orin

I love how Lara Croft's first instinct when coming across a sarcophagus is to immediately open it and then magically gain ancient knowledge. I bet no one invites her to funerals anymore because every time they try to lower the coffin, she just shows up and opens it, suddenly becoming proficient in Microsoft Excel.

Congratulations to Jax TADC for being the first Tumblr Sexyman to transition to a Tumblr Sexywoman

Overheard a 13 yr old explaining how jax was a trans lesbian to his dad at amc today

I remember one time I got INSANELY high off of edibles while playing Among Us, and it quickly became apparent to the other players online. I forget how honestly but literally anything "sus" I did was ignored by everyone because I was so fucking high. I tested this theory by standing in front of a body and the person that actually reported it didn't even mention me. The funniest part was when I was trying to do wires, I kept fucking up over and over again, so I was just standing in front of wires for actual minutes trying to figure it out. A small crowd of players gathered around me to watch and would get mad every time someone reported a body or emergency meeting because "she's never going to get her tasks done if you keep interrupting them." I don't think anyone cared about winning at that point, they just wanted to see the high crew mate succeed in her tasks.

THIS IS 1000% ACCURATE LMFAO. Thank you op

it’s 2014 it’s time we moved on as a nation and stop reblogging this

every person who reblogs this in 2015 is gonna get their ass kicked by yours truly

And i shit you not the pasta was creepy