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Now that it is officially Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week, I want to talk about this!

I find that, as an aroace myself, I am constantly grasping at good representation and coming up empty— it usually ends up in one of two ways.

One: the character is portrayed as emotionless, cold, and robotic in nature. It’s the question aromantic and/or asexual people are often asked: “Are you heartless?” The answer is no, of course, but general media makes it out to be the opposite.

Or two: Their lack of attraction is seen as something to “fix” because they “haven’t found the right one yet”, and they end up with a partner as a “happy ending”.

It frustrates me greatly because of how little people actually see aromanticism or asexuality as a true part of the LGBTQIA+ community.

So when I watched Hazbin Hotel, and I found out about Alastor being aroace, I was over the moon. I was on cloud nine. I also saw how his voice actor has looked up the term as an attempt to learn about aroaces, which makes me OVERJOYED?? Amir is truly a blessing, and I love that he’s proud to embody a character that’s part of our community. It’s so beautiful to finally have a proper character, a fan favorite at that, who just so happens to be aroace— and that’s another thing I love about this.

It’s never explicitly stated in the show (though it is stated in interviews), but it’s rather clear when you’re watching, isn’t it? Alastor’s aversion to any sort of sexual advancement, coupled with Rosie’s blatant “I know you’re an ace in the hole” comment sort of spell out his asexuality pretty clearly, as well as what side of the spectrum he falls upon. In addition, his Valentine’s day card was strictly platonic, which caters to his aromantic side. It feels so validating to finally be represented, to finally have a character in media who shares the same lack of interest in romance and sex as I do.

When I entered the fandom to look for more content, I kind of expected to see the same respect for Alastor’s orientation there too. But that… wasn’t the case? I am fully aware that aromanticism and asexuality are both spectrums— of course, aromantic and/or asexual people can enter those kinds of relationships. I’m not denying that and they belong in the community as much as anyone else on the spectrum.

But, the more I see the same line again and again and again, the more it feels like an excuse to just ship what you want.

Usually I don’t mind shipping? I’m often a firm believer in people shipping what they like as long as it’s harmless and they don’t go crazy over it. I also know for a fact that Viv doesn’t have a problem with people shipping her characters. They are fictional, after all.

But in this case, people are ignoring the very thing that makes Alastor a part of the aroace community! People are ignoring his lack of romantic or sexual attraction!

Is this not the same as changing a gay character’s orientation to suit a straight ship? If not, how so? I’m told that we are a part of this community, so why aren’t we being treated like it? Why is it so hard to accept the people on the end of the spectrum who aren’t interested?

Something I’ve been noticing throughout my life is that society has not exactly progressed very much on the idea of accepting asexual or aromantic identities. Maybe we have, a little, since the old days— but hell, people in “the old days”, which in truth wasn’t very long ago, believed that asexuality was a medical condition to be “fixed” by taking the right medication or having sex. That’s a pretty low bar to clear. And on the romance side, you’re seen as a “late bloomer” or “boring” if you don’t express interest. These days, being friends with someone is treated like a gateway to them possibly becoming a lover. Not getting married, not going on dates, not wanting a partner— it’s all treated like a crime when it’s not.

Maybe I’m selfish, or sensitive, or I’m butthurt over nothing, or I’m making it all about me. Maybe I’m gatekeeping or whatever the term is. But please, please, please, I just want an aroace character like me who simply is not interested in sex or romance.

And I want fandom to respect that. I admire the creations that fans make— the art, the animatics, the writing and the character analysis. And I want people to keep creating because creation is indeed a beautiful thing.

But I really would like people to treat aroace identities like they’re important. Like it’s more than just a spectrum to get wiggle room to wrangle in another ship.

I’ve been thinking about this nonstop since the episode came out so I wanna point it out in a long rant about it.

There’s a leitmotif in mammon’s musical episode! To clarify, a leitmotif is a recurring tune associated with a particular character or idea. This one in particular is an excellent musical representation of Fizz’s character growth, and I’d like to explain why, because I’ve been obsessed with this and I tear up every time I hear this theme. IT MAKES ME WANT TO CRY

The leitmotif plays thrice in the episode. The first two are the same track, while the third is a variation of it.

The first time:

When Fizz is gushing about his passion and his dream to work with Mammon. There’s not much else going on, but Fizz is clearly in awe of his idol, as to be expected. He’s starstruck by the idea that he could have a chance to meet someone he admires so much. It’s a scene full of the wonder and excitement little Fizz encompasses.

And then the second:

When Fizz is communicating with the deaf fan! Oh god, oh god. I cried at this part, as I know a lot of people did too, because this part is so sweet and it’s so so important.

This is the reason Fizz kept doing his job. Because I think he realized that this fan looked up to him the same way Fizz did to Mammon. And, looking at him— the little guy has broken horns too. Just like Fizz.

Fizz sees himself in that kid.

Fizz has always wanted to put a smile on people’s faces, has always wanted to be the person kids look up to. And when he sees that happen, it’s probably what inspires him to keep going.

Now, what do these two instances have in common for the exact same track to play? I think that it’s a good emphasis on the kindness Fizz has when he’s a kid, and then, as an adult, the quieter gentleness underneath his stage persona.

Fizz is a kind person by nature, but the image that he has to maintain for Mammon’s brand is like— horniness and innuendos and sneering bravado cranked up to 11. So his audience never really sees the real side of him. The only time he gets to be more like himself is probably when a younger fan approaches him, which likely doesn’t happen a lot, considering the boatload of money you have to pay to even meet the performers, which I assume is added to what you’d have to scrape together to attend the event in the first place.

Another thing I noticed these two scenes have in common: The creepy fan’s appearance.

If you listen, Fizz’s leitmotif is overturned by an ominous shift in tone when the same obsessive fan shows up. I think it’s saying that even though there are undoubtedly positive experiences, they can very easily be overcome by the negative ones. Our brains are essentially hardwired to fixate on the negative experiences because of the possibility of the threat to safety. It wouldn’t be surprising if that’s what happened to Fizz.

Okay. Now, for the third and final time Fizz’s leitmotif plays:

Right after Fizz’s two minute notice. Right after he tells Mammon to go fuck himself.

This time, instead of the sweet and small melody with the subtle isolated instrumentation, it’s a fanfare. A full-force, fully orchestrated, trumpets blazing fanfare version of Fizz’s leitmotif. It’s kicking you right in the feels and it’s not hiding anymore.

It’s representing Fizz finally stepping into his own. Representing him standing up for himself. Representing his pride and his courage and him finally believing in his own self-worth.

And no one can tell me that it is pure coincidence that the music swells right at this moment.

Another beautiful thing is that the music is indeed cut off, just like the prior two scenes mentioned, but it’s by Fizz himself.

It happens when he finally announces what he’s been wanting to do after so many years of being manipulated, abused, and controlled. And for once, the decision he makes is all of his own accord.

And that’s because of the sheer amount of self-confidence and the courage he’s built throughout this entire episode.