:P

The media room chuckles as expected and then the video ends. You drag the video's seek-bar to replay the last thing Quinn said. Your frown grows deeper as his last answer reverberates in your mind.

You started spending your summers in Michigan after you were traded. By the time that first summer post-trade rolled around, there was no mistaking the hook Quinn snuck into you, reeling you in with patient precision. However, you and Quinn weren't sleeping together just yet at that point in time.

You wouldn't put it past Quinn to lie. No one in that room can fact check him nor have any of the internet sleuths been able to pinpoint the exact timeline of your relationship. But his expression was strangely honest as he responded, lashes fluttering as he looked down with a private smile vaguely curling the corners of his mouth.

This post-game interview sits with you for a handful of days. Quinn's out on a roadie and your throat clams up when you consider asking him during one of your calls what he meant.

Maybe it's for the best, you rationalize. Blunt conversations with Quinn tend to lead to outcomes you'd rather avoid.

You look at the ring on your hand, an idea taking shape in the back of your mind.

There's more than one way to skin a cat after all.

-

He's dragging his razor down his throat when you wrap your arms loosely around his hips. His skin is damp against your cheek, radiating heat from the hot shower he's taken.

"Hey, baby," you say, voice betraying nothing. "Can I ask you something?"

He rinses off his razor and tosses it into a cup. Then, he twists in your arms so he can shift your position. His arms go around you as he braces himself against the counter. It can't be comfortable for him but you don't really care.

"Yeah, anything," he says, bemused.

You take a steadying breath. Just rip the bandaid off. Easy peasy.

"When did you know that you liked me?" you ask slowly.

He gives you a curious look. "Liked you?"

"Well, it's not like you fell in love with me at first sight," you say. You level him with a withering glare when he purses his lips contemplatively. "I'm serious, Quinny."

"What's brought this on?" he asks instead, smoothing his thumb over your eyebrow.

"I was writing my vows and I realized I don't know when you actually started liking me..." you trail off.

The lie doesn't bother you but it does remind you that you should probably get started on your vows. Everyone's expecting something especially sappy from you and you aim to please.

You can tell the moment his breathing goes from automatic to manual. His arms tighten around you and you feel how his heart has started to pound against your cheek.

"Decker's birthday," he says, voice roughened. "At that golf course where you nearly took Jack's head off with your swing."

You balance your chin on him so you can look up. His lip is tucked under his teeth and his eyes faraway.

The memory takes some time to come forth. Decker was turning twenty two and he'd invited everyone on the team as well as some of his other friends from the NTDP. With how small the NHL world is, it wasn't a surprise to find the older two Hughes brothers in attendance. You had too many mutual friends with them to not be acquaintances at the very least but Decker's birthday was the first time you exchanged more than a few polite words with them. It was also the last time you let yourself be in their presence without a buffer until you were traded to Quinn's team.

His twenty second birthday was years ago though.

"I didn't see you that much after that but I thought about you constantly."

There's an accusation in there somewhere but you don't have the mental bandwidth to find it.

You swallow harshly. The lump in your throat restricts your voice and you croak out, "That was...some time ago."

"When you got traded to the Wild, it felt like fate,'" he shrugs.

A chill has begun to spread from your chest and down to your fingertips. It shouldn't matter. Just because he liked you then doesn't mean this was years in the making.

The ring on your finger, your shortened career, your legacy that is more Quinn's than it is yours, they're all byproducts. Quinn is many things but there is no part of you that believes he planned that far ahead. It's unfathomable.

It would mean you were trapped from the beginning.

Blood splatters in your mouth as you bite down on your cheek, ripping the soft skin under your molars.

It doesn't matter.

It can't matter.

It won't matter.

+ I almost had him say, “Do you understand me?” but I’m glad we both agree that’s the thing he wouldn’t say out loud. He doesn’t need to. You know him. You know what he means

+ Jack definitely has your chin between his forefinger and thumb and steadies you so you’re looking directly at him. He brings his other hand up, patiently dabbing at the tears uselessly dripping down your cheeks until you calm down to his liking. The look on his face is so unfamiliar. This isn’t the Jack you know. This isn’t a Jack you know

(Once you agree verbally, he stretches out his sleeve until it covers his hand and tells you to blow your nose.)

