Mario, the idea vs. Mario, the man in the style of Disco Elysium
1. "I used to have a console just like this"
2. Say nothing, just play the game
3. [Rhetoric: Challenging] impress him with your gaming knowledge
+1 Dr. Mario commits medical malpractice
This is a White Check. You may retry it.
You lay awake and think about this all the time, you have this in the bag.
"We all know Mario is cool as fuck." You place your hands on your hips with great confidence.
"Horrible opening." his finger pauses the game by pressing a button on the controller.
ESPRIT DE CORPS [Medium: Success]
He is morbidly curious about where this is going
"But who knows what he's thinking? Who knows why he crushes turtles?" Your fist hits your palm to emphasize the point.
"To save the Princess? Also gross."
AUTHORITY [Easy: Success]
Right now, all of his attention is on you.
EMPATHY [Medium: Success]
Despite his feigned disgust, he is actually quite curious.
ESPRIT DE CORPS [Medium: Success]
He's never considered this before.
"And why do we think about him as fondly as the mythical (nonexistent?) Dr Pepper?"
You will never forgive Dr Pepper for what he did.
The lieutenant has no words. All that escapes his mouth is a helpless noise of confusion.
RHETORIC [Medium: Failure]
Now we hit him with the big whammy.
He exhales lightly through his nose.
EMPATHY [Medium: Failure]
It's unclear if this is out of humor or exasperation.
"You can't just say 'perchance', detective."
RHETORIC [Medium: Success]
Never say that. It undercuts your argument. Try using a quote from someone smarter than you.
ENCYCLOPEDIA [Medium: Success]
Immanuel Kant was an enlightenment era philosopher who made incredible contributions to metaphysics and ethics.
"It was Kant who said 'Experience without theory is blind, but theory without experience is mere intellectual play'."
Now loop that into your argument.
"Mario exhibits experience by crushing turts all day.."
He holds out a flat palm towards you, "stop."
ESPRIT DE CORPS [Medium: Success]
What he wants to say is, can we please just get back to playing?
AUTHORITY [Medium: Success]
You are enlightening him. He is lucky to be granted this forbidden knowledge. You have no reason to stop because he can't handle the truth.
He also hasn't heard your Mario impression yet, my liege.
"And he exhibits theory by stating 'lets-a go!' Keep it up, baby!"
His brow seems to be stuck in a confused furrow.
ESPRIT DE CORPS [Medium: Success]
The furrow intensifies upon you telling Mario to 'keep it up'.
"When Mario leaves his place of safety to stomp a turty,"
He has taken off his glasses and is currently massaging the bridge of his nose.
ESPRIT DE CORPS [Medium: Success]
He does not find Mario stepping on turtles as funny as you do.
Try getting profound, that'll reel him back in.
"He knows that he may Die. And yet, for a man who can purchase lives with money, a life becomes a mere store of value."
"Ok?" His voice is despondent.
ESPRIT DE CORPS [Medium: Success]
He just needs to wait it out and let you talk.
"A tax that can be paid for, much as a rich man feels any law with a fine is a price."
"We think of Mario as a hero, but he is simply a one percenter-"
"Why are we saying this?" He asks as he pushes his glasses back on.
"-Of a more privileged variety. The lifekind."
He is trying very hard to make sense of what you're saying "what?"
ENDURANCE [Easy: Success]
You're almost done with your rant. Dont let him knock you off course.
"Perchance." You triumphantly cross your arms over your chest, signifying the end of your final point.
The lieutenant sighs deeply and silently turns the console back on.
ESPRIT DE CORPS [Easy: Success]
You can't just say perchance.
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