[via www]

Through a traditional Western public proposal, the man presents himself as the “hero”. He, down on one knee, places himself in a physically vulnerable position in front of the woman whom he “loves”. Through this physical act, he is displaying the sacrifice of his ego and his funds to put himself at the mercy of the woman standing over him. He is hopeful, emotional, but also flexing his own ego through the jewelry he holds up to his “love”. An expensive ring, worth many months' salary, shows that he is a “real man” who can shower his woman in lavish gifts. After all, he holds the spending power. Though he is down on his knees, pretending to submit to this woman’s desires, he holds all the power. He has made the decision that they should marry. He has chosen the expensive ring that this woman must wear for the entirety of their relationship. He has chosen to perform this act in front of a crowd. This crowd places pressure on the woman. While he is on his knees in front of her, pretending that she holds the power, she is rendered virtually powerless. She had no say in time, place, ring or audience. She has the option to say no but will face the backlash of the crowd and the man. How dare she crush the heart of this man who has lowered himself below a woman, saved for months maybe years to purchase this symbol of his “love” without her input. He dares her to refuse. Kate Chastain recently said, “Any decent woman says yes, then turns him down in private.” To say no is to humiliate this man in public. The only acceptable answer is yes. How dare she say now. How dare he propose in public. 

The ring which draws in so much attention symbolizes this man’s power, manliness, and wealth. With this ring, he stakes his claim on this woman. All others should beware. For is it he who saved 4 months' salary and lowered himself before this woman. He won her. He owns her. Through a proposal and an engagement, the man is given all of the power through his finances, gifts, and planning. The woman is showered in unexpected gifts and expected to smile and find joy in her life being planned by someone else, by her life being claimed by someone else.