+ OR3 is the worst thing to happen to you because the amount of edits you see of you and Quinn to stupid song and honeybee and u + me = <3 is diabolical. 'I know everybody changes, but I hope that we don't' follows the two of you around like a chain around your neck. There's a particular moment that damns you where you're looking so fondly at Quinn because he's just won you guys the game in OT and while lip readers haven't quite figured out what you're saying in that brief clip, it's obvious how happy Quinn is to hear it. And that moment gets edited to 'a face I swear that I could spend my whole life knowing'. It makes you sick to your stomach. You also never finish listening to OR3.

+ He hatesss when he's reminded you had other d-partners than him (ones you actually liked LKADSFALD) and there are sooo many edits of you on your old team looking sm happier

+ bfb!reader knows she wouldn't be supported in the slightest if she were to try divorcing Quinn. It's implied but she's extremely close to her family so there is no universe where she is willing to give them up to get rid of Quinn. Besides, let's say a divorce did happen through some miracle (the miracle? Quinn wanting to prove to her that no matter what she does to get rid of him, he will always be around) Her family would still be inviting Quinn around as they always have so it's a null point

+ dman!reader knows what the public perception will be if she divorces Quinn. And in this situation, Quinn would make sure it is as nasty of a process as possible if she were to try. It's such an out of reach thing that she doesn't feel bad when she threatens to divorce him over mild inconveniences. (She doesn't dare to do it when they do have major arguments. It would be that touch too far that would send Quinn into lockdown mode.) Unfortunately, like you said, it becomes more trouble than its worth early on and she stops using it as the butt of a joke (She does wistfully read about other women who have left their controlling partners sometimes)

+ I'm sorry Jack in every universe I've ever written is not the one to be bringing up a divorce to. He'd let you finish your sentence and then tell you no. And that's the end of the conversation

+ devsmin!au goes exactly as you said. He goes from comforting to cold in a matter of seconds. You blink and he's an entirely different person. The air feels so still as he looks at you, you can hardly suck in a ragged breath. He'd make sure you've wiped the tears from your eyes and that your sniffling is kept to a minimum before he says softly, "Do not ever say that again. We are never divorcing."

+ The situation in forward!au is killing me. You know divorce is not in your cards. Jack's proven to you what he's willing to do to keep you so why make yourself miserable hoping for something that will never come? So you are genuinely just relaying your friend's situation to Jack because you know, he's your partner and it's a normal thing to bring up 😭 I'm ctfu at him saying I would never divorce you in response to you asking him if he'd stay with you if you were to do terrible, awful things to him. You're genuinely like ??? You would stay? And he keeps doubling down like oh my god. You're talking about a hypothetical situation where you've ruined him mentally and put him through shit no one should ever be put through, especially by someone that claims to love them and he's too focused on you using the word divorce devoid of the context. Jesus. Can someone bring you a drink?

+ You having to follow up and say well I'm not talking about us LASDKFASDALDSJFK and him being petulant about it I'm cryinggg what the fuck is his problem <- we all know what it is 😭

+ No one would believe you didn't want it. In fact, most people will believe you pursued him and/or wore him down to get into this relationship. And with how you were with one of his teammates before (it being a casual relationship does nottt matter), it looks pretty bad. You can't deny that and trying to defend yourself will make the situation look worse

+ Every day they get closer and closer to Quinn hooking an arm around you and dragging you to be half in his lap during movie nights. He's so thankful when the bars are packed and he can bracket you with his arms in the name of 'protection' or whatever excuse he comes up with on the spot

+ You do nottt want to admit to Quinn that the reason you're asking that is because of him. He will take that inch and stretch into a mile

