Lucid Insanity

reblog to tell the person you reblogged this from that they are deserving of love and affection

the main thing that puts me off of playing chess is that there is 2000 years of gameplay that hundreds of people with higher IQs than me have spent thousands of hours studying the history of, so much so that when i put the pawn forward they say “ah i see youre going for the bulgarian somersault” and then i try to take their bishop with my knight and they go “aw, rookie mistake, youve played the frenchmans cumsock, and in approximately 37 moves i’ll have won”

they reattached his forearms during the surgery god bless

they should invent being awake and attentive and having energy

when a film or tv show takes place somewhere where you have been, it is your sacred duty as viewer to say “i’ve been there” every time you recognize a place

When a film or TV show claims to take place somewhere but you been there and it is your sacred duty as a view to say “no the hell that is not there.”

We can't ibuprofen our way outta this one boys

This post was meant as a joke but it has come to my attention that literally none of us are ok

how am i supposed to relax when there are things

Anyone who cleans public restrooms should automatically make $100/hr

horse girl polycule voting on issues in the stable like “all against say neigh”

i know this joke is reaching the end of its tumblr lifespan, sorry for beating a… well, you know

they voted unanimously to freak out at a stray plastic bag in the wind btw

At least I look pretty when my face is in your lap.

Where there is smoke there is fire and I am pleased with either.

see that girl you just called a bitch? she didn’t hear you say it louder

Kiss me with your teeth.

i love those blinking red lights they put on top of radio towers and windmills and skyscrapers etc, theyre like electronic flowers or something to me