[Gollum voice] they hates our pussy they hates it!!!!!!!

True crime podcast but you realize as you're listening that the host is just describing episodes of Scooby-Doo

we're like 8 years away from the inevitable scenario where some guy is having sex with his AI gf and his roommate turns on the microwave, causing her to malfunction and crush his wiener like a hydraulic press

people often assume im stupid just because of my words, and thougts, and actions,

Calling in sick to work because i cant get the crease in my socks to fit across my toes right

it's 4:14 which means it's about to be 9 pm if i'm not careful

do you ever see a post and wince because it’s so clearly a casually worded joke that op intended to make on their own blog where most people would see the clarification in the tags but it must have grown legs because now it’s at 15k with dozens of people in the notes criticizing op for wording their public statement in a way that didn’t plan for every possible instance and interpretation and op was literally just sitting there talking to themself

I feel like the fact this got popular without a dominant caption is a tribute to 2020