Babie

It feels… wrong to be back in the outfit for the MV. The material that was soft during fittings now feels scratchy, and even though you refuse to change the torn shirt because continuity matters more to you than your fears, you can’t wait for the moment you’re allowed to get out of it. You spend every second when you’re not in front of the camera, covered in a big puffer jacket, and not just because the platform is freezing.  

The photographer this time is a woman. You don’t know if that’s by design or sheer coincidence, but it goes a long way to get you less tense. The fact that not one of the guys leaves when it’s your shoot, also helps a lot. They’re not crowding you or making you feel like they’re “checking your work”. Their presence is just a simple reminder that they remember what happened, and they won’t let you experience that again.  

What was supposed to be a group, pair, and solo shoot, has ended up being only a pair and solo shoot, after it became clear that someone other than Kwan had taken pictures of the whole group with the scarecrow in Thailand, and Hongjoong had asked how you felt about maybe using that for the group picture.  

While you do feel a certain way about it, even if Kwan hadn’t been the one to snap this particular picture, you’d been unable to deny just how sick it looked and had ultimately agreed to use it. It wasn’t that big of a deal. If they’d used your single shots, you would have said something, but you don’t think you could live with yourself if Atiny never got to experience the epicness of the group picture, so what’s the harm? 

Your paired shoot is with Jongho, the two youngest members that you are, and he makes sure to ask you for permission every time a pose requires him to touch you. You suppose it could be seen as overkill, but you’re secretly grateful for the care he takes with you, and how patient the photographer is.

No one says anything about you seeming a bit on edge, the ones whose opinions you care the most about, know why you’re being off, and are beyond accommodating the whole way through, which actually makes you feel a bit special.  

By the time you reach “the surface” again after the shoot is done, you’re all freezing and tired, and in massive need of food and rest. Jet-lag has been a bitch to all of you, and almost everyone falls asleep in the van on the way home.  

You stay awake, and on your phone, though, texting flight suggestions to Chris to see which ones would be the best for his schedule. He very kindly reminds you that he’s a teacher and therefore on winter break, which means he’ll accommodate you regardless of what time you arrive at the airport.

You’ve already started packing in your mind, thinking of all the snacks you need to check that you’re allowed to bring back into Australia, coming up with the best place to put the Thailand souvenirs in your luggage, what to put in your carry-on etc. You’re so excited about going home that you almost forget how tired you are, but you’re sure your body will remind you the first chance it gets.

In the end you settle on the day after tomorrow for your flight, giving you time to pack and prepare yourself mentally for what is going to be a 10-hour flight.  

You’re pretty nervous about getting on a plane by yourself for the first time in two years and being without a pack of virtual sheep dogs to herd you. But you know you’ll be able to do it. You’ve stood on stage in front of hundreds of thousands of people when you were at your most vulnerable. A little plane ride is nothing you won’t be able to pull off.  

Especially not when the reward at the end of it will be a hug from your big brother.  

“You cannot be fucking serious!”  

Hongjoong had expected you to react unfavorably but not by practically yelling at him.

“Does it help if it was the director’s decision?” He asks with a sigh, wondering why he’s the one having to break this news to you. Where was Minseok when he needed him? Probably at home packing.  

“Not at all! You should have told him it was a terribly decision.” You’re gawking at him like he’s lost his mind, and no matter how many times he tells you he’s just the messenger, he’s the only one around to catch what he’s just now discovering is your temper.  

“Look, Minseok-ssi accepted it.”  

“I don’t care, you should have told him not to! They almost just lost their baby, and you want to send him away from his family to babysit me in Sydney for a week?”  

Hongjoong sighs again, the beginnings of a headache starting to make itself known in his temples.  

“They’re all going, Chan-ah. The whole family. His wife agreed.”  

“There’s no way.” You’re out of your seat, pacing the length of the living room while the captain watches from the safety of his armchair. “Seonyoung-unnie needs peace and quiet, not the stress of international travel.”

“According to Minseok-ssi, his wife didn’t exactly consider a vacation someplace warm a burden. Especially one paid for by the company.”

“The company or you?”  

Hongjoong looks at you for a moment before the heat starts showing on his face.  

“He’s paid for by the company. The others travel for free through someone else.”  

