welcome to the aquarium

[trying to instigate a fight between dollgirls so I can rob the place] that one said your joints are squeaky as fuck

Hitting a parry in sekiro feels like hitting her cervix

Hitting her cervix is exactly like when I hit a parry in sekiro

(Comes back from the evil sorceress’s tower covered in suspiciously placed bruises and poorly hidden hickeys) Uh Yeah Uhm she was torturing me Haha don’t worry abt it. By the way have you guys ever considered joining Her Dark Army

divorcebearing hips

divorcebearing hips

that’s just my nightstand knife don’t worry

girl is that a knife in your hand or are you jerking off your sharp detachable penis in my stomach

Ghosts aren't real, it was probably just the house settling that gave you that blowjob

sorry, what were u saying again? i was eating a distractionberry

Once the dead horse decomposes, you're gonna wish you beat it more