The wounds were healing well, the flesh knitting together into angry red scars that would fade to white in time. You told him he would have a collection of them, a constellation across his shoulder and ribs. He said he would wear them with pride. You called him ridiculous.
âToday,â you announced, rising to your feet and brushing off your skirts, âyou are going to walk.â
Jace looked up at you. âWalk.â
âYes. Walk. Put one foot in front of the other. I assume you knew how to do it before you arrived here.â
âI knew how to walk.â
âThen today you will remember.â
It was harder than sitting up. It was harder than anything he had done since waking in this cave. His legs felt as though they belonged to someone else, weak and unsteady, the muscles wasted from days of lying still. You had to help him, your arm around his back and his arm across your shoulders, bearing some of his weight even though he tried very hard not to let you. You were smaller than him and slighter, and he was terrified of crushing you.
âYou will not crush me,â you said, as if reading his thoughts. âI am stronger than I look. Stop trying to hold yourself up with pride alone and lean on me.â
He leaned on you, by the time he had taken five steps across the chamber, his legs were shaking and sweat was dripping down his face. But he had walked. Five steps. Then ten. Then, a few days later, he crossed the entire chamber without help, his hand braced against the wall and his breath coming hard and fast.
And the day after that, you smiled at him and said, âI think it is time you saw the sun.â
The cave system was a maze, Jace knew, that your home was larger than the single chamber where he had been lying. He had seen you disappear down passages and emerge from different directions, had caught glimpses of other rooms, a kitchen carved into the rock, a storage chamber lined with jars and barrels, a space where water trickled down the wall into a natural basin. But he had not grasped the full scale of it until you led him through it yourself.
The passages twisted and turned, branching off into side tunnels and dead ends. Some were narrow, barely wide enough for a single person to squeeze through. Others opened into wide chambers with high ceilings, lit by candles placed in alcoves and by thin shafts of daylight that pierced down through cracks in the rock. The walls were rough in some places and smooth in others, worn down by time and water and the patient labor of whoever had carved this place.
âDid you build all this?â Jace asked, his voice echoing strangely in the stone corridors. He was walking slowly, one hand on the wall for balance, but he was walking.
You glanced back at him. âThe caves were here long before me. I only furnished them.â
âYou furnished them very well,â he muttered, stepping around a carved wooden chest that would not have looked out of place in a merchantâs manse.
âI had time.â
That was all you said, as if it explained everything. As if it explained anything at all.
The light grew brighter as you walked, the grey-silver of filtered daylight giving way to a warm golden glow. Jace could smell the outside now, salt air and flowers and something green and growing. His heart beat faster. He had been underground for so long that he had almost forgotten what the sky looked like.
Then you stepped through the cave entrance, and he followed you, and the world opened up around him.
It was beautiful, there was no other word for it, no word that could possibly capture what Jace saw as he stood at the mouth of the cave, blinking in the sudden brightness, his eyes struggling to adjust after so many days of candlelight and shadow.
The island spread out before him like something from a dream, the cliffs where the cave was carved dropped down to a shoreline of white sand that gleamed in the morning sun. Beyond the beach, the water was the most extraordinary shade of blue he had ever seen, turquoise at the shore, deepening to sapphire further out, clear and calm and glittering with reflected light. The sky was vast and cloudless, a pale, soft blue that seemed to go on forever.
But it was the island itself that stole his breath, flowers grew everywhere, wild, sprawling, abundant blooms that cascaded down the cliffs and carpeted the meadows in explosions of color. He saw flowers in shades he had never encountered before, deep violet, vivid orange, a blue so pale it was almost silver. Trees heavy with fruit he did not recognize bent over natural pathways, their branches laden with something golden and round, something dark and pear-shaped, something that resembled a pomegranate but was the color of honey.
The air was warm and sweet, thick with the scent of blossoms and salt and damp earth. Birds sang somewhere in the distance, strange, melodic calls that were not quite like any birdsong he knew. A waterfall tumbled down the cliff face to his left, a thin silver ribbon that caught the light and threw rainbows into the air.
Jace stood there, swaying slightly on his still-weak legs, and he could not speak.
âI know,â you said quietly, standing beside him. âIt is a great deal, after so long underground.â
âI have never seen anything like this.â
âIt is home.â Your voice was matter of fact, but there was something softer underneath it, something almost sad. âCome. There is a place to sit not far from here. You should not stand for too long yet.â
He let you lead him to a flat outcropping of rock cushioned with moss and ferns, and he sat down heavily, still staring out at the impossible landscape. The flowers swayed in the breeze. The waterfall sang its endless song. The sea glittered and danced.
And there was no one here, the realization crept up on him slowly, settling over his shoulders like a cold cloak. He looked out at the island, the meadows, the fruit trees, the white sand beach, the cliffs, and he saw no houses and no fishing boats pulled up on the shore. He saw no paths worn by the tread of many feet and no smoke rising from chimneys. He heard no voices calling in the distance. He saw no sign of human life at all.
Only the flowers. The birds. The waterfall. The sea.
And you.
â
He did not say anything at first, you helped him walk a little further each day, down to the edge of the meadow where the strange golden fruit grew on low, sprawling trees, up to a ridge that overlooked the eastern shore where the water was even bluer and the sky even wider. You showed him the tidal pools, teeming with tiny creatures he had never seen, brightly colored shells that moved on dozens of legs, star-shaped animals that clung to the rocks, fish that darted and flashed like living jewels.
And everywhere you went, you were the only person, he saw no footprints but yours, he saw no structures but the cave. The only signs of cultivation were a small vegetable garden tucked into a sheltered hollow behind the cliffs, neat rows of plants he recognized, mostly herbs and some kind of root vegetable, and further back, half-hidden by a grove of flowering trees, a low stone wall enclosing a patch of churned earth.
He heard the pigs before he saw them, a grunting, snuffling chorus rose and fell, punctuated by the occasional indignant squeal. Jace followed the sound, moving carefully along a narrow path between two rock formations, and emerged into a clearing where at least two dozen pigs were milling about in a large stone enclosure. They were fat and healthy, their coats glossy, their ears flopping. Piglets tumbled over each other in the dirt while larger sows dozed in the shade of the trees.
And you were in the middle of them, you were scattering something from a woven basket, scraps of fruit rinds and vegetable peels and some kind of grain, and the pigs crowded around you like old friends. You were speaking to them in a low, affectionate murmur, and your hands moved among them with the ease of long familiarity.
You looked up and saw him standing at the edge of the enclosure. Your expression shifted, just slightly. Something guarded, something wary, flickered behind your eyes before you smoothed it away.
âYou found my pigs,â you said, Jace leaned against the stone wall, catching his breath. The walk had been longer than he had realized, and his side was aching. âYou have a lot of pigs.â
âThey keep me company.â You tossed another handful of scraps into the enclosure, and a particularly large sow shouldered her way forward to claim it. âAnd they are useful. The meat, the fat, the leather. Nothing goes to waste.â
He watched you for a moment. The pigs jostled around your legs, grunting and snuffling, and you moved among them without the slightest hesitation, like a shepherdess, like someone who had been doing this for years.
âWhere are the other people?â he asked.
Your hands stilled on the basket. You did not look up.
âWhat other people?â
âThe villagers. The farmers. Whoever else lives here.â Jace gestured vaguely at the enclosure, at the pigs, at the island beyond. âYou said this was your island. But someone has to help you with all of this.â
He trailed off. You were looking at him now, and your expression was strange, as though you had been expecting this question and dreading it in equal measure.
âThere are no other people, Jace,â you said quietly.
He stared at you. âWhat do you mean, there are no other people?â
âI mean it is only me.â You set the basket down on the stone wall. Your hands, now empty, folded together in front of you. âThere is no village. There are no farmers. There are no fishermen or shepherds or traders. There is only me, and the pigs, and the birds, and the fish in the sea. That is all.â
The words refused to make sense. Jace shook his head, a short, sharp movement. âThat cannot be right. You cannot live here alone. How do you survive? How do you get supplies? There has to be someone else, a trader who comes by ship, a neighboring island, something.â
âThere is no one else.â Your voice was calm and steady, but there was something raw underneath it now. âNo ships come here. No traders. No neighbors. The island is hidden. It does not appear on any map. No one knows it exists.â
âThat is impossible.â
âIt is simply true.â
Jace pushed himself off the stone wall, ignoring the protest of his healing wounds. His heart was beating too fast. His thoughts were spinning. âHow did you get here, then? How do you live? You cannot simply be alone on an island forever.â
âI did not say I chose it.â
The words stopped him cold, you were still standing in the middle of the pig enclosure, surrounded by grunting, oblivious animals. Your strange dress fluttered in the breeze, the pale fabric catching the sunlight. Your face was composed, but your eyes were dark with something old and heavy and carefully buried.
âMy brother sent me here,â you said. âAs punishment.â
Jace opened his mouth, closed it, opened it again. âPunishment for what?â
âFor disobeying him.â Your voice was flat now, reciting facts rather than feelings. âI did something he could not forgive. And instead of killing me, he sent me here. He had the means to do it, the ships, the men, the knowledge of this place. He left me with supplies and seeds and animals and told me I would never leave.â
âYou have been here ever since,â Jace said slowly.
âI have been here ever since.â
âHow long?â
You looked away, out over the blue water, and for a moment you were utterly still. âA long time.â
Jaceâs mind was racing, scrambling to fit the pieces together. A brother with enough power to exile someone to a hidden island. Ships and men and the means to keep the place secret. A lord powerful enough to make his sister disappear without anyone asking questions.
âWho is your brother?â he asked.
Your jaw tightened. âA lord. That is all you need to know.â
âA lord of what? Where? What house?â
âIt does not matter.â Your voice sharpened, just slightly, the first hint of steel he had ever heard from you. âWhat matters is that he is powerful enough to do this. Powerful enough that if I try to leave, if I find a way off this island and set foot on the mainland, I will be found and I will be brought back, and the consequences will be worse than exile.â
Jace stared at you, you were alone. Completely, utterly alone. You had been alone for what might have been months or years or decades. You had built a life in a cave, furnished it with silk and polished wood, grown a garden and raised pigs and taught yourself to heal. And no one had come for you. No one had visited. No one had even known you were here.
Until a dying dragon prince washed up on your shore.
âI am sorry,â he said, and the words felt pathetically inadequate. âI did not know.â
âHow could you have known?â You picked up the basket again, your movements brisk and practical, as if you were eager to change the subject. âYou were unconscious when you arrived. It is not as if I introduced myself and gave you a tour. Welcome to my prison, please enjoy the flowers.â
âIt is not a prison.â You looked at him, and your smile was tired and sad and strangely kind. âIt is a very beautiful prison. But it is a prison nonetheless.â You turned and walked away, the basket tucked under your arm, the pigs trailing after you like a strange, grunting entourage. Jace watched you go, your bare shoulders and your flowing dress and the way you moved through the meadow as if you had memorized every inch of it.
And he understood, suddenly, why you had never hesitated to save him. Why you had sat beside his bed for days on end. Why you had laughed at his stupid jokes and argued with him about the proper way to brew medicinal tea.
You were lonely.
Jace stood at the edge of the pig enclosure, the sun warm on his face and the sea glittering in the distance, and he thought about his mother and his brothers and the war and the throne.
He had to go back. He had to, but as he watched you disappear into the grove of flowering trees, your figure growing smaller and smaller against the impossible beauty of the island, he realized that leaving might be harder than he had thought.
â
In the days following your revelationâit is just me, there is no one elseâJace threw himself into the work of recovery with a ferocity that surprised even him. He woke early, before the light through the cave entrance had shifted from silver to gold, and he pushed his body harder than was probably wise. He walked the island's paths until his legs stopped shaking. He climbed the low cliffs until his arms stopped burning. He ate everything you put in front of him, slept when you told him to sleep, and bit back every complaint when you made him drink your bitter medicines.
"Someone is motivated," you remarked one morning, watching him pace the length of the chamber. He had been doing lapsâback and forth, back and forthâtesting the strength of his newly healed legs. The scars on his shoulder and side had faded to pink, then to white, and the pain was a distant memory now, only flaring when he moved too quickly or twisted the wrong way.
"I have to get home," he said, not breaking stride. "My mother needs me. My brothers need me. Every day I spend here is another day they think I'm dead."
You nodded, your expression unreadable. "Then we had better build you a boat."
The boat took shape slowly, you showed him a grove of trees on the eastern side of the island, tall and straight, their wood pale and close-grained, ideal for shipbuilding. You had an axe, kept sharp and well-oiled in one of the storage chambers, and you handed it to him without ceremony.
"I will help where I can," you said, "but I am not a shipwright. You will have to figure out most of it yourself."
Jace had never built a boat before. He had sailed on dozens of them but knowing how to sail and knowing how to build were two very different things. He felled the first tree through trial and error, the axe handle blistering his palms, the sweat dripping into his eyes. By the time the trunk crashed to the ground, he was exhausted and exhilarated in equal measure.
"Not bad," you said from where you sat on a nearby rock, a pile of mending in your lap. You had been watching him work for the better part of an hour, offering no advice but plenty of company. "For a prince who has never done a day's labor in his life."
"I've done labor."
"Name one example."
He opened his mouth and swung the axe into the fallen trunk with more force than necessary. "I trained with swords. That's labor."
"Swords are not labor. Swords are play for princes."
"Then what do you call this?" He gestured at the tree, the axe, his blistered hands.
You smiled, that slow, warm smile that was becoming as familiar to him as the sunrise. "I call it a good start."
The days passed, Jace shaped the wood as best he could, stripping branches and hewing planks with tools you provided from the depths of the cave. Some of them were strangeâshaped for hands slightly different from his own, their handles worn smooth by use that was not his. He didn't ask where they came from. He was learning that there were questions you would answer and questions you would not, and the line between them was invisible until he crossed it.
But you were always there, always nearby.
He had grown accustomed to the rhythm of your presence, the rustle of your strange, flowing dresses, the soft pad of your bare feet on stone, the quiet humming you did when you worked. You brought him water when the sun grew hot. You checked his scars every evening, your fingers against his skin, pronouncing him healed and healing well. You sat with him while he ate, and you talked about nothing and everything, and your laugh was the brightest sound on an island full of bright sounds.
"I should be further along by now," he said one evening, staring at the skeleton of the boat with frustration. The hull was taking shape, but slowlyâtoo slowly. At this rate, it would be months before it was seaworthy.
"You are one person building a boat by hand," you pointed out. You were sitting cross-legged on a flat rock, sorting through a basket of herbs. The setting sun caught the planes of your face, the curve of your bare shoulders, the way your dress draped across your lap in soft folds. "I think you are allowed to take your time."
"I don't have time." He ran a hand through his hairâlonger now, curling past his ears, in desperate need of a trim. "My motherâshe needs me. The warâ"
He stopped.
The war.
What war?
The thought slipped through his mind like water through fingers, there and gone before he could catch it. There was a war. Of course there was a war. He was fighting in it. Or he had been fighting in it. That was why he had been in the Gullet, why Vermax hadâ
Vermax.
His chest tightened. He remembered the dragon's scream. He remembered the water closing over his head. He remembered the arrows.
But what was the war about?
"The war," he repeated, more quietly now. "I have to get back to the war."
You looked up from your herbs, and your expression was gentle. Unreadable. "You will. When the boat is ready, you will."
"Right." He nodded, the motion jerky. "Right. The boat."
He picked up the axe and got back to work.
â
One afternoon you were down by the shore, sitting in the shade of a flowering tree while Jace worked on the boat's hull. "Brothers," he said, sanding down a rough edge of wood. "Three of them. Wellâtwo full brothers. Two half-brothers. That's four. No, wait." He frowned. "Joffrey and... and the little ones. Aegon and..."
He stopped, the name wouldn't come.
"Viserys," you said quietly.
"Viserys. Right. Viserys." He shook his head, laughing at himself. "I don't know why I couldn't remember that. He's the youngest. Named after my grandfather."
You said nothing. You only watched him with those shifting sea-glass eyes, and your fingers were very still on the mending in your lap.
"And Luke," Jace continued, the name coming easier now. "Lucerys. He's the second one. He's..."
Dead.
The word surfaced from somewhere deep, cold and sharp as a blade. But it didn't hurt the way it should have. It was distant. Muffled. Like a scream heard through a closed door.
"He's what?" you asked.
Jace blinked. "He's... he's at Dragonstone. With our mother. Waiting for me to come home."
You nodded slowly. "I am sure he misses you."
"He probably thinks I'm dead." Jace turned back to the boat, running his hand along the smooth wood. "I have to get back soon. Before he does something stupid. He's always doing stupid things, Luke. He's impulsive. Reckless. He doesn't think before he acts."
