picture me in the trees

Of course, plenty of people who refuse to see Taylor Swift as queer are just plain homophobic. But I think there’s another segment of anti-Gaylors that we don’t talk about.

I think sometimes straight swifties are so aggressive about Taylor Swift being straight because they see queerness as this ₊⁺✧cool, exclusive club✧₊⁺ that they don’t get to be a part of, and they’re afraid that if Taylor Swift is queer then she’s yet another member of the cool exclusive club. They want her to be in THEIR club, because all the cool celebrities are queer, but at least the straights have Taylor Swift. So they get defensive about the possibility of her not being straight, because they don’t want to lose her as “one of us.” When Taylor Swift goes to the Queer Side, all the other straight people become less cool.

Less defensive straight swifties are often open to the possibility of her being queer - or can even see the signs themselves. That’s wonderful, and we appreciate those people. ♡

And gay swifties who call gaylors “delusional” are using this as a way to defend themselves against homophobia and be accepted by the dominant group (straight people). They’re saying, “I’m gay, but not THAT kind of gay” - it’s like cis gay people who are transphobic, or gay people who don’t associate with gay CULTURE. The kind of people who identify with “gay but not queer.” “I’m gay, but I’m not a WEIRD gay.” That’s internalized homophobia.

Have we considered “seashore” as the name of the hypothetical third album?

- can’t take credit for this idea but it’s one of many 8-letter words that end in -ore (like folklore and evermore). I know Taylor loves her water imagery too. This got me thinking...

- random bird noises + Taylor’s brother’s Eagles Instagram caption -> “my eagles T-shirt hanging from the door -> gold rush (third track on evermore)

- 3rd track on folklore -> the last great american dynasty

- BOTH track 3’s take place at the sea coast - “eyes like sinking ships on waters so inviting I almost jump in”/“coastal town” and “salt box house on the coast”/“facing the rocks staring out at the midnight sea”

seashore

🌊🌊🌊

❓❓❓

I feel like the Gaylor issue is so divisive and polarizing in the Swiftie fandom. I want to make space for nuance, acceptance, and a more relaxed conversation. And I want to make space for fans who don’t fit on either extreme end of the issue.

On one side, you have diehard Gaylors who insist that Taylor is OBVIOUSLY gay and that all her “boyfriends,” including Joe, have been beards. See also: Kaylor, Swiftgron, etc.

On the other side, you have the people who insist that Gaylors are delusional, her relationship with Joe is real, and Taylor is nothing more than an ally to the LGBTQ community. Side note: I really dislike the term “hetlor” because a) it feels mean and gross when said in a demeaning way, and b) believing she’s straight is the default so I feel like giving them their own term is in the realm of “straight pride.”

Sprinkled between these camps are the people who say stuff like, “It’s weird and gross to speculate about real people’s sexuality. Taylor is a private person and it isn’t our place to talk about her love life.” Or, “Speculating about people’s queerness is bad because it forces people out of the closet before they’re ready.” Which is very kind.

I feel like I don’t fit into either of these three groups.

Saying “Taylor’s relationship with Joe is fake” feels really dismissive of bisexuality. Bi people are the biggest segment of the LGBTQ community and somehow it seems like people forget they exist because they float in that middle ground. When we view the world through binaries, bi people seem like they’re full of contradictions. But, like all people, bi people just contain multitudes.

Saying Taylor is straight seems downright ridiculous, at least to me. The most obvious, “no heterosexual explanation for this” pieces of evidence are: the song Paris, the lyric “I swear you could hear a hairpin drop,” the 13 in northern Michigan in the Lavender Haze music video, and the idea that gay pride “makes me ME.” Here are some things I believe to be true: 1) If Taylor Swift were straight, she’d be too good of an ally to queerbait, and 2) Taylor Swift is too smart/well-read to make queer references accidentally.

The thing about the “don’t speculate about her personal life” argument is that speculating about Taylor Swift’s personal life pays her bills. Yes, she’s making and selling art. But she has chosen a life in the spotlight. She has consciously decided to sell her [personhood, brand, name, soul, whatever you want to call it]. She has chosen NOT to “take the money and her dignity and get the hell out.” She COULD choose the rose garden over Madison Square. But every day, she chooses not to. On the one hand, this “don’t speculate” argument is very noble. But there’s some part of me that wonders if the folks in this camp see themselves as potential future friends of Taylor and think that being speculative ruins their chances at that, ruins their chances of attending a secret session, etc. It’s sweet and kind AND it feels a little “pick me.” Here are some things I believe to be true: 1) If Taylor Swift were straight, she wouldn’t be offended that people think she is queer. 2) If Taylor Swift is queer, she’s not offended that people think she is queer.

And then there’s this weird, in-between camp that I fall into. Personally, I think Taylor Swift is a queer woman who is currently in a legitimate, long term relationship with her boyfriend Joe Alwyn. Do I think that she had relations of some kind with Karlie Kloss? Yeah, probably! Do I think that she is afraid to come out for fear of outing past lovers? Yeah, probably! Do I think she is afraid to come out for fear of alienating part of her fanbase? Yeah, probably! Do I think she is afraid to come out because she feels like her current relationship with a man will “delegitimize” her queerness? Definitely.

I want a label for people who have this opinion, because I see SO much hatred toward “Gaylors” from “Hetlors” and vice versa. I feel like I have a nuanced, reasonable, rational take on the situation. And I want to be able to communicate this nuanced take with a label.

Here are my suggestions.

Nuance Gaylor

Pro-Joe Gaylor

We Contain Multitudes Gaylor

Gaylor (Joe’s Version)

Please don’t be mad at me Gaylor

Another point: I think Taylor Swift being bisexual is the simplest explanation that allows for ALL of the things we have observed (queer flagging, kissgate, being in a relationship with a man, etc.) to be true. It requires the least amount of assumptions. It’s the Occam’s Razor of Gaylorism.

In light of the toe breakup, my label suggestions now include:

Nuance Gaylor

Bilor

I loved this visual so much I had to doodle it.