i call this one "the sword of damocles"

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@psychic-vamp
i call this one "the sword of damocles"

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I'm just going to say it - body hair (and beauty standards in general) is truly one of the final frontiers of women's issues in the West. Too many women just love their gilded cage too much. It shocks me how virulently women will defend it. I barely open my mouth and the "well I like how it feels. it just makes me feel cleaner. sensory issues. I do it for me. feminism is about choosing (to conform)." brigade come rushing in by the dozens.
Well I don't like how it feels. I don't feel cleaner without body hair. I don't prefer not having body hair. But who will advocate for women like me, but me? For women who do like hair removal, they are advocated for every time they step out of the house and see 99% of the female population also conforming to that standard, or when they watch a movie and see all the shaved actresses, or view an advertisment, or open a magazine, or watch a music video, or scroll through social media, or walk down the streets without receiving insults and glares for having a completely normal bodily feature.
You genuinely can't even point out that hairlessness is a man-made standard without women losing their shit and acting like they are totally immune to propaganda they've been exposed to from birth. I'm so tired.
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ok think of your favorite horror movie. is it more creepy or wet
Creepy
Wet
I KNOW many are both. but ☝️they'll always lean one way or the other ok. Follow your heart
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I actually do think we should discourage women from becoming housewives. Do not become financially dependent on a man. That's how a lot of women ended up dead over the years. A man gets violent suddenly and you have to choose between homelessness or potentially dying at his hand because you have an enormous gap in your resume and no degrees or certifications or anything that will help you pursue a career that will allow you to be financially independent. He owns your bank account. His name is probably the one on the car. Try and leave and he can report it stolen. Where will you go then?
Don't become a housewife.
And if you do become a housewife, take steps to protect yourself. Make sure you’re legally married, for starters; stay-at-home girlfriends have very little legal recourse to claim their partner’s assets in a breakup. Make sure your name is on the house deed/rental agreement, and have your car in your name, even if your spouse is paying for it. Have your spouse transfer money every month into an account solely in your name, so you can buy yourself things without needing permission, but also so you can save up to leave if needed.
If your spouse fights you on any of this, then don’t quit your job. The tradwife to poverty pipeline is real, and so is financial abuse.
also, many women/people experience controlling behaviour and domestic violence from their partner for the first time during pregnancy. don’t risk thinking “he’s just stressed, it’ll get better when the baby comes” because it won’t. neither you and your child will ever be safe with that man. get out as early and safely as you can
"You can now sort your likes from oldest to newest on web and iOS. Do you remember what your first liked post was?"
oh dear
oh its bad back there.
every day it just concerns me how little compassion people have. no compassion for those living in the global south. no compassion for immigrants. no compassion for disabled ppl. no compassion for addicts. no compassion for prisoners. no compassion for children. like holy shit ...
i made a separate post about this but actually there are plenty of people cough white people who care about animals more than they ever do human people . not what i'm talking about make your own post
The moral of Death Note is that cops raise evil children

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the fact that "eco" and "ethical" are two separate concerns in the global north, and that "eco" is a much more popular concern, with many "eco" products being made in actual sweatshops, is a big part of why i am The Joker
if you think this is an exaggeration or splitting hairs where it doesn't matter:
i used to work at a Local Organic Produce store that's popular with the lefties in my city who are interested in food justice. i quit for a lot of reasons, mostly the boss, but something i will always remember is one of our suppliers coming in to drop off produce, being told her check wasn't ready, and her laughing and responding it didn't matter -- even a low bank account was more than enough to pay the migrants who picked her produce. i am not filling in any blanks here. she said this.
after quitting, this was a common story i told people about my time there. some then became annoyed at me, acting like i was a wokescold trying to undermine the store's "eco" mission with unrelated "ethical" concerns. but, like -- if food justice isn't for the people making food, who the fuck is it for?
like, don't get me wrong. my contention here is that the things go hand in hand, and that something which is unethical isn't actually eco. after all, humans are a part of the fucking ecosystem, and if a product can only be made by unsustainably exploiting humans, then it's unsustainable. doesn't matter which chemicals were used in making it, or whether or not animals were factory farmed.
they *cannot* be separated. a product cannot be either eco or ethical — it must be both. a product that is made through human suffering cannot be eco for the reasons you said; a product that causes human suffering by contributing to the destruction of the ecosystem cannot be ethical. it must be both and we must insist on both
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“we need to stop the stigma towards drug users and addicts” and “we need to challenge the idea that being sober makes you boring” and “we need to stop acting like binge drinking to the extent you’re doing medical damage is fun and normal for young people” are all ideas that can and should coexist.
just so we’re clear, the threshold for “binge drinking to the extent you’re doing medical damage” is waaaay lower than you think.