Luke is dead. Luke was torn apart by Vhagar above Storm's End. You weren't there. You didn't protect him.
But the voice was fading. Growing quieter. Harder to hear over the sound of the waves and the breeze and your soft, steady breathing.
â
The boat took longer than it should have, some days Jace worked on it from sunrise to sunset, his hands raw and calloused, his back aching, his mind fixed on the singular goal of getting home. But other daysâmore and more days, as the weeks wore onâhe found himself... distracted.
The waterfall, for one thing.
It tumbled down the cliff face on the western side of the island, a silver ribbon that caught the sunlight and scattered it into rainbows. The pool at its base was deep and clear and shockingly cold, fed by some underground spring that kept it cool even in the heat of the afternoon. Jace had discovered it on one of his exploratory walks, and he had been drawn back to it again and again.
You came with him sometimes. You would sit on the rocks at the edge of the pool, your feet dangling in the water, your dress hiked up to your knees. You would tilt your face toward the sun and close your eyes, and Jace would find himself watching you instead of the waterfall.
"Are you going to swim or are you going to stare?" you asked one day, not opening your eyes.
"I wasn't staring."
"You were staring."
"I was... appreciating the scenery."
You opened one eye. "The scenery."
"The waterfall," he said, gesturing vaguely. "It's very nice."
You laughedâthat bright, unguarded laugh that he had come to loveâand he felt something warm bloom in his chest. Something that had nothing to do with the sun.
"Come on, then," you said, and before he could react, you slid off the rock and into the water with a splash that sent droplets arcing through the air like diamonds.
Jace stared at you. You surfaced a moment later, your hair plastered to your head, your dress clinging to your skin, the wet fabric rendered nearly transparent. The water lapped at your collarbones, and you were laughing again, and you lookedâ
You looked beautiful.
He had known you were beautiful from the moment he opened his eyes in the candlelit cave. But there was something different about you now. Something that had shifted, the curves of your face seemed softer. The color of your eyes seemed deeper. The way you movedâthe way you laughedâthe way you looked at himâit all seemed more vivid. More precious.
"Are you coming in or not?" you called, treading water in the center of the pool.
Jace pulled his shirt over his head and dove in after you, the water was cold and clean and wonderful. They splashed each other like children, chasing each other around the pool, ducking under the waterfall and emerging gasping and laughing. Jace couldn't remember the last time he had laughed like thisâfreely, openly, without the weight of duty pressing down on his shoulders.
Your dress clung to you like a second skin, the wet fabric outlining every curve of your body. Jace tried very hard not to notice. He failed. "You're staring again," you said, but your voice was different now. Quieter. Almost shy.
"Sorry." He wasn't sorry.
â
"I was betrothed," he said one evening.
You were sitting on the rocks overlooking the western sea, watching the sun sink toward the horizon in a blaze of orange and pink. Jace sat beside you, close enough that he could feel the warmth of your arm near his. The boat sat half-finished on the beach below, forgotten for the day.
"Was?" you asked.
"Am. I am betrothed." He frowned. "I think. We were supposed to marry before... before I left."
"Before the battle."
"Before the battle, yes." He stared out at the sunset, trying to conjure her face. His betrothed. She was a Targaryen, he was sure of that. Silver hair. Purple eyes. A dragon. But her nameâher name wouldn't come. "She's my cousin, I think. Or my step-sister. Both, actually. It's complicated."
"What is her name?"
Jace opened his mouth. The name wasn't there.
"I can't remember," he said, and the admission felt strange. Not frighteningâit should have been frighteningâbut strange. Like discovering a pocket in a familiar coat that he had never noticed before. "I know her face. She's... she's fierce. Brave. She has a dragon. A small one, I think. Or maybe it's large. I can't..."
He trailed off.
You were quiet for a moment. Then, very softly: "Do you love her?"
"Love?" He considered the question. "I don't know. She's family. She's duty. She's... she's what I'm supposed to do, but i care for her, a lot."
"That is not the same as love."
"No," he agreed. "It's not."
He didn't say anything else. Neither did you. But your arm was warm against his, and the sunset was beautiful, and when he finally walked you back to the cave, his hand found the small of your back without thinking, and you leaned into the touch instead of pulling away.
â
He forgot about the betrothed entirely by morning.
â
The days grew warmer. Or perhaps they didn'tâperhaps it was only that Jace had stopped paying attention to the passage of time. The boat sat on the beach, half-finished, and he told himself he would work on it tomorrow. Tomorrow came and went, and he spent it with you insteadâwalking the island paths, gathering fruit from the strange golden trees, sitting by the waterfall and talking about nothing.
What are you doing? a voice whispered in the back of his mind. You have to go home. Your mother needs you.
But what did his mother need him for? There was somethingâsomething importantâsomething about a throne, a war, a betrayal. But the details were foggy now, blurred like ink left out in the rain.
He remembered her face. Her silver hair. Her voice saying his name, but the rest was slipping away, piece by piece, day by day, and the more he forgot, the more he noticed you.
The way you moved through the meadow, your skirts brushing the wildflowers. The way you hummed when you cooked, some melody he had never heard before but that felt familiar anyway. The way you looked at him sometimes, quick glances from beneath your lashes, as if you were checking to make sure he was still there. Still real. Still alive.
The way your hand felt in his when he helped you over a rocky patch of ground.
The way your laugh echoed off the cliffs and came back to them multiplied, a chorus of joy.
The way your eyes caught the light of the setting sun and held it, like they were made of something more than flesh.
He loved you.
He loved the sound of your voice and the curve of your smile and the gentle patience with which you had nursed him back from the edge of death. He loved your dry humor and your quiet strength and the way you never pressed him for answers he didn't have. He loved the life you had built here, alone on an island that should not exist, and he loved that you had let him into it.
He loved you.
And the more he loved you, the less he remembered.
â
The morning was hot and still, Jace had woken early, as he always did now, but instead of reaching for the axe or walking down to the beach where the half-finished boat sat waiting, he had gone straight to the waterfall.
The pool was cool and clear, fed by the endless rush of water that tumbled down the cliff face in a silver curtain. He shed his clothes on the rocks, just the loose linen breeches you had sewn for him from fabric found somewhere in the depths of the cave, and dove in without hesitation. The cold shock of the water stole his breath and cleared his head, chasing away the last cobwebs of sleep.
He floated on his back, staring up at the pale blue sky, watching the birds wheel overhead. His dark hair fanned out in the water around him. The scars on his shoulder and side had faded to thin white lines, barely visible now. He was stronger than he had ever been, his muscles hardened by weeks of manual labor, his skin tanned golden by the sun.
He should have been thinking about the boat, about going home, about his mother and his brothers and the war.
He was thinking about you. Your laugh, your smile, the way your eyes caught the light. The way your hand felt in his. The way you looked at him sometimes, soft and searching, with something unspoken hovering just behind your lips. He had kissed you before, small kisses, brief and chaste, a press of his lips to your forehead when you fell asleep beside him, a brush of his mouth against your knuckles when you handed him a cup of water. But he had not kissed you properly. He had not kissed you the way he wanted to, the way he had been imagining for weeks, the way that left no doubt about what he felt.
He was thinking about that when he heard your footsteps on the rocks above. "You started without me."
Jace turned in the water, treading easily, and looked up at you. You were standing at the edge of the pool, barefoot on the smooth stone, wearing your dress of pale purple gossamer that drifted around your ankles in the faint breeze. The sun caught the planes of your face and the curve of your neck and the dip of your collarbones, and the sight of you struck him silent for a moment.
"Someone has to," he called back, forcing his voice into something approaching normal. "You sleep too late."
"I was gathering herbs. Some of us have work to do."
"Swimming is work. It builds character."
You laughed, that bright, warm sound that he had come to treasure more than anything else on this island. "Is that what you are doing? Building character?"
"Come in and find out."
You hesitated for just a moment. Your eyes met his across the water, and something flickered in your expression, something tentative and questioning, as if you were making a decision and waiting to see if he would notice.
Then you reached up and untied the clasps at your shoulders.
The dress fell and Jace stopped breathing.
You stood above him in nothing but the sunlight, bare to the sky and the water and his gaze. The curves of your body were soft and smooth, your skin glowing in the morning light. Your breasts were full and round and tight in the open air. Your waist dipped inward in a graceful curve before flaring out to the swell of your hips.
You were the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.
"Are you coming in or not?" he asked, his voice rougher than he intended.
You smiled, then you dove into the water in one clean, graceful arc, slicing through the surface with barely a splash.
You surfaced inches from him, the water lapped at your collarbones, but beneath the surface he could see the pale shape of your body, distorted by the ripples, impossibly close. Droplets clung to your lashes. Your hair floated around you like ink spilled in water. Your lips were parted and slightly wet, and you were looking at him with those shifting sea-glass eyes, and Jace forgot how to think.
"The water is nice," you said, and your voice was teasing and light, but there was a tremor underneath it.
"Nice," he repeated. He could not stop staring at your mouth.
"Very refreshing."
"I had not noticed."
"No?"
"No."
His hand found your waist beneath the water. Your skin was cool and slick and impossibly soft. You did not pull away. You drifted closer, your bare legs brushing against his, and the contact sent a jolt through him like lightning striking water. He could feel the heat of your core through the cool water, a promise of the warmth waiting for him, and his cock stirred against the confines of his breeches.
"Jace," you whispered.
That was all. Just his name, but the way you said it, breathless and aching and full of want, broke something open inside him.
He kissed you, his mouth strong against yours. His hand tightened on your waist, pulling you flush against him. His other hand came up to cup the back of your head, fingers tangling in your hair. You made a small, desperate sound against his lips and kissed him back just as fiercely, your arms winding around his neck, your bare breasts pressing against the hard plane of his chest.
You were bare beneath his hands, there was nothing between his palms and your skin but water. He could feel every curve of you against the hard muscle of his own. His thumbs traced the ridges of your middle, and you shivered, and he swallowed the sound you made. His hands slid lower, cupping the full curve of your arse, kneading the firm flesh, pulling your hips against his so you could feel the rigid length of him pressing against your belly through the wet linen of his breeches.
"Jace," you gasped against his mouth. "Jace, Iâ"
"Tell me to stop." His voice was wrecked, barely recognizable. "Tell me to stop and I will stop."
"Do not stop." Your fingers dug into his shoulders, nails biting into his sun-warmed skin. "Please do not stop."
He kissed you again, deeper this time, slower. His tongue traced the seam of your lips, and you opened for him with a shuddering breath. The taste of you, sweet and clean and faintly herbal from the medicines you were always brewing, flooded his senses. He explored your mouth thoroughly, learning the texture of your tongue, the ridge of your teeth, the softness of your inner cheeks. You moaned into his mouth and sucked on his tongue, and the sensation went straight to his groin. He could feel your heart pounding against his chest, or perhaps that was his own heart, hammering so hard he thought it might crack his ribs.
Your legs wrapped around his waist beneath the water. The movement was instinctive and natural, and it brought your hips flush against his, the heat of your sex pressing against the hard ridge of his cock through his breeches. He groaned against your mouth, low and rough, his fingers digging into the soft flesh of your thighs. You were so warm. Even in the cool water, the core of you radiated a heat that he could feel through the fabric separating them.
He walked you backward through the pool, still kissing you, still holding you, until your back met the smooth stone of the cliff wall. The waterfall rushed beside them, a curtain of silver sound. He kissed the hollow of your throat, feeling your pulse flutter against his lips. He traced the delicate line of your collarbone with his tongue, tasting the clean, mineral tang of the spring water on your skin. He let his mouth drift lower, over the swell of your breast, and when his lips closed around one tight, pebbled nipple, you gasped and arched against him, your fingers fisting in his hair.
He lavished attention on your breasts, suckling first one and then the other, his tongue circling the tight buds, his teeth grazing them with just enough pressure to make you moan. Your breasts were perfect in his hands, full and soft, fitting his palms as though they had been made for him. He kneaded them gently, thumbs brushing over the wet peaks, watching your face contort with pleasure. Your head had fallen back against the stone, your lips parted, your eyes squeezed shut. The sight of you like this, bare and wanting and completely surrendered to his mouth, made his cock throb painfully against his breeches.
"I have wanted this," he breathed against your skin, his voice ragged. "Gods, I have wanted this for so long."
"Then do not wait any longer."
He lifted his head and looked at you. Your eyes were dark with want, your lips swollen from his kisses, your chest rising and falling with rapid, shallow breaths. The water lapped at your breasts, revealing and hiding, and he could feel every inch of you pressed against him, every curve, every soft place, every point of contact where your body met his.
"Are you sure?" he asked. He needed to hear it. He needed to know.
In answer, you cupped his face in your hands and pulled him down to you. "I have never been more sure of anything in my life."
He kissed you again, soft and sweet this time, a promise and a question all at once. Then his hand slid down your body beneath the water, tracing the curve of your waist, the swell of your hip, the sensitive skin of your inner thigh. Your legs tightened around his waist, and he felt you tremble against him. His fingers found the heat of you, warm and slick even in the cool water, and he traced the folds of your sex with a feather-light touch. You gasped and bucked against his hand. He explored you slowly, learning the shape of you, the soft outer lips, the slick inner petals, the hard pearl of your pleasure at the apex. When he circled that sensitive nub with his thumb, you cried out, a sound half-lost in the rush of the waterfall. He swallowed it with his mouth, kissing you through it, his touch gentle and searching and patient. He slid one finger inside you, feeling the tight, wet heat of your body grip him, and you moaned against his lips. He added a second finger, stretching you gently, his thumb still circling your sensitive peak, and you writhed against his hand, your inner walls clenching around his fingers.
"Please," you whispered, the word broken and beautiful. "Please, Jace. I need you inside me."
He withdrew his fingers, and you made a small sound of protest that he silenced with a kiss. He reached down and freed himself from his breeches, his cock springing out, hard and thick and aching. The head was dark with need, a bead of moisture already forming at the tip. You glanced down through the clear water and your eyes widened at the sight of him, long and rigid, curving slightly upward toward his belly.
"You are so beautiful," he murmured, positioning himself at your entrance. He rubbed the head of his cock against your slick folds, coating himself in your wetness, teasing you both with the promise of what was to come. "I want to watch your face when I enter you. I want to see what I do to you."
Your legs tightened around his waist, your heels pressing into the small of his back. "Then do it. I want to feel you."
He pushed into you slowly, so slowly, inch by agonizing inch. The water made everything liquid and easy, but he wanted to savor this, the way your eyes fluttered closed, the way your mouth fell open, the way your body welcomed him. You were so tight and so warm and so perfect around him. He could feel every ridge and fold of your inner walls as they gripped him and fluttered and stretched to accommodate his size. Your heat enveloped him, searing even through the cool water, and he had to stop and breathe when he was fully sheathed, his forehead pressed to yours, his whole body shaking with the effort of holding back.
"Look at me," he murmured. "Please. Look at me."
Your eyes opened. They were dark and shining, full of something that looked very much like love. "You feel incredible," you breathed. "I am so full."
He began to move, he withdrew almost completely, feeling the drag of your body against every inch of his length, and then pushed back in with a slow, deep thrust that made you both gasp. The sensation was overwhelming, the tight clutch of your body, the heat, the way your inner muscles rippled around him. He set a steady rhythm, each stroke deliberate and full, sliding into you to the hilt and then pulling back until only the head remained inside you. The water splashed gently around them, ripples spreading outward in concentric circles with every movement. Your legs tightened around his waist, your heels digging into the small of his back, pulling him deeper with every thrust. Your hands slid down his spine, tracing the ridges of muscle that flexed with every movement. You were making soft, breathless sounds, gasps and moans and fragments of his name, and he caught each one with his mouth, kissing you, drinking you down like wine.
"You feel incredible," he groaned against your lips. "So tight. So perfect. I could stay inside you forever."
"So do you," you gasped, your words barely coherent, slurred with pleasure. "Harder, Jace. Please."
He did not need to be asked twice. His pace quickened, his hips slamming against yours with increasing force. The sound of their coupling echoed off the cliff walls, wet and rhythmic, the slap of skin against skin beneath the water. Your breasts bounced with every thrust, and he watched them, mesmerized by the way they moved, the way the water lapped at the peaks. He bent his head and captured one nipple in his mouth again, sucking hard, grazing it with his teeth, and you cried out sharply, your inner walls clenching around him.
He shifted his angle slightly, tilting his hips, and on the next thrust you cried out sharply, your head falling back against the stone, your whole body arching against his. He had found the right spot, that sensitive place deep inside you, and he drove into it again and again, watching your face contort with pleasure. Your brow furrowed and your lips parted and your eyes lost focus, and you were babbling now, a stream of broken words, his name and pleas for more and incoherent praise.
