amorphous & nebulous

I cannot even begin to explain how it feels to have someone say "I completely understand why your knee is chronically annoyed." I have had SO many practitioners, doctors and otherwise, look at my knee, my hip, my IT band, my movement, and tell me they don't understand why I have pain. There are no structural issues! You move well! You're strong! There are some obvious points of weakness but we can work on those! All for minimal or temporary relief. I truly feel like this trainer got it from the very beginning. And it's nothing crazy it's just a different approach and I'm fully following along too. All the adjustments she makes I'm like YEP I can see that. It's just nuts. So frustrating to think of all the time and money and pain I've spent on everything else (not that this is truly a singular solution, only time will tell) but also so incredibly validating and relieving to finally find someone who fully understands the entire picture.

Utterly heinous sleep last night after a stressful end to the work day - was just doing so much all at once and then saw a message from a client saying they're giving their 30 days notice and it tipped me over the edge. I'm honestly not that concerned about it, I haven't made substantial money from them in a while, but it was more like a triggered response. My work has been so overwhelming for like two months now and I'm really feeling burnt out. I already didn't like my work and it's been such chaos lately, and it's seeping into my life in a way I actively try to prevent. I really do think it will get better after Italy because the big event starts just before I come back and hopefully people will act less insane once that's done. And this reignites my fire to find euro clients and launch my fucking website!! Which is done! HAS been done! Simply gathering dust!!! So it's all good. Just a lot in the mere hours before my parents arrive. But I will let the excitement of their arrival carry me through the day!!!!

Silly little brain being so stressed about work with my parents arriving Wednesday and taking off all next week to go to Italy - get to climbing gym and instantly chill out - go figure!!!