Donât stay alive for someone else.
Donât stay alive because you might hurt someone who cares.
Because in the end, that is never enough. Maybe itâll talk you down today, but eventually you get tired of being selfless. Eventually you get tired of not hurting anyone else, when all they do is hurt you. Eventually, you want a chance to change something, and itâs so fucking easy to believe that you can do it better by dying than living.
I have been there. So please believe me when I say-
Stay alive for the child in your baby pictures.
The one with light in their eyes, who has nothing but beautiful ideas of what the world can be, and who has dreams for when they grow up. Stay alive for that child and their dreams, because that child is you and the dreams never really go away. Theyâre just buried somewhere. And you deserve to live them.
Or for the child in the pictures that doesnât have that light. That doesnât have those dreams, that never had them, because they have lived surrounded by darkness, and they have grown up believing that there is no way out of it. Because they deserve-because you deserve-one picture taken with a genuine laugh on your lips, and a genuine light in your eyes.
Stay alive, because you havenât eaten every ice cream flavor possible yet, and you deserve to. Because ice cream is good.
(Stay alive if youâre lactose intolerant, or vegan, or just donât like ice cream, because have you ever tried homemade vegan cake? Or handmade meringues? Believe me, those are worth living for. For you.)
Stay alive, because the sunrise is beautiful, even if you have to wake up early to see it-and sunset is beautiful too, and requires no extra staying awake.
Stay alive, because you might get the chance to watch a golden retriever swim, and then shake the water off on their owner, and there are few things in life more entertaining than that.
Stay alive, because horses have a speed just before a gallop where they move so smoothly you almost forget youâre on one, and the power in that moment is incredible.
Stay alive, because it rains on the beach sometimes without any lightning, and being in the waves in that moment, where the rain on your lips washes away the salt, and steals away the heat, and the sea turns as gray as the sky, is awe-inspiring.
Stay alive, because some days, in tiny towns in the mountains, fog rolls in and covers all of the surroundings, and the sky is entirely silver, and you feel like youâre lost in a storybook.
Stay alive, because sea turtles crawl onto the sand at night to lay eggs, and if youâre quiet and lucky and turn off your lights, maybe youâll be able to watch one. Maybe youâll get close enough to touch it, and smell what the sea is like on land.
Stay alive, because no matter how many mistakes youâve made, you can never forgive yourself for them, or heal from them, or grow, if youâre dead. (And neither can anyone else, not really-but this, here and now, is for you.)
Stay alive, because when lightning is trapped inside of a cloud, it lights up the entire inside, and if itâs the right time of night, the edges of the clouds turn purple, and there is a masterpiece inside the stars.
Stay alive, because you can dig your hand into soil under grass, and it will be warm and soft against your fingers, and you can crumple it into your palms, and be holding the planet inside your hands.
Stay alive, because there are people out there who squeak when they laugh, and it is well worth becoming friends with them, because once you get them to even giggle once, you will be entertained for an hour at least.
Stay alive, because the embers of a campfire under the stars late at night start to look more like a reflection than a dying fire, except painted in red instead of silver, and you will never see anything more beautiful than that.
Stay alive, because as stupid as they are, memes can be funny.
Stay alive, because racing down a freeway in a car with the windows rolled down so that wind races through your hair and stings tears into your eyes, playing music loud enough that you have to yell along, is possibly the fastest your heart will ever beat, and all of the energy is good.
Stay alive, because ice cracks when you drop it into warm enough water, and that sound on a sweltering day, and the way it tastes, especially if your tongue is dry enough, is enough to make you want to drink until your stomach is full.
Stay alive, because rain has a smell, but so does river water, and even once you smell them both, it takes more than a lifetime to decide which one is blue and which one is green.
Stay alive. Because life is waiting for you. Because there is beauty to see, and to touch, to smell and to taste, and to hear, all around you. Stay alive, because when you are alive, you can live.
And you-you-regardless of who you are-you have so much to live for. That will always be inside you, without you ever having to rely on someone else. Stay alive, because you wouldnât be given those moments if you didnât deserve them, and believe me, you deserve them.