"There," you gasped. "Right there. Do not stop. Please do not stop."
He did not stop. He could not have stopped if the world was ending. There was nothing but you, your body, your voice, your hands on his skin. He felt your inner walls begin to flutter around him, the first warning signs of your approaching climax, and he moved his hand between your bodies, finding the slick, sensitive pearl of you beneath the water. He pressed his thumb against it in tight, circling strokes, matching the rhythm of his thrusts.
"That is it," he murmured against your ear, his voice low and rough. "Let go. I want to feel you come apart around me."
Your climax took you by surprise. He felt it building, the way your breath quickened, the way your nails bit into his shoulders, the way your body tightened around him until he could barely move. And then you shattered, crying out his name, your head thrown back, your whole body arching and shuddering against his. He felt the rhythmic pulsing of your release gripping his cock, your inner walls milking him in waves, and he watched your face contort with pleasure, your mouth open, your eyes squeezed shut, your cheeks flushed dark. The sight of you, bare and beautiful and completely undone, was enough to push him over the edge. He drove into you one final time, burying himself to the hilt, and let go. His release surged through him in hot, pulsing waves, spilling deep inside you, and he groaned your name against the curve of your neck, his body shaking with the force of his climax.
For a long moment, neither of you moved, your breathing slowed, your chest rising and falling against his. Your fingers traced lazy patterns on the back of his neck. He remained inside you, still half-hard, reluctant to separate from the warmth of your body. He could feel his seed and your slickness mingled together, warm and wet around him, and the sensation was so intimate, so perfect, that he never wanted to move again.
"Jace," you whispered, and your voice was hoarse and sweet and utterly content.
He lifted his head and looked at you. Your cheeks were flushed. Your lips were red and swollen. Your hair was a wild tangle around your shoulders. Your eyes were soft and hazy with satisfaction. You had never looked more beautiful.
"I love you," he said.
The words came out before he could stop them, before he even realized he was thinking them. But once they were spoken, he knew they were true. He loved you. He loved you so completely and so absolutely that he could barely remember what his life had been before you. You were everything. You were the sun and the sea and the stars. You were the only thing that mattered.
Your eyes widened. "I love you too," you said. "I have loved you since the moment you opened your eyes."
He kissed you again, softly this time, tenderly, a kiss that tasted of water and salt and promises. And then he held you, your body still wrapped around his, the waterfall cool against his back, the sun warm on his face.
They did not leave the pool for a long time. When they finally climbed out, their skin pruned and their limbs heavy with satisfaction, they did not bother to dress. Jace carried you to a patch of soft grass beneath the flowering trees, and he laid you down among the fallen petals, pink and white and gold. He knelt between your spread thighs and looked down at you, at your bare body glistening with water droplets, at the place where his seed was already beginning to leak from your swollen folds, and he felt himself harden again at the sight.
He made love to you again, slower this time, sweeter. He kissed his way down your body, his mouth tracing the hollow of your throat, the swell of your breasts, the plane of your stomach. He paused to dip his tongue into your navel, making you squirm, and then continued lower, pressing kisses to your hip bones, the sensitive crease where your thighs met your body. When he reached the junction of your thighs, he settled between them and looked up at you. Your scent was intoxicating, musky and sweet and mixed with the salt of his own release. He could see the evidence of their earlier coupling, the glistening slickness that coated your folds, and the sight made him groan with want.
He tasted you properly for the first time. His tongue parted your folds, tracing a slow path from your entrance to the peak of your pleasure. The taste of you combined with the taste of him was earthy and raw and utterly intoxicating. You cried out and fisted your hands in the grass, your hips rising to meet his mouth. He took his time, learning what you liked, alternating between broad, flat strokes of his tongue and focused, circling attention to your sensitive peak. He slid two fingers inside you as he sucked on that tight bundle of nerves, curling them forward to press against that sensitive spot on your inner wall, and you came apart against his mouth, your thighs trembling around his head, your voice breaking on his name, your body gushing wetness that he lapped up eagerly.
After that, they walked back to the cave hand in hand, bare and unashamed, their clothes forgotten on the rocks by the waterfall. The sun had climbed higher in the sky, and the island was alive with birdsong and the scent of flowers. Jace kept his hand on the small of your back as you walked, unable to stop touching you, his thumb tracing small circles against your skin.
When you reached the bedchamber, the bed where he had first woken, the furs soft and the candles flickering on the walls, he took you again. This time you pushed him down onto his back and climbed on top of him, straddling his hips. You looked down at him and you reached between your bodies to guide him to your entrance. He watched his cock disappear inside you, inch by inch, watched the way your folds stretched to accommodate him, and the sight was almost enough to make him spend right there. You sank down until he was fully seated inside you, and you both moaned at the sensation.
You began to move, rolling your hips in a slow, sinuous rhythm. He watched you move above him, your breasts swaying with each roll of your hips, your stomach flexing, your head thrown back in pleasure. He reached up and cupped your breasts, rolling the tight peaks between his fingers, and you gasped and increased your pace. Your thighs flexed as you rose and fell, taking him deeper with every stroke. He guided you with his hands on your waist, helping you find a rhythm that made you both moan, his thumbs pressing into the soft flesh of your hips.
"Look at you," he breathed, his voice full of wonder. "You are so beautiful riding my cock."
You leaned forward, bracing your hands on his chest, and the new angle made you gasp. He thrust up into you from below, meeting your movements, and the wet sound of your bodies joining filled the chamber. Your inner walls were fluttering around him again, your breath coming in short, sharp gasps. He moved one hand to where your bodies were joined and pressed his thumb against your sensitive peak, circling it in time with your movements. You cried out and shattered above him, your body clenching around him, your back arching. The sight of you, lost in pleasure, pushed him over the edge. He thrust up into you one final time and spilled his seed deep inside you, groaning your name, his hands gripping your hips hard enough to leave marks.
You collapsed against his chest, spent and trembling, and he wrapped his arms around you and held you close, still buried inside you. Your breath was warm against his neck. Your heart hammered against his chest. He could feel the thrum of your pulse where your bodies were still joined, and he never wanted to let you go.
You fell asleep like that, joined together, your body draped over his, and when you woke an hour later, the candles had burned lower and the light through the cave entrance had shifted to the gold of late afternoon. You stirred against him, and he felt himself harden again inside you, still buried in your warmth. You smiled sleepily and began to move your hips in a slow, lazy rhythm, and he rolled you onto your back and made love to you again, gentle and tender, whispering your name like a prayer.
After that day, they could not keep their hands off each other, it was as if a dam had broken. Every moment they were together, they were touching. His hand on the small of your back, your fingers tangled in his hair, his lips on your shoulder, your thigh pressed against his beneath the dinner table. The boat sat forgotten on the beach, the wood beginning to weather and grey in the salt air. The days blurred into a haze of sun and water and skin.
He took you in the meadow, surrounded by wildflowers, the grass tickling your bare skin as he moved inside you, your legs wrapped around his waist and your fingers digging into his back. The sun was warm on his shoulders and the scent of blossoms was thick in the air. He rolled onto his back, pulling you on top of him without breaking their connection, and you rode him among the flowers, your head thrown back, your breasts bouncing with every movement, the bright petals clinging to your damp skin.
You pulled him into the storage chamber one afternoon and pressed him against the cool stone wall. You sank to your knees before him on the worn stone floor, looking up at him and you freed him from his breeches with practiced hands. He was already hard, his cock springing out, the tip glistening. You wrapped your hand around the base of him, feeling the weight and heat of him in your palm, and then you leaned forward and took him into your mouth.
He groaned and buried his fingers in your hair as your lips closed around him. You took him slowly, deliberately, your tongue tracing the ridge on the underside of his shaft, your cheeks hollowing as you sucked. You worked him with your mouth and your hand in tandem, your head bobbing in a steady rhythm, your tongue swirling around the sensitive head on every upstroke. He watched you move, mesmerized, watching his cock disappear between your lips again and again, feeling the wet heat of your mouth, the gentle scrape of your teeth. When you took him deeper, relaxing your throat to accommodate his length, he groaned your name and tightened his grip on your hair.
You pulled back, your lips slick and swollen, a strand of saliva connecting you to his tip. You looked up at him and smiled, a slow, wicked smile, and then you took him deep again, hollowing your cheeks, increasing your pace. Your hand cupped him gently, rolling him in your palm, and the dual sensation pushed him closer and closer to the edge. When he could not hold back any longer, he warned you, his voice ragged, but you only took him deeper, and he spilled into your mouth with a ragged cry of your name. You swallowed everything he gave you, your throat working around him, and you did not pull away until he was spent and trembling.
You looked up at him, your lips slick and swollen, a tiny bead of his release at the corner of your mouth that you caught with your tongue. The sight of you, kneeling before him, having taken everything he had to give, made his spent cock twitch with interest. He pulled you to your feet and kissed you deeply, tasting himself on your tongue, and then he spun you around and bent you over the stone table where you mixed your medicines.
He bunched your skirts around your waist, baring you to his gaze. Your folds were already slick and glistening, your arousal dripping down your inner thighs. He ran his hand over the curve of your backside, kneading the firm flesh, and then he positioned himself at your entrance. He entered you from behind in one smooth thrust, burying himself to the hilt, and you gasped and clutched at the worn stone surface. He set a hard, fast rhythm, one hand gripping your hip hard enough to leave fingerprints and the other braced on the table beside yours. The sound of his hips slamming against your backside filled the small chamber, wet and rhythmic, punctuated by your breathless gasps and his low groans.
"Is this what you wanted when you got on your knees for me?" he asked, his voice rough. "Did you want me to bend you over and fuck you until you screamed?"
"Yes," you gasped, pushing back against him. "Yes, I wanted this. I wanted you."
He reached around and found your sensitive peak with his fingers, rubbing tight circles in time with his thrusts. The angle was perfect, driving him deep, hitting that spot inside you with every stroke. Your gasps turned to cries, your cries turned to screams, and when you came, your body clenching around him so tightly that he could barely move, he followed a heartbeat later, groaning your name into the curve of your shoulder, spilling himself deep inside you.
He stayed inside you until he softened, his forehead resting against your shoulder blade, both of you breathing hard. Then he pulled out gently and turned you around, and he kissed you softly, tenderly, his hands cupping your face.
Every night, they fell asleep tangled together in his bed, their bed now, and every morning they woke the same way. Sometimes he would wake first and simply watch you sleep, the soft rise and fall of your chest, the way your lips curved into a faint smile as if you were dreaming of him. Sometimes you would wake first and trace the lines of his scars with your fingertips, until he stirred and rolled on top of you and the day began the way all their days began now, with your legs around his waist and your soft cries filling the candlelit chamber.
He could not get enough of you. He could not get enough of your taste or your scent or the sounds you made when you came apart in his arms. He could not get enough of the way your eyes fluttered closed when he kissed your neck, or the way your back arched when he ran his hands down your sides, or the way you whispered his name in the darkness, over and over, like an incantation. He learned every inch of your body, every sensitive spot, every place that made you gasp and every place that made you moan. He learned the rhythm you liked, slow and deep when you were tender, fast and hard when you were hungry. He learned how to read your body well enough to know which one you needed before you had to ask. He learned that you liked it when he talked to you while he moved inside you, telling you how beautiful you were, how much he loved you, how he wanted to stay buried in your warmth forever.
And every time he was inside you, every time you came apart in his arms, every time he lost himself in the heat and the pleasure and the overwhelming, consuming love he felt for you, something else slipped away.
In many ways, you were. You were his world now. You were everything.
And he was forgetting that there had ever been anything else.
â
The ship appeared on the horizon like a ghost from a life Jace had almost forgotten, he was down by the shore, skipping stones across the glass-flat water while you gathered shells further down the beach.
Then he saw it, a dark shape cut against the glare of the sun. At first he thought it was a cloud, or a trick of the light, or one of the strange birds that sometimes wheeled overhead. But the shape grew larger and sharper and resolved itself into masts and sails and a hull cutting through the water.
Jace's hand froze mid-throw. The stone dropped from his fingers and plunked into the shallows.
"Jace?" Your voice came from further down the beach, laced with concern. "What is it?"
"A ship."
The word felt strange in his mouth, foreign. He had not seen a ship in how long? Months? Years? He could not remember. Time had stopped meaning anything on this island.
He squinted against the sun, his heart beating faster. The ship was large, a warship by the look of it, three masts and a reinforced hull. As it drew closer, he could make out the banner snapping from the mainmast.
A seahorse. Silver on sea-green.
Velaryon.
The name hit him like a wave. His grandfather's house. His mother's allies. His family. The memories surged up from wherever they had been hiding, Dragonstone, Driftmark, the fleet, Lord Corlys, the war.
The war. He was fighting a war. His mother needed him. He had to go home.
"They are here for me," he breathed, and then he was running down the beach, waving his arms over his head, shouting at the top of his lungs. "Here! I am here!"
The soldiers came ashore in a longboat, six of them, their armor gleaming in the sun, the Velaryon seahorse embossed on their breastplates. They were grizzled men, seasoned fighters, and when they saw Jace standing on the beach, their faces broke into expressions of shock and relief and barely contained joy.
"Prince Jacaerys," the lead soldier breathed, dropping to one knee in the sand. "We thought you were dead. The Queen, your mother, she sent ships to every corner of the Narrow Sea. She never gave up hope."
Jace pulled the man to his feet, his hands shaking. "My mother. Is she well? Is the war stillâ"
"The war continues, my prince. The queen has taken Kings Landing. She will be overjoyed to see you. Everyone believed you had perished at the Gullet."
The Gullet. The arrows. Vermax screaming. The water closing over his head.
Jace shoved the memories aside. "I am alive," he said, and he was laughing now, giddy with relief and adrenaline. "I am alive, and I am coming home."
He turned to find you, you were standing a few paces back, your hands clasped in front of you, watching the soldiers with an expression he could not read. Your strange dress fluttered in the sea breeze, and your eyes were dark and unreadable.
"This is Y/N," Jace said, pulling you forward. You came reluctantly, your bare feet dragging in the sand. "She saved my life. She pulled me from the water and nursed me back to health. I would not be alive without her."
The lead soldier bowed to you, respectful. "The Queen will want to thank you personally, my lady. You have done the realm a great service."
You said nothing. You only nodded, a small, stiff movement.
Jace pulled you aside while the soldiers began unloading supplies from the longboat. His hands were still shaking. His heart was pounding. He felt more alive than he had in weeks, or months, or however long it had been.
"You are coming with me," he said, the words tumbling out in a rush. "I know what you told me about your brother and the exile. But I am a prince, and my mother is the Queen. Whatever power your brother holds, it is nothing compared to the Iron Throne. We can protect you."
Your eyes widened. "Jace..."
"I mean it." He took your hands in his, squeezing tight. "You saved my life. You have been alone here for so long, and I am not going to leave you behind. Come with me to Westeros. I will keep you safe. I swear it."
For a long moment, you only looked at him. Your sea-glass eyes searched his face, looking for something he did not recognize. It might have been doubt or hesitation or some reason to refuse, then you smiled.
"Yes," you said. "I will come with you."
Jace pulled you into his arms and held you tight, his face buried in your hair, breathing in the scent of you, salt and flowers and home. "We leave at dawn," he murmured. "Tomorrow, we leave at dawn."
That night, you cooked a feast, the soldiers were camped on the beach, their tents pitched in a neat row above the tide line. They had offered to share their rations, but you had insisted, telling them in that quiet, gracious way of yours that they were guests on your island and that you would feed them.
Jace helped you carry platters of food down to the beach. There was roasted pork, crackling and golden, seasoned with herbs from your garden. There were strange fruits sliced and arranged in intricate patterns. There was fresh bread baked in the stone oven at the back of the cave, still warm and fragrant. And there was wine, more wine than Jace had ever seen in the cave, deep red wine in clay amphorae, rich and dark and potent.
"Where did you get all this?" he asked, watching you fill cup after cup for the soldiers.
You smiled, your hands steady on the amphora. "I have been saving it. For a special occasion."
The feast was a joyous affair. The soldiers laughed and sang and told Jace stories of the war, battles won and lost, allies gained and betrayed, the endless, grinding struggle for the Iron Throne. He listened with half an ear, nodding in the right places, but his attention kept drifting to you.
You moved among the soldiers like a ghost, refilling cups, offering plates of food, your smile never wavering. The men thanked you with drunken enthusiasm, their faces flushed with wine and gratitude. Jace felt a swell of pride watching you, his savior, his love, soon to be his companion in Westeros, where he would shower you with every luxury you had been denied on this lonely island.
"To the Prince!" one of the soldiers bellowed, raising his cup. "To Prince Jacaerys, returned from the dead!"
"To the Prince!" the others roared.
Jace raised his own cup and drank deep. The wine was stronger than he expected, and it went to his head almost immediately. The stars above seemed to blur and swirl. The fire on the beach danced and flickered. Your hand found his under the table, and he squeezed it tight.
Tomorrow, he thought. Tomorrow, we go home
â
He woke to sunlight and the sound of birdsong, his head pounded. His mouth was dry and sour with the aftertaste of wine. He groaned and pressed the heels of his palms against his eyes, trying to drive back the ache that throbbed behind them. How much had he drunk? He remembered the feast. He remembered the soldiers laughing, the wine flowing, your hand in his beneath the table. He remembered the fire on the beach and the stars wheeling overhead and the giddy, overwhelming relief of knowing that he was finally, finally going home.
The soldiers, Jace sat up so fast that the furs tangled around his legs and nearly sent him sprawling. The soldiers. The ship. They were leaving at dawn. He had to get up. He had to get dressed. He had toâ
He stumbled out of the bed and through the winding passages of the cave, his bare feet slapping against the cold stone. The light grew brighter as he ran, golden and warm, and then he burst through the cave entrance and stopped dead at the edge of the cliff.
The beach was empty, his eyes swept the shoreline, back and forth, back and forth, searching for the tents and the longboat and the supply crates. He looked for the ship, the great Velaryon warship with its three masts and its silver seahorse banner, riding at anchor in the bay.
There was nothing there, the white sand stretched out below him, pristine and unmarked. The sea glittered in the morning sun, calm and blue and utterly empty all the way to the horizon. No ship. No sails. No sign that anyone had ever been here at all.
"What..." Jace's voice came out hoarse, cracked. He turned and ran down the path to the beach, his legs still unsteady, his heart pounding against his ribs. He reached the sand and walked through the place where the camp had been, his eyes scanning the ground for any trace of the soldiers. A footprint. A scrap of cloth. A ring of stones where the fire had burned. A spilled cup. Anything.
The sand was smooth and unblemished. The tide had come in during the night and erased whatever marks might have been left behind.
"Jace?" Your voice drifted down from the cliff above, calm and curious. "What are you doing?"
He looked up. You were standing at the mouth of the cave, barefoot, wrapped in one of your flowing dresses, your hair loose around your shoulders. The morning light caught the soft curves of your face and made your eyes gleam.
"The soldiers," Jace called up to you. "The ship. Where are they?"
You tilted your head, your brow furrowing slightly. "What soldiers?"
The question hit him like a physical blow. He stood there on the empty beach, staring up at you, waiting for you to laugh or smile or tell him it was a joke. You only looked back at him with mild, patient confusion.
"The soldiers," he repeated, his voice rising. "The Velaryon soldiers. Six of them. They came yesterday in a warship. They landed on the beach. We had a feast. You served them roast pork and wine. They were going to take us home this morning."
Your expression did not change. That small, puzzled frown remained, as though he were speaking a language you did not quite recognize.
"Jace," you said gently, "I think you must have dreamed it."
"I did not dream it." He was breathing hard now, his hands clenching and unclenching at his sides. "They were here. They said my mother sent them. You spoke to them. Youâ"
He stopped, you were walking down the path to the beach now, your bare feet moving sure and steady over the rocks. When you reached the sand, you came to stand beside him, and your hand rose to rest against his cheek.
"You had a great deal of wine last night," you said, your voice soft and soothing. "More than I have ever seen you drink. Sometimes wine can make dreams feel very real."
Jace shook his head, pulling away from your touch. "It was not a dream. They were here. They were real."
"Then where are they now?" You gestured at the empty beach, the empty sea, the empty horizon. "Where is the ship? Where are the footprints? Where is the fire? If six men camped on this beach last night, where is the evidence of it?"
The sand was smooth. The sea was empty. There was no smoke rising from the ashes of a campfire. There were no tent pegs driven into the earth. There was no ship, no longboat, no sign that anyone but the two of you had ever set foot on this island.
"I do not know," he said, and his voice sounded thin and uncertain even to his own ears. "I do not understand."
You stepped closer, and your hand found his cheek again, and this time he did not pull away. Your palm was cool against his flushed skin.
"You have been through so much," you murmured. "Your body is still healing. Your mind is still healing. Dreams and memories and wishes can all blur together. But you are here with me, and you are safe. That is what matters."
Jace stared down at the sand. His head was pounding. His thoughts were tangled, slipping over each other like stones in a landslide. He remembered the feast so clearly, the taste of the roast pork, the sound of the soldiers' laughter, the weight of your hand in his. He remembered the banner snapping in the wind, silver seahorse on sea-green. He remembered the lead soldier kneeling in the sand, the shock and relief on his weathered face.
But the beach was empty.
"Perhaps you are right," he said slowly, and the words felt like surrender. "Perhaps I dreamed it."
You smiled, and your smile was warm and gentle and full of something that might have been relief. "Come back inside. I will make you something to eat. You will feel better once you have eaten."
He let you lead him back up the path and into the cave. He let you sit him down at the stone table. He let you place a plate of fruit and fresh bread in front of him, and he ate without tasting it, his mind still chasing the fragments of the dream that had felt so real.
That was what you had called it. A dream. And perhaps you were right. Perhaps the longing for home had grown so strong that his mind had conjured a rescue where none existed. Perhaps the wine had done the rest, weaving the longing into something that felt like memory.
Perhaps.
He did not think about it for the rest of the day, it was not until late afternoon that he noticed the pigs, he was walking past the enclosure without any particular destination in mind, his feet carrying him along the familiar path, when he stopped and frowned.
The pigs had always been numerous, he had never bothered to count them exactly, but now, looking at the enclosure, he could see that there were more than there had been the day before. Many more.
The sows jostled and grunted. The piglets tumbled over each other in the dirt. They were fat, healthy animals with glossy coats and floppy ears, rooting in the churned earth of the enclosure, there were at least twice as many pigs as there had been the day before.
Jace stood at the stone wall and stared at them. The pigs stared back, their small dark eyes unblinking, he stood there for a long time.
â
Days later, Jace found the hole by accident, though later he would wonder whether anything on this island ever happened by accident at all. He had been exploring, something he did more and more often now, wandering the island's paths and cliffs and hidden coves as if searching for something he could not name. He had walked further than usual that afternoon, following a thin stream that wound through a cleft in the cliffs, its water cold and clear and tasting faintly of minerals when he cupped his hands to drink. The stream led him deeper into the interior than he had ever gone before, past stands of flowering trees whose blossoms released a sweet, drowsy perfume, past moss-covered boulders that loomed overhead like the shoulders of buried giants and that was when he saw it.
A dark opening in the rock face, half-hidden by a curtain of flowering vines that spilled down from the cliff above in cascades of white and purple. The vines were thick and tangled, but they did not quite conceal the gap behind them. An opening wide enough for a man to walk through without ducking his head.
He should not have gone in. He knew that, even as his feet carried him forward, even as his hands reached out to push the vines aside. A voice in the back of his mind, the voice that had once belonged to a prince trained in caution and suspicion, whispered that he should turn around and walk back to the sunlit meadow and forget he had ever seen this place. But that voice had grown very quiet in the months he had spent on this island, and something else had grown louder.
The darkness swallowed him whole. He stood motionless for a long moment, waiting for his eyes to adjust, one hand pressed flat against the cool stone of the wall. The passage sloped downward, the floor worn smooth by the passage of time or water or the tread of feet. He could not see more than a few feet ahead, but he could feel the space around him opening up, widening into something larger than a simple tunnel. The air was dry and still, the silence so complete that he could hear his own heartbeat thudding in his ears.
He walked deeper, the passage twisted once, then twice, then opened abruptly into a chamber so vast that Jace's footsteps echoed back to him from walls he could not see. Thin shafts of daylight pierced down through cracks in the ceiling high above, illuminating the space in pale, dusty columns that fell across the floor like the bars of a cage made of light and in those columns of light, Jace saw them.
Armor.
Dozens of sets, perhaps hundreds, arranged against the walls and stacked in corners and laid out on stone slabs that rose from the floor like altars. Breastplates and greaves and gauntlets and helms, their surfaces catching the thin light and throwing it back in dull gleams. Some were polished and gleaming, as if they had been cleaned and oiled with meticulous care. Others were rusted and crumbling, their edges flaking away into red-brown dust, their shapes barely recognizable beneath the corrosion of years or decades or centuries. Swords and axes and spears and maces, their blades dull with age and disuse, their hilts wrapped in leather that had rotted away to nothing.
And clothes, stacks and stacks of clothes, tunics and breeches and cloaks and boots and belts and gloves. They were piled against the walls in drifts that rose nearly to the ceiling, some of them neatly folded as if awaiting a return that would never come, others tossed carelessly into corners in tangled heaps of faded fabric. Some were new, the dyes still bright, the wool still soft, the linen still crisp and clean. Others were ancient and moth-eaten, their threads crumbling at the slightest touch, their colors bleached to ghostly echoes of what they had once been.
Jace stood in the center of the chamber and turned in a slow circle, his breath caught in his throat, his heart hammering against his ribs like a fist beating against a locked door. The scale of it was incomprehensible. There were so many. Too many. More than one person could ever need. More than a dozen people could ever need. More than a hundred people could ever need. This was not a collection. This was a graveyard for the belongings of the dead.
His eyes caught on a breastplate near his feet, and the world tilted sideways, it was newer than the others. Its metal still held a faint gleam beneath a thin layer of dust, and its leather straps were still supple, and on its chest, embossed in silver that caught the light like a blade, was the seahorse of House Velaryon.
He remembered the lead soldier kneeling in the sand, his weathered face breaking into shock and relief. He remembered the feast on the beach, the crackling fire, the roast pork and the wine and your hand in his beneath the table. He remembered waking to find the beach empty and the sea bare and you standing at the mouth of the cave with your head tilted and your brow furrowed, asking him what soldiers he meant, telling him it was only a dream, only a dream, nothing more than a dream.
The soldiers who had never been here. The soldiers he had only imagined. Their armor was lying at his feet.
He stumbled backward. His heel caught on a gauntlet and sent it skittering across the stone floor with a sound like a startled crab. The noise echoed through the chamber and died away into silence, and Jace stood there with his hands shaking and his mind blank with a terror so absolute that it felt almost like calm. He could not think. He could not breathe. He could not make sense of what he was seeing, and some part of him understood with terrible clarity that making sense of it would destroy everything he had built on this island. Every moment of peace. Every hour of love. Every whispered word in the darkness. All of it balanced on the edge of this pit, and if he looked down, if he truly looked, he would fall.
"What are you doing here?"
He spun around so fast that his boots skidded on the stone floor, his heart slammed against his ribs, once, twice, a frantic drumbeat of pure animal terror.. "Nothing. I was only looking, I wanted to understandâ"
"You were only looking." You stepped out of the shadows and into the thin light that filtered down from the cracks in the ceiling, and the expression on your face made his stomach drop. The gentle warmth he had come to love was gone. The softness was gone. Your jaw was tight, the muscles corded beneath your skin, and your hands were clenched into fists at your sides, and your eyes were fixed on him with a glittering intensity that pinned him in place like a butterfly on a board. "At what, precisely? At the belongings of dead men? At the evidence of my sins? At the proof that I am not the gentle, lonely woman you thought you loved?"
Your hands unclenched and clenched again, the fingers curling and uncurling in a rhythm that seemed almost involuntary, as though you were strangling something invisible.
"I asked you a question, Jace." Your voice dropped, soft and dangerous. "What are you doing here?"
He should have been afraid. He was afraid. The hair on the back of his neck was standing up, and his heart was beating so hard he could feel it in his throat, and every instinct he possessed was screaming at him to run. But something else rose up inside him too, some scrap of the prince he used to be, some stubborn remnant of the boy who had faced down enemies on the battlefield and never flinched. He straightened his spine and met your eyes and refused to look away.
"Why are they here?" he asked, gesturing at the armor that surrounded them. "All of these. Dozens of sets. Hundreds, maybe. The soldiers who came for me, their armor is here. The same breastplate, the same sigil. It wasn't a dream was it? What happened to them?"
You stared at him. A muscle in your jaw twitched.
"It does not matter."
"It matters to me."
"It does not matter, Jace." Your voice was rising now, cracking at the edges, splintering into something raw and desperate. "It should not matter, Jace. Those men are gone. Let them stay gone. Let the past stay buried. We were happy. We were so happy. Why could you not leave well enough alone?"
"Because I need to know the truth."
"The truth will not make you happy. The truth will not keep you warm at night. The truth will not hold you when you wake from nightmares and tell you that everything is going to be all right."
"The truth is the truth. I deserve to know it."
You laughed, it was sharp and bitter and jagged, the laugh of someone who had been hurt too many times to believe in fairness anymore. "You sound just like them. Every single one of them. They all wanted the truth. They all thought they deserved to know. And do you know what happened when they found it?"
Jace did not answer. He did not need to answer. The armors answered for him.
"What happened to the soldiers?" he asked instead. His voice was very quiet. "The ones who came for me. The ones whose armor is lying at my feet. What did you do to them?"
Your face crumpled, the coldness shattered and the fury crumbled and underneath it was something far older and far more terrifying, a grief so immense it had calcified into rage over centuries of solitude. The tears that spilled down your cheeks were real, hot and sudden and utterly convincing.
"Why do you want to leave me?" you screamed, the sound echoed off the stone walls and came back multiplied, a chorus of accusations that battered him from every direction. Your voice was raw and ragged, shredded at the edges, and the pain in it was so enormous that Jace felt his own heart clench in response. The anger that had been building in him, the righteous fury at being lied to, began to waver. How could he be angry at someone who was in so much pain? How could he accuse someone who was so clearly suffering?
"Why do you want to leave me?" you cried again, and your voice broke on the last word. "Why do they always leave? Every single one of them, they wash up on my shore and I save them and I nurse them back to health and I give them everything I have, everything I am, and they tell me they love me, they look me in the eyes and they swear they love me, and I believe them every time, every single time I believe them because I am so desperate to be loved by someone, anyone, and then they remember. They always remember. And they always leave. They always want to go home. Why am I never enough? Why am I never enough for anyone?"
The question hung in the air, raw and bleeding. Your chest was heaving. Your hands were shaking. You looked at him with those burning eyes, and Jace felt his resolve crumbling, you were not a monster, you were wounded, a woman who had been abandoned and betrayed so many times that she had forgotten how to trust. How could he blame you for what you had done?
"I love you," he said, and his voice was shaking but he meant it with every fiber of his being. "I love you. I do. I love you more than I have ever loved anyone."
"Then why do you want to leave me?" Your voice was small now, wounded, the fury draining away to reveal the vulnerability beneath. "If you love me, why isn't that enough? Why do you need to go back? Why can't you just stay here with me? Why do you need a mother and brothers and a war and a throne? Why can you not just stay here and be mine?"
"Because I have a family." He was pleading now, hating himself for the pain he was causing you. "Because I have a mother who needs me and brothers who are waiting for me. Because there is a war, a war I was fighting, a war I was supposed to win. Because I have a duty."
"A duty." You laughed, but it was a broken sound, a laugh that was really a sob. "Duty. Honor. Family. I have heard all of this before. Every single one of them said the same thing. They had to go back. They had responsibilities. They had people who needed them. And what about me? What about what I need? I needed them. I loved them. And they left me anyway. They all left me. Just like you will leave me."
"I don't want to leave you," Jace said, and the words felt inadequate, pathetic. "I want to go home, yes. I want to see my mother. I want to protect her from the enemies who would see her dead and her throne stolen. But I want to take you with me. I want you to meet her. I want to marry you properly, before the whole court, with a septon and a cloak and vows spoken in the light of the Seven. I want to make you my queen. When I sit the Iron Throne, you will sit beside me."
He reached for you, desperate to comfort you, to wipe the tears from your cheeks. You did not pull away, but you did not lean into his touch either.
"I do not care what you did to these men," he said, his voice low and fierce. "I do not care what you have done. I love you. I love you more than I have ever loved anything in my life. I just want you to come with me. Please. Come with me."
For a long moment, you were silent, then you shook your head. Slowly. Miserably. With the exhausted certainty of someone who had heard these same promises too many times to count.
"It is not true," you whispered. "They always say this. When my brother sends them here, they always tell me they love me. They always promise they will stay. They look at me with those earnest eyes and they swear they are different from the others, and I believe them. I always believe them. Because I want to believe. Because I want so desperately for it to be true. And then they remember who they were before, and everything changes."
You pulled your hands out of his grip and wrapped your arms around yourself, your shoulders hunching inward as though you were trying to make yourself smaller, harder to hurt. Jace felt a surge of protectiveness so strong it almost knocked the breath out of him. He wanted to hold you. He wanted to shield you from everything that had ever hurt you.
"They remember their old lives," you continued, your voice barely above a whisper, "and they tell me they will save me. They tell me they will break the curse and take me away from here and marry me in a real sept with real vows. They promise me everything I have ever wanted. And for a little while I let myself hope. I let myself believe that this time will be different. This time the love will be real."
Your voice caught on the last word, splintering into something that was almost a sob. Jace felt tears prick at the corners of his own eyes. Gods, how could anyone have done this to you? How could anyone have been so cruel?
"But they never mean it," you said. "They are only saying what they think I want to hear. They are only trying to placate me, to buy themselves time, to find a way to escape. And when they try to break the curse and they fail, when they realize their love is not strong enough, when they understand that they do not really love me at all, they run. They try to leave. And Iâ"
You stopped. Your hands were trembling violently now, the fingers twisting together in front of you.
"What do you do?" Jace asked, though he already knew the answer. He knew it, and it horrified him, and yet somehow he could not bring himself to judge you for it. You had been hurt. You had been betrayed. You had been left alone for so long that you had forgotten what it felt like to be held. How could anyone expect you to react with grace when another man tried to abandon you?
"I do not let them leave." Your voice was barely a whisper, so quiet he had to lean closer to hear it. "They do not get to leave. They do not get to go back to their families and forget about me while I rot here alone. They stay. They stay here with me. Forever."
"The pigs," Jace said.
"They are happier as pigs,"Â Your voice took on a defensive edge, almost childlike in its insistence. "They do not remember their old lives. They do not feel the disappointment. They do not want to leave. They are content. They have food and shelter and each other. I take care of them. I take better care of them than anyone ever took care of me." Your eyes searched his face, looking for understanding, looking for absolution. "They are better off this way. I gave them peace. I gave them a life without pain. Do you know what my brother gave me? Do you know what it feels like to be left here, alone, for centuries, with nothing but the sound of the waves and the crying of the gulls and the knowledge that no one is ever coming for you?"
Jace's throat was dry. "Why did you not do it to me?"
"Because I thought you were different." Your voice was small now, so small it was almost swallowed by the shadows of the cave. "Because when I looked at you, when I held you through the fevers and listened to you talk about your home and your family, I thoughtâI hopedâthat you might really love me." A tear slid down your cheek, and you did not wipe it away. "I thought you would stay."
The guilt hit Jace like a physical blow. You had hoped. You had let yourself hope, despite everything, despite centuries of betrayal and abandonment, and he was about to become just another name on the long list of people who had disappointed you. He was about to leave you, just like all the others. He was about to prove that your hope had been misplaced, that love was a lie, that no one would ever truly choose you.
"I am sorry," he said, and he meant it with every part of himself. "I am so sorry. I do not want to leave you. I want to stay. I want both things. I want to go home, but I want you to come with me. Can I not have both things?"
"No one ever wants both things." You pulled your hands away, and your expression was hardening again, the vulnerability sealing itself back behind walls of old resentment. "They want to leave. They always want to leave. As soon as they remember their old lives, they want to leave. And when they realize they cannot break the curse, they run. They all run. And I have to stop them because if I do not stop them they will leave me alone again, and I cannot be alone again, Jace, I cannot, I would rather die than be alone againâ"
"What curse?" Jace cut through your spiraling words, his voice urgent. "You said they could not break the curse. What curse?"
"It does not matter," you said. Your voice was empty now, drained of all the fury and grief that had filled it moments before. "You are going to leave me too. You are going to try to break the curse, and you are going to fail, because no one has ever succeeded, and then you are going to run. Just like all the others."
"Tell me what the curse is. Please. Let me help you."
You stared at him for a long, long moment. The candles flickered in their alcoves, their flames guttering in a draft he could not feel. The armor gleamed dully in the shadows, the relics of a hundred men who had stood where he was standing now and made the same promises he was making. Somewhere far away, muffled by stone and distance, the pigs grunted in their enclosure. The men who had failed. The men whose love had not been strong enough.
"My brother exiled me here," you said finally. Your voice was flat now, reciting facts rather than feelings, as though you had told this story so many times that the words had lost all meaning. "Centuries ago. So long ago that the world I came from does not exist anymore, and when I disobeyed him, when I refused to do what he asked of me, he put a curse on this island as punishment. I cannot leave. No ship will carry me. No boat will bear my weight. If I try to swim, the sea itself will rise up and drag me back to shore. I am bound here, bound to this rock, until the curse is broken or the world ends."
"How do I break it?"
You looked at him, and your eyes were ancient and exhausted and utterly without hope. Jace felt his heart twist. You had been disappointed so many times. You did not believe he could do it.
"There is a cave," you said. "Behind the waterfall on the western cliff. There is a statue inside, a statue of me carved from black stone, wrapped in chains. I cannot enter the cave. It is spelled against me." Your hand rose unconsciously to your neck, as if feeling for the links of a collar that was not there. "If the statue is broken, the curse will be lifted. The chains will fall. I will be free."
"Then I will break it."
"It is not that simple." Your voice was quiet now, almost gentle, and there was something in it that felt like a warning, a kindness, an attempt to protect him from the disappointment you were certain was coming. "Only a man who knows my true nature can destroy the statue. Only a man who has seen what I am, what I have done, every monstrous thing I have committed in my long and miserable existence, and still loves me truly. Not charmed. Not tricked. Not fogged by the magic of this island. Real love. Clear-eyed love. Love that looks at the worst of me and does not flinch." You paused. "If his love is false, if it is only gratitude or loneliness or the lingering effects of my enchantments, the statue will not break. It will not even crack. And I will know. I will know that his love was a lie."
"I am not them," he said.
"You are. You are exactly like them."
"No." He stepped forward and took your face in his hands, his thumbs brushing the tears from your cheeks. "I am not them. I am going to break the curse. I am going to set you free. I am going to take you away from this island and give you the life you deserve. I swear it."
"You cannot promise that."
"I can. I am." He pressed his forehead against yours. "I love you. I know what you are. I know what you have done. And I love you anyway. I love you not despite the worst of you but because of it. Because the worst of you was born from pain, and I want to heal that pain. I want to be the one who finally proves to you that love is real. That you are worthy of it. That you have always been worthy of it."
You let out a sound that was half laugh and half sob. "You are a fool, Jacaerys Velaryon."
"Take me to the cave behind the waterfall," he said. "Let me prove it."
"Alright," you whispered, as if you had expected him to ask. "I will take you. But do not say I did not warn you."
You turned and walked out of the cave, and Jace followed you, his heart pounding and his mind clear and his love for you burning in his chest like a flame that no wind could extinguish. He was going to save you. He was going to be the one. He was going to prove that love was stronger than any curse, stronger than any magic, stronger than centuries of solitude and betrayal.
He had to be the one. The alternative was unthinkable.
â
The walk was silent, you led him along the familiar path, the meadow with its strange flowers swaying in the breeze, the grove of fruit trees with their golden bounty hanging heavy from the branches, the rocky outcropping that overlooked the western shore where the sea stretched out blue and endless and utterly indifferent to what was about to happen. The waterfall was roaring louder than usual, or perhaps it only seemed that way. Perhaps it was the blood pounding in his ears. Perhaps it was the weight of what he was about to do pressing down on him like a physical thing, a stone laid across his chest that made every breath feel shallow and insufficient.
You stopped at the edge of the pool, where the water churned white with the endless cascade. Your face was pale. Your hands were shaking at your sides, the fingers twisting together in that nervous gesture he had come to recognize, the one that always made him want to pull you into his arms and promise you that everything would be alright.
"There," you said, pointing, Jace squinted through the spray. Behind the curtain of falling water, barely visible through the silver torrent, was a dark opening in the rock face. A cave mouth, smaller than the one you lived in, half-hidden by the cascade. It looked like something that did not want to be found.
"I cannot enter," you said, and your voice was quiet, almost reverent. "The spell prevents me. The moment I step through the water, I am pushed back. It burns." You wrapped your arms around yourself, your fingers digging into the flesh of your upper arms. The gesture was meant to look vulnerable, meant to make him feel protective. It worked. "You have to go alone."
Jace nodded. He had expected this. Of course he had expected this. The hero always had to face the trial alone. That was how these stories went.
"I will come back," he said.
You did not answer. Your eyes were fixed on the waterfall, dark and terrified, and your lower lip trembled just slightly, just enough for him to notice.
"Hey." He touched your chin, turning your face toward him. Your skin was cold beneath his fingers. "I will come back. I promise."
"Everyone promises." Your voice was barely a whisper, and there was something in it that snagged at his heart like a fishhook. "Everyone who has ever stood on this shore has promised to come back."
"I am not everyone."
He kissed your lips and for just a moment he felt something move beneath the surface. A flicker. A pulse. Something that was not quite human. Then the moment passed, and you were just you again, fragile and frightened and looking at him with those sea-glass eyes that held all the sadness in the world.
He turned away before he could lose his nerve. He dove into the pool, and the water closed over his head like a fist.
The cold was shocking. It was more than cold. It was the absence of warmth, the absence of life, a cold that sank into his bones and wrapped around his heart and squeezed. He surfaced gasping, his breath torn from his lungs in a ragged gasp, and swam toward the waterfall with strong, desperate strokes. The roar grew louder as he approached, a wall of sound that pressed against his eardrums until he could hear nothing else. The spray blinded him, stinging his eyes, filling his mouth with the taste of minerals and stone. The current tried to push him back, tried to shove him away from the cave entrance as if the water itself did not want him to pass.
But he kept swimming. He had promised. He had promised he would come back, he reached the rock face and pulled himself up onto a narrow ledge, slick with moss and running water, his fingers scrabbling for purchase on the wet stone. The cave entrance yawned before him, dark and silent and somehow hungry, as if the darkness itself was waiting for him to step inside. He looked back once. You were still standing at the edge of the pool, a pale figure in a pale dress, your hands pressed to your mouth. You looked like a ghost. You looked like a memory of someone who had died a long time ago.
Then he turned and walked into the darkness.
â
The cave was small, smaller than he had expected. The passage was short, barely twenty paces, the walls rough and wet beneath his trailing fingers, the floor sloping downward into the heart of the rock. The roar of the waterfall faded behind him, muffled by the stone, until the only sound was the drip of water and the soft scuff of his bare feet on the rock and the steady, insistent pounding of his own heart.
The passage opened into a round chamber no larger than your bedchamber back in the main cave. The walls were smooth and wet, glistening with moisture, catching the light and throwing it back in a thousand tiny reflections. The only illumination came from somewhere above, a thin shaft of daylight that pierced through a crack in the rock and fell in a single golden beam onto the center of the chamber. It was like something out of a sept, that beam of light. It was like the light that fell on an altar, or a tomb, or a place where something sacred had been buried and forgotten.
And in the center of the chamber was the statue.
It was you, smooth and luminous, carved with such skill that it seemed almost alive. The surface of the stone had been polished to a soft gleam, catching the golden light and holding it, and the details were so fine that Jace could see the individual strands of hair. The statue knelt on a stone pedestal, its head bowed in an attitude of submission or prayer, its face frozen in an expression of such profound sorrow that Jace felt his chest tighten just looking at it. The eyes were closed. The lips were slightly parted, as if caught in the middle of a sigh. The shoulders were hunched forward, the spine curved, every line of the body speaking of exhaustion and despair and the weight of an eternity spent alone.
And the hands, the statue's hands were raised in front of its chest, palms facing each other, fingers slightly curled as if holding something invisible. And around those marble wrists, coiled so tightly they seemed to be part of the stone itself, were two snakes.
No. Not snakes. Bracelets. Golden bracelets, each one shaped like a serpent eating its own tail. But the serpents were not connected to each other. They were separate, independent, each one locked around a single wrist, each one devouring itself in an endless cycle of consumption and renewal. Their golden eyes gleamed in the shaft of daylight, bright and watchful and aware. Their scales were so finely detailed that Jace could count every one, each scale overlapping the next in perfect, reptilian precision. Their jaws were clamped tight around their own tails, and their bodies were wound around the marble wrists in coils that looked tight enough to bruise.
They were not chains. Not exactly. They were something worse. They were a trap that could not be escaped because there was nothing to break. The snakes held her wrists, and her wrists held the snakes, and neither could let go, and the whole thing was a perfect, closed loop of imprisonment that had no beginning and no end.
Jace stood in the darkness at the edge of the chamber, staring at the statue. His heart was pounding so hard he could feel it in his throat, in his temples, in the tips of his fingers. His hands were slick with water and sweat. The marble figure knelt in its beam of light, motionless and patient, and the golden snakes watched him with their glittering eyes, and the silence was so complete that he could hear the blood rushing through his own veins.
He bent down and picked up a rock from the floor of the cave. It was heavy, sharp-edged, big enough to do damage. He turned it over in his hands, testing its weight, feeling the rough edges bite into his palm. Break the statue. Break the curse. Simple. You had told him what to do. You had told him it was simple.
He took a step toward the pedestal.
"Are you quite certain about this?"
Jace froze, the voice was male. Low and smooth and echoing, seeming to come from everywhere and nowhere at once. It bounced off the wet stone walls, slid through the darkness, coiled around him like smoke, like water, like something that had been waiting in the shadows for a very long time. It was not a human voice. It was too resonant for that, too layered, as if many voices were speaking at once in perfect, dissonant harmony.
"Who is there?" Jace demanded. His voice sounded too loud in the silence, too harsh, too frightened. He hated how frightened he sounded.
No answer. Just the dripping of water. The distant, muffled roar of the falls.
"You should think very carefully before you do something you will regret for the rest of your life. Which, I should warn you, may not be very long."
Jace spun around, the rock raised like a weapon. The chamber was empty. The passage behind him was empty. The shadows pressed against the walls, still and silent and utterly unoccupied.
"I said who is there?"
"A friend." The voice was almost gentle now, almost kind. It was the voice of a father speaking to a wayward son, a mentor guiding a confused student. "Someone who does not want to see you make a mistake you cannot undo. Someone who has watched this same scene play out more times than I can count, and who is very, very tired of seeing young men throw their lives away."
Jace's grip tightened on the rock. The edges cut into his palm, grounding him. "Show yourself."
"I cannot. I am not really here. I am just a voice in the dark. A warning. A kindness, if you will let me be." The voice paused, and when it spoke again, it was softer. Sadder. "I am the only person on this island who is actually trying to help you, Jacaerys."
"Don't listen to it," Jace muttered to himself. He turned back toward the statue. "It's just another part of the curse. It's trying to stop you. She said there would be things trying to stop you."
"Is that what she told you?" The voice sounded amused now, deeply and darkly amused. "That the curse is the villain? That she is the victim? How very convenient for her. How very convenient that she has a story that makes her the helpless damsel and everyone else the monster. She tells that story very well. She has had centuries of practice."
Jace ignored it. He stepped closer to the pedestal. The marble woman knelt in her beam of light, motionless and sorrowful. The golden snakes glinted.
"She is very beautiful, isn't she?" the voice continued, and now it was almost conversational, almost casual, as if they were two old friends discussing the weather. "Of course she is. She's had centuries to perfect the act. The dresses. The smiles. The way she looks at you like you are the only man in the world, like you are the answer to every prayer she has ever whispered into the darkness. It is all very convincing. It is meant to be. She has been refining it for longer than your entire bloodline has existed."
"You do not know anything about her."
"I know everything about her." The voice was sharper now, the amusement draining away to reveal something harder underneath. "I know what she is. I know what she has done. I know how many men have stood exactly where you are standing now, holding a rock just like that one, thinking they were going to be the one. The special one. The one whose love was strong enough." A pause, heavy with meaning. "Do you know how many of them succeeded?"
Jace did not answer.
"None. Not one. In all the centuries she has been trapped on this island, not a single man has broken that statue. Do you know why? Because it cannot be broken. It is a trap. It is the bait, and you are the fish, and you are swimming toward it with your mouth wide open."
"You are lying." Jace's voice was shaking now. He hated that it was shaking. "You are just another part of the curse. You are trying to stop me from freeing her."
"I am trying to stop you from destroying yourself." The voice was closer now, seeming to come from just behind his left shoulder. He spun around, but there was nothing there. Only shadows. Only the dripping of water. "Let me ask you something, Jacaerys. Can you remember your mother's name?"
He opened his mouth but nothing came out, the name was gone. It had been there a moment ago, he was sure of it. He could see her face, silver hair and sad eyes, could feel the shape of her in his memory. But the name, the name would not come.
