patrick evans

Or just 45 minutes since he figured his way out of the situation with the help of his friends.

Well, that’s always good then.

I wouldn’t know, I rarely get to indulge in sleep but when I do, I just pass the fuck out.

Touché. I would do too, but I think I’ve gotten used to staying up and all that jazz, so no sleep for me, at the moment.

I didn’t, but I did party with them. James Corden is my new BFF, although I doubt he actually remembers agreeing to that. He was wasted.

To be fair, I would probably go down that route too, if I had to host an award-show.

Good good. The more you enjoy it the better. 

What’d you two get up to?

I don’t think I could ask for better company, to be fair.

To make people sick? 

Well yay for having the best Valentines day. Mine was pretty great too.

To gross people out, with the lovey doveyness. I mean, it’s a whole day dedicated to it, it’s bound to make some people sick.

HEAVEN: It was like necklaces with lightsabers that had a very famous saying from Han Solo and Leia

Good child? Man, I wish I lived in the fantasy land you live in. It must be nice.

Damn, dude…going all out, huh?

Fantasy? Ask mom and dad, it’s all true.

Did you have fun?

Yeah, I had a really amazing time, thank you. 

True and you never realize how great sleep is or appreciate it properly until you have no time to sleep.

I don’t think I’ve had proper sleep since January 3rd. I miss it. What’s it like? Are there any new trends these days, when it comes to sleep?

Do people even know what St. Valentine’s actually is? It’s sad that people need to come up with a special date to wear hot ass edible lingerie, and buy roses and remind people they’re loved. What’s worse, the people who feel incredibly accomplished for not being alone on a day that’s like any other.

You mean the priest who got executed because he married people in secret, which was against the law? Yeah, I know. I just figured I’d use the day to actually do something nice for my girlfriend, and make sure she wasn’t left out while every other girl around her got something nice from their boyfriends. I guess it’s just down to personal opinions of the day, right?

I didn’t get one. I didn’t perform or present anything, but I totally wanted one. You need to talk to Paisley Clarington for that kind of insider info.

Ugh, too much of a bother. Did you get to shake any celebrities’ hand?

This is both cute and gross all at the same time, but I guess that’s what liking a person does to you.

Yeah, I kinda enjoy it though, to be fair.

That idea was already proposed and denied, but thank you for your input.

Well, tell your friend that he/she just needs to deal with a dead arm for a good 8 hours.

Oh my goodness, Patrick I am so happy for you! Now who is the lucky lady?

Heaven Hayward - she’s incredible. Just everything you could possibly dream of.

This was like really long and I didn’t really read it so like, happy v day, bro.  Hope it was a good one.

Tl;dr - I spent valentine’s day with my girlfriend. It was quite epic, to say the least.

I think I threw up a little from the pure cheesiness of this post. 

But glad you are having a great day.

I think that’s the purpose of Valentine’s Day.