Perspective Of I

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This is the current situation. ———- Forwarded message ———- From: “Prerna Uppal” Date: Apr 25, 2016 1:12 AM Subject: Life of prerna uppal… To: “Prerna Uppal” , “. Papa” Cc:  This is the current situation. Show quoted text I just wanted to file an FIR against my mother…  But my dad is emotionally unstable due to recent death of my grandfather….  And no emotional support from anyone in family at…

I wish I wasn't so fucked up.

Dear friend, I apologize I haven’t written to you in a while… I am probably typing it to you right now because of some selfish reason which I don’t wish to enclose. The fact is I don’t remember what I wrote to you last time. Too much or too little has happened and seriously? at the moment I am just riled up… too much fucking adrenaline. I feel like if I don’t right to you right now I will not do…

I know everyone have lots of problem in their lives but mine just seem so big that I can't see past them, I am selfish.

Dear friend, Sorry I haven’t written to you in last 21 days… Perhaps I was too busy, too distracted or too happy to be sad… But it’s all superficial, isn’t it? You finally have a happy streak and deep down you are afraid that you will get bad again and eventually it does happen. Well today is the day, I got bad for once in these 21 days but I got over it, I am hoping that writing to you will help…

I just feel #worthless, I know I am not worth it.

Dear friend, Today is a terrible day, I wish it was just bad. Funny, how we miss things once we loose them… I will take bad days over terrible days anyday. I am back to pretend life… pretend you are not dying inside with every breath you take… pretend that you are not thinking about taking your life every second… pretend that you are not lonely… pretend that people care about you… pretend that…

You know what is really sad? No one looking past your mask or even trying to look past it.

Dear friend, How are you? Sorry I keep on forgetting to ask you about you.. I guess I am just too lost to look beyond my own head and that kinda makes me a bad friend. So, I apologize. This week hasn’t been a good one… I made a few decisions… Have been miserable, discovered something about me and well just felt lonely while sitting in between family gathering. I dread going back to University (I…

What’s worse than knowing you want something, besides knowing you can never have it? #LostCause

Dear friend, What do you think is worse… Not reaching out or reaching out to a friend but them telling you they have other important things in life even when they know that you are going down a downward spiral. Does that define as you being a lost cause? or another friend, who knows everything, saying that you are just overreacting, defines you as lost cause? I guess today should be marked as…

Or to find a way to make it all stop, to turn these feelings off

Dear friend, I know I shouldn’t have come home, I am always at height of depression when at home. I don’t like that my dad remarried even when I was the one to give him the go ahead. I just never thought that he will go ahead and marry. I don’t go along with the second wife…. All she does and did for four years now is to point out my flaws to me and tell me how crappy a person I am by pointing…