+ He's soooo happy to find out he was the threat and not Jack. It's happened before where some guy you were seeing couldn't tolerate the friendship you have with Jack (rightfully so). But for it to be Quinn this time around? He's not going to let this opportunity slide

+ 'It's the I don't know...that's scary... meme' ALSKDFASD but literally. You're what? 21-22 years into this sort of friendship (I imagine you met in pre-k or something) and the one time you could've done a reset, Jack's brother joined you in Minny shortly after so you don't really get a break. Because those brothers are codependent on each other as well so you're all fueling each other's bad habits lmfao it would be very scary to try and navigate something new with Jack

+ DO NOT SEPARATE!!!! If you and Jack were shelter animals, the shelter wouldn't even be able to move you guys into separate kennels without one of you legitimately suffering a health crisis from being apart #attached also thank you!! I'm so glad I got across how deeply bonded they are 😭 I worried that it came off romantic but isn't all deep love vaguely romantic in certain angles...

+ Exactlyyy Quinn is just feeding into your delusions. He thinks you guys are weird but he won't commit to saying that because if you keep doing what you're doing, he benefits from it. And ultimately, he is okay with whatever you have going on with Jack. He might be the only person in the world who would allow you guys to remain as you are. He loves Jack. And that's all that really matters

+ He also bought that cologne so you'd associate it with him and your time with him #yay

+ Quinn trying to say as bluntly as possible without telling you flat out that he wants you LDJLASD he's like it's okay you can be a freaky bonded pair with my brother I love you guys enough to deal with that shit

+ We are always playing with dolls here and I'm making ours kiss 😚 And I agree! I really enjoy the duality of having a friend that's your platonic soulmate (one where it's a healthy relationship vs one where it's crept into unhealthy territory) and their brother who is obsessed with you (one where he's outwardly pretty odd about you and one where he is a little weird but harmless in your eyes for the most part bc you simply see him as an extension of his brother)

+ 'like putting up with all this nonsense for the brother that DOESN'T want you #LikeThat is soooo tragic' and it's suchhh a complicated thing because you love Jack/Quinn sooo much, truly from the very bottom of your heart, but you can't have them without having their brother along for the ride so you'll swallow whatever discomfort their brothers bring you for the sake of your friendship #TrueLove and all that

+ devsmin!reader and Quinn have a mostly normal friendship. They’re not codependent in the way bff!reader and Jack are. And the difference is that Quinn loves Jack more than he’s ever loved Reader. He’s willing to ruin Reader’s life for Jack’s happiness. 

+ I love how you bring up Quinn's enabling of Jack's behavior. On the surface, the things Reader sees (letting Jack buy her tickets to the Olympics, going along with the gf thing, sending Jack to comfort you etc) are things she can talk herself into thinking as Quinn being oblivious because of his rose-colored glasses when it comes to Jack. She trusts Quinn so much (as seen by her asking Quinn to 'take' her virginity. She wanted someone that loved and cared for her as much as she loved and cared for them to have her first time with and of course Quinn fits that bill perfectly) it wouldn't cross her mind ever that he had a hand in pushing her into Jack's arms

+ bff!reader and Jack are crazily codependent. There’s a theory that for the first five months (at least the first few months), babies think they’re an extension of their mom. And that’s the best way to put how their friendship operates. They have known each other for SO long and have seen each other through everything. But what made their codependency what it is are those years in NY/NJ together especially Jack's rookie year. She was his rock that year and they practically melded together. And they don't see a problem with it either!

