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Mexican artist Gabriel Dawe creates a rainbow sculpture woven from over sixty miles of colored thread.

Updated Sex Toy Buying Guides!

This weekend I’ve been updating links in posts which lead me to updating some guides, again, and then naturally I had to tell you about it. Goddamnit, I did a lot of work, somebody give me a cookie.

35+ Body-Safe Sex Toys Under $35 - Swapped out some recommendations with new stuff like this $10 vibrator that I’m actually reviewing soon, NoFrillDos, created 4 “kits” for sex toy newbs to try a few things for ~ $50 plus shipping, added a couple non-sex-toy items, and more.  I found that there are almost 70 silicone dildos at SheVibe priced $35.99 or less, and yes they are actually silicone.

How to Choose Your First Dildo - Not too many updates here, but a new picture and refreshed links and info. Picks for affordable dildos ranging from petite to moderate with information on how to figure out the best size for you. This guide is best for folks who’ve never purchased a dildo and/or are new to penetration in general. 

A Guide to Choose Your First Sex Toy - This one’s for the folks who don’t even really know where to start, they just know they want to incorporate some sex toys into their life. I’ve tried to keep the recommendations lower-priced but capped it at $80 because, as I found in the under-$35 guide, it’s goddamn hard to find vibrators I like for less than $50. Not impossible, but difficult.

The “Does Anybody Need This Many Suction Cup Dildos” Guide - I’ve found all the suction cup sex toys at the major retailers I work with. This guide excludes the fantasy dildos from indy makers simply because I don’t own any and don’t know enough about those little brands.

You have adopted a title that should come with a giant heaping dose of honor, respect, and trustworthiness. 

1. Don’t make demands of submissive girls that don’t belong to you. You should know the difference between having the ability to control your own submissive, and how you should be treating all the rest that don’t belong to you.

2. Don’t talk intimately/woo other submissives behind the back of the one that belongs to you. All the time and energy you have to put into the submissive world should be aimed at your own submissive. If you want a different submissive, do the right thing, and break with the one you currently own first.

3. Don’t ditch submissives. How would you feel if the person you depend on for nearly everything suddenly went up in a puff of smoke, and was never heard from again? How would it effect your ability to trust someone else to take up the same role in your life? Stop ghosting, and ruining perfectly good submissives. 

4. Don’t cut your submissive out from contributing to your relationship. Yes, I know she put you in charge, but relationships evolve, and if you don’t attend to what she wants out of yours, your relationship is likely to evolve in separate directions. You can still be in charge, and listen to her wants and needs, I promise. 

5. Don’t ask someone you just met to be your submissive. It’s your job to inspire her to submit to you, by getting to know who she is, and showing her that you are the single most qualified man to be her Dominant. Don’t be lazy. Being a Dominant takes a lot of focus and energy. If you’re not up for that, go find another title to adopt. 

6. Don’t put your submissive on a shelf when caring for her is not convenient to you, and take her down off the shelf when it suits you. Submissives are human beings, and though some of them like to be treated like objects from time to time, they should not be ignored when you don’t feel like dealing with your relationship. If you don’t have to the time and energy to adopt the role of Dominant for someone, then don’t do it in a half-assed way.

7. Don’t compare your current submissive with past submissives. It’s not a competition. You should be making her feel like she’s the most important person in your current world, so don’t make her feel like she’s less than other submissives, or that you’re pining for something you no longer have, and feel you can’t have with her. 

8. Don’t skimp on the essential ingredients in D/s relationships. Don’t be that guy who limits your submissives safeword in any way. A safeword is the difference between consensual sex, and possible rape and abuse. Don’t skimp on aftercare. Let her know how much you appreciate all the control she continuously allows you to have over her, and how well she is performing for you. It’s the difference between a proud and happy submissive, and a sad and confused one. 

9. Don’t make unilateral decisions that your submissive is directly opposed to. You don’t get to decide your submissive needs a sister because it suits you to have a second submissive to play with, when it’s patently against her wishes. Once again, it’s her relationship too. 

10. Don’t lie to your submissive. It’s all about trust. It’s trust that inspires her to submit to you. It’s trust that inspires her to allow you to continue to hold her submission. One or two breaches of trust, and it all falls apart. 

I have suffered almost all of these issues at one time or another (all but 7 and the safeword part of 8). (1) happens to me almost daily.