"Your brothers," the voice continued, relentless and calm. "How many brothers do you have? What are their names?"
"I have brothers. I know I have brothers." His voice sounded desperate, even to his own ears. "Luke-Lucerys. And the others. The little ones."
"You are reciting words. You are not remembering. She has taken them from you, piece by piece, day by day. She has been stealing your memories since the moment you arrived. The food she feeds you. The wine she pours you. The herbs she puts in your medicine. They do not just heal your wounds. They erase you. They hollow you out. They make room for her."
Jace's mind was blank. Empty. There was nothing there but fog, thick and white and impenetrable, where his memories should have been.
"She has taken them from you," the voice said, and now it was almost gentle again, almost pitying. "Piece by piece. Day by day. Every moment you spend in her presence, she is stealing more of who you are. Your family. Your home. Your past. Your very self. And you call that love? You think that is what love looks like?"
"She saved my life."
"She kept you alive because she needed you. There is a difference. She needs a man to break the curse. She always needs a man to break the curse. That is how it works. That is how it has always worked. She lures them in with her beauty and her vulnerability and her sad, sad story, and she makes them love her, and then she sends them here to die. Because no one can break the curse. No one. The statue does not break. It has never broken. And when the man fails, when he realizes his love is not strong enough, she has her excuse. She was right all along. No one really loves her. So she turns them into pigs and waits for the next shipwreck, the next castaway, the next fool who will believe her lies."
He kept going "You think that is love?" The voice laughed, a soft and pitying laugh. "You think a woman who erases your past and steals your future and traps you on an island where you can never leave loves you? You think any of this is real?"
"I love her." Jace's voice cracked. "I know I love her. That is real. Whatever else she has done, my love for her is real."
"Oh, it feels real. I am sure it does. But do you know why it feels real?" The voice paused, letting the question hang in the darkness. "Because she makes it feel real. That is what she does. That is what the magic does. It wraps around your mind and makes you think you are feeling something true. But it is not true, Jacaerys. It is a trick. A trap. You have been ensnared since the moment you opened your eyes in that candlelit room and saw her kneeling beside your bed like a worried bride."
Jace's arm was lowering. The rock felt heavier now, so heavy he could barely hold it. His hands were shaking. His whole body was shaking.
"She told me you would say things like this," he said, but his voice was weak. Uncertain. "She told me the curse would try to stop me. She warned me there would be voices."
"The curse is not stopping you. I am not the curse. I am the only thing standing between you and an eternity of rooting in the dirt with all the other men who believed her lies." The voice was right next to his ear now, so close he could feel the cold breath of it against his skin. "Do you want to know the real story, Jacaerys? Do you want to know who she really is?"
He did not answer. He did not want to know. He wanted to cover his ears and run back through the waterfall and hold you in his arms and forget this voice had ever spoken to him. But his feet would not move. His body would not obey him.
"She is not a victim," the voice whispered. "She is not a lonely woman trapped by a cruel brother. That is a story she invented centuries ago because it makes men feel protective. It makes them feel noble. It makes them want to save her. The truth is much simpler, and much uglier. She is a goddess, a thing that was worshipped before your ancestors crawled out of the mud. And she was imprisoned here not as punishment, but as containment. Because she is dangerous. Because she feeds on devotion the way a spider feeds on flies."
"You are lying."
"Am I? If you break that statue," the voice said, "she will be free. And the moment she is free, she will have no more use for you. Her love for you, such as it is, will vanish. It is not real love, Jacaerys. It is bait. It is a lure. It is the promise of everything you have ever wanted, dangled in front of you to make you do what she needs. And once you have done it, once you have served your purpose, she will discard you like all the others."
"Stop." Jace's voice cracked on the word.
"That is the part she did not tell you, is it not? She did not tell you that her love is conditional. She did not tell you that it lasts only as long as she is trapped. The moment she is free, the magic breaks both ways. The chains fall from her wrists, and her love for you falls with them."
"You are lying." Jace's voice was a raw whisper, barely audible over the distant roar of the waterfall. "You are the curse. You are trying to stop me from freeing her."
"She told every man before you the exact same story. Word for word. The cruel brother. The lonely exile. The curse that can only be broken by true love. She told it to the knight in rusted armor whose bones are rotting in that cave. She told it to the merchant captain whose shield is propped against the wall. And you are just the latest audience."
"Stop."
"She does not love you. She cannot love you. She is not capable of love. She is capable of hunger, and she calls it love because that is what makes men stay. But it is not love. It has never been love. It is just need. Just appetite. Just the endless, grinding loneliness of a creature that consumes everything it touches and is still never full."
Jace opened his eyes. The statue knelt in its beam of light. The golden snakes watched him with their glittering, knowing eyes. The marble face was frozen in its expression of eternal sorrow.
What if the voice was right?
What if none of it was real?
What if he broke the statue, and your love disappeared, and he spent the rest of his life chasing a ghost?
What if he was just the next fool in line?
"Go back," the voice whispered. "Go back to the beach. Build your boat. Leave this place while you still can. While you still remember enough of yourself to want to leave. She will try to stop you. She will cry and plead and tell you she loves you. But it will be a lie. It has always been a lie. Go back, Jacaerys. Go home. Save yourself."
â
You had been waiting for hours. You stood at the edge of the pool, your bare feet sinking into the damp sand, your eyes fixed on the curtain of falling water. The roar of the waterfall filled your ears until you could hear nothing else, but you were listening for something beneath the roar. A shout. A crash. The sound of stone breaking. The sound of a man drowning.
Anything. Please, anything.
Jace surfaced at the edge of the pool, gasping, his dark hair plastered to his forehead, his skin slick with water and gleaming in the sunlight. He pulled himself onto the sand, his chest heaving, his arms trembling with exhaustion, and for a moment he just knelt there on his hands and knees, catching his breath, water streaming from his body in rivulets. You just stared at him, searching his face for some sign of what had happened, some clue in the set of his jaw or the light in his eyes. Was the curse broken? Had he succeeded? Had he been the one, the only one, the man whose love was finally strong enough?
"I did it," he said, and his voice was warm and triumphant and full of a joy you had never heard from him before. "I broke the curse."
You stumbled forward, your legs barely supporting you, your hands reaching for him before your mind had fully registered what he had said. "Youâyou did? It is broken? I am free?"
"You are free." He rose to his feet, still smiling, and opened his arms to you. "You are free, Y/N. We can leave. Together. Just like I promised."
A sob tore from your throat, raw and jagged and utterly involuntary. You threw yourself into his arms, your body shaking, tears streaming down your face in hot, messy rivulets. He caught you and held you tight, his hands warm on your back, his lips pressing kisses to your hair, your temple, your cheek, his voice murmuring reassurances that you could barely hear over the pounding of your own heart.
"I love you," you gasped, the words tumbling out between sobs, unstoppable, irrepressible. "I love you, I love you, I love youâ"
"I love you too." His voice was soft. Tender. Everything you had ever wanted to hear. "I told you I would save you. I told you I was different. I told you I was not like the others."
He kissed you, it was a deep kiss, a passionate kiss, the kind of kiss that spoke of relief and joy and a future finally within reach. You melted into him, your body pressing against his, your hands sliding up his chest, his shoulders, his neck, tangling in his wet hair. The waterfall roared behind you, but it sounded different now, less like a threat and more like applause. The sun was warm on your skin, warmer than it had ever been. You were free. You were finally, impossibly free. After centuries of solitude, centuries of hoping and losing and hoping again, someone had finally loved you enough.
You did not notice anything until you felt the cold metal snap shut against your skin, you tore away from him, stumbling backward, your hand flying to your wrist. Something was there. Something heavy and cold and horribly, sickeningly familiar. You looked down, and the world stopped.
A golden snake. Coiled around your forearm, its tail clamped in its own jaws, its scales gleaming in the sunlight with a wet, organic sheen. Its eyes were bright and watchful and alive. It was warm against your skin, warm like something that had a heartbeat, warm like something that was feeding.
Identical to the ones in the cave. Identical to the ones that had bound the statue for centuries, the statue that was supposed to be destroyed, the statue that he had told you he had broken.
But the statue was not destroyed. You knew that now with a cold, creeping certainty. He had not broken it. He had done something else. Something worse.
"Whatâ" Your voice came out strangled, barely a whisper, the words catching in your throat like bones. "What is this?"
Jace was still standing by the water's edge. His smile was gone. His face had changed, shifted into something you did not recognize. The warmth in his eyes had drained away, replaced by something flat and cold and terribly, terribly calm. He looked at you the way a scholar might look at a pinned insect, curious and detached and utterly without feeling.
He raised his own arm.
The matching snake was coiled around his wrist. Twin to yours. Identical in every detail, from the curve of the scales to the glint of the golden eyes. Linked by nothing visible. Linked all the same. You could feel it, the connection between them, an invisible chain that stretched from your wrist to his and bound you together tighter than any iron ever could.
"I could not break the curse," he said. His voice was calm. Too calm. The voice of a man who had made a decision and was at peace with it. "The statue would not break. I struck it with the rock, and the rock shattered. I struck it with my fists, and my knuckles bled. I threw myself against it, and it did not even crack." He paused, his dark eyes fixed on yours, unblinking. "The voice, your brother, he told me the truth. He told me what you really are. He told me what you have done. He told me what you would do to me the moment you were free."
"No." You shook your head, backing away from him. Your wrist was burning where the snake touched your skin, a cold fire that spread up your arm and into your chest. "No, Jace, whatever he told you, it is a lie. It is always a lie. He is trying to trap you, he is trying to turn you against meâ"
"Is it a lie?" He tilted his head, regarding you with that terrible calm. "He told me the curse made me love you. He told me you have been feeding on my devotion since the moment I opened my eyes. He told me you would leave me the instant you were free."
"That is not true!" You were screaming now, your voice raw and cracking. "I love you! I have never loved anyone the way I love you! You have to believe me!"
"Then why can I not remember my mother's name?" His voice cracked on the word mother, just slightly, and beneath the coldness you saw something flicker. Something wounded. Something that still hurt. "Why can I not remember my brothers' faces? Why did I wake up this morning and realize that I could not recall the sound of my father's voice, or the color of my brother's eyes, or the name of the dragon I rode into battle? You took everything from me. Everything I was. Everything I loved. You hollowed me out and filled me with yourself, and you expected me to believe it was love?"
"I did not mean to!" You were sobbing now, the tears hot and bitter on your cheeks. "I did not want to take your memories, i loved you so much i did not want you to leave me."
"You loved being loved." His voice was flat. Final. "There is a difference."
You stared at him. Your chest was heaving. Your wrist was throbbing, the golden snake pulsing against your skin like a second heartbeat. You could feel it now, the thing that bound you together. It was not just a chain. It was a tether. A leash.
"The statue forced you to have a physical body," Jace said, and his voice had shifted again, becoming almost conversational. Almost pleasant. "You are not mortal. You are not human something that was bound to this island and trapped in the stone. The chains kept you here. The statue kept you solid. Touchable. Real." He paused. "Without the statue, you would have no body. You would be nothing but mist and memory. Is that not what your brother wanted? To keep you contained? To keep you in a form that could touch and taste and take?"
You did not answer. You could not answer. Your throat had closed around the words.
"I could not break the curse," Jace said, and he took a step toward you, his bare feet silent on the sand. "I could not destroy the statue. But I could transfer it. I could take the chains off the stone and put them onto something else. Something living. Something that could carry them." He raised his arm again, showing you the snake coiled around his wrist, and his smile returned. It was not a kind smile. "You are not bound to the island anymore. You are bound to me."
The world tilted. The roar of the waterfall seemed to fade, replaced by a high, thin ringing in your ears. The sun was too bright. The sand was too soft. The golden snake was too warm against your skin.
"Youâ" Your voice would not work. "You did notâ"
"I did." He was still calm. Still cold. Still looking at you with those eyes that used to be so full of love. "The voice told me it was the only way. The only way to make sure you could not leave me. The only way to make sure your love was real. The only way to be certain that when I woke up tomorrow, you would still be there, and the day after that, and the day after that."
"You trapped me."
He laughed. It was a soft laugh, a quiet laugh, but there was nothing warm in it. "I freed you. You can leave the island now. The chains that bound you to this rock are gone. You can walk onto a ship and sail away and see the world again. Is that not what you wanted? Is that not what you have been begging me for since the moment we met?"
"You bound me to you!"
"And you bound me to you first." His voice sharpened, the calm cracking for just a moment to reveal the fury underneath. "You made me love you. You made me forget my own mother's name. You drugged my food and whispered in my ear and wrapped yourself around my mind so tightly I could not tell where you ended and I began. You trapped me on this island long before I ever trapped you. The only difference is that my chains were made of kisses and lies, and yours are made of gold."
"I loved you!" The words tore from your throat, raw and ragged. "I loved you! Everything I did, I did because I loved you!"
"You made me forget my mother's name," he said again, and his voice was quieter now, almost sad. "Do you understand what that means? Do you understand what you took from me? She is out there somewhere, fighting a war, grieving a son she believes is dead, and I cannot remember her name. I cannot remember her face. I know I love her. I know I owe her everything. But when I try to picture her, there is nothing there. Just fog. Just you."
You opened your mouth, but no words came. What could you possibly say? What defense could you offer that would not sound hollow and selfish and monstrous?
"You stole my memories and drugged my food and lied to me for months," Jace continued, and now he was walking toward you, closing the distance between you with slow, deliberate steps. "You let me believe I was going home. You let me build a boat I was never going to finish. You let me dream of a future that did not exist. And when I found out the truth, when I confronted you in that cave full of dead men's armor, what did you do? Did you apologize? Did you offer to help me leave? No. You cried. You made yourself the victim. You told me how lonely you were, how sad you were, how much you had suffered. You made me comfort you. You made me feel guilty for discovering your lies."
He stopped in front of you, close enough that you could feel the heat of his body, close enough that you could see the pulse beating in his throat. "And I did feel guilty," he said. "I felt so guilty that I almost forgot what you had done. I almost let myself believe that you were the victim. That I was the one who had wronged you by wanting to go home. That is how good you are at this. That is how deep your hooks go."
"Please." Your voice was barely a whisper now. "Please, Jace, I am sorry. I am so sorry. I never meant to hurt you. I only wanted to be loved. I only wantedâ"
"I know what you wanted." He reached up and touched your face, his fingers gentle against your tear-streaked cheek. The gesture was almost tender. Almost loving. It made your skin crawl. "You wanted someone to stay. You wanted someone to choose you. And now someone has. I have chosen you. I have chosen you over my family, over my throne, over my memories, over everything I ever was. I have given up my entire life to be with you. Are you not happy? Is this not what you wanted?"
"You have made me your prisoner."
"I have made you my equal." His thumb traced the curve of your cheekbone, wiping away a tear. "We are connected now. Bound together. What happens to one of us happens to the other. If you leave, I will feel it. If you try to run, I will know. And if you try to hurt meâ" He shrugged. "The snakes will not let you. They protect what they hold. That is what the voice told me."
"The voice. He told you to do this?"
"He gave me a choice. Break the statue, free you, and watch you leave me the moment we set foot on the mainland. Or bind you to me, keep you close, and never wonder again whether your love was real." His smile returned, and it was the saddest smile you had ever seen. "It was not a difficult choice. I love you. I cannot lose you. So I made sure I would never have to."
You stared at him. The man you loved. The man who had just destroyed you. The man who had looked at your chains and decided to put them on himself rather than break them, because he could not bear the thought of you walking free.
"This is not love," you whispered. "This is possession."
"Is there a difference?" He tilted his head, his dark eyes glittering. "You tell me. You have been doing this for centuries. You tell me where love ends and possession begins. You tell me whether what you felt for me was really love, or just the desperate hunger of a lonely creature who needed someone, anyone, to fill the void. You tell me whether I am any different from you, or whether I am just the first man who was willing to sink to your level."
You opened your mouth. Closed it. The words would not come.
"Exactly," Jace said. "You cannot tell me. Because you do not know either. Because you have been confusing love and hunger for so long that you cannot tell them apart anymore. And now I am the same. You have made me the same." He leaned closer, his lips brushing your ear. "We are equals now. Partners. Two monsters bound together for eternity. Is that not romantic? Is that not what you always wanted? Someone who would never leave you, never abandon you, never choose anything over you?"
"You are insane," you breathed.
