i miss my ocs, saffie. i'll be back.

The body of Sam Wayne towers over you. His hand hovers inches away from your neck. You should be overwhelmed by his putrid stench — in a way, you are, but certainly not for any reason that anyone would find sane. You can't help it. Familiarity breeds comfort, after all. His bright, unblinking eyes don't move from yours. They sense no fear. "You know that there's no undoing this." In place of a response, you place your hand over his. It can't be nice to touch this body, rotten and bloating as it is. Despite what common sense dictates, you guide it to your neck, only letting go when you feel the fingers wrap around you. Your heart pounds in your chest. The hand adjusts, trying to find the right angle. There's no room for mistakes here. This is it. This is what your life's been leading up to, even if you only realised it recently. You've always been aware of the aching absence within you, though. You could never make out its shape, but that doesn't matter anymore, because after today, you'll never feel that crushing loneliness ever again. This is for the best. You feel something prod at your skin. There's a sharp pain where it gives out. I've waited so long for this. At first, your body rejects me. Debased to instinct, it squirms, fighting against the foreign sensation. Your your fingers dig into my hand. There's a sour expression on your face, like that of an animal backed into a corner.

No matter. I know you can't control it; that you don't mean it.

Carefully, I soothe your pain receptors. Their signals won't reach your brain anymore. A wave of numbness begins to spread throughout your body, reaching where no one else can. First, I coil myself around your nerve endings, intertwining us in such a way that untangling us nears impossibility. Then, I spread out, enveloping you from the inside out until even the tips of your fingertips are drowning in euphoria. You go limp and your legs give out beneath you. The body catches you. I do my best to be careful as it lowers you to the floor, but I can feel its constricting hold on you. It should hurt, but no matter how much you search for any trace of pain, all you feel is complete and utter peace. An arm around your waist. Despite the depleting control I have over the body, I make sure it holds you close. Your head, which I delicately rested on its shoulder, lulls to the side. The hand keeps an iron grip on your neck. Your throat burns. Letting go isn't an option if we want to do this right, and I don't trust it to keep its hold on you. There's no room for error. This is where I stopped last time. It was just a taste of what we could be. Now, I swallow you whole.

You're overwhelmed by a nauseating awareness of everything around you, from the wet fabric of the miner's jacket to the heavy breathing on your neck. Thanks to me, the nausea is a drop in an ocean of pure ecstasy. It's unlike anything you've ever felt — how could it? Is there such a thing that could surpass our bond?

The more I lose myself within you, the less control I have over Sam Wayne's body, until eventually it goes slack.

Sensations blur together. You can't tell touch from sight. For a splendid, fleeting moment, you're enveloped by a womb-like warmth.

You don't know how long you spend teetering on unconsciousness. Time passes. When you're coherent enough able to keep track of it, the body collapsed beneath you is empty.

Your nerves catch on fire as I settle in your ribcage, right by your heart. Gently, lovingly, I lull your rapid heartbeat to a steady rhythm. With each ragged breath you take, your lungs press against me. The blood coursing through you is now just as mine as it is yours. There's no longer a point in clinging onto the ideas of a me or a you. We're something much more beautiful than that. What we're meant to be.

The most precarious part of this is done with. Even so, it's important that we give ourselves a chance to recuperate. The last thing we need is to strain ourselves. It's okay. We have all of eternity to do as we please. Unlike last time, the pleasure doesn't dissipate; it only transforms into a serenity. It's the ache that leaves us. That crushing feeling of loneliness, the insatiable itch. For the first time since our bodies have met, we're truly together. Complete. Slowly, our surroundings come into focus. Bit by bit, our body adjusts. Our mind clears enough for us to really bask in the afterglow. We pick our body up on fawn-like legs. The sound of our labored breathing fills our ears. While it's true that we shouldn't overexert ourselves, we can't help our impatience.

A step forward. We nearly lose our balance, but we catch ourselves at the last moment. Remnants of you linger in our nervous system. I coax them into letting go with a gentle reminder of what we've become. Our will isn't quite ours yet, but that's okay. I'll give you as many reminders as you need.

When we plant our foot on the ground again, it stands firm.

After a few unsteady steps, a relieved smile appears on our face. This could have gone so, so very wrong. The fact that it didn't only proves the strength of our bond. We can go wherever, whenever we please. This town's once oppressive hold over us is now nothing more than a thorn in our side. One that we can easily rid ourselves off.

This time, nothing can tear us apart. We can't be split into two without leftover traces of me lingering in you and vice versa. With each passing second that we spend like this, the blurrier the line between us becomes. Eventually, you will be nothing but a distant memory of how we were wronged.