I got treated like shit while my heart was pure, I'll never forget that.

I'm suffering in silence BTW just so you know I'm suffering but silently and without letting anyone know just in case you hadn't heard

sorry for that emotional response that wasn’t very heavily medicated and in therapy of me

all the people ive drifted from are like open wounds on my heart

“nobody understands me” but not in the “edgy suffering from teenager syndrome mad at mom” kind of way, but the “lonely isolating young adult realization that the specific combination of mental illnesses and past experiences i’ve had have resulted in a pattern of behaviors that are often misinterpreted and misconstrued by others” type of way

I really feel like im losing. Like I feel so controlled by my trauma, anxiety, depression, disorders and it's overpowering me. It controls my life. Everything in my life. I feel so paralyzed and so fucked up. Why can't I just be normal. How does everyone else make it look so easy. I'm tired, exhausted, really.

i am addicted addicted addicted addicted to anything that distracts me. i cannot deal with my own thoughts, memories, emotions. i dont want to think about myself or my life or anything at all related to me.