I work in an obstetrician and gynaecologist’s office. we have to tell patients on a regular basis that they are binge drinking weekly when they think they are simply consuming a normal amount of alcohol on the weekends.
having more than 3 drinks in a single sitting if you have an estrogen based endocrine system is a binge that is medically significant.
having more than 5 in a sitting is a medically significant binge for someone with a testosterone based endocrine system.
every time you do this, it significantly impacts your risk of getting breast cancer, and damages your liver. it takes time to recover from that liver damage. if you’re having a 3-5 or more drink binge on a weekly basis, you are an alcoholic, medically speaking, and your liver is not recovering.
again: the bar for what binge drinking is, medically, is so much lower than what you think it is.
alcohol is a really toxic substance and not something you should fuck around with.
again: if you have an estrogenized hormone system (common for most women), then 3 drinks is a binge. if you have a testosteronized hormone system (common for most men), then 5 drinks is a binge.
anything above that number, consumed as frequently as weekly or more, and you’re medically a binge drinking alcoholic.
also, if you’re drinking any quantity of alcohol 6 days a week or more, that’s another threshold at which, medically speaking, you meet the definition of alcoholism. your liver needs more days without alcohol in your system than just one a week to recover and be healthy.
I don’t say any of this to shame anyone—to me, alcoholism or substance use disorders aren’t a sign of weakness or moral failing. and most of us genuinely don’t know this stuff.
rather—I point this out because it’s important to reduce harm, and find ways to live healthier, happier lives. there is a life outside of constant binge drinking. it’s not always easy to find it. but it’s out there. you deserve a life where your emotional needs are met by something other than alcohol, and a life in which your liver is healthy, and the ways you cope and celebrate and find joy don’t put you at increased risk of cancer.
also–even if alcohol is the only way you can self-medicate, or if you choose to go on with your alcohol usage anyway regardless of other options–you still deserve to know what it’s doing to your body.
information is key. you don’t have to stop drinking, but the utter lack of education on alcohol + the normalization of binge drinking in current society leads to many people drinking without any idea of what it’s doing to their bodies.
addicts deserve accurate medical information regardless of what they decide to do with it. for some people, losing liver function is worth the benefits they get from binge drinking, but they can’t make that choice if they don’t know what the consequences are to begin with.
addicts deserve accurate medical information regardless of what they decide to do with it.
Can someone tell me the definition of one drink in this context?
Because a vodka shot is not the same as (idk, some low alcohol percentage alcohol.)
So, what does 3 (or 5) drinks mean.
0.6 ounces of alcohol is a standard drink. Examples include 12 ounces of 5% alcohol beer, or 1.5 ounces of 40% alcohol liquor.
are we confident it’s a hormone- related thing and not a size issue where in someone who is a larger overall body is going to have an easier time than someone with a smaller overall body?
do we have evidence of this being hormone related? Like in trans individuals or maybe people with PCOS or intersex people or is this purely body size?
Are you saying hormone-related but we just have evidence of, say, cisgender men being able to drink more than cisgender women? Do we even have evidence for this or is this just generic medical recommendations? What’s the science actually saying here?
I was going to ask. This sounds like the kind of thing that was devised a little (not totally) disingenuously in the sense that sexism absolutely played a role, and then it got perpetuated without much further investigation.
I would like to be wrong but this sounds like a thing where “hormones” are a stand in for “sex at birth” and where the real issue lies is in body size and composition. Estrogen OS = overall shorter with more fat. Testosterone OS = overall taller with more muscle. Fat/muscle affects how things are broken down and used, and how much of those things someone needs. Meds, alcohol, food.