"I am what you made me." He pulled back and looked into your eyes, and his expression was unreadable. "You wanted me to stay. I am staying. You wanted me to love you. I love you. You wanted me to be different from the others. I am different. I am the one who did not run. I am the one who looked at the chains and chose to wear them. I am the one who gave up everything to be with you." He cupped your face in both hands, gentle and terrible and utterly inescapable. "Why are you not happy? If you really loved me, you would be happy. This is what you wanted. This is what you have been asking for since the moment we met. Someone who would stay. Someone who would choose you. Someone who would never leave."
He kissed your forehead, and his lips were warm, and the golden snake pulsed against your wrist like a second heart.
"I am going to build us a boat," he said. "A real one this time. One that can carry us both back to Westeros. And you are going to meet my mother, and I am going to take back my throne, and you are going to be my queen. Just like I promised. Just like we planned. The only difference is that now I know you will not leave me. Now I know your love is real. Because it has to be. Because you have no choice." He pulled back and smiled, and his smile was beautiful and broken and utterly terrifying. "You are free now, Y/N. Free from the island. Free from your brother's curse. Free from the statue and the chains and the centuries of solitude. You can go anywhere you want. You can do anything you want. The whole world is open to you." He took your hand, the one with the golden snake coiled around the wrist, and pressed it to his chest, over his heart. "As long as you never leave my side."
You looked down at the snake. At his hand holding yours. At the invisible chain that stretched between you, unbreakable and eternal.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
â Live Streamingâ Interactive Chatâ Private Showsâ HD Qualityâ Free Actions
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
in which jack abbot is the first to notice the wallflower resident of the ER.
summary; reader has always been used to being left behind, and eventually stopped trying to make space for themselves. she doesn't think anyone notices her, until jack abbot starts paying attention.
warnings; fem!reader. use of y/n, use of she/her, probably medical inaccuracies bc all my medical knowledge comes from shows lol, also NO AI used !!! i use em dashes sometimes but i PROMISE this is strictly a no-ai account!! also reader has a cat bc i said so
i might make a part two of this tbh but i wont label it as a series bc then my brain will start procastinating and i'll lose all motivation to write it LOL
The noise of the ER buzzed around you. The muscles in your neck ached, begging to be stretched and massaged. One of your hands came up to gently rub on your neck, the other slowly typing out the chart of your latest patient.
Some of the interns were huddled together, giggling to each other about something. It had become a habit of yours to listen in on themâ on whatever gossip they had going on this time. Sometimes, you liked to pretend that you were part of it. That you got to gossip with friends just like they do.
That'd never been the case for you. In your intern year, you were the only one. Already feeling alienated, you struggled to find your place in the ER. Everyone seemed to already know who they were, aside from you.
For a while, you tried. You tried to include yourself. You joined the others when they went for a beer after a heavy shift. But as time went on, you didn't feel any closer to belonging. It didn't feel like anyone was making room for you either. So, you stopped showing up. And no one said anything.
Now, you just worked. You took all the patients no one else wanted. You stayed a little later to make sure another coworker could get home on time. You helped in traumas, then slipped away as soon as it was done.
This routine worked. It'd been your routine for years now. It wasn't that you were a bad doctor, no. You just didn't fit in.
A small wince covered your features as you rubbed your neck again. You truly couldn't wait to get off shift, and go home. You know your cat must already be sitting on the kitchen counter, waiting for the sight of you walking through the door.
"Nice catch, earlier." You heard a gruff voice behind youâ one you recognized as your attending, Jack Abbot. Being the eavesdropper you are, you waited to hear the response of the person he was complimenting. You wondered if they'd be humble or gleeful. You know that if you were complimented like that, you'd be over the moon.
The light of the monitor made your eyes burn a little, but you just had to push through this last chart.
Then, you felt a hand tap your shoulder.
"Kid?" Dr. Abbot hummed, looking down at you, the corner of his lips quirking into a small smile. "Did'ya hear me?"
Your eyes go wide, and you swear you can feel your heart jumping up into your throat, making your breath hitch. He was talking to you. No one ever bothered talking to you, not if it wasn't necessary.
"Iâ er- sorry, what did you say, Dr. Abbot?" You cleared your throat, trying to get your heart to return to a normal pace, the chart all forgotten now.
He watched you for a moment, his gaze softening from playful to a more gentle one. "I said..." His hands gripped both ends of his stethoscope, the one he always had around his neck, "Good catch earlier. With the silent heart attack patient. Not many of us could've caught that."
The apples of your cheeks shifted into a deep red color, your eyes darting from him to your keyboard, then to your water bottle, the floor, keyboard, him...
"Oh- um, yeah, thank you, sir." You nodded in response, already mentally degrading yourself for being so awkward. This is your attending, for gods sake. You should be professional.
But that easy grin rested on his face, and he nodded. "Oh, sure, kid. You're one hell of a doctor. Keep it up." He gently squeezed your shoulder, and walked off. And that was that. He complimented you like it was nothing.
That simple compliment swam in your head the entire day. It made you smile as you prepared your lunch for work at home that evening. It made you hum with content as you settled into bed, curtains drawn shut to hide the rising sun.
Good catch earlier.
It started happening more and more. Abbot would pull you into traumas with him, let you take the lead on them, and then give you a small compliment, and one of those warm smiles. He'd linger when you charted, always trying to spark up small talk.
You never came out of your shell, though. It was driving him insane. He tried everything. But you always shut it down and got back to work. For a while, he thought you might just dislike him. But he could see the small smiles you gave him, and the pink tint in your cheeks at his compliments.
So, he tried asking the other residents about you. Imagine his shock when no one knew anything about you. Everyone just responded off-handedly.
'Oh, Y/N? Yeah, she's a quiet one. Dunno much about her.'
'Y/N? Great doctor. Haven't talked to her much.'
'Saw her a few times in her first year of residency. Then she stopped coming out.'
No one knew anything. That's what made Jack perk up a little more. He tried to subtly keep notes on you throughout the day. See who you spoke to. If maybe you left with someone. Maybe discussed patients. But he got nothing.
You were all alone.
The last straw was when he spotted you slipping into the abandoned wing of the hospital, settling yourself on the dusty staircase, and opening your lunchbox. You even hid away to eat.
He had to fix that.
So, he became a little more persistent. He'd ask you to eat lunch with him, and before you had a chance to decline, he'd already led you into the breakroom, making you sit down with one pinned stare.
He could tell you were a little anxious. So he always made the first move. He'd ask questions that required more than a nod for an answer, just to get you talking. And he would listen. Full attention, eyes glued to you the entire time you spoke.
No dismissive nods, no hums of acknowledgement in a way to just make you feel heard, no. He made sure you knew he was listening. When you mentioned your cat, he asked for its name. He asked to see pictures. When you made an offhanded complaint about the hospital coffee, he asked what your favorite coffee place was.
The next day, a coffee from said place was waiting for you.
you go to him for nearly every problem you have. flat tire? shane will fix it up for you. can't pay your rent? shane's got you covered. professor gave you a bad grade? shane will talk some sense into him. you can't count how many times in a week he says to you, "i'll take care of it" with a quick kiss to your forehead.
that's what you love so much about him, he's a provider, you never have to worry because of him. it's funny to see him grumble about doing something for you, when really he likes feeling like he's needed. calls you his "needy thing" <3
Hear me out.. clingy dex that genuinely hangs on to you as if attached at the hip like anytime you leave a room no matter what time it is, could be in the middle of the night, he simply will just follow you around like a dog just waiting for you to turn your attention to him đââď¸
dex is so clingy you can't convince me otherwise.
he's like a newborn puppy in the way he follows you literally everywhere. he just finds so much comfort in being with you, having his eyes on you at all times.
like when you get up in the middle of the night to get water. you stir awake and already feel the heavy weight of his body draped over yours, a sheen of sweat coating his skin. you literally have to maneuver your way out from underneath him, receiving a few sleepy groans from him in return.
you think he slept through you pushing his body off of yours, padding to the kitchen and fixing yourself a glass of water, standing in the silence to drink it when you suddenly hear his voice behind you. "why'd you leave?" of course, a large man suddenly appearing behind you scares the shit out of you.
you jump, turning around and seeing his puppy-like expression, standing there in just his boxers looking like you just abandoned him on the side of the road. you really don't know how he manages to make you feel so guilty for something as simple as getting up during the night.
"jesus, dex..." you sigh deeply, voice coated in exhaustion. "jus' had to get water, baby" you coo at him, not wanting to upset him even more than you have.
his eyebrows furrow in response, "could've woken me up..." he reaches out for you, interlacing his warm fingers with yours. he knows damn well he was drooling all over your tits not even 10 minutes ago, he probably wouldn't have let you leave the bed if you woke him up.
+ he loooves watching you shower, not even really in a sexual way. just loves keeping his lovesick gaze on you while you wash your hair, shave your legs, anything. he's enamored. it's so comforting, you let him talk to you while you scrub at your body, sometimes even let him hold your hand.
Š mayhemi | all rights reserved.
a/n: love clingy dex i want to write for this infinitely
Tags: Very mildly NSFW, oral fixation, Mentions of public masturbation, Evan wants that cookie BAD.
â Okay so. This is really short, kinda bad, and ends REALLY abruptly but I wanted to post at least something. Random waves of inspiration are the only thing keeping me going. More Evan is to be had but (probably) NOT before I finish my current Habit WIP.
Evan has a major oral fixation.
He chews on the caps of pens and the erasers of pencils. Plastic straws, ice chips, maybe the lip of a styrofoam cup stolen from Vinnyâs house. Even his fingers are subjected to being gnawed on when nothing else is available.
It's really a mindless habit. Something he doesn't even notice he does until you point it out.
And when you do, Evan feels like it gets 10 times worse.
Heâs not sure if itâs because the behaviour is now conscious, or if itâs because the fixation shifts entirely onto you.
Not like it wasnât before, donât get him wrong. Every time youâre sitting across from him, or really in any spot where he can stare at your lips, he starts absentmindedly chewing on his own. To mirror you, or maybe to try and guess the taste of your chapstick. How the balm would smear against his own lips.
But now, itâs borderline uncontrollable.
To make things worse, Evan thinks you know.
Because, when have you ever been one to chew on pen caps or popsicle sticks? Thatâs his thing. You do it with your chapstick, too. You apply it way more often now, always in a heavier coat and pop your lips together afterwards.
Evan tries not to think about how many flavours you have, and how heâd let you use him as a taste tester for all of them.
A little while agoâEvan canât even remember, thatâs how distracted he wasâYou walked out of a vintage candy store with a huge pack of pixy stix. Enough to feed a family of seven, heâs pretty sure Vinny said, if they all donât drop dead before that.
You smiled, and tore into the packaging with no hesitation.
Evan will never, and he means never ever forget how you ripped open the little sugar stick with your teeth. Some of it spilt out onto your bottom lip only to be immediately licked up, and after your seventh stick of the night, you stuck out your blue-stained tongue to Evan. Afterwards, he had to rub one out in Vinnyâs car. His cum is still smeared into the back of the driverâs seat. Thatâs something heâs decided to take to the grave.
Evanâs also always been a touchy-feely person. Respectfully, of course, regardless of the person. Except when with you, which he thinks about when lying in bed.
A few days ago, everyone went down to the lake. It was a last-minute decision kind of thing as summer was about to come to a close. You were sitting next to him on the least-broken picnic table, pushed into Evanâs side and cheek smushed into his shoulder. He vividly remembers the smell of your lake-water seeped hair, and your pretty smile before you bit him.
Not hard. Just on his shoulder, but it was a first. He yelped and playfully pushed you away, only to keep you from seeing (or feeling) the near immediate hard-on he got.
Getting hard over the memory of biting one of your best friends isnât exactly awe-inspiring. The next day, Evan had trouble meeting your eyes, but definitely not your lips. Not the way you kept darting your tongue out to re-wet them. Forgot your chapstick, you said. Evan knew that was a lie, considering you had five in your bag at all times.
Maybe Evanâs just a pervert. He sure feels that way now, thinking about biting along your chest or licking up against your neck. Sucking hickeys into your thighs, forcing your fingers down his throat as you grind against himâ
âEvan? Hello?â You say, and Evan blinks back.
Jesus, right. Youâre just trying to play Left 4 Dead 2, and here he is, trying not to get another boner. âRightâYeah, whatâs up?â Evan runs a hand through his hair, if only to try and snap himself out of whatever heâs got going on.
You snicker, âYour controllerâs dead.â You hurl the piece of black plastic at him, landing with a thump on his thigh.
âRight. Iâll go get some batteries.â
It takes Evan a little over six minutes to return. When you ask, because of course you do, he says he had to look around for them. Something about no one puts the batteries in the right place, and how Alex is probably to blame.
Not that he had to go fuck his hand in the bathroom, imagining that it was yours instead.
Yeah. Evanâs really not sure how much more of this he can take.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
â Live Streamingâ Interactive Chatâ Private Showsâ HD Qualityâ Free Actions
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
summary: both you and evan have a raging oral fixation.
cw: smut, oral fixation, making out, 69.
ę§â đŠŕźşâ§ŕźťđŞ â ę§
evan had the biggest oral fixation known to mankind. he always had something in his mouth; a lollipop, his thumb, a straw.
no matter what, he always kept his mouth busy with random objects.
until he met you.
it didnât take long for you to notice his little fixation, and he was fucking excited when he found out you matched his fixation.
you two were always on each other. he particularly liked having you on his lap, straddling his hips while your tongue was shoved in his mouth. his arms were wrapped around your waist while he sucked on your tongue.
it just felt too good for him. it wasnât unusual for him to keep his hands behind your head just to keep you still while he sucked and slurped on your tongue.
he wasnât above bobbing his head back and forth while sucking on your tongue, almost as if he were sucking a cock, despite you not having one.
speaking of cocks and such. heâd let you use a strap on him. heâd be so eager to be on his knees and slurping on it, moaning and drooling.
another thing the two of you loved, was to 69. unsurprisingly, right? it was just the perfect position.
having a pretty thing sitting on his face, riding his tongue while also sucking him off? yeah, he was gone.
he just loved to use his tongue to fuck into you, hands on your ass as he pushed his tongue in ân out of you, moaning and drooling all over himself at both your taste and the feeling of your cunt squeezing around his tongue.
while riding him, you always shoved two fingers in his mouth to keep his mouth occupied. he let his tongue roam around your fingers, coaxing them with his spit before sucking them in his mouth.
although he always matched you. so, when it was his turn to be on top, he shoved his middle and ring fingers past your parted lips, telling you to âsuck and get âem all nice ân wet for me, baby.â
when he thought his fingers were wet enough, he moved them between you, and rubbed your clit with them to push you over the edge.
do not fret, after heâs done making you cum, heâll keep going and stick his wet fingers in his mouth.
youâre so considerate, making him finish like this.
If you had told yourself a few years ago that youâd be sitting in a beat-up truck with two kids in the backseat and another bun in the oven, you would have laughed right in your own face. You probably would've thrown in your usual sassy, âYeah, right. Iâm never having kids.â
But that was before you met Evan.
âAlright, you know the drill,â Evan said, shifting the truck into park as they arrived at their usual lakeside camping spot. He turned around in his seat, pointing a playful, warning finger at the back. âNo sâmores unless you actually help set up. Got it?â
He tried to sound tough, but everyone in that truck knew heâd inevitably give in to their puppy-dog eyes and feed them all the sugar they wanted. Those girls were his ultimate weakness.
Maggie, their oldest at ten, already had a bit of a "know-it-all" attitude, though she was still the biggest daddyâs girl on the planet. She crossed her arms, a cheeky little grin on her lips. âDad, I always help. It's Beth you have to worry about.â
âHey!â Your six-year-old Beth protested, kicking her legs. Beth was a chaotic force of nature, inheriting every bit of Evan's adventurous, reckless spirit. âIâm the bestest best helper!â
âOkay, okay..â Evan laughed, trying to keep the conversation from turning into a bickering match. He swung his door open and gave a quick âLetâs get to work!â to get the girlsâ attention.
As soon as the doors flew open, their routine commenced. Evan got straight to work, offloading the heavy grill, the foldable chairs and a few bags of supplies before he began pitching the tent all while Maggie and Beth dashed off toward the tree line, giggling as they began hunting for the perfect sticks for their bonfire later that night.
You claimed one of the foldable camping chairs, resting a hand over your growing baby bump. A gentle breeze carried the scent of pine cones and crisp lake water. Watching Evan wrestle with the tent poles while the girls argued over who found the bigger stick, you couldn't help but sigh in pure awe.
Evan caught you looking and paused, wiping a bead of sweat from his forehead. âYou doing okay over there, mama? Not too hot?â
âPerfect,â you smiled, leaning back. âJust enjoying the show. Youâre doing great, babe.â
âFlattery will get you everywhere.â he teased before hammering a tent stake into the ground.
-
By the time the sun began to dip below the tree line, painting the sky in deep shades of orange and purple, the campsite was fully transformed. The tent was pitched up with all four sleeping bags were unrolled inside, and Evan had successfully coaxed a brilliant, crackling fire to life in the stone pit. The air grew chilly, prompting everyone to bundle up in oversized hoodies and spare blankets.
Evan collapsed into the lawn chair next to you, letting out a long sigh as he stretched his legs toward the fire. âMan. I forgot how much I love it out here.â He grunted, earning a sound of agreement as you shifted closer, to which he immediately put a heavy arm around your shoulders, pulling you into his side. His thumb rubbed soothing circles against your arm while his other hand carefully rubbed your baby bump.
âLook, Dad! I got the perfect one!â Beth squealed, running up to the fire with a stick that was practically twice her size and so thin it looked more like a dry noodle with a pointy end. âWhoa, killer, careful,â Evan chuckled, catching the end of the stick before it poked him in the shin. âThatâs a serious weapon, sweetheart.â He snickered.
Maggie marched over, holding a perfectly straight stick with the right amount of thickness (to her standards at least) âit doesnât matter how long it is, Beth. They have to be strong enough to hold the mallow! Yours is gonna snap and drop your marshmallow in the dirt.â
âWill not!â
âWill too.â
âAlright, alright, break it up, girls,â you chimed in, laughing. âBring over the graham crackers and letâs test the theories, hm?.â
-
For the next hour, the campsite was filled with giggly, chaotic bliss of marshmallow roasting around their cozy bonfire. Beth, true to Maggie's prediction, immediately caught her marshmallow on fire, panicked, waved it around in hopes of putting it out, and dropped it into the ashes. She looked like she was about to burst into tears until Evan seamlessly swapped his perfectly golden-brown marshmallow onto her graham cracker.
âWeâll try another stick tomorrow, hm?â Evan smiled, bopping her nose. âThanks, Daddy,â Beth mumbled around a mouthful of chocolate and a few cheeky giggles.
-
As the night deepened, their sugar rush faded into cozy, quiet exhaustion. The stars crept out, reflecting perfectly on the still surface of the lake. Maggie was curled up on a blanket near Evanâs feet, leaning her head against his knee, while Beth had climbed into your lap, her heavy eyelids fluttering closed against your chest.
Evan looked down at Beth, then over to you, his eyes reflecting the warm glow of the dying embers. He reached out, gently placing his hand over yours, which was still resting on your belly.
âHey,â he said softly, his voice dropping to a tender murmur so he wouldn't wake the girls. âWhat are you thinking about?â
You looked at him, then down at the two beautiful, messy girls youâd made together, and finally at the little life kicking softly against your palm.
âJust thinking about having our other little angel here with us,â you whispered, a soft, smile playing at your lips as you gently rubbed up and down her bump. âWatching our last little angel grow up with the girls.â
Evanâs smile softened, his eyes full of a quiet, fierce affection. He leaned over, pressing a sweet, lingering kiss to your temple. âI mean..â he whispered back, giving a knowing look while wiggling his brows. âDoesnât have to be the last?â
âEvan.â
âAlright, alright! Just throwing it out there ya know..â
I'm gonna say it, I do think that even the laziest person imaginable should have a roof over their head, food in their stomach, and access to healthcare
you scoffed at dunk, your hushed whispers filling the outside air near the inn. between you lay a babe asleep against your chest, a sling keeping him right against you. for all it was worth, he was a deep sleeper.
âi told you nothing was going on,â you voiced, your frustration only building. around and around dunk had you going, making you feel like a fool the longer you fought. âwhy would iâ?â
âi donât know,â he cut you off, gaze hard and hands anchored at his hips. âbut i know what i saw.â
âwhat was it then, dunk?â you pressed on. âsing a ballad.â
dunk said nothing. he looked away, the worst of the storm in his mind rolling out in another wave. he was shaking, hands itching for you to hold. hands wanting to find that man and hold him high in the air, demanding that if he so much as looked your way, heâd find himself headfirst in the dirt.
for what? a laugh passed between two strangers? it made his stomach curlâwas he upset at you or himself? could he not handle such a sight?
another wave crashed into him, and you continued. âwith your babe at my chest? you think so lowly of me?â
âi never said iââ
âwell, seems weâre both making assumptions,â you bitterly laughed. âcanât even go around having a kind word with another. donât want to make the giant jealous.â
a quiet whine escaped the babe, making the both of you freeze. your hands rubbed at his back and patted his behind, easing him back into a bliss you only dreamed of. anything than fighting with dunk, anything than arguing over something so ridiculous.
ââŚiâll be in the room,â you scoffed, stepping away to pass him. dunk kept his head low, not trusting himself to follow. not yet, not when he felt so stupid.
when you came to the room, egg was already in bed. you tucked him properly, careful not to move so much out of risk of waking him. then came the babe, who didnât fuss or wake once he was moved to his basket.
the children were in bed, and you sat at the edge of the straw mattress. you didnât know how long you spent staring at the floorboards, the quiet rustle from underneath further trapping you in that moment of anger. all you could think was, how could he? how could he?
light broke into the room. dunk shuffled in, attempting to keep quiet for the sake of egg and your babe. you said nothing; you hadnât bothered to look at him.
a moment passed. maybe two, or three.
dunk spoke your name softly.
you settled in silence, refusing to look up, refusing to acknowledge he was there. it was easier to stir in your anger. your hands balled, then released, and balled again. you werenât entirely sure if you wanted to hit him or take it out on the bed.
âplease..â his voice carried to you again, and you realized he was moving closer. âiâm sorry. iâm sorry, my love.â
still, he was met with silence.
dunk sank to his knees in front of you. although heâd lowered himself, he was still too tall for you to meet him with your head hung. his hands hovered, not yet coming to the bend of your skirt, to your knees.
âiâm a fool,â he whispered. âstrip all i have, youâll find a big, stumbling foolââ
âdunk..â
he swallowed as your head lifted. âi know itâs not easy. but i love you, i do. it makes me do stupid things. iâm a stupid man, and i donât think when it comes to you, love. iâi just do. i actââ
âdunk,â you said again, voice nearly cracking. âyou need not to say such horrible things about it yourself.â
âi cannot explain my behavior otherwise.â
your hands came to his face, holding him there before he lay his head at your knees. his hands slipped up your skirt, the warmth of his skin touching your calves.
â..iâm a fool for you,â he continued. âiâd rather break a manâs teeth than watch one make you laugh, orâŚor make you smile.â
he felt your hands come to his head, burying into his roots. by the seven, it felt good. initially, he wanted to sink further. close enough to where he could drown in you and never have to see you with another again.
â..suppose it does make me jealous.â
âi didnât mean that.â
âyes, you did.â
âit was a poor choice of words.â
âno.â
âenough,â you sighed, lightly tugging on the strands. he picked himself up, not quite moving back but tilting his head to look up at you.
âyes,â you murmured. âit was. ought to have kinder.â
âiâmâŚiâm not entirely deserving of your kindness,â and by the look in his eyesâthose big, blue eyes, he believed it. ânot right now.â
âprotective.â you substituted anyway. âyouâre protective, and perhaps it fogs your mind.â
âdonât make excuses for me.â
âiâm not,â you huffed, taking his face into your hands again. âyou have a thick skull, we will agree on that.â
he said nothing for some time. your thumb stroked his cheek, and he watched as you softened at the mere sight of him. it made his gut twist and his heart stutter.
there was so much more he wanted to say. iâll be better. i love you. how is it you love me? i donât know if i deserve it. i love you.
yet when his lips parted, he whispered, â..iâm sorry.â
âi forgive you,â came half a second later.
dunk returned to your lap, his body pressing into your thighs as he held you close. for all the back-and-forth, neither of the children awoke.
despite the fabric against your skin, you felt the press of his lips on your stomach. one after another, as if he tried to bury his remorse into you.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
â Live Streamingâ Interactive Chatâ Private Showsâ HD Qualityâ Free Actions
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
stirring the pot "you really thought nobody would find out?" where dunk finds out his wife has been skipping meals bc they've been low on coins.
âby the seven, you barely gave yourself time to chew!â
egg looked up from his bowl, eyes wild and mouth stuffed when he met your gaze. he used his sleeve to wipe his mouth.
"i havenât eaten all day, my lady,â he said, and his eyes darted down to his bowl. âweâve been waiting for word from oldstones, and ser duncan said we must preserve coinâŚâ
âand you are still hungry?â the question tumbled out faster than you could consider. "i presume?"
egg was just as eager, âyes. although...i donât believe ser duncan would take kindly to his portion being taken. he's had some water, but he spit it out. it tasted as brown as it looked.â
it was as if the gods decided to strike you at that moment. egg sighed and set his bowl aside, eyes casted down to the grass. heâd never looked more diminutive.
âthe gods have favored you, then," you smiled, and without missing a beat, you picked up his bowl to bring it closer. you scraped what was left in your own, giving him your portion of supper. "i am quite full."
egg perked up, seeing how much you'd given--and there was not a scrap of meat left in your bowl.
"you...you hardly had any, my lady."
"i've had my share of sweet rolls all day. there was a caravan not far from here...offered me a few in exchange for thread."
the boy's nose wrinkled, sniffing out the lie quicker than a man could twice his age. but the look on your face washed him in doubt. you had traded your goods for something sweet, yet you had nothing left? not even for your husband-knight?
"sweet rolls are very fulfilling," he said with caution. yet the moment you handed over his bowl, he couldn't help himself. he refused to listen to you and ate like a wolf pup starved of fresh meat.
as the days wore on, it became your new normal. there was little to share between the three of you, and dunk was so caught up in duty that he ate his suppers much later than you and the boy. you kept his meals hot, and he nearly drooled over the fire every night.
by the end of the moon cycle, he found himself on an early return.
"slow down, lad," he came over to you, his gaze lingering on egg as the boy took a big bite of bread. he practically had a full meal to work on, and dunk immediately took notice of your own state. there was not a cut of beef nor a cup of broth anywhere on your plateâand your plate was nowhere in sight, he realized.
"did you eat?" he asked, his face morphing into concern.
you readied his plate with a nod, "some time ago. i found some berries nearby. they were perfectly ripe."
as you handed over his plate, he took the first bite with a slowness you'd never seen before. he chewed, uncharacteristically unhurried. "you ought to have more than berries."
"they were very filling. i almost gave myself an ache."
"...what sort of berries?"
ah, fuck.
"i don't know," you paused. "they were red. reminded me of apples, but...not as big."
"she said she'd pick some for the morrow!" egg chirped, his cheeks full. "you still will, won't you, my lady?"
"yes," you smiled, but it was strained. you looked to dunk, who had not once looked away from you. "perhaps if you bought honey, it'll make for a good treat."
dunk watched you for a moment longer. "i might, aye."
and he left it at that.
until the next evening, when there were no berries in your shared bags. a deer must have plucked the rest, you excused.
dunk knew he was a great fool. egg ran circles around him, ever the clever lad, and you were always gentle in your approach. every passing day you lived was for one another, to guide each other through the hardships of the road. some nights you found yourself in an inn, sharing a warm bed and fevered kisses. others, you were in a ditch, wrapped in a rough spun cloak and shielding the boy from the wind.
it was never easy, and your life was without stability. but you had your constant, and that was your hedge knight.
so why did you no longer trust him?
another evening, and another sparse meal was split between the three of you. dunk stared you down like a predator, listening to every scrape of your spoon as you gave egg the last bits of supper. you looked tired, more so than he'd ever seen.
he was quiet while his squire was around. dunk kept to himself, stirring in thought, while you cleaned the pan and tended to the fire. it felt like ages before egg finished and retreated to his bedroll. still, he waited until he heard egg's soft snores.
"...what is it you've had today?" he asked, tense even when you came to sit beside him. it was difficult not to touch you, to not wrap an arm around you and huddle you close. his anger wouldn't dissolve, but it would soften.
dunk could not afford to soften over you, not over this.
"suppose some trout flew from the river and offered itself?"
"don't play the fool, my love. there were some leftover bread and honey...it made for a good meal." there was no hostility in your voice. no objection. dunk stiffened under your touch, his arm turning to near stone when your head came to rest.
"then why treat me as one?" he kept his voice low; his indignation was unkempt.
your tranquility ended there. you sat up in a heartbeat, head turning to look him in the eye. he felt just as you lookedâconfused and offended. the question between you was shared, and neither knew how to answer.
"i have done no such thing, duncan."
"you have," he swore, his brows furrowing as he turned fully towards you. "you believe i would not find out?"
"what are youâ?"
"you lied. you so easily wove comfort into egg and i, making us think you've taken care of yourself with senseless fibsââ
"fibs?" you choked back a laugh.
"are you amused?" he hissed, before his voice broke. "does wasting away bring you comfort? are youâthis eager to leave me behind?"
you snapped out of it. he'd never spoken to you that way, and a spike of aggravation struck. "i...i did what was necessary."
"by becoming skin and bone."
"by not letting you and the boy starve. i do indulge, duncan, if it concerns you so," your gaze hardened, your voice quieted to a whisper. "and i am not the only one with secrets."
"i have hidden nothing from you!"
"you have," you shot back, "for a time."
dunk shook his head as he gathered what was left of supper onto his plate. he refused to look at you now, even after he pushed the plate over to you.
"i am fine." you trembled. "i told you, i ate long beforeââ
"you need it more than me. eat, before i feed you myself."
you swallowed your argument, choosing not to test his patience any longer. not with words, at least.
"i have no issue throwing you over my knee," he warned.
oh, how you wished you could snap back. your fingers curled, hands tightening into fists. he glanced down, almost snorting at the sight. you were the first to move, but not to strike him.
you took his plate, your stomach twisting at the aroma. dunk pushed himself over, coming closer as you began to eat what was left. he reached for you, pushing your hair back as the wind blew.
"aye," he murmured, voice softer than before. it was a start. "that's my girl."
cass try not to write over 1.3k challenge impossibleâŚwho am i if i donât challenge my own rules
Ö´ÖśÖ¸đŞ˝ŕźŕź body worship, messy make out, praising, vulnerability
post-sex glow
glowing. sensitive. shaking. nothing gets shane harder than seeing you like this. not just fucked. completely satisfied. skin flushed. eyes soft and hazy. lips plump and red from his biting and rough kisses. cum and saliva still on your thighs. youâre blooming. youâre beautiful. things that make him want to stare at you. or fuck you again. this time, heâs itching to do both.
youâre breathing heavily beside him. messy hair. tears dried on your cheeks. your body heavy and boneless. every nerve ending is open and sensitive. shane lays beside you, breathing the same. he looks at you before pulling you to his chest, pressing tiny kisses on your head. he buries his nose in your hair, breathing in the sweat mixing with whatever products you used. he wipes the sweat across your forehead, looking at your half-lidded eyes. the bastard smirks. âyou okay, baby?â so proud of himself every time he makes you end up like this. all pretty and tired.
âhmmmâŚâ you just hum tiredly.
his lips trail to your jaw, kissing down your neck. smelling you. the way the sweat, the smell of sex, and his own scent cling to your skin takes all his patience not to fuck you again. he drags his tongue out and sucks a long, hard line into your neck. âtaste so good, sweetheartâŚâ he whispers against your skin before giving you a bruising suck.
he canât stop touching you. squeezing your thighs. playing with your nipples. sliding his fingers through the cum on your skin. he loves every bit of reaction because your body is just all sensitive and fucked. his hips keep rocking, a slow, desperate grind against your thigh. heâs hard and aching and deliberately holding back.
âshane⌠letâs get cleaned upâŚâ a light giggle slips out from your lips because of how he canât seem to keep himself off you.
he sighs deeply before sitting up. stops. his breathing halts as he looks over your body. youâre laying on the bed, spent, legs shaking slightly. marks and bruises all over you. from him.
you notice him staring so you kick his foot. he catches your leg and massages it gently in your thighs. his fingers work the sore muscle, then trail up through the slick youâre still leaking. âshaneeeâ you whine. your voice comes out low and broken. raspy from how he made you scream. he loves that sound. loves the way it rumbles in your chest because of him.
shane scoffs and leans in. he just hovers above you, drinking in the sight. your flushed skin. that fucked-out glaze in your eyes. the way youâre barely holding onto consciousness.
âwhat a pretty girl you are,â he murmurs under his breath. he watches your lips part, watches your chest rise and fall. then his mouth is on yours. immediately messy. aggressively kissing you, fucking your mouth with his tongue. he only stops when you tap his arm and pinch him.
he pulls away, breathing heavy. looks at you again. at the spit-slick mess heâs made of your lips. âthink you can take another round?â as his hand slides down your thighs again.