Schrodinger's Gender

It was invented by one person for a specific purpose - to have a universalizable way of establishing historical dates, rather than having to deal with dynastically based date systems. And it was a really good idea. This is not surprising, since Bede is basically the father of Historiography. He also is the guy who gave us the notion of Primary Sources. Bede is amazing.

When a guy revolutionizes the entire way calendaring is done, he has the right to set his zero point wherever he pleases.

People have pointed out that one problem with CE notation is that it presents itself as neutral when it is exactly the same system as AD. What exactly is "common" about this era? The zero point doesn't become neutral just by effacing its source.

(Also BCE is nonsense. Just use negative numbers)

It makes sense for scholarly tradition to not want to be tied to a specific religion. But scholarly tradition is very enthusiastic about being tied to earlier scholarly tradition. The convention of AD was established by a scholar for a scholarly purpose. We know his name. We know what he was doing, and why, and how. And he was doing it better than anybody else. That is worth honoring.

Rather than pretending that it's a neutral system, acknowledge that it's not. It's not some naturally occurring "common era," it's the system developed by Bede, centered around dates that were important to him personally (but which he intended to be universally applicable).

And as they talk about it, it’ll become clear that they’re thinking about that label because there’s something in their life that’s uncomfortable, and they can see people with that label NOT doing that thing, and they’re wondering if they have a right to also not do it.

So this is me, giving you permission. Label or not, YOU ARE ALLOWED to:

Stop dating people (of a particular gender or in general)

Start dating people (of a particular gender or in general)

Have less (or no) sex

Have more sex (or with more people)

Get married

Not get married

Plan to never get married

Have a friend more important than people you date or have sex with

Wear skirts

Not wear skirts

Wear make-up

Not wear make-up

Cut your hair

Grow your hair

Try new pronouns

Wear a binder

Use a cane

Use fidget toys

Use noise-cancelling headphones

Take painkillers (or other over-the-counter medication)

Ask for help

Not eat that food

Ask for food alternatives

Not drink alcohol

Avoid that location with the crowds and the noise

You are allowed.

You are allowed to do these things some of the time, or all of the time, or only once.

If they make you feel better in yourself, maybe someday you’ll decide to take on the label that applies to many people who do them. But you don’t NEED a label.

Sitting down at the table, I remembered the scars on my arm. The universal signifier of "This Kid Needs Help." Maybe his kindness was only out of pity. He saw those and assumed there was some great misery and wanted to offer me some relief. It's generally good to be kind to people who are hurting. But I wasn't hurting that bad.

The thing is, there is some great misery. People generally aren't doing that great. There is a great misery within me and within him and within everyone, and some people notice the pain, some people express it, others don't. But we all suffer from something.

It doesn't matter if someone seems to deserve some relief. Everyone needs it. Everyone is suffering constantly. Some more than others, but still. This Kid Needs Help applies to everyone.

Thirty minutes later, I went to get a second pastry, intending to pay and leave a tip this time. It was the same cashier. As he reached to grab it for me, I saw scars on his arm.

϶—T÷h÷a÷t÷s÷A÷G÷o÷o—d—P o

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀i n

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀t

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀S

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀I⠀⠀⠀⠀H

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀T

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀F

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀U

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀C

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀K

⠀⠀⠀⠀M⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Y

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀B⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀EA

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀D

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀S

he is talking about theatre. he is talking about theatre when he was younger. he says, "of course, it was AIDS then." in the pause, you ask him. clumsy and quiet and 16 and "straight," you ask him. what was it like.