+ The characterization I derive for Jack is one where he’s used to the being the favorite. It makes him self-centered for a lack of a better word. So it’s a chip on his shoulder in the devsmin!au that she’s Quinn’s first in a way. She may never see Quinn romantically but Jack will always have some sort of hang-up about the dynamic she has with Quinn. Part of him is also like well why wouldn’t she be in love with Quinn after all these years? Quinn’s the greatest guy around. So there’s also this weird little brotherism there too playing into it lol 

+ In bff!au, this manifests in him feeling off kilter that his favorite people may get together and where does that leave him? He’s never had to share either of them in this way. But at the same time, it’s his favorite people getting together and he knows Quinn will be a great partner and vice versa so his hackles aren’t raised nearly as much about the situation

+ Obsessed with your entire breakdown of bff!reader and Jack's relationship and particularly this part -> (jack 1000% still threw a fit when you got your first boyfriend and/or lost your virginity. before he was like. wait why tf do i care. we're not examining that (you both figured out it was attention-based. like he just wants your attention and doesn't want to lose it to someone else, sorryyyyy for being acclimated to a certain way of life. as if its my fault)) because that's the crux of it right? It's not that Jack wants to be your boyfriend or the person you lose your virginity to (he would do the latter if you asked ofc) but it bothers him that you're sharing experiences with people that aren't him. You were his first you know? You always have been. You always will be. It's how your friendship has functioned since its inception and it's hard to deal with things that challenge that basis. And just like you said, you guys don't need the outside validation but Quinn coming in adds a stressor where you start to wonder if there is something off about you and Jack despite how it seems to work for you guys

+ And absolutely you're doubling down after that talk with Quinn in the drabble. I was hoping to portray your messy inner reflections and how you won't let yourself form a complete thought on the situation because it would force you to confront things you aren't ready to accept. This then leads to your conclusion that you need to seek out people that understand this is how Jack and you are vs changing what you and Jack are #yourworldview

+ ("would you fuck me, if you had the chance?" asked over one of those stupid card games meant for a bunch of 20 somethings to play over beers. you roll your eyes that you picked that basic ass card. jack would make some joke if he were here, make a face, but quinn gets this heavy hooded look in his eyes and absolutely brings it up again when the two of you are alone. red alert girl! THIS CANNOT BE YOUR JACK 2!) <- loveeeeee this so much. You're so used to treating Quinn as Jack, you expect him to react as Jack would (a scoff or sarcastic obviouslyyy) so when you don't hear anything, you look up and are met with a look that shouldn't be as thoughtful as it is

+ Omg you are soooo right that bff!reader wouldn't be the one to tell Jack about her and Quinn. She wouldn't be able to find the words. If she tells him the truth, she believes she risks rocking some foundational truths Jack holds about his older brother but at the same time, Jack knows her. He knows she'll be holding back so it's easier to let Quinn tell him

+ Jack prefacing his lecture with 'I love you. You know that.' my friendssss I love them 🫂😭 Initially, he'd be upset at her keeping such a huge secret from him but the longer he sits on it, the more it bothers him. She isn't the type to keep any secret from him. It took her a few days to tell him she hooked up with Z but she did tell him with a queasy looking expression on her face. Her reaction when trying to explain also sets off those alarm bells like you said but he can't let himself consider why. It's Quinn. Quinn would never do anything untoward towards you. '<- his only defense in this scenario. it WILL be doing the heavy lifting. successfully.' Exactly!!!

+ 'so he won't think about it. and just like he ignored the emotions from your impending move from jersey until he couldn't, he'll do the same here.' <- There's a futility to it as well he's not acknowledging but he knows deep down. The truth of the matter is nothing will be done even if he is to find out Quinn did something to you. That knowledge won't save you. It won't save him either. The both of you will just have to exist with it

+ The really fucked thing to me in bff!au is that reader does back away when Jack gets a girlfriend (but I won't sit here and lie to you guys. There are lines she still does cross bc it's so ingrained in their friendship. She actively works to be cognizant of it though which is like...a bandaid on a gaping wound but wtv) but Jack hates it sooo much. He hates when reader makes the decision for him to put his gf first like hello if he cared he'd already be doing that, come back. #codependency

Quinn scrambles to pause the movie. Kate Hudson stills on the screen as Matthew McConaughey's character tells her to smile.

"What are you talking about?"

You can feel him looking at you. Biting your cheek, you turn to him slowly. The light from the TV washes him out terribly and the dark circles under his eyes seem grey.

