It's always Barry Allen loving hours here

ILL HEAR NO ILL OF THESE BOOTS. These pointy ass heeled boots that everyone looks fabulous in.

sometimes i get weirdly anxious about the fact that thousands of years of evolution have led to my specific bloodline and it will almost certainly be ending with me. but then i remember the same is true of like every fly that dies in a drink before it gets the chance to reproduce so like. who am i to get all precious about the concept of bloodlines really. who give a shit. my ancestors arent any better than that flys ancestors.

@imadoctornotanescalator Him!

Love a fic that presents itself as a collection of in-universe texts. Tweets describing the plot of the original text from the perspective of a layman. Essays and reports written by diegetic academics and journalists. Massively downvoted reddit posts written by conspiracy theorists that accurately predict the plot. It slaps so hard

@imadoctornotanescalator

the mexican football team has a 17 yrs old player and one of the funniest outcomes of this is that he cannot appear in any ad for gambling or drinking so he only appears in candy and milk advertisements. his first world cup and he's not even legally allowed to drive. his nickname is "morita" (little berry). he's three apples tall.

really recommend getting a partner with a different religion than you and very little knowledge of your religion because the opportunities for explaining things to each other are just exquisite

yesterday she told me some story about the Buddha's wife and child and I was like. Wait. He fucked? And she was like yeah of course he fucked, why wouldn't he, he was the most attractive and loveable and and wise and etc. person who ever lived. why would he not fuck.

this morning she looked perplexed in the kitchen at me and said "did Jesus not fuck?"

me (crazy eyes, covered in blood): I NEED to finish writing my fanfic. so I can start writing a different fanfic.

you people aren't CASTING