hi, i’m not sure if anyone would like to read this since it’s a silly idea that came out of nowhere. i still have the writer’s block and i judge every single word i’m writing. i thought i could write something short to exercise and i found the prompts on @creativepromptsforwriting ’s blog. i just want to explore ray’s personality and as i mentioned before, i’d love to write for him if you have any suggestions/requests 💗
‘Wow, you haven’t changed one bit. And that is not a compliment.’ You blurted out and by the look on his face, you’d say Raymond wasn’t happy with that comment. It’s been almost two years since you’ve last seen each other and well, even though it was hard at first, you’ve both found your own separate ways.
It wasn’t like things between you ended bad, on the contrary, you finished it promising you’ll stay on good terms. Raymond was deep in Mickey’s work, he had to be, given he was his right hand and you, you had your own plans for your life. You tried to wait for him, really. You forgave him when he missed dates and forgot special days but when he stopped coming home because he was too busy, you also stopped seeing a future with him.
You’d say you’ve tried your best to understand him, his whole personality and the line of his work. At first, you were ready to give him everything, you wanted to be comforting, caring and all of those other things he’d need. You’d ignore your work and wait for him in the night, only to see him once. You’d cook new meals you’d think he’d enjoy, only to eat them all alone in his big kitchen.
With time, you stopped feeling like you were in a relationship. He was all nice when he was around though, that was why you avoided the talk about breaking up for so long. He’d be such a gentleman all the time, showering you with love. Whenever you were invited to an event at the Pearson house, you’d notice how people admired the thing you’ve shared.
It started to feel like a show then, as if you were a habit. In the mornings, he’d be the businessman he needed to be. He’d have the same coffee, wear similar colours of clothing and many more other routines than you could count. At parties and stuff, he’d have you to hang on his arm.
That wasn’t the man you’ve fallen in love with, no. You’ve held so much respect for him, you really liked the way he had control over his life. You felt safe with him. You loved the way he’d go out of his way to try something new for you, whether it be a meal or a movie. He’d willingly create a mess with you without feeling to be neat. He’d hold your hand to take you dancing in the rain until you were both soaked, that was the man you’ve come to love.
Though you both tried, it didn’t work out. Raymond would never give up from work and you, you could never stay in a place you didn’t feel appreciated. You didn’t want him to give up everything for you, you’d never ask that but you wanted his attention, you craved his love.
It was how you were raised, in the end. If you felt like something or someone wasn’t enough for you, you’d leave and move on because you thought you deserved better than that, you knew you deserved better.
Breaking up with him was the hardest part, explaining to him you wanted more and knowing he couldn’t give that hurt both of you. ‘I love you, Ray. Don’t ever think I’m leaving because I don’t. I still feel this strange feeling I felt the first time when you reached out to hold my hand. I know we had our good days but I don’t think this thing between us going anywhere. I’m sorry.’ You tried to smile with tears running down your cheeks and he nodded, you knew he’d understand.
Now, you were face to face after two years and you were waiting for a response to your comment. ‘You already know I like having habits, y/n.’ Raymond finally said and you smiled with that, it wasn’t a happy smile since you were reminded of memories. He’d choose the same mug in the mornings, the same plate for lunch when he was at home, he’d read the same book when he was in a bad mood and he’d play the same songs when you two would try to make dinner.
‘Oh, I know that. There’s a change though, the beard suits you.’ You complimented this time, in an attempt to make up for your lash out. ‘You always said it would so I gave it a chance.’ You smiled and it was sincere, ‘Now please tell me Ray, why did Rosalind bother to call me this time? I thought I was long forgotten, just receiving invitations because of formality.’
‘Because it’s different this time, y/n. I thought about inviting you myself but I don’t know if that’d be the wisest choice. I know I mistreated you and made you feel like you were less. It’s just... It’s over now. Michael sold his business, he’s getting retired. Please, let me finish first.’
‘I know it’s selfish of me to reach out to you after all this time but I couldn’t live if I didn’t try once. I’m out now, y/n and I’m just wondering... That if you could give me one last chance? I know you may be in a relationship now, I understand if you don’t trust me again or you just don’t have those feelings anymore. I just need to know if we can try again because I hadn’t spent a day without thinking about you.’
Raymond stopped then, he didn’t want to scare you off. He’d do anything for you, even if it meant staying away. He finally looked directly into your eyes, searching for an answer. You held your tears as he held his breath and you were about to answer, when a gunshot was heard, suppressing the soft music in the ballroom as it rang in your ears.
