Its Not About The Pasta

As a real Certified Cry Baby Bitch it fucking kills me when actors in tv and movies have a big crying scene and make the big sobbing face and all the expressions that go with crying but don’t actually have tears. Scrunching up their face real aggressively but NO Tears falling. It feels a little ridiculous that holllywood hasn’t come up with a solution for this? I understand that crying on command can be hard but there must be some movie magic that can be done. Anyways, this happens in Off Campus approximately 3-4 times with Hannah where she has a Big Crying Close Up Shot but no tears. Lol

I must not listen to the mountain goats song about suicide. Listening to the mountain goats song about suicide is the mind killer. Listening to the mountain goats song about suicide is the little death that

Also I just want (obama voice) to make one thing clear : I don’t want Garrett/ Logan end game. That’s not the point. That’s not what I’m here for. I’m not trying to be a misogynist or heterophobe and do away with the woman in the happy relationship. Garrett should be with Hannah. I want Logan pining after Garrett in a confused and tortured way bc I love gay angst. Real “One of Your Girls” by Troy Sivan hours. He’s Garrett’s best friend and confidant. Playing on the Bruins together is the dream. He’s seen him naked about one hundred million times and it’s not weird. But maybe one day they’re hanging out on the couch at the house and Garrett’s knee bumps his and it makes him feel a type of way. And ugh, Hannah’s here again. She’s here all the time now. I guess she is kind of cute. There must be something to her if Garrett likes her so much. Maybe if Logan got to know her better, he’d understand why Garrett likes her so much. She’s got a nice smile. Garrett’a got a nice smile, too.

i know they are setting up a love triangle situation with Logan/ Hannah/ Garrett but you cant tell me it also doesnt read as Logan being jealous of Hannah. Because she gets to (fake) date Garrett. Sure, sure, he wants her. But maybe there’s also a part of him that wants to *be* her. And when he kisses her, he's also kissing Garrett, indirectly. And when it’s suggested that he should sing summer nights at karaoke with Garrett, what’s his response? “I would be a mean Sandy.” Like yeah uh im sure you would. Faggot!

Thé problem with off campus, as far as I can tell, two episodes in, is that it is written and acted as if it’s a Disney original movie but it also wants to be the Sexy Show for Adults but also About Sexual Assault. It is dripping in romance novel writing (derogatory). You can also tell it was written by a gen xer because the college kids are all obsessed with the 80s. Baby the kids these days don’t care about the 80s. They’re doing Y2K now. They’re dressing as if it’s 2006 and listening to Pit Bull, not Metallica. Whatever. Who cares. I’ll probably watch the rest. The hot boy protagonist has endeared himself to me.

I think the kind, long haired one is gay, and maybe in love with Garret. And if he isn’t, he should be. # off campus # off campus live watch #lorret #gogan

off campus? More like turn that shit OFF and