maps are yucky

hey there! are you tired of accidentally reblogging from TERFs and other transphobes? then have no fear, for the shinigami eyes extension (chrome/firefox) is there for you.

with it, you can identify social media users and pages that are trans-friendly and the ones that are transphobic!

SOMEONE tried to claim that THESE

If you don’t want to put up with that negativity and transphobia, please block them

y'all know what to do

we have this app called toogoodtogo where restaurants/cafes/bakeries/hotels and so on sell their leftovers for really cheap to reduce foodwaste

i got all of this for €4 from starbucks

For those of us who have been emotionally abused/neglected, we may not know what a healthy relationship looks or feels like. It was our parents’ job to model healthy relationships, but if they did not treat us (or each other) well, our concept of relationships becomes what we have seen or experienced. We end up in a pattern of getting into relationships that remind us or are a mirror to what we’ve experienced in the past–with its pain and toxicity. It’ll take us time to really know healthy relationships as they should be, but here is a good place to start: address your current relationships to see if they are meeting the below criteria. Address and re-assess. 

(Note: this is by no means an exhausted list, but instead, a starting point for you to explore your relationships. Also, ask yourself specifically, what do I need in a relationship? There may be some things others don’t value as strongly, but are very important to you. Acknowledge that you have every right to need what you need in a relationship).

1. Mutual respect. Does the person accept you for who you are? Does the person appreciate your individuality and the right to make your own choices? Does the person acknowledge the right to your own thoughts and feelings? Are you able to do the same?

2. Trust. Do you feel safe with the person, physically and psychologically? Is the person someone who you can depend on? 

3. Honesty. Does the person keep to their word? Does the person show consistency with their words and actions? Does the person communicate their thoughts and feelings openly with you? Conversely, are you able to communicate openly with them?

4. Interdependence. Do both the person and you have your own lives, as well as take individual responsibility for yourselves? Do you mutually communicate your own needs to one another, while maintaining respect for the other person’s limits and boundaries? Is there a sense in your relationship that you are sharing your lives with one another, as opposed to overly depending on the other person to fill your every desire and need?

5. Communication. Do you and the person communicate your thoughts and feelings with one another? Does the person strive to actively listen to you, both in good times and in bad? Is the person able to acknowledge your perspective, even if there is disagreement? Is there a mutual agreement to work through conflicts openly and respectfully? Do you do the same for the other person? Remember, communication takes two–speaking AND listening. It is helpful to look at yourself and ask if you are struggling to do some of these things, so you know what you can work on.

6. Realistic Expectations. Does the person realize it is not your job to meet all of their needs and expectations? Does the person understand you are human and thus prone to occasional mistakes, and that is okay? Does the person love and accept you as you are, everything that you are… knowing that you are not perfect? Are you able to do the same?

“don’t tag as [ship name]!”

The Buzzfeed article was titled “This Man Invited People To A “BBQ Not Orgy” On Grindr And It Was Surprisingly Heartwarming.” It’s about how Chris Bowman, a 61 year old man from Apex, North Carolina has been hosting an annual summer BBQ. He advertises this BBQ through the gay dating/hookup app, Grindr. It’s about how the event is surprisingly sweet and Bowman, who is a recovered alcoholic, wants to give back to the community and bring people together.

TL;DR Chris is a registered sex offender with a history of pedophilia and preying on young people. His ‘not an orgy’ and community talk is a gaslighting tactic to groom young people into having sex with him. Buzzfeed, Vice, and other social media outlets giving his event a platform endangers LGBT youth.

Buzzfeed Link: Click Here

Time for the real shit. Buckle UP.

A group of four of us (J, M, S, and A) attended the BBQ in the summer of 2017. J received an invite similar to the one shown in the Buzzfeed article over Grindr, and we’re young and dumb so we decided what the hell, let’s go. We rolled up and saw a fire truck and ambulance already there. He’d invited the local fire department and EMS to attend the BBQ. The food was admittedly very good, and the crowd was a strange mix of after-church and from Grindr. Most of the other folks at the BBQ seemed fine and kind. Buzzfeed got that right. Here is what they left out:

HE’S A SEX CRIMINAL

His page on the NC registry: Click Here

More information about his charges & appeal: Click Here

1997: Chris is giving Daniel, a 14 yo boy, a golf lesson. He locks the doors to the store and turns off the lights. He comes up behind Daniel under the impression of adjusting the child’s technique. He reaches down into Daniel’s underwear and molests him.

1998: Chris’s daughter has two friends over for a slumber party. They are sisters. When everyone is asleep, Jessica, a 15 yo girl, is walking down the stairs of his multi-level house. Chris approaches, pulls down her shorts, and performs oral sex on her. He stops when Jessica’s sister stumbles upon the scene.

2005: Chris provides his house as a location for two friends, a 24 yo and 18 yo, to have sex with their underage girlfriends, 14 yo and 15 yo.

He appealed his 2005 convictions that testimony from 1997 & 98 was inadmissible in the determination of guilt phase of his trial.