“Why are you doing this? Going into debt for my sake wasn’t enough, now you’re sending families on vacation too?”  

“It’s going to take a whole lot more than this to put me into debt, Chan-ah.” He chuckles, like the notion is such a ridiculous one, it’s amusing to him. “And given everything that’s happened, neither the director, myself, or Minseok feel comfortable having you alone for that long.”  

“I’m not going to get kidnapped, captain.” You actually roll your eyes at him, and while he knows he’d be annoyed if any of the others did it, with you he just feels proud.  

“You don’t know that. You’ve been made aware of the letters, haven’t you? Do you really think the company would be comfortable sending you to another country without any sort of protection?”  

You’ve seen the letters, as much as you’ve tried to convince yourself that they’re harmless and sent by someone with far too much free-time and lack of actual hobbies in their life. But you have seen them, even if they were kept from you at the beginning when they started showing up at the company.

They were regular fan-letters at first, maybe slightly more intense than the normal ones, but still nothing to worry about. Then they got more personal, started adding details very few people would know about you. Pictures of you the one time you snuck out to go on a date with another idol, even though the sender promised they’d never show them to anyone else because they knew you knew it was a mistake.  

They’ve become more unhinged since then, but even though you’re worried about them, there’s been so much other shit going on in your life that you haven’t had the time nor the energy to pay it much attention.

One of the good things about having Yi as your way too controlling babysitter had been that she never let you go anywhere by yourself, which had meant that even though you hated her, if you’d been attacked, at least you wouldn’t have been alone.  

You know Hongjoong is right. You understand that given the circumstances of everything happening, including the stalker, the company won’t take the risk of letting you go alone. You probably wouldn’t have minded it all that much. But they’ve chosen to bring Minseok into this, not to mention his family, and you’re not okay with them suffering because of you.  

“I understand that you don’t like it.” Hongjoong sighs, leaning his elbows on his knees as he watches you slow your pacing until you stop in the middle of the room. “If it was possible, I would have asked to let you go alone. But right now, it’s not.”  

“I have to talk to Chris.” You mumble, as if lost in your thoughts, and Hongjoong is just a shadow in the room.  

“I’m sure he won’t mind if you explain it to him.”

“No, I mean so he can clean up the house.” You meet his eye with a look of disbelief on your face. “He’s never going to let them stay at a hotel once he finds out the kids are coming too.”  

“I’d pay for it.”  

So much for ‘paid through someone else’.  

“You can keep it as a back-up, but the house is big enough for everyone, and once my brother figures out Seonyoung-unnie is pregnant, he won’t really give them a choice. At least after the first night.”

“I’ll let Minseok know but just know that you don’t have to have them around 24/7.”  

“I thought that was the point of a babysitter?” You scoff and Hongjoong can’t really tell if you’re annoyed or if you’ve just made a joke.  

“They’re not babysitting, just… Keeping an eye out.”  

“Right. Like a babysitter.”  

“I’m not going to convince you it’s anything else, am I?”  

“Nope. They’re officially the most expensive babysitters you’ll ever hire for anything.” You say, an almost bratty smile pulling at your lips, and he’s so excited to see it, he’ll happily ignore the attitude.  

“Go call your brother, and I’ll let Minseok and his wife know. And finish packing your bags, there were literally no clothes when I walked by earlier.”  

“My brother deserves snacks, thank you very much.”  

“Unnie…” Hyemin’s small hand slips into yours and you lean down to hear her better even though the airport is pretty calm at this time of night, shifting your mask to make sure it stays put in case somebody's watching.

“What is it, Min-ah?” You ask with a squeeze of her hand. “You okay?”  

“I’m a bit scared.” She mumbles, glancing around the lounge at all the other passengers. “And everyone seems so calm. They’ll know it’s my first time and I’m sure they’ll laugh at me.”  

“Oh, sweetie, it’s okay.” You say, nodding at Minseok to tell him you’ve got it when he catches your eye as he does his best to rein in his son. “When I got on a plane the first  time, I was really scared too. I was even older than you, and no one laughed at me when I told them I’d never traveled before.”  

“Really?” Hyemin’s eyes are like saucers, and you have to stop yourself from pulling her into a hug, staying on track.  

