hey Guys lol

I hate you job applications I hate you psychometric aptitude testing I hate you CVs I hate you interviews I hate you online forms I hate you never hearing back I hate you cover letters

rat bastard is such a funny insult

something about it is so weirdly hard hitting. you rat bastard. if someone called me that i’d be more offended than if they called me a motherfucker

love doing something I call ‘the big leaf test’ where I put my hand on a leaf and if the leaf is bigger than my hand I go damn that’s crazy

We all got that homie whose air of silliness doesnt hide the haunted look in their eyes😂👆

i just showed an ant the truth and it popped like a firecracker

woodstock chill man it's alright take your time it's no problem i love you thanks for being here

there's an antfluencer doing an icrumb giveaway in your backyard

that rock you kicked down the road and then left behind still thinks youre coming back for it one day btw

i call my parents and say ‘yeah i can’t do family stuff tonight, i got too much stuff to do for school’ and i e-mail my professor and say ‘i can’t do my assignments tonight, work got crazy’ and i text my boss and say ‘sorry i can’t work late tonight, i gotta some family stuff’ and through this triangulation of deceitful excuses i at last will be free