our father who aren't in heaven

Sqh has had a crush for years now, and doesn't want mbj to see him like this, so he tries to hide.

But he's to drunk for this and just ends up crouching by a door with his hands covering his eyes.

"What... are you doing?" Mbj asks

"I'm hiding from my king!" This just confuses mbj more before he smells the alcohol on him.

"Why?" A smple question, and sqh didn't seem to realize the person he was talking to was mbj.

There was a long-suffering whine before sqh said,

"I don't think he know just how much I want to burry my face in his fucking pecks when he wears that stupid shirt." Sqh sniffed

"And I don't want him to kill me. He's too pretty. I have to die from something ugly."

Shang Qinghua: My lord! I don't know what happened, but it was years ago and it shouldn't have caused a baby now!!

Luo Binghe: YOU-

Shen Qingqiu, storming in: Binghe!

Luo Binghe: Shizun, please let me take care of him!

Shen Qingqiu: Binghe, remember that thing I do? The one where I blame Shang Qinghua on things that aren't (technically) his fault?

Luo Binghe: Oh... So it's mine?

Shen Qingqiu: Yes

Luo Binghe: ...

Luo Binghe: You had sex with Shang Qinghua?

But once the idea has entered his head, he can't quite shake it. See the thing is, the Mobei Jun he wrote in PIDW actually did wear whole entire outfits most the time. As the pinnacle of masculine ideals he was more into the high collars and buttoned buttons and cool armor that actually covered his vital points than his SV counterpart.

Shang Qinghua's just never really focused on the discrepancy because, well, most of the time he's around the Moboobs he's not thinking critically about anything at all. But, yeah. Even though ice demons don't have a problem being scantily clad in the cold, it is kind of weird that Mobei Jun dresses like a total harlot?

Not that he's shaming his king! Mobei Jun can dress however he wants and Shang Qinghua will enjoy the view!

He starts to think that perhaps he should figure out how he butterfly effected this particular change, though. Mysteries are dangerous. Obviously it's not actually his gaze that Mobei Jun is trying to draw, but there has to be some reason for it. Maybe he just spends so much more time in the human realms getting overheated that he needs the extra ventilation? Shang Qinghua decides to test a few theories, jokingly telling himself that the first thing to do is eliminate the assertion that the all you can eat beef buffet is being set out for his enjoyment.

It'll probably be easy to debunk. He just finds a way to shoehorn in some compliments on Mobei Jun's looks into their next few interactions, totally bracing himself to get his ass kicked the first couple of times for even mentioning anything at all. At the very least he's expecting his king to maybe take some of his outfits out of rotation, like he is not expecting a positive reception to his observation that "this mantle really emphasizes my king's broad shoulders and powerful chest, he should try wearing it shirtless" to result in... Mobei Jun showing up forty-eight hours later in the mantle and a loin cloth and precious little else?!

Then it keeps happening. Shang Qinghua decides he must have chosen the wrong kind of debunking test. Clearly, his king's a little starved for compliments! It's getting a bit absurd!

He decides damage control is in order before he accidentally praises Mobei Jun into becoming an exhibitionist (if it's not already too late...) and he pivots to... well. Leering, a bit. He spreads his compliments out more, also being sure the compliment Mobei Jun on wearing, like, actual coverage, and looking cool in armor and furs and etc (not hard, because he does). But he lets his king catch his eyes wandering a few times.

He's fully prepared to get his ass kicked for that, and he does. Not as badly as he'd feared, but it does net him some impressive bruises. It doesn't seem to deter his king from dressing how he pleases regardless, and Shang Qinghua despairs. Well of course some wandering eyes wouldn't turn Mobei Jun off of his preferred wardrobe! He's a grown ass demon king, not some uncertain youth who would blush and cover up!

Damn though, refuting this whole "he's doing it for you" theory is more complicated than he thought it'd be. Maybe he should move on to just, figuring out the actual reason, rather than attempting it process-of-elimination style...?

Can't stop thinking about how the only times we've seen Armand lose control over his facial expression is when he is being rejected, and how he tries to force a smile each time 😭😭

When in acute distress, Armand will smile a pained, mirthless smile.