i hope something lesbian happens to all my mutuals soon. if you’re a straight woman or a gay man i hope something lesbian happens to you as well but in a different way

Having someone ask ChatGPT in a meeting is like being a grown-ass professional adult in a room full of other grown-ass professional adults trying to solve a problem, while a colleague with one of those baby toys that makes animal sounds repeatedly presses the cow button. And we all have to stop what we're doing and listen to cow go moo and say "wow hm yeah that's not really what we're asking but the cow does definitely go moo, good thoughts"

Except increasingly the cow is being treated as a respected contributor to meetings as we pivot to a moo-centric business model that principally produces bullshit

my nickname "guy who doesn't attack people" is raising a lot of questions that are already answered by the nickname

monks debating whether vows of silence should still allow you to leave emoji reacts on the monastery groupchat

tbh i think no matter how much people try to optimize intentionally-produced stim toys nothing will ever top Some Piece Of Crap You Found At A Yard Sale 15 Years Ago or perhaps Garbage

i have good taste except when i don’t but when i don’t it’s in a sexy way

Don’t make your younger self into your own dead wife.

Don’t make your older self into a husband you resent. Idk

did mitski ever find out what to do after you've been big and small and big and small again and still nobody wants you

Just came home from a dinner party with the friendgroup at which several people kept saying "Ask Pedro" or "Pedro will know" and I was terrified that they were referring to an AI like Claude but no, thank fuck, they were referring to a cardboard cutout of Pedro Pascal that someone left upstairs and who has been designated a kind of patron saint status in the household.

sometimes i see an opinion i disagree with, and from a combination of wanting to keep up appearances, avoid flak, and cut to the heart of the issue, i draft a series of increasingly abstract responses, eventually culminating in typing out "falsehoods aren't true", which, in a perfect act of autofellatio, deletes itself