Once You Pop...

I’m literally so so incredibly good at being cozy and in bed covered in blankets and I recieve no recognition for it 😔

if psychic Pokemon glow like in the anime when they use their telekinesis or whatever I bet that like at least once a week their trainer sees them glowing with no floating item in sight and have to be like “WHAT ARE YOU FLOATING? WHAT DO YOU HAVE” like when your cat is chewing something you didn’t feed them

I’m crying because when my dad was eighteen he was going to join the airforce and then the night before he had a dream that Jesus slapped him in the face with a gigantic fish and asked him what he was doing and he woke up and thought, “Jesus is right what am I doing?” And that’s why my dad did not join the military. 

ID: a tag that reads “this is the only christian vision i actually think was sent by god.” end ID

Wawa?

11 years of aeiou…

The only time I've ever saluted someone on instinct was when Vinny was playing mgs4 and he found out if you shook the controller while calling rose her boobs would shake and he immediately called otacon and you could physically hear him shaking the controller and asking "why aren't his tits moving "

Remember that guy on vine that would climb around shirtless with flowers on his head, and he’d keep saying “my berries.” But then it turned out he was a CIA plant put on Vine to track down leftist activists who were active on the app?

i literally just found out about the “girl from ‘is this allowed’ vine was really making out with a mannequin” controversy and now this? this is ruinedchildhood for millennials.

i’m sorry my berries guy was what now

A nice young Italian man I guess. I made this up for notes.

funniest thing in the lord of the rings is how no one can kill gollum because whenever they get close they're like "oh my god he's so pathetic and ugly i can't bear to fucking look at him. jesus christ." so they just imprison him and then he slips through the fucking bars like a looney tunes character. and this happens multiple times.