“Really. In fact, if you tell the flight attendants it’s your first time, they’ll be even nicer to you.”  

“No way!”  

“Yes way.” You giggle, giving her hand another squeeze. “The only scary part for me my first time was that when the plane goes up really fast, my ears felt kind of wonky and even hurt a little. But a very sweet lady next to me told me to chew gum and it helped.”  

“But I don’t have any gum.” Hyemin looks a little anxious and your heart gives a gentle squeeze.  

“I brought enough for all of us so you can have some of mine.” You chuckle as you pet the top of her head. “There’s also a little trick I learned that helps if you want me to teach you.”  

“Yes, please!”  

“Okay, so you need to pinch your nose…”  

Minseok takes a moment to watch you once he’s finally caught Jiho and put him in air jail like the little animal that he is.  

No matter how many times he sees you with his daughter, he can’t get over the feeling that the two of you are practically sisters. You’re so good with her, so warm and patient, and Hyemin truly looks at you like you hung the moon and the stars.  

When Hongjoong had asked him if he’d be willing to accompany you home over Christmas, he’d felt torn between his duties as your manager, and as a husband and father to his children. When the offer had extended to include them however, and Seonyoung had threatened to take the kids and go without him if he said no, he’d felt a huge weight fall off his shoulders.  

The guilt he feels over Thailand hasn’t faded in the slightest. And even though he knows he wasn’t technically allowed to tell his wife, you’re practically her little sister at this point, so he’d told her the broad strokes without any details that could get him in trouble with the company. He would have been insane to think she’d let you go home alone after that.  

“Let me guess,” Seonyoung chuckles as she comes up behind him after having visited the restroom. “He tried to make a break for it?”  

“As soon as you left.” Minseok sighs the fondest sigh as he leans down to kiss the love of his life. “I don’t know how you manage to do it.”  

“It’s like I told you the first time we met: I’m magical.” She giggles, before leaning over to kiss her son’s cheek, who instantly calmed down once she made an appearance again. “How are the girls doing?”  

He follows her gaze over to where you and Hyemin have started playing a game on your phone, even though he knows your battery will be dead before you board because of it.  

“I think Chan-ah taught her how to equalize.” He says, daring to take a chance as he puts Jiho down again, and fondly grumbles something about momma’s boy when the four-year-old stays put like a little angel.

“That’s sweet of her.” Seonyoung says as she leans down to take Jiho’s hand. “Jiho-ya, what do you say we go and see if there are any planes taking off?”  

Minseok watches the two of them head towards the massive panorama windows, before he takes all the hand luggage and goes over to you and Hyemin.  

“How are my girls doing?” He asks before he can even consider his words, and he watches your eyes widen while Hyemin just grins and hurries over to sit on his lap when he sits down.  

“Channie-unnie just taught me how to make my ears not hurt in the air! Oh, and she gave me gum too, and she said if I tell the flight attendants I’ve never flown before, they have to be super nice to me.” She rambles happily, her mouth moving at the speed of Wooyoung, and you can’t help but smile at how adorable father and daughter look together.

“That was really nice of her, princess. Did you make sure to thank her for her help?”  

“Of course I did, dad. I’m not a baby.” Hyemin pouts even though you can clearly see a smile peeking through.  

“Of course,” Minseok chuckles as he kisses her head and rubs her back. “I keep forgetting you’re a big girl now.”  

“And soon a two-times big sister too.” You chuckle as you plug your phone into the power bank, hoping to get some juice into it before you board the flight.  

“What do you think it’s going to be, unnie?” Hyemin whips around on her father’s lap, almost knocking her head into the man’s face with her speed. “I think it’s going to be another boy.”  

“Really?” You say, making a show of thinking it over to make her giggle. “I think it’s going to be a girl. Then, you’d get to be both a noona and an unnie. Wouldn’t that be cool?”  

“Hm…” The almost nine-year-old ponders your words, indeed taking the whole thing very seriously, and you have to once again stop yourself from letting the cuteness aggression take over. “I guess that could be kind of fun. I would have someone to play princesses with.”  

“Hey, I thought you and your dad looked great as Elsa and Anna for Halloween.” You can’t help but giggle, watching your managers face go bright red.  

