just another marmot monday

i know every digit of pi

i dont know what order

Honestly this is fucking brilliant because you can put hot drinks in this cup and since it has a handle you won’t burn your hand drinking it

the catboys i signed for my all-catboy baseball team dont know what baseball is and theyre actively loudly sobbing whenever they miss a swing and whenever they dive to catch a ball it bonks them on the head and they go "uweh" and our pitcher closes his eyes whenever he throws because hes scared and we're beating every other team in the league

(joker voice) grapes... (rotates grape between my fingers) are a kind of food... (flicks grape in the air and into my mouth) that can make a man craaaazy! (joker laugh)

And they say brunettes with dimples can’t stabilize the reactor core 😏

Uh Oh

I got a bad feeling about this

You and me both Rainbow Dash

Breeding kink so disabling I pop a semi every time I put fuel in my car

I really typed this in my car at the petrol station because I was worried that if I waited until I got home I’d forget it

wish you’d have waited OP

I think the problem with Kermit is that it's really easy to reduce him to a joyless jerk because his role IS being the straight man to a cast of bozos and he IS blunt and tired, but the thing is, he's not a jerk hes a funny little frog.

Kermit is not a jerk, Kermit represents the exact feeling you get when one of your posts reaches over 100k notes and people keep adding the same bad joke on the comments