Things That Amuse Me

you guys only like me because the mold is infectious

I'm apparently so consistently aroace that a friend of mine uses me as a measurement for whether or not something counts as "romantic," based on when I stop understanding what he's talking about.

locusts are SO fucked up. imagine if your apartment complex got too crowded during a drought so everyone in it started overproducing serotonin until they gained 100lb of pure muscle and then chewed through the drywall of every building in the neighborhood

they do this over in philly

hello male writer. before you is a typewriter. you have one day to write a novella with a woman as the protagonist without describing her breasts. the timer begins now

Her ass was like a peach, and brother I’m in her pit.

well. that one’s on me

one of the most annoying ripple effects of fandom culture is the way so many people can’t seem to keep it in perspective that at the end of the day they’re just talking about art. it feels like i am trapped between people who are like “if you dare criticize the thing i like you are basically personally coming into my house and stealing my dog and shooting my jewelry” and people who are like “global communism is being stopped from succeeding because steven universe is on the air.” and call me a centrist but i don’t think either of those things are true

in fact, steven universe has been off the air for some time now. that’s why i’m confused

Honestly one of my favourite pieces of Kris fanart