what were you doing parked in the shade for two hours?

Dead wife montage but it's all slow motion shots of your dead wife throwing grenades and doing backflips and oneshotting the enemy with their long range weapons

by the fourth or fifth time you "come back wrong" no ones even impressed anymore

Dead wife montage but it's all slow motion shots of your dead wife throwing grenades and doing backflips and oneshotting the enemy with their long range weapons

i’m trying to have a yaoi moment with you. man to man i’m trying to have a yaoi moment with you right now

they just prescribed me gunshot to the head at the urgent care

look, do i think Kaikaina and Tucker ever got over that hurdle of him literally nuking her romantic feelings? not really. do i think they're Good Friends with Great Benefits? hell yeah! i also very firmly believe that Tucker, the first time he actually gets her clothes off, is like, "holy shit, you have stretch marks??" but before Kaikaina can summon the rage of ten thousand women and punt him into the fuckin atmosphere (because god knows she's heard this Too Many Times) he takes off his own shirt to very proudly show off the stretch marks he got from Junior, "dude, we match! we're matching, Kai, look! oh my god, that's awesome!" and his earnest appreciation of her body does, much to Kaikaina's despair, make this incredibly frustrating moron that much more fuckable.

White boy shocks everyone at the restaurant by emitting a massive electromagnetic pulse