“I told Seonyoung not to send those pictures to you.” He grumbles and even though he’s a little embarrassed, hearing your first proper laugh in a while, makes the hour it took him to squeeze into the Anna-costume a couple of months ago more than worth it.  

“She’d never deny me that.” You laugh as you lean back in your seat and check the time. Almost time to board.  

“Unnie, where will you be sitting?” Hyemin asks, pulling you from your thoughts and you watch her holding her boarding pass, with the aid of her dad so she doesn’t lose it by accident.  

“Oh, I haven’t looked. Want to help me check?” You ask, reaching her your own boarding pass and chuckling when Minseok looks beyond stressed that his child is now holding two very important travel documents in her little hands.  

She stares at the numbers and letters, her little face scrunched up in concentration before she looks between you and her dad.  

“Help me?” She asks, and you and Minseok almost die from the cuteness, but you manage to pull yourself together to sit next to her and help her hold onto the boarding passes.  

“Okay, so these are the seat numbers right here.” You say, pointing at it. “Now, the number tells you what row we’re in, and the letter is which seat we’re going to sit in. So, yours says you’re in 8G, and mine says 8J, so we should be almost right next to each other.”

“We’re sitting together?” Hyemin looks so excited that you feel bad when Minseok tells her they’ve planned it so that her and her brother are sitting next to their parents during the flight since it’s their first time on a plane.  

“But I’ll be right there with you the whole time, even while we’re asleep. It’ll be almost like a little sleepover.”  

“Mm, I like that.” She decides, and just like that, any hurt feelings about not getting to sit right next to you are gone with the wind.  

You decide to use the bathroom one last time while Minseok and Seonyoung get the kids ready for “bed”, brushing their teeth and dressing them in their pajamas and hoodies to make sure they stay warm up in the air.  

You honestly kind of wish it was acceptable for you to board a plane in your pajamas as well, but then again, you basically are, given that you’re wearing what you typically would for dance practices: sweatpants, t-shirt, oversized hoodie and sneakers. The only difference is the thick socks you’re wearing to keep your feet warm during the flight, whereas you typically favor the thinner ones for practice.  

You hold Hyemin’s hand when you walk out of the bathrooms, and you can feel her buzzing with energy and nerves when the call for business class to board comes through the Tannoy.  

You look to Seonyoung to see if she wants you to give her daughter to her so they can walk through the gate together, but the older woman just shakes her head and gestures for you to go. You make your way up to the gate as a group however so it’s clear you haven’t just kidnapped a random child you’re not even related to, and they let all of you through without any issues.  

Hyemin is uncharacteristically quiet as you make your way down the jet bridge, and you squeeze her hand to let her know you’ve got her.  

The flight attendants smile and give her a little wave when you board, and you’re so proud of her when she gathers all her courage to speak to them.  

“It’s… It’s me and my brother’s first time on an airplane.” She says softly, her cheeks going bright pink as she so bravely looks at the closest attendant.  

“Oh, really? That’s so exciting.” She smiles, softly clapping her hands together in the outmost elegant way. “The crew is going to do our very best to make sure you and your brother have an amazing first flight.”  

“Thank you.” Hyemin says with a wide, toothy grin, and you can tell she’s already managed to charm the attendant and her colleague. “We’re looking forward to it.”  

You thank the two women as well, before you lead Hyemin to the front of the plane and help her into her seat. Of course, both her and Jiho are trying their best to look at everything all at once, and once they’re in their seats, they have the best time tapping the screens, opening up the compartments, checking to see how the dividers work. They’re basically doing everything you had wanted to do the first time you got on a plane to go to Korea, but was too nervous to, and it’s bringing a nice, warm feeling into your heart to see the two of them having the courage to do what you hadn’t.  

Of course, because you have a window seat, the kids spend almost none of the time before take-off in their seats after they’ve looked at everything there, and instead both crawl up on your lap to watch the blinking lights and the ground crew as they finish up their work.  

Their parents actually have to bribe them with a movie and a snack before they sleep, to get them back in their seats in time for the safety briefing, and Hyemin keeps looking over at you through the entire thing, as if she’s checking to see that you’re following along too.  

Even though the seats are slightly stacked, you’re able to see her a little bit as the plane starts moving. She’s sitting ramrod straight in her seat, one hand clutching Minseok’s and the other gripping the armrest until her little knuckles are white.  

