*skipping stones across an artificial lake the Eridians made Grace*
Grace: This is nice.
Rocky, who does not understand this Earth activity: Take that you fucking lake.
Mike Driver
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
AnasAbdin
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
d e v o n

Discoholic đŞŠ
Show & Tell

JVL
Keni
I'd rather be in outer space đ¸
TVSTRANGERTHINGS

â

Janaina Medeiros
Xuebing Du
i don't do bad sauce passes
ojovivo

blake kathryn
we're not kids anymore.
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@queer-nerd-mess
*skipping stones across an artificial lake the Eridians made Grace*
Grace: This is nice.
Rocky, who does not understand this Earth activity: Take that you fucking lake.

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me and u both ouppy
is anybody gonna pet the gentle freakâŚâŚ.the gentle freak is gonna grow sad and anxious if nobody pets itâŚâŚis nobody gonna pet the freakâŚâŚnobody?âŚ..nobody pet the gentle freak?âŚ..
i love punishing apps by turning off all their notifications
I should be doing more to appreciate the lack of marvel movies in today's popular culture. I once yearned for marvel movies to have this level of irrelevance. They used to feel almost ozymandian, like an empire that had no beginning and no end. and now tony stark iron man is naught but two vast and trunkless legs of stone.

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liking and reblogging your mutuals' posts
what people dont get about divorces is the Whole Thing About Dogs
i have written custody plans for labrador retrievers more complex than i have for children. i went to four years of undergrad, three years of law school, and sat for the bar exam to write up custody exchange provisions for dogs with hyphonated last names
my clients are paying $295 an hour for me to go to court and litigate who makes veterinary decisions for Chuckles the Goldfish and theres literally nothing i can do to stop them
framing these tags and hanging them up in my office to remind me that it can always be worse
hey sexy. I can tell by the frequency of your blog updates that you are once again avoiding it all
like to charge, reblog to cast.

