sawed-off genius

ahhhhhhhh ……. so peasful (explosions) (cartoonish screaming) aaaahhh … 

hate paper straws ooh it’s biodegradable yeah i know because it’s biodefuckingrading in my coffee asshole

We need meat straws

they posted this and then deleted…

100k slowburn but it’s just two people going from work friends to real friends

btw vampires represent queerness . and they also represent the urge to just bite people

Misingno

clone trooper that paints his leg armor to look like pants

thank you for drawing the best thing ive ever seen

One time my card declined at a subway and I literally watched them eat my sandwich in front of me.

Im not sure why you guys think this is a bad thing. This is justice in its purest form.

Not to get serious about a meme, but Morbius should have been a comedy. The idea of vampirism being the only way to cure a chronic illness is extremely funny. Imagine being in a support group with this goth guy and one day he's like "Ummm... hi guys... I'm not going to be coming to meetings anymore :/" and you're like "Aww, why not, Morbius?" and he. Sorry I can't finish this I wrote the word Morbius one too many times and started laughing too hard to continue

Must suck ass to be like. a lawyer or something in the pokemon world. They haven't made any cool lawyer pokemon yet

Ho oh

I think we have different definitions of ‘lawyer’ but sure

Why wouldn't ho oh be a lawyer? They're a Phoenix, wright?

In the kindest way possible, fuck you