You want so badly to comfort her but know that her dad has everything handled, and you force yourself to relax as you pop a piece of gum into your mouth. You fidget with the packet it as the plane climbs higher, wanting to have it ready in case the family needs it, but Seonyoung had of course already planned for it with a chewy snack that Jiho could also eat. You hadn’t even thought about the fact that giving a four-year-old gum might have not been the best idea you’ve ever had, and that giving it only to Hyemin would have almost surely made her little brother start crying.  

So, you lean back in your seat, look out the window and try to put all thoughts about everything that isn’t Australia, aside. You’re finally on your way home, and ten hours have never felt so long.  

The adrenaline of take-off lasts about half-way through Minions: The Rise of Gru before the kids conk out. And although there are still people awake in the cabin, the energy has shifted into the kind of heavy calm that you’ve only experienced on overnight flights.  

People have been taking turns in the bathrooms, getting themselves ready for sleep. You yourself have been up to brush your teeth and are currently snuggled up under a duvet, chatting with Chris before he goes to bed.  

Little Fucker 21:13  

“Is your insomnia still kicking your ass?” You send, silently giggling to yourself at the indignant emojis your older brother sends back.  

Grandpa Bro 21:14  

I’ll have you know I beat that son of a bitch last year. No one’s kicking my ass anymore  

Little Fucker 21:14  

Except Felix  

Grandpa Bro 21:15  

Hey, just because he’s a slippery little thing doesn’t mean I’m still not stronger than him!  

Little Fucker 21:15  

Yeah yeah, good to know he’s still running circles around you  

Grandpa Bro 21:15  

You’re lucky I’ve missed you or I’d make you eat those words  

Little Fucker 21:16  

Mhm I’m so scaaaared 

You should sleep though 

Don’t need you waking up late and ruining my arrival back to my home country  

Grandpa Bro 21:18  

You know, you could just say you’re worried about me driving while sleep-deprived  

The words give you pause, and your lack of reply definitely gets to him because he quickly sends you another message.  

Grandpa Bro 21:20  

I promise I’ll be careful on the road. You don’t have to worry about me. I’ll be there.  

You don’t know if you can blame the altitude for the way tears gather in your eyes, but you’re going to anyway, and you keep your sniffling quiet so Minseok or Seonyoung won’t hear if they’re still awake.  

Little Fucker 21:22  

“You better” You send back, the need to be his arms stronger than you’ve felt it in years. “If not, I’ll haunt you”  

Grandpa Bro 21:23  

I’m pretty sure it would be the opposite  

Little Fucker 21:23  

No. I’d be the first human to haunt a ghost. You just watch me.  

Grandpa Bro 21:24  

I think I’m good on that for at least like 60 years 

After that you’re free to haunt me as much as you want 

Now try to get some sleep and I’ll see you in the morning 

Promise I’ll text you when I’m at arrivals 

Night  

Little Fucker 21:26  

Make it 100 years and you’ve got a deal 

Sounds good  

Little Fucker 21:28  

I can’t wait 

G’night Chris  

You wake up a couple of hours later to the feeling of someone watching you, and you jolt before the little face staring at you clicks in your mind.

“Jiho-ya.” You mumble as you pull your headphones off, rubbing the sleep out of your eyes as you vaguely wonder when you lowered the divider during the night. “Are you okay?”  

“Mhm.” The four-year-old nods, looking like he’s been awake for an hour already. “I’m bored.”

“Mm, is your mom awake?”  

“No, they’re all asleep. Can I sit with you?”  

You’ve never been able to say no to either of the Lee-children and you’re not about to start now, so even though you’re still half-asleep, you nod and help him climb up onto your lap.  

He settles like a perfect angel, and you wrap an arm around him as you adjust your seat and fold out the little table for him to put his coloring book and crayons on. He hums as you color a picture of a circus together, and he actually listens when you tell him he has to be a little quieter so the other passengers can keep sleeping.  

The longer he sits with you though, the more you start to worry about Seonyoung waking up to her youngest gone. The last thing you want to do is cause her more stress, especially with the week she’s had, so with Jiho’s permission, you tear out an empty page from the back of the coloring book and write her a message.  