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Ilya finds an odd picture of Shane in a photo album at one point. He's maybe three, he's sitting on the massive purple sofa that Ilya has discovered the Hollanders owned when Shane was born. He's frowning, red-cheeked and he's got a strange plastic case on his thumb.
"Yuna," he says, shifting his elbows on the table to point at it. "What is this on his hand? Was broken?"
Shane's head snaps up from across the table, where he's pretending that Photo Album Time is very boring to him and not worth paying attention to. He hasn't scrolled on the article he's pretending to read for over five minutes.
"I never broke a bone as a kid," he says, brows furrowed. "Not until U13, when that fucking kid from Guelph--"
Yuna and Shane both inhale quickly through their noses in what Ilya has learned to recognize as a moderative measure, lest they start yelling about something that everyone else on Earth has forgotten about.
"No," Yuna says, once her face looks a little less intense. "No, it wasn't broken. It was this...contraption that the dentist gave us to correct his thumb-sucking. He was so mad about it, we only put it on him a few times."
"Oh, Jesus," Shane mutters, eyes going back to his phone.
"Aw," Ilya says. "Poor baby Shane." He taps his finger against one little red cheek and laughs. "You really do look so mad, sweetheart. How did you make him stop?"
"Hmm...you know, I don't remember," Yuna sighs, tilting her head. "I guess he just stopped by himself eventually. Do you remember, Shane?"
"No," Shane says, shortly.
"Of course, that didn't get rid of the oral fixation," Yuna sighs, adjusting her reading glasses as she flips the page. "The things you used to chew on, Shane. Pens and straws and--"
"Mom," Shane snaps, while Ilya vibrates beside him. "Can we not?"
"I was afraid to give him popsicles because I thought he would gnaw on the sticks until he got a splinter in his stomach."
"Mom!"
"Well, honey, it's true! And you did outgrow it eventually, so it's not as if you have to be embarrassed."
"Oh, you did?" Ilya says, shoulders shaking. "You outgrew the, uh, oral fixation?"
"Stop," Shane hisses.
"Mm. Excuse me." Ilya stands from the table and sweeps out onto the back porch, though the sliding door does nothing to prevent the sound of his guffaws from floating back into the kitchen.
"You know," Yuna says, "I'm just going to assume that this is some kind of language barrier thing--"
"Please stop."
remember when i joked that 14-year-old anarchomarxists bullied me off tumblr and the actual anarchomarxists on tumblr got offended and were like, "They were actually 14-year-old council communists; we anarchomarxists have nothing to do with bullying authors off of social media platforms"?
That's what's wrong with the Left.
do not go to Dr. Kenneth Wolf for top surgery
I went to him because he was 1.) the cheapest possible option and since I needed crowdfunding that seemed best 2.) within driving distance of my friends whoâd be able to host me. I didnât have any complications and I donât hate my results, so the fact that he stopped offering free revisions after COVID (including for people who had their surgeries before the pandemic) and ghosts everyone isnât a huge deal personally. I do have moderate to severe dog-earring right in the middle my chest which limits what clothing I can wear and have inquired about possible revisions with other surgeons (so far no one has been willing to operate on other drâs work and have told me Iâd need to pay the price of a full secondary top surgery). Dr. Wolf famously ghosts all his patients after surgery and has strict weight limits.
HOWEVER I accompanied my friend to their top surgery at the University of Michigan last year that made Dr. Wolfâs entire process seem back alley and sketchy by comparison. My friend had extensive pre- and post-surgical monitoring and extreme sanitary precautions. Dr. Wolf just had me take off my shirt and slapped me on the operation table still wearing my street clothes and then scraped me up and sent me home the moment I regained consciousness. His bedside manner was offputting and uncomfortable. It has been impossible to contact him ever since, even to ask politely why my stitches look so different from his other results. Other people with much worse results have also been ghosted.
OH AND ALSO when I asked if he could swap my left and right nipples just for the hell of it he said âyeah sure lolâ but apparently youâre not supposed to do that because there is the risk of like, manually metastasizing cancer cells. lol. I did ask for it and I think I am at very low risk for breast cancer but I do think a responsible surgeon should at least know about and warn you of that possibility before agreeing to it.
my friends and my ex were great caretakers who made the recovery process easy and kind of fun but knowing what I know now makes the whole experience retroactively a little bit traumatic
An additional anecdote: My roommate got top surgery with this guy during our freshman year of college, and he had no family or other friends in the area to accompany him. On any normal day I would've skipped class to do so, but I had a quiz worth like a fifth of my grade and not enough advance warning to ask if I could take the alternate time (my roommate told me about this literally the morning of).
Dr. Wolf operated on an unaccompanied patient and let him get in a Lyft by himself immediately post-surgery.
A week or so he had to go back in to deal with a minor complication, and wanted to go by himself again. So I emailed Dr. Wolf to ask if I should push back and insist on coming with this time, and got this reply:
We always feel safer for the patient to have somebody with him. If it was the hospital, they would refuse to even do him without somebody with him.
I guess it technically beats operating on him alone a second time, but straight-up admitting that a hospital would never do the kind of thing he does is... telling, I think.
wow yeah I donât love that
he seems to have been a lot more communicative in the past when he offered revisions but I donât know if his other policies used to be better
also correction: there was a one week follow up appointment where he changed the bandages and told me it looked fine but there was no other communication after that. also he used penrose drains which I didnât personally mind but was a lot grosser for my caretakers because it meant I was just oozing directly into my bandages, soaking through them, and staining clothes/bedding.
Making this its own post because I occasionally remember this and can't stop laughing
When I was 14, my friends and I went to see Madagascar 3 - told our parents and then walked to and from the theater by ourselves. When I got home, my mom asked me all kinds of questions about the movie, and I told her about it, and I kept singing the stupid Afro Circus song
and eventually she gave in and was like, "Wait, you guys really went to see Madagascar? I assumed you were lying to us and sneaking into a rated R movie." And I fear I have never felt so lame as I did in that moment.

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Out of Touch
Out of Touch Thursday
OUT OF TOUCH THURSDAY
but im out of my head when youâre not aroundâŚ
happy birthday.