electric stoves aren’t real btw they’re placebo stoves. your food cooks because of the placebo effect

yeah no its just a bunch of LEDs that turn red, it only boils water because you expect the water to boil

its always “lets remove the incinerator at the bottom to save the plinko horse” and not “lets not put a horse in a fucking plinko machine” 🙄

the horse always gets in there anyway

It’s always “why did you get in the river” and “your soaking wet” and never How was the river The river looked fun was it fun

it rly is fucked up how you literally don’t ask to be born and then you’re supposed to come out to your dad

they didn't even ban mpreg

so why is apple only applying this standard to tumblr and not, say, twitter, where you can find porn in under 5 minutes without even looking for it via its ios app?