Jiho is more than happy to be your errand boy, and he quietly and stealthily sneaks over to his mom’s seat and places the page where he’d slept, so it’s the first thing she’ll see when she wakes up. And with that mission accomplished, he proudly returns to you.  

The coloring book only holds his attention for so long though, and soon enough he’s bored again and needs to use the bathroom. You consider waking up one of his parents, but they’ve trusted you to look after him before so in the end you decide to take him to the bathroom yourself. Thankfully he only needs to pee, and he’s able to do that unassisted, but you’re still on stand-by outside the door should he need you.  

Once he’s done, and you’ve helped him wash his hands thoroughly, you take him back to your seat where he once again settles on your lap like the cutest little koala.  

You might actually have to get him a koala onesie as a souvenir before you all leave. 

You let him have your complimentary headphones and start up the Minions-movie on your screen so he can continue where he left off last night. He doesn’t so much watch it though, as he fades in and out of sleep, still tired but not enough to fully commit to sleeping, and with a secure grip on him, you do the same. You raise the divider a little bit so that if he moves, he won’t fall into the aisle, but his parents can still see him when they wake up.  

The next time you wake up is when breakfast is about to be served. Hyemin seems to have been awake for a little bit, and even if they exactly don’t look well-rested, then again, who does when they’re sleeping on a plane, Minseok and Seonyoung are up and getting ready for breakfast. And once they see you’re awake, Minseok comes to collect his son with a grateful thank you for entertaining him while they got a couple more hours of sleep.  

Breakfast service is a fairly calm affair overall, even if you can see Minseok occasionally looking over at you to see if you’re eating, which is fair because you’re finding it more difficult than usual. Maybe it’s because you know breakfast means touching down in Sydney within the next hour and a half, and you’ll see your brother in the flesh for the first time in two years. Which would be all fine and good if it wasn’t for the fact that he will also be seeing you in the flesh, and you look very different from what he’s used to.  

You’ve brought some makeup in case you need it, but it’s all in the bag stowed away in the cargo hold, and you haven’t worn any for the flight. He’s seen your pictures and videos, but the makeup unnies have become experts at hiding just how badly the weight loss has affected you, so the curated image of Chan of Ateez is very different from the little sister he’s going to be meeting soon. Frankly it’s making you sick to your stomach, and you're only able to force yourself to finish half a pancake and most of the strawberries before you’re at your limit.  

Grandpa Bro 07:24  

Morning kiddo! Just wanted to inform you that I am in fact up, showered and fed  

Little Fucker 07:28  

Good job on caring for yourself, I’m very proud 

I’ll give you a gold star when we land  

Grandpa Bro 07:30  

You should be proud you little shit! I kept tossing and turning worried I’d miss my alarm 

And I will take that gold star  

Little Fucker 07:30  

You’re a child 

(Sorry you didn’t sleep well <3)  

Grandpa Bro 07:31  

I’d rather be a child than an old man 

(It’s okay, I’m just excited to see you <3)  

Little Fucker 07:32  

God the kids are gonna love you! 

(Drive safe okay?) 

Grandpa Bro 07:32  

I’m counting on it! 

(I always do) 

Love you!  

Little Fucker 07:33  

I love you too  

Minseok and Seonyoung take turns getting the kids dressed and their teeth brushed before the announcement comes that it’s time for landing, and even though the kids seem nervous as they’re helped with their seatbelts, it’s nowhere near the nerves they had for takeoff. In fact, you’re pretty sure you’re more nervous than they are.  

The landing is smooth, but you barely notice over the anxiety now firmly lodged in the pit of your stomach that refuses to let go even once you’re stationary on the ground.  

You gather your things in a daze. You don’t even notice the way Minseok and Seonyoung corral the kids, trying to keep their excitement from overwhelming you too much. Nor are you aware of how Seonyoung and Jiho stay ahead of you as you leave the plane, while Minseok and Hyemin follow, making sure you don’t fall behind or wander off. Anyone else would have been annoyed at the idea of needing to be looked after like a kindergartener on a field trip, but it’s what’s needed.  

The anxiety daze lessens slightly as you make your way through customs, declaring all the snacks a certain someone had helped you buy back in Korea, before you’re cleared to officially enter the country.  

