pat-man

Ryan, half waking up:

The doctor, standing in the corner of his bedroom holding a knife:

Ryan: asfgh????????

The doctor: oh good you're awake, check out this cool dagger I found, I think I got it from Saladin, wanna hold it?

Ryan: .........no. that's ok.

it was about john the whole time. a conductor of fucking light. slight of hand - subversion of expectation.

"it's not a detective show its a show about a detective", we absolutely fucking ball. it was never about the cases. emotional driven narrative. the cases serve as mirrors for the emotional plot.

Bonus points if it’s narrated by Watson and he never explicitly mentions that him and Holmes are dating (though he probably alludes to it pretty heavily because my guy cannot help himself) because of course they’re in Victorian London and nobody can know. You can even have fun with it: Lestrade more than once walks in on them clearly having just finished kissing sitting too close together probably blushing, and completely fails to make the connection, like is completely sure they’re just like really close friends. Mrs Hudson stumbles into increasingly incriminating situations without comment, until at some point it becomes blatantly obvious that she Knows and just doesn’t care so long as they pay their rent. Sherlock’s intelligence means he’s always three steps ahead of the police, allowing for there to be little risk of them being caught, which allows for varied stakes depending on the plot of the episode (because this is an episodic show and the main characters’ personal lives aren’t usually the focus).

However! There needs to be at least one case where their client is gay, maybe their lover was killed or they’re being blackmailed or something, and they go to Holmes because obviously they can’t go to the police, and it’s treated completely seriously, like all the other cases. Maybe even a criminal is gay (a spurned lover committing murders of passion or something) and neither Holmes nor Watson mentions that part to the police, because that is not the crime they need to be punished for. Acknowledging that queer people existed in Victorian London opens up so many options for new stories that ACD wasn’t able to write during his lifetime! There’s so much potential here!!!

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It's been one day since I officially came out as ace to myself. ONE DAY!! But oh my god, everything is just so much clearer and makes so much sense now??? So I want to share all the little things I can recall that are very obviously ace in my life before I realize I'm ace, because I think it's fun and can be helpful to whoever is looking for clues and similarities!!

I put the label of bisexuality on myself when I was around 18. Because I like girls and boys on the same level. I think they look so nice in this dress or that suit. And the human body is a wonder. I am obsessed with naked bodies, just like all those marble sculptures from the Renaissance. Yes. Exactly like that.

I've had sexual dreams before. A few times, actually. They were about me, in the action... and they did nothing for me physically. And I feel grossed out after waking up.

On the other hand, there WERE other dreams that did trigger a physical reaction (and honestly, I do love how it feels when you wake up to that particular feeling), but said dreams all had nothing to do with sex.

At 22, I learned that people actually feel an urge toward strangers they see that excites them. Someone online described it as the urge to pet a cute dog. I felt baffled because REALLY????? Omg. Mind blown.

I always thought the love songs were exaggerations. For example. "I'm in love with the shape of you/I'm in love with your body" really does not make sense to me.

I hate it when movies do that "cue romantic music, cue two people that met three days ago started getting close and started kissing" thing. Kissing doesn't gross me out, but that seems like the fakest thing I've ever seen. There's no way that's real. Right? ...What do you mean that's real? WHAT DO YOU MEAN????

I still want sex and romance, but never in my life I've imagined myself to get with any other real-life people around me. Nor any celebrities. Or really hot fictional characters.

I have fantasies, but half of the time, it's about fictional characters that don't involve me. the other half about fictional characters and scenarios I made up in my head meant to please myself.

I love reading smutty fanfics. I LOVE THEM. I've seen the 18+ videos before (not anymore, but I did go through a phase a few years back). Sex jokes are hilarious when they're not insulting. Suggesting arts are so fun to admire and so hot to look at.

I like getting creative in my... alone time. I enjoy those times as well and plan to keep enjoying them. I think of doing things I like with other people, but I'm more focused on the physical sensation than the person. In other words, I feel like I can do it with anyone who makes me feel safe and secure enough because the act is more of the thing I want than the people.

I am super into art, and things that are pretty, and I remember one time looking at a very well-designed web page layout and thinking to myself, I'm so turned on right now.

I am more turned on by the curve on a girl's waist than boobs or ass, if "turned on" means I want to grab that pretty waist at the curve and squeeze a little... and that's about it

Ahh, I still have a final to prepare for, so I'm stopping here for now. This is fun! Maybe I'll come back later to add more!

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Regulus:*putting a knife against the strangers throat*

Regulus:"I have a boyfri-"*turns around*

James: