But then Mike comes for a visit and he and Eddie are trying to figure out what to do for dinner. Richie’s at a meeting so Eddie calls him – Mike sees that Richie’s listed under DICKHEAD in Eddie’s phone – and when Richie picks up the phone, Mike can hear him on the other line saying, “Hi, baby. What’s up?”

“Mike wants food. Real food, not pizza,” Eddie says, and gives Mike a half-apologetic look for throwing him under the bus, because Mike would be happy with pizza.

“Pizza is real food, but fine, pick a place and I’ll meet you there,” Richie says.

“No, come home first and we’ll go out together,” Eddie says.

“You miss me, huh?” Richie says.

“No,” Eddie says, totally deadpan, but Mike knows that smile – he always smiled like that when Richie wasn’t looking. “I just know that if I don’t keep you on track, we’ll end up getting pizza anyway because nothing will be open by the time you show up.”

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll come home first and kiss you, you fucking liar,” Richie says. “See you in a bit. Love you.”

“Love you,” Eddie says, and turns back to Mike. “All right, asshole’s on board.”

Mike tries to pretend like he isn’t weirdly shaken by the entire thing, but as soon as Eddie isn’t looking at him, he goes to the Ben-Bev-Bill-Stan-Mike group text and writes We were wrong. R&E are VERY different.

Bill replies ???????

Mike writes They say ilu when they hang up the phone, and Bill sends a heart emoji and then You sure it’s ilu and not fuck u? 

R called E baby and E didn’t kill him, he writes back, and his phone shows that Bill is typing for a full minute before he replies with No fucking way.

“It’s Neil Patrick Harris,” Eddie snaps. “Who the fuck thinks it’s Donnie Osmond?”

“I do, because it’s fucking obvious,” Richie says, throwing his hand toward the screen. Eddie grabs his wrist and brings his hand back down, sliding their fingers together. It’s an absent gesture, unselfconscious in a way that says Eddie does it a lot, taking casual possession of Richie’s space and attention and body. Stan remembers Eddie as a pretty affectionate kid, although now that he thinks about it, it was usually with Richie and came with a generous helping of slapping and insults.

He hastily takes a picture that’s a little blurry but representative nonetheless, and sends it to the group chat. Guys, he writes, I think they like each other. 

Bullshit, Bev replies. 

Witchcraft and sorcery, Ben adds.

He gets really quiet toward the end of the meal, but after they’ve paid and they’re walking out of the restaurant, he says, “I wanna walk to the hotel. It’s nice out. It’s so nice.”

“Oh god,” Bev whispers.

“What?” Bill asks way too loudly, because he’s not exactly great at holding his liquor either.

“Eddie’s drunk,” Ben says, walking three across with Bill and Bev on the sidewalk. 

“You’ll see,” Bev says. 

honestly they are the reason i’m still here and alive right now🥺