Chris had texted you while you were at the baggage carousel, saying he was at the airport safe and sound, and waiting for you in the arrivals hall, and it had taken actual effort to let the customs agents do their job and not just run out of there to find him.  

You almost don’t recognize him at first. The last time you saw a picture of him he’d had his natural dark, curly hair, but the man grinning and flashing a DIY sign saying WELCOME HOME ANKLEBITER! is bleach blond with his hair cut short.  

He looks so… manly.  

Something touches your hand and you glance over at Minseok who’s gently taking your suitcase from you with a nod. It’s all the permission you need.  

You sprint across the hall, narrowly avoiding other travelers in your hurry, slamming the air out of your lungs when you finally make contact with Chris. Loud, ugly sobs are wrenched out of you when he wraps his arms around your waist and rocks you like he’s done your whole life.  

So much has changed and yet nothing at all. His muscles are bigger but he still knows the exact pressure that hits your soul perfectly. His body wash is different and yet he still somehow smells like himself. He’s trying to hold back his own tears, but he’s still as big of a crybaby as you.

“Welcome home, kiddo.” He sobs into your shoulder, and you cry harder, the sound of his voice, untouched by shitty phone speakers and microphones, so much better and warmer than you remember it.  

You don’t have any words to say back. Nothing can possibly convey the things you feel in this moment, but you squeeze him tighter and sob louder, hoping that will make your feelings clear enough.  

“Noona, why are you sad?”  

Jiho’s voice brings you out of the moment, and you chuckle as you pull back to the sound of Seonyoung explaining the concept of happy tears.

Chris grins as he gets a proper look at you, even if you force yourself to ignore the flash of sadness in his eyes when your physical state truly hits him. He’s quick to cover it though, and he keeps you safely tucked into his side as he reaches out to introduce himself, his Korean slightly choppy from him being out of practice but good enough that you don’t have to gather enough braincells to translate anything.  

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, I’m Chris.” He says, his accent making you smile as he shakes Seonyoung’s hand first, immediately scoring points from your manager.  

“My name’s Seonyoung, it’s very nice to finally meet Chan-ah’s beloved brother.” She says, and you try your best impression of a scoff when Chris shoots you a teasing eyebrow, even though you fail miserably when you’re still hiccupping from the sobs.  

“She came up with that, I never said you were beloved.”  

“Right, sure.” He laughs, giving you a squeeze before he reaches for Minseok, giving him a proper bow. “Thank you for taking care of my sister all this time, sir.”  

“Alright, that’s enough!” You rush, smacking his arm when your manager blushes and that sorrowful regret lingers in his eyes again. “Don’t embarrass me the first thing you do.”  

“Kept up with the boxing, did you?” Chris laughs before he loosens his hold on you slightly and crouches down so he isn’t towering over the kids. “Hi, my name’s Chris. I’m Chan’s older brother. What are your names?”

Jiho is half hiding behind his mom, but Hyemin can’t stop staring at Chris as he smiles encouragingly at her.  

Great, another child lost to the charm of your brother.  

“My name is Hyemin, I’m almost nine. That’s my brother Jiho.”  

“I’m four.” Jiho pipes up, still a bit nervous but seeming to trust his older sister’s instincts about this new man.  

“Wow, almost nine, and four? Those are some good ages to be.” Chris grins excitedly, and try as you may to act annoyed, it’s always been impossible not to smile when you see your brother around kids. “Thank you for looking after my little sister on the flight, she gets a little nervous on planes so I’m glad you guys were there to help her out.”  

And just like that he has won the whole family over. You can only imagine how popular he must be at his school. With children, parents and staff alike. 

“Alright, so I have the van parked outside, but does anyone need a bathroom break or something to eat or drink before we head out?”  

Yeah, you definitely feel like a kid on a school field-trip now.  

A couple of quick trips to the bathrooms later, you’re off.  

Upon seeing an actual van out in the parking lot, you question him about where he managed to steal it, only for him to hurriedly correct you that it’s the school’s swim team’s van, and he’d gotten permission to borrow it. You get the distinct feeling that he’s quite nervous about not making a bad impression on the family, and especially Minseok, which of course is going to make it all the more fun to tease him. 

Chapter 15 Chapter 17

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