I love shipping(o≧▽≦ﾉ

Dick: Okay! Lunch is ready! I made barbecue chicken sandwiches. They’re not as good as Clark’s but we’re going to have to make it work.

Jason: Fuck.

Tim, holding baby Jon: Oh now you did it, Dickhead.

Jon, tearing up: Cwark? Daddy and Mama gone!! Miss them!!!

Kon, hungry as fuck and scared of the baby kryptonian: Hush, pup, only a day more and mama and daddy will feel better.

Cass, nodding but still grabbing her plate: Yes pup, patience.

Jon: Pay-shuns?

Damien: Yes, patience, baba and Clark are going to be better soon.

Steph and Duke, the victims of his last eye laser tantrum an hour ago: Yep yep!! So soon!!

Dick: Everyone grab food and we’re going outside. He’s a time bomb.

Clark has an extensive Batman merch collection and buying the plushie was not unusual for him. What was unusual was modifying it to turn it into a sex doll, it wasn't his fault really, the plushie felt so much like Batman, all warm and adorably grumpy as if he was questioning his every decision.

So Clark had to turn it into a sex doll so that he can take out his frustrations and fantasies related to Batman on the doll and it worked wonders. Clark used the doll multiple times every day.

An AO3 skin with some angel vibes

Sorry, my idea of angels mostly comes from Supernatural and way too much Destiel fic, so I hope that’s okay.

here is the code

based on this code and this code

I wanted this skin to have a soft green palette with a subtle, dreamy feel.

And I present to you, reporter Clark Kent accidentally getting stuck between the 3 holy faces of billionaires aka Bruce Wayne, Oliver Queen and Alex Luthor and somehow getting roped into playing a VERY passive aggressive game of FMK where he accidentally ends up blurting out about how much he would like to marry Batman and rawdog him while the man is wearing his batsuit and growling in his ears to put his back into fucking him(at no point of this ridiculous conundrum is he aware of the fact that Bruce Wayne, is indeed, The Batman)

This is how large Clark Kent is meant to be.

A true bear in human form. He has to duck down every time he enters a room, his shoulders are too wide to walk in straight through a door.

He tries to find oversized suits but it's next to impossible to find something that is an oversized fit. He towers over everyone. The only reason he's not been exposed as Superman is because of his hypno glasses.

Because I like tormenting Hal, he's present for this. Sorry Hal fans, I just have a little beef with him lol

---

"We gonna die," Hal said, watching Superman - brainwashed by some Poison Ivy's pheromones - stalking towards them. He cornered Hal and Bruce and now was going to fry their brains. "I thought you always wore kryptonite on you."

"I have something better I wear on me at all time," Bruce responded, not looking even slightly worried.

"Another kryptonite?" Hal guessed, pressing his back to the wall behind them.

Bruce smirked. "Something like that." He took off his cape. "Look away if you don't want to see it."

Hal's eyes grew larger when the utility belt followed.

"See what?! What are you going to do?!" he shouted frantically, face growing hot when Bruce began taking off the lower part of his suit. "Oh my god! Are you fucking kidding me?!"

Hal quickly covered his eyes with his hand, but he couldn't help but peek from between his fingers a little. He avoided looking at Bruce, uh... delicates while the man lowered himself to the ground, laying down on his own cape.

Superman paused and tilted his head as if in confused. Hal couldn't blame him, this was so bizarre. And it only got worse when Bruce spoke.

"You recognize this, Kal?" he purred sensually. Hal desperately tried to ignore the squelching sound accompanying Bruce's words.

Superman stood still, nostrils flaring.

Hal could practically hear the satisfaction in Bruce's voice.

"Yes, you do," he chuckled. Superman took a step, but only towards Bruce, then hesitated, as if fighting with himself. "Come on, Kal. Come and get what's yours."

Whatever control Ivy's pheromones had on him, it snapped instantly.

"Oh my god!" Hal yelled, horrified when Superman dove right between Bruce's legs and they both moaned. "You son of a bitch, you really are doing it!"

"You better go," Bruce instructed, already out of breath, voice shaking from whatever Superman was doing. "He's still not fully back yet, and it's better if he doesn't-ah!... See you or he'll get protective."

"Yeah, I don't need an encouragement, I'm getting the fuck out of here!"

Hal ran as fast as he could, and he thought he was gone for when he heard Superman growl angrily. Bruce quickly redirected the Kryptonian’s attention.

"Eyes down there, Kal," he said and Superman's growl turned into a pleased purr.

Wayne's kitchen & kent's bakery😋

lex luthor: “i have found the rarest kryptonite i could get my hands on.. lets see what it does to you, SUPERMAN!!” *throws pink kryptonite gas bomb at him*

justice league: “SUPERMAN, WATCH OUT!” but they’re too late, superman’s already coughing and rubbing his eyes. the justice league, and lex luthor wait to see the effect. after a couple of minutes, the gas slowly fades out and superman is standing upright, looking at everyone.

superman: “i’m… okay? i guess nothing happens-?” he says, before looking at batman for a split second and immediately turning bright red.

batman, immediately rushing over: “what? what’s wrong?” he says, placing a hand on superman’s chest to feel his heartbeat. its beating faster than normal, which concerns him.

superman: “nothing, B, you know how usually i, i-i get distracted by how handsome you are, and normally i can keep a cool face but..” superman is thankful batman is blocking his lower body from everyone around, because batman immediately notices the growing situation and groans internally.

batman: “are you serious.” out of all the kryptonites to be exposed to, batman runs into one that gets his husband hornier than he usually is. batman pinches his nose, and sighs deeply.

superman, making the saddest face ever with his flushed cheeks: “i’m so-so sorry i didn’t meant to! you know how—“

batman: “don’t. don’t explain it. let’s just. deal with this another time. is there anything else wrong?”

superman: “okay don’t get mad, but, i-i-i do also have this really strong urge to breed you—“ batman covers his mouth with his hand, effectively shutting him up, and immediately turns superman to face the wall to hide his (large) boner. the justice league, and lex luthor, stood speechless, because superman and batman were in fact, not whispering at all.

Bruce didn't know English when they first met, but he learned some broken phrases from Clark over the months they befriended each other.

So when Bruce appears with a baby, he drops it in shocked Clark's arms and says: "You, me, baby."