Spillsy McDropsalot

Just came home from a dinner party with the friendgroup at which several people kept saying "Ask Pedro" or "Pedro will know" and I was terrified that they were referring to an AI like Claude but no, thank fuck, they were referring to a cardboard cutout of Pedro Pascal that someone left upstairs and who has been designated a kind of patron saint status in the household.

You sigh, looking into your blue orbs in the mirror before throwing your messy hair into a bun and heading downstairs in your skinny jeans and converse. Your mom sits at the table smoking a forbidden plastic cigarette. "I've sold you for more money" she says. Suddenly there was a knock at the door. "Ello love" says the dangerous crow boy.

I love being on Tumblr and no other social media because it makes me think I know what the rest of the Internet is talking about when really I have no idea. I go into school today thinking "oh boy can't wait to talk to all my friends about the dangerous crow boy who's job it is to destroy plastic" and then everyone's talking about the rapture??? The fuck???

"average person has 3 microplastics in them" factoid actually just a statistical error. average person has 0 microplastics. Dangerous crow boy, who lives in a fae world & eats over 10,000 microplastics each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

i usually don't engage with booktok mockery because most of it is just elaborately feigning surprise that straight women can have kinks. but literally why the fuck is his job to destroy plastic

I’m on dangerous crow boy Tumblr now??

platonically shooting my friendshot hoping I don't get acquaintance-zoned

just did a really good job of cutting a bagel there's no weird thin or thick parts it's all even all over. this is huge for me

guys ur never gonna believe what 602 is doing right now