Not trying to be an asshole, fully believe that there are variations in how much people can tolerate and that body size and composition do tend to align with how the medical industry sorts people into two sexes. Just…I don’t trust research to look that deeply into things like this, once they start getting quoted.
Also just a smidge of “LADIES are delicate and too much of the demon rum will overwhelm their uteruses and they will swoon.” The way women are told they should eat less than a man their height and weight just because they are women, and women should eat less (delicate flowers, must not be seen to swallow meals like a snake, must not be allowed to get fat). No. You are feeding a body. If you aren’t feeding muscle, you are telling it to store fat.
This just sounds like science that is broadly right, for really stupid reasons.
(1500 calories is used as a starvation tactic in Guantanamo, btw, and it’s damaging physically and psychologically. Don’t do it to yourself.)
sexism in medicine is real, but alcohol absolutely has effects on hormone systems, specifically with estrogen.
For example, your liver screens excess estrogen from your body but will not do so efficiently if it is dealing with a damaging poison like alcohol. Having estrogen levels higher than your body would normally self regulate to is a major factor in breast cancer. Studies indicate that for people with estrogenized endocrine system alcohol consumption can increase the risk of breast cancer by as much as 35%
This also means that for anyone on HRT involving estrogen (common for a variety of situations, from menopause to transitioning) the risk of cancer goes up significantly when you are drinking. For example, post-menopausal women who are taking HRT and drink one or two alcoholic drinks per day have a breast cancer risk that is three times higher than women who don’t drink and don’t take HRT.
Alcohol also increases the risk of many types of cancer in people regardless of sex or hormonal system. Heavy drinking can increase the risk of stomach, prostate, and pancreas cancer (among others).
Light drinking, even a single drink each day, can increase the risk of several other types of cancer in any person (for instance liver cancer and colon cancer)
Of these, one notable and significant risk increase is for breast cancer in a person with high levels of estrogen.
Sexism and especially misogyny in medicine is a real issue but the information in this post is good and should not be dismissed on the assumption that medicine is probably wrong and sexist when it says things are “different for women than men”, even tho we may wish they would use other language to describe that situation (i do like estrogenized endocrine system here, because that is the relevant part of the biology).
But the main takeaway here should be that even light drinking seems to increase the likelihood of many types of cancer for all people.
arousal! repulsion! arousal! repulsion! arousal! repulsion! arousal! repulsion!
For anybody not caught up: Tennessee just passed a new map that pretty much makes it so black neighborhoods have no power in local votes. Two things about this. While protestors were chanting "No Jim Crow", white Tennessee lawmakers were caught laughing on video. On top of this, Representative Justin Pearson and his brother KeShaun Pearson were arrested for trying to give their takes on the matter (which is not only their legal right but literally his job). If you give a shit about black people, help fight this. We can't allow a return to Jim Crow.
Heyyy guess where I live
A local paper had some great photographs, all taken by Nicole Hester:
The day before, Rep. Justin Pearson tries to attend a Senate Committee meeting and is barred access by the Sergeant at Arms.
Lawmakers and protesters link arms as the descend the capitol steps.
Once inside the chamber, Democratic representatives continued to stand together with arms linked.
They continued standing together with arms linked as votes were cast.
Democratic representatives take a group photo protesting the redistricting.
Rep. Justin Jones burns a photo of the Confederate flag with the words, We will not go back.
And stomps the ashes.
KeShaun Pearson being escorted from the building by the Staties.
KeShaun Pearson (left) being taken into custody. Rep. Justin Pearson (right) showing his support of his brother.
Additional information: State lawmakers have been gunning for Pearson and Jones nearly their entire terms. Most notably, in 2023, the House expelled them for participating in a protest at the Capitol. Their districts had to have special elections to have them reinstated.
Pearson is one of the plaintiffs of a lawsuit seeking an injunction against the redistricting.
The city most affected by the redistricting is Memphis, where locals are fighting against xAI's data center, which has been operating with very little oversight and is poisoning the people who live there. Here is a previous post on that with more information and more sources.

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when i was a kid i was so mad all the time bc i thought someday i'd have to be somebody's wife i didn't know it was optional. is everybody reminding the young girls in their lives that it's optional.
AND SO IS BEING SOMEBODY'S MOTHER‼️