THE BBQ

Chris knew who we were and immediately inserted himself into our group. We figured, yeah we’ll talk with him a while—he gave us all this food, so we kind of have to (!!THIS IS HIS STRATEGY!!). Anyway, we listened to him talk about orgies, sex, golf, and drugs in Europe for about an hour. Topics he hit:

-        Orgies he’d attended in downtown Paris where you circled the arc de triumph in your car until forming a chain of other searching cars that would eventually peel off into a warehouse or somewhere to initiate the orgy. It’s cool you, should totally try it sometime! OKAY.

-        He talked a lot about how his favorite drug to use was Black Beauty

-        He talked a lot about how good the golfing was in Scotland (He molested a 14 yo boy in 1997 while teaching a golf lesson!)

-        He spent a lot of time trying to convince us to attend the “BBQ After Dark”

The heat was incredible that day and we were starting to get tired of his weird sex talk. Chris saw this and asked J what was wrong. J told him it was just kind of hot. Chris followed up by inviting J to go on and take his shirt off. J said no, he was fine. Chris said, “Oh no, come on! Take your shirt off! I’ll take my shirt off!” J ignored it. We were all uncomfortable. Throughout the ENTIRE event, Chris constantly reminded us about the after dark portion of the BBQ, which we were all very invited to. We had no plans of going, but kept our refusals soft and polite out of respect, because again, the BBQ is a tactic to make you treat him kinder and feel bad about thinking he’s creepy.

THE NEXT DAY

This was when the solicitations started. For the next year and a half until J deleted his Grindr last fall, Chris continued to send J messages trying to move things forward. He also tried to pick up A and S through J’s Grindr. He’s talked about how he’s really excited about the buzz the event has been getting and how he’s hoping the event will grow and grow. J hasn’t responded to the messages that have kept coming for over a year. Attached are a few screenshots.

CONCLUSION

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IF YOU SEE

• MAP/NOMAP

• A CLOWN EMOJI

• A CIRCUS TENT EMOJI

• OR AOA IN THEIR TWITTER BIO

>

The plan for the 17th, when the adult content ban comes in, is to protest.

To do that, we are making as much noise either side of the 17th as possible, and using the site as normal.

On the 17th, dead silence.

People are saying log off but what they really mean is don’t open the site or the app.

But, on the 17th make as much noise as possible on every other platform. Tweet about it and post on facebook and instagram and everywhere else.

What this does is causes a massive dip in ad revenue for one single day. That does not make staff think ‘oh everyone’s gone let’s shut down.’ What it actually makes them think is ‘oh shit people aren’t happy and if people don’t keep using our site we’re out of money and out of jobs.’

A boycott reminds a company that the users (consumers) have the power to make their site (business) worthless with one single coordinated decision.

If you want to join in, here’s what to do:

Do:

Close all open instances of the app and site on all your devices before the 17th

Make posts before and after the 17th on tumblr and other platforms, talking about why this ban is bad

Make posts on other sites during the 17th. Flood the official tumblr staff twitter and facebook with your anger and your opinion

Come back on the 18th and check in

Don’t:

Delete the app from your phone (this doesn’t affect their revenue and since it’s off the store at the moment it’ll be hard to get back)

Delete your account. I mean you can if you want to, but if you keep your account and don’t use it you’re saying to staff that there’s still time to save it. If you delete it’s hard work to come back.

Open the app or website (including specific blogs)

Make any posts (turn down/off your queue and make sure nothing is scheduled)

Go quiet elsewhere. Make it clear that this is just about tumblr, not a mass move away from all social media.

Remember: the execs don’t care about anything but money. Shutting down the site means there’s $0 further income from it. That’s their last possible course of action. If we make it clear we’re not happy, they’ll have to do something or we can do more and more until it becomes too expensive.

Relationship statue: Single

Fav color: Damn uh blue or red?

3 ships: Marsaline × princess bubblegum (Adventure time) Sans × Toriel (Undertale) and Noelle × Susie (Deltarune)

Lipstick or chapstick: Chapstick

Last song: Bo en my time (don’t know who it’s by someone tell me.)

Current read: The Twisted Ones (The FNAF book)

Relationship status: I'm as single as a Pringle and not ready to mingle

Fav colour: purple n green

Fav ships: I'm a sucker for bubbleline, fruk and catdora

Lipstick or Chapstick: lipstick

Last song I listened to: drunk by Ed Sheeran

Companies do not experience one day of revenue loss and pull the plug, destroying years of work and firing dozens if not hundreds of employees.

Companies which experience loss in revenue and consumer interest make investments and changes in order to regain their users/customers. That’s why organized protests and boycotts WORK. Tumblr will NOT go down after one bad day or week, but they might be willing to listen to its userbase if we put up an organized protest. (If you don’t believe me, think about how long sites like MySpace and Google+ hang around with fractions of their previous user base, often for years.)

Yahoo paid over one billion dollars for Tumblr, and the website will not go offline because of a one-day event, so in conclusion,

DO log off on December 17th to show Tumblr that you disapprove of its recent content ban and clumsy execution of censorship.