#1 uranium fan

float like a butterfly (nervously forgets end of quote) green like a pea

one moment ☝️ *pauses the blowjob to start violently coughing up blood*

Keep salting the wound I'm close

Every version of you was necessary. Even the ones you’re ashamed of.

crush totally wasn't impressed by my miraculous flying machine fml

oh my god i just saw her get onto an airship with a woman whose tophat has at least twice as many sprockets as mine. i will be killing myself with an elaborate pneumatic pistol tonight

I love having mutuals and going yeah you WOULD reblog that one wouldnt you .

fellatio sounds like a supporting shakespeare character rather than oral sex on a penis to be honest

She’ll be screaming my gamertag

I was mugged by snow white and the seven dwarves the other day. six dwarves now, I suppose. kneed dipshit or dopey or whatever he was called in the eye socket so hard he died before his limp body hit the ground. they all scattered after that. I'll never forget how they wailed his name