"One of his teammates thought Jack and I were together," you lie, picking at the blanket you're sharing.

Your call with Jack from last night bounces around in your head. His contemplativeness before he said goodnight has been lurking under your skin all day.

I've been treating Quinn how I treat you though?

And somehow, wires are being crossed on Quinn's side. But that should be impossible because Jack's your best friend. You've only ever treated him as your best friend.

"Someone's always saying that," Quinn says, confused. "Why is it bothering you now?"

"It just is."

He searches your expression and whatever he expects to find is not there. Whatever half-baked panic Jack unintentionally lit within you is kept under careful lock and key as you meet his gaze, overly aware of how unaffected you are trying to appear despite your words.

"I don't know," he says eventually. "You guys have always been like this."

Your heart sinks. "So you think we're too close."

Quinn shrugs. "I don't know any different when it comes to you and Jack." He looks down, deliberate as he swallows thickly. "We all thought you guys would end up dating."

"We?" you repeat.

He nods. "Me, Luke, and our mom."

"But not anymore?"

He considers this and then shakes his head. His eyes are piercing as he lifts his head. "You and Jack are something I can't understand. But it works for you guys."

"It does," you agree quietly.

But it works because Jack understands you and vice versa. You know what place the two of you are coming from. If Quinn can't pick up on that though for himself, maybe there is something wrong with how you and Jack operate.

"Didn't your last boyfriend break up with you because of Jack?"

You jolt, curling in on yourself. He's both right and wrong. Jack had been in a thorn in your boyfriend's side for the majority of your relationship but one he was willing to swallow for the time being.

Quinn, however, was the last straw.

"Jack's ex-girlfriend hated your guts," he adds unhelpfully. "I'm pretty sure they also broke up for the same reason."

It's stupid but the addendum annoys you into telling the truth.

"He didn't break up with me because of Jack," you say. "We broke up because of you."

"What?"

He's fighting to keep his face blank but the corners of his mouth are twitching. You can't tell if he means to smile or frown.

"He hated that we were so close," you sigh, pulling your knees up to your chest. "Jack was one thing but me letting you move in without talking to him when you got traded was too far." You scowl. "Which was ridiculous to say by the way. You're my friend and Jack's brother. Why wouldn't I let you stay with me? And obviously we were going to hang out a lot. We live together."

Quinn doesn't even try to follow what memories are being dug up now that you've been reminded of your ex-boyfriend.

"He broke up with you because we're friends?" he surmises, laughter emphasizing the wrong words.

"Because he thought I treated you like Jack," you correct instinctively.

A trace of guilt swirls in your stomach. It's only been a few days since Jack was here and less than twenty four hours since he asked that halting question about you and Quinn. Maybe there is some truth to your ex-boyfriend's accusations if Jack is questioning if there is something to read between the lines you and Quinn exist within.

"What's wrong with how I treat Jack?"

It's not a question you expect an answer to. It's not one you want an answer to either.

What you want is to not have to think about this.

"I don't want things to change," you admit, wrapping your arms around your shins.

How would that even work? You and Jack are so intertwined, sometimes, it feels like you are constantly waiting to be found out. That when someone finally breeches the final layer that makes you you, they'll find Jack. And when they find Jack, they'll realize there are parts of you that you'll never cede to them.

"Who said anything about changing?" Quinn asks, bewildered. "You just said it works for you guys."

"But even you said don't understand it," you say.

He moves closer to you, bracing his hand on the cushion. "I don't," he agrees. "But I don't need to. All I need to understand is that Jack is important to you and that you're important to him. As important as Luke and I are to him. The right person only needs to understand that. End of story."

He's so close you can see how his chest rises and falls. You can smell your detergent on his clothes mixed with the cologne he picked up last fall when you visited Vancouver.

In the same way you've never been able to quite understand how Quinn, Jack, and Luke are so close to a degree that perfectly straddles the line between advantageous and disadvantageous, Quinn has not been able to put a finger on the thread that connects Jack and you.

