être libre

01/16/19

Marie Kondo didn’t do anything wrong, you’re just hating on her culture

First of all: Marie Kondo’s decluttering philosophy is not just some “woo-woo nonsense” she came up with on the fly. The Ascent explained that she’s using practices from Shintoism, which includes beliefs that nature and material things have spirits and must be treated with respect.

We all joke about what Toy Story “did” to us, but it really is true that many people feel an inexplicable guilt when they throw something away, not just because it feels wasted, but because we feel, somehow, vaguely, impossibly, maybe it can feel sorrow.

I’ve only seen this addressed a few times by organization experts, and even then it was mocked.

Marie Kondo connecting her culture with that universal worry and telling people it’s okay, normal, to have that anxiety, and to give them ways to cope with it (i.e. thanking the object for its time in your life) is a really effective way to help people let go of these unecessary possessions!

Moreover, in the United States, many of us have been raised by our parents’ generation on the idea of the “starter house,” a smaller space we deem only acceptable until we can “upgrade.” But our generation can’t afford that.

In the show, young couples with children say they don’t have enough space, that their house is too small, and Marie Kondo teaches them that in fact, they do, and it’s not, they just need to learn how to manage and prioritize their space. People end up happier about their situations and lives.

The truth is we do live in a highly materialistic and throwaway culture, in which we accumulate a lot that we don’t need, until eventually we are drowning in our own Stuff.

This is especially a problem among the poor and disabled (both of which I am), because we hold onto things we don’t need now in case we need them later because we can’t just buy them again. But I think that fear of throwing away something we’ll need later grows to extremes, until we are trapped in a mess created by our anxiety.

I think it’s extremely refreshing for an expert to come in without judgement, without looking at us as if being poor and living in a mess of hand-in-hand, like so many others do, and saying there is a way to bring peace to your space, no matter who you are. She meets people on a level they can function on. Everyone is different with different needs, and she works with that.

This anxiety, along with the judgement we are Used to feeling from people who have jobs like Marie Kondo is what has made so many people feel so defensive and negative about what she has to teach, but it’s no excuse for the racist and culturally negative attitudes people use alarms against her work.

I have OCD, I am poor, I have a clutter problem. Solving it isn’t easy. I’m getting rid of stuff I think I can’t possibly part with. But once it’s gone, I feel so much lighter.

this is the perfect grade of good luck

The Earth at night. Photographs taken by NASA.

ARIES

What you want: Someone to show off. Someone who makes you feel passionate and excited all the time. A hot body, a nice face. Someone with smooth moves.

What you need: Someone patient and forgiving. Someone intelligent and witty. Someone you won’t get bored of. Someone who won’t run away when things get rough.

TAURUS

What you want: A fixer-upper. Nicholas Sparks-type scenes. Lots of gifts. Undying attention. Someone who will agree with you and make you feel desirable and attractive.

What you need: Someone who shares your views. Someone who respects you. A healthy amount of attention and material gifts. Someone who knows they’re good enough for you. Someone who knows you’re good enough for them.

GEMINI

What you want: A genius. A comedian. A hot mess. In other words, your twin flame.

What you need: Wisdom to balance out knowledge. Someone with impulse control. Someone forgiving and understanding. Ears willing to listen… for a while.

CANCER

What you want: A romance-novel character. Lots of hugs, gifts, and reassurance. Someone who won’t hurt your feelings. Someone who knows exactly what you’re thinking and what you want.

What you need: Someone to help you lighten up a little. Honesty. Security. Someone extraordinarily patient. Loyalty. 

LEO

What you want: Someone to show off to your friends. Someone to make you more popular. Attention out the wazoo. An admirer, your biggest fan. Undying support in everything you do.

What you need: Someone wise and understanding. Someone you respect, and who respects you. Someone to be straight with you. Loyalty. Forgiveness. Someone who knows the value in the little gestures.

VIRGO

What you want: Someone self-sustainable. Intelligence and common sense. Someone who can give you space. Someone who will listen to you and accept your criticism.

What you need: Someone to light up your life. Someone you never get bored of. A bit of a mystery. Someone who knows who they are. Someone who appreciates all that you do.

LIBRA

What you want: Someone to be romantic with. That cute couple aesthetic. Attention. A pretty face and a brilliant mind.

What you need: A best friend. A mediator. Someone who won’t take advantage of you. Someone you can really talk to. 

SCORPIO

What you want: Someone who adores you. Submission. Omnipresence in their life. Complete devotion. Control. Passion.

What you need: A mystery. Respect. A healthy amount of push-back. Someone you know you can trust. Someone you know will not hurt you. Undying loyalty. Honesty.

SAGITTARIUS

What you want: A travel buddy. A daredevil. Someone spunky and free. Someone “exotic”, mysterious, foreign. Someone who isn’t interested in textbook romance. 

What you need: Someone who gets you. Someone with common sense. Someone who can forgive your little flubs. Independence. Consistency. Someone you could travel around the world with and not hate them afterwards.

CAPRICORN

What you want: Perfection. Loyalty. A mystery. A romance that doesn’t get in the way of work. Someone like-minded and intelligent.

What you need: Someone to help you see the best side of things. Imagination and youth. Loyalty and respect. Someone who’s okay with being dominated, but not a pushover.

AQUARIUS

What you want: A mad scientist. A genius. A poet. Someone to share your interests with. A best friend. Freedom.

What you need: Independence. Trust. Consistent communication. A best friend. A kind of intelligence you don’t have.

PISCES

What you want: A fairy-tale romance. A tortured artist. Someone you want to “fix”, someone you view as “the underdog”. Someone who’s sensitive, artistic, and poetic. Someone who dazzles you.

The Purple-Red Scale measures attraction in two dimensions: who you’re attracted to and how you’re attracted to them. It is designed to replace the Kinsey Scale, created to simplify human sexuality while still allowing for complexity. Plus, I love the idea of going up to a hetero and telling them I’m a Level C5 Gay.

I am risking nothing

I AM SORRY FOLLOWERS, I LOVE MY MOMMY

Will not risk.

Just a little reminder of what’s to come this year. ;D

Happy New Year!