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animated the "It's okay not to smile" scene from chapter 4

Tsunami warnings, advisories, and watches are in place across much of the Pacific Ocean (ranging from Alaska to Antarctica).

On that scale, a warning is the highest threat, then an advisory, then a watch.

Guillermo Del Toro on AI "art"

1. What is the Check the Facts Skill and What is it Used For?

Check the Facts is an Emotion Regulation Skill that is used to check out whether your emotional reaction to an event fits the facts of that event or situation.  This skill is especially useful when emotions are triggered by thoughts or by assumptions in response to a prompting situation. 

This process can help you to see the chain of escalation that often feeds your emotional response.  It’s rarely as simple as “Prompting Event –> Emotional Response” though that does sometimes happen.  The way a chain of events has escalated may be nuanced and may not be adequately captured by this Skill worksheet, or an event that seems small when written out was actually a serious cause of distress when you were (or may still be) experiencing it. 

This can be a double-edged sword because it can put prompting events into perspective (and show your reaction didn’t “fit the facts”) or it can understate the distress that an event caused you by ignoring the larger context, which can leave you feeling invalid.  That’s why it’s important to keep an open mind and a broad perspective when working through this skill.

If the emotion or emotional response does not fit the facts, this skill is used to identify your beliefs and assumptions that might be fueling the emotion further, so that you can adjust your interpretation of the event so that it actually fits the facts.  Once your interpretation fits the facts, you can then determine what to do about the emotion you are feeling, usually by following up with another Skill.

If your emotion/emotional response does fit the facts, the use of this skill can be validating and give you direction if you are unsure of how to proceed with further Skills. 

2. How to Check the Facts, Step-By-Step:

Ask yourself: What is the emotion that I want to change?

Ask yourself: What is the event prompting my emotion? Use the Mindfulness “What” Skills to help you do this. Describe the facts that you Observe through your senses and your internal experiences, not assumptions that you are making about the feelings of other people, because those are not things that you can observe.  Describe what happened/is happening in detail, trying to keep your description free of judgements. Basically you’re answering “Who, What, When, and Where” and, if you know, “Why” as well.  Explain the situation that is causing the emotion.  List it out, list what has actually happened that has prompted the emotion you’re “checking.”  It’s important that while doing this you challenge judgements, absolutes, and black-and-white descriptions by Describing and evaluating the situation/event Non-Judgmentally. Try to stick to the specific situation you’re checking the facts for, even though it helps to identity where the following thought patterns seem to comes from and how that larger or subconscious context appears or manifests in your emotional response.

Ask yourself: What are my interpretations, thoughts, and assumptions about the event? Think of other possible interpretations, practice looking at all sides of a situation and all points of view.  Test your interpretations and assumptions to see if they fit the facts.  Changing your interpretation by eliminating unwarranted assumptions can often result in the emotion itself lessening in intensity. Note: This does not mean “flipping” the interpretation above. Instead, try and stay objective and list other outcomes/interpretations that these facts could plausibly lead us to.

Ask yourself: Am I assuming a threat? Label the threat. Assess the probability that the threat is real.   Think of other ways you can interpret the situation so that you don’t feel threatened.  Using the Mindfulness Non-Judgmental Skill will help you figure out if you’re making an assumption about anything. It can help to ask yourself the questions: If the threat I’ve evaluated is real, is it really as bad as it is making me feel? Is there no solution or no way to make this better or to feel differently?

Ask yourself: What’s the catastrophe? I personally think the phrasing of this question is not the greatest, but you can re-frame this question to be: What is the worst-case scenario and how can I deal with it? Therefore you Cope Ahead (part of the ABC Skill, link coming soon) so that even if the “catastrophe” happens, you have a plan for how to deal with it.  This step boils down to two questions: 1) What are you most afraid of? and 2) What can you do about it?

Ask yourself: Does my emotion and/or its intensity fit the actual facts? Check out facts that fit each emotion (do you have reason to feel the way you do or is it because of assumptions in question 3?).

It’s important to note that sometimes we don’t have the words to describe what we’re feeling, thinking, or experiencing until we dig for them. Sometimes the word we want will not come.  That’s okay!  Especially in emotionally-charged situations we may struggle with expressing ourselves.  In that case, we have to try and describe the word we are looking for until we get a working understanding that would achieve the same result as using the original word that we have possibly forgotten.  It’s okay to not remember everything, in all contexts of this skill.

You just want to be able to articulate yourself and your feelings and experience in a way that you understand (or even better, if that description can shed some light on the nature of what you’re feeling or experiencing that you may not have noticed before).  If, for example, you say you feel “Bleh”, then try to describe what “Bleh” feels like.  That could help you identify what emotions are all wrapped up in that “Bleh” feeling. An emotion wheel can help you find words for your experience that might not immediately come to mind.

3. Different Methods for Checking the Facts:

I’ve written two posts displaying two similar yet different methods for Checking the Facts.  The first method, found here, follows the way the Skill is explained in the Manual, such as it is in this post.  However, this manner of Checking the Facts seems to be largely limited to short interactions, rather than ongoing situations that might be full of assumptions and interpretations that, without context, might look silly.  

That’s why I’m presenting an alternative method, found here that encourages you to write down the larger context of your prompting event, even stuff that was not directly an issue for you but became one indirectly, because all of those facts count towards creating the assumptions and interpretations that may otherwise seem invalid (as in, the emotional response was not warranted) if you hadn’t explained the context. Context is always important in all fields, not just psych.

4. Why Use Check the Facts? What do you do after using this skill?

While Checking the Facts on its own often results in a decrease in emotional intensity because now you know what’s exactly going on with external stimuli and with your own psychological state, more often it’s not enough to resolve any distressing emotion.  It also helps you determine whether your emotional response to a prompting event is warranted.  It can be a validating experience, or a corrective one.

Therefore, the goal of the Check the Facts Skill is to help you determine what Emotion Regulation Skill to use next–i.e. the Skill you need to use to address, resolve, or change the emotion in question.

After doing all these steps and you’ve determined whether your feelings “fit the facts”, that is, if the emotion you feel is warranted given the situation in your life that prompted it, under “Step 6: Does my emotion (or its intensity or duration) FIT THE FACTS?” you can ask yourself if there’s any room for change.  Is this an emotion that you just need to endure using Distress Tolerance Skills? Or can it be addressed by another Emotion Regulation Skill?

If the emotion doesn’t fit the facts or does fit the facts but the intensity or duration of the emotion does not, you would follow up the Check the Facts Skill by using the Opposite Action Skill (link coming soon). 

If an emotion fits the facts and so does its intensity and duration, then you would follow up by using the Problem Solving Skill (link coming soon).

If the emotion is too overwhelming in its intensity and/or duration, or there’s no way to solve the situation that’s prompting this emotion–whether or not the emotion fits the facts–you would follow up by using one or more Distress Tolerance Skills.

Also check whether you’re in Emotion Mind or in your Wise Mind in regards to these feelings. Sometimes, even when you Check the Facts, you might discover that what you have been feeling was/is actually reasonable. As I said in a previous post about this skill, it’s important to not use this skill to invalidate yourself right away (or at all), just as it is important to recognize problematic thought patterns and try to correct them with facts or reality.

Remember, don’t judge situations without having facts to back up those judgements, but if you DO have facts to back up your judgements, then your judgements are valid!  That might not be the case here, since I don’t believe anyone is worthless just because someone isn’t giving them attention, but that doesn’t mean your feeling isn’t valid, even if your judgement about yourself isn’t.

Also remember to keep an open mind to other possibilities when you’re practicing this Skill.  It’s very easy to become adamant about one interpretation or one possible outcome, but DBT is all about finding a middle path.  It’s important to acknowledge uncertainty, that you might not have all the facts you need to make a justifiable judgement or reasonable assumption, and that’s okay.  Not everything will have a clear cut “right or wrong” answer, and this Skill, fundamentally, is about determining what the most Effective course of action is for you.  A different person may come to an entirely different conclusion.

Further Reading: Intro to Emotion Regulation, Check the Facts Method 1, Check the Facts Method 2, Intro to Distress Tolerance Skills, Wise Mind, Emotion Mind, and Logic Mind, Mindfulness “What” Skills, Mindfulness “How” Skills, What is Reality Acknowledgement?, How to Practice Reality Acknowledgement

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