exodia that pussy, you know i obliterate

Every once in a while, I wish the friendship meter from the Sims was real so that way when people tell me "I used Chat-GPT" they can visually see just how much respect I just lost for them in that moment.

One time an acquaintance told me she entered Snape's star chart into chatgpt and I could physically feel that meter dropping three separate times over the course of her sentence

If one of my friends says something rancid I will say aloud to them "Sims minus minus" and it never fails to hit the mark.

all the rights that come with marriage you should be able to have without marriage btw. you should be able to designate a person who can visit you in the hospital regardless of your relationship to that person.

some people like to get mad at disability benefits because they think its unfair people who dont work get a payout from the government while they have to work 50 hours at the human suffering factory every week. but if you tell them "yeah that sucks i think you should also get a universal allowance and not have to work 50 hours at the human suffering factory every week" thats apparently the wrong answer.

bri'ish food is nothing special but every time i walk into the local fish n chip place i ask for a medium and they hand me a parcel of vinegar soaked fries so thick i struggle to carry it home with two hands. they look me in the eye and know theyve given me enough potato to feed me for a week. and for what. like 4 quid. you gotta respect the quantity over quality approach of it sometimes.

You’d think that once you finally get long term access to a cat and your yearning to have cat access is fulfilled that you’d become slightly less obsessed with seeing people’s cats but no if anything it gets worse

after a lifetime of hearing about aragorn but not reading the books or watching the movies, genuinely nothing could have prepared me for his actual introduction. the hobbits picked this man out of a dumpster. he is a textbook softspoken angst prince and he is covered in dirt and he probably smells so bad. he’s the coolest man alive and is so casual about it. his number one skill is Knowing Where They Are and his number two skill is Having A Horrible Destiny That Torments Him. tolkien got it in one i’m afraid aragorn son of arathorn you are the guy of all time

There’s a difference between a man who wants to fuck you and a man who wants to make you cum because you’re his. 💞

Missionary cuz her face makes me hard