+ I loveeee clothes sharing and I think Jack is big on it with his partners lol definitely all the brothers are big on clothes sharing with each other but this isn't about them

+ You definitely do develop a teensy crush on Z! I didn't say it explicitly bc I didn't know if anyone would wanna fuck with that but he reminds you of what Jack was like before. For dman!reader, Quinn's always been weirdly intense about her but for forward!reader, you did have a period of time where Jack treated you very very neutrally. You don't let yourself think about why you get butterflies in your stomach sometimes around Z nor why when Jack's on your nerves, your thoughts wander to Trevor when you're about to fall asleep

+ 'why'd I have to get the weird one :/' 💀

+ You mention thinking about breaking up with Jack to Jamie and Trevor once and their eyes nearly pop out of their heads bc whattt you guys are so perfect for each other!!! And Trevor's drunk and loyal enough to tell Jack that night about what you said. Rip

+ I went with what I thought was the more realistic route of Jack leaving you in Trevor's care mainly because I see Jack as very possessive (there are some caveats ofc as you've seen with my other fics but Trevor is new to my universe so I'm trying to figure out where I'd like to fit him haha) so he wouldn't want to share you, especially when you're still trying to find a way to escape him. Maybe if he felt more secure with you but yk

+ All this to say: it would very much be an out of the frying pan and into the fire situation. With Trevor, it's much more sinister. His personality is the perfect shield for what he really wants from you. No one would suspect him to be capable of manipulating you or forcing your hand in his favor. Trevor? You think Trevor is a bad guy? No way.

+ And you wouldn't believe it for a long, long time. You wouldn't believe it even once you've been trapped. You'd tell yourself he doesn't know how intense he's coming off or that he's slowly pushing your boundaries to the point of no return. Trevor wouldn't do that to you. He's always been so sweet and so goofy and so kind, it's not in his DNA to do something wrong to you

+ He is so nice. So so so nice. All of your friends think so. (when did he become a part of your friend group...?) He's always looking out for you which is why when you drink a little too much one night, you don't hesitate to take his hand and let him lead you home. Your memory after that is foggy but you do remember his stubble scratching against the soft skin of your thigh and his soothing voice telling you he'll make it better when you whined against that sensitivity

+ In general, there would absolutely have to be people who don't believe in soulmates. And there would also have to be people who believe in soulmates but not necessarily in a romantic sense either. And if you live in a world where soulmates aren't common, can you imagine the shit you get if you're in either of those groups? And then it turns out you do have a soulmate? Rip to you

+ With how traditional the NHL runs, if Jack or Quinn got paired with a soulmate who did not care...they're losing their fucking minds lmfao It doesn't matter that maybe they also want to have fun for a while before settling down, you weren't supposed to feel that way about them

+ With how dickish Jack can be during media, it's not something you find worth the risk like you said in a way that makes you unexcited to be associated with him. He's not exactly a loose canon but if you can control the fallout, you will to the best of your ability

+ In the hypothetical switch up to Trev's team, you are absolutely playing the role of infatuated girlfriend with Jack in front of them. You make sure to remember to casually touch him and bring him into the conversation and laugh at the right times and give him that perfectly curated affectionate annoyed look when he takes things a step too far. It's a hit to your pride but you'd take this over Jack getting all pissy because you are making the most of your situation 🤐 There's a psychology study that shows if something ends well despite being horrible for the majority of the time, people tend to view the experience as a whole as much better than it was and that's what you aim to do here with Jack. Sure Z wearing your jacket got under his skin and sure you should've laughed less throughout the night but Jack's always loved having you under him so you'll make sure he remembers tonight much more fondly than it was :)

+ Crying none of us believe in him taking things slow even for his own sake aldfkasdj all he wants is for everyone to know he's yours and that you're his! 😸

+ 'Your strategy for making the present bearable is making your future grim 😭😭' the thesis of any fic I write but Jack in particular omg u nailed it. You are fucked no matter how you go about it so why not make your present bearable bc it's not like your future will be 😔