Old Man Seneca

I have to hibernate for part of the winter because the snow is taller than my and my house. I get hungry, but there’s not much I can do about it! Sometimes the harvest goddess is nice and uses her magic to bring me food. But yeah. I get pretty cold if I go out in the winter. I become a spritesicle! 

Ay, that sounds rather frustrating. [rubs the back of his neck with his free hand] You know, you could always get food from my place! Mi casa es tu casa~

I mean... it’s more that I can’t leave my house. My magic to make plants grow doesn’t work in the winter, either. I love food so I don’t mind coming to your house now that it’s springtime, but I’d have to dig myself out in the winter. It’s really hard for a tiny guy like me.

That sounds really interesting! I have plenty of sequins at home. Do you want another one?

[his eyes grew wide] there are more of these shiny things? I don’t think my pockets could fit many more, but it’s so nice looking...

So how was your winter? I hate winter. So cold. No plants. But now it’s spring!!! My busiest time of year… or it would be if I could find any farms that need help…

Winter was alright. Rather cold. I hope you were okay! You must get rather cold.

I have to hibernate for part of the winter because the snow is taller than my and my house. I get hungry, but there’s not much I can do about it! Sometimes the harvest goddess is nice and uses her magic to bring me food. But yeah. I get pretty cold if I go out in the winter. I become a spritesicle! 

You can find them in the forest near my house. They’re blue! The only way to get big again is to sleep in a sprite’s bed. You’ll wake up again in your own. Or… maybe I imagined the whole thing. It sounds kind of like a dream, doesn’t it?

[blinks] Hm! Interesting~ [grins] I’ll definitely have to ask Paulo about it~

So how was your winter? I hate winter. So cold. No plants. But now it’s spring!!! My busiest time of year... or it would be if I could find any farms that need help...

No, no, he turned himself small! He ate a mushroom that I told him would make him small so that we could… [cough] never mind that part. It was Paulo! You guys wear similar shoes.

Hmm? [curious grin] Paulo? I’ll have to see if he’ll tell me, then~ I didn’t know there were mushrooms that could do that, though. Qué interesánte!

You can find them in the forest near my house. They’re blue! The only way to get big again is to sleep in a sprite’s bed. You’ll wake up again in your own. Or... maybe I imagined the whole thing. It sounds kind of like a dream, doesn’t it?

[crawls onto his hand but holds on tight] [he doesn’t like heights much] Oh! Paco! I’m sorry, I thought you were someone else. It’s nice to see you too, though!

No, no, he turned himself small! He ate a mushroom that I told him would make him small so that we could... [cough] never mind that part. It was Paulo! You guys wear similar shoes.

Ohhh. [squints] hey, lift me up so I can see you. I can’t tell people apart by their feet!

Ah– [here kneels and lowers his hand for the other to climb on] Hop aboard~

[crawls onto his hand but holds on tight] [he doesn’t like heights much] Oh! Paco! I’m sorry, I thought you were someone else. It’s nice to see you too, though!

[blinks and tilts his head slightly] Qué? Big again? Hombre pequeñito, I don’t think I was small before. 

Ohhh. [squints] hey, lift me up so I can see you. I can’t tell people apart by their feet!

[smiles] that is very pretty. The prettiest thing I own is probably this sparkle! [pulls out a sequin from his pocket] it reflects the light all nice.

Thank you! Mother worked hard on this so I take care of it lots. [puts away the handbag and looks at the tiny person] Wow! That is pretty. Where did you find it?

I found it on the ground and I cleaned it up! I looked all over for someone who might have lost it, but I never found anyone with like a pretty sequined dress or a bag that matched. So I kept it. 

[smiles] that is very pretty. The prettiest thing I own is probably this sparkle! [pulls out a sequin from his pocket] it reflects the light all nice.

don’t worry, you’re still in the “early life” part of your wikipedia page

[takes a bite of the grape, most of it still left and some juice running down his face] Ish delischious! [swallows] Thank you! Just the boost of energy I need to walk back home. It’s far from here, you know?

[ oh! he liked it! ] [ she seems relatively happy about this ] Far..? Oh– [ looks around ] How far is it, signore? I could take you there, if you’d like? [ small legs mean small steps.. is that why it’s “far”? hm ]

[points ahead of him] It’s on the other side of the pond, in the woods there. It wouldn’t be too hard if I could go through the lake, but the goddess wouldn’t like that. I don’t have the magic to teleport, either. I’m on ‘probation.’ [sighs, taking another bite of the same grape.] Oh, you would take me? That’s nice of you!

[ she smiles happily! it’s always nice to see others happy as well ~ ] Mm, nope! [ shakes her head a little ] Sadly, I didn’t grow them. But they’re from the farm I used to work on, with my brothers! [ watches him expectantly ] Hope you like it!

[takes a bite of the grape, most of it still left and some juice running down his face] Ish delischious! [swallows] Thank you! Just the boost of energy I need to walk back home. It’s far from here, you know?

the Legion are totally prescriptivists and would pronounce .gif as “jif”

However Latin lacks the letter J and Caesar would be inclined to spread Latin pronunciation as much as possible

Okay I’ve done some cursory research and have come to the conclusion that they would pronounce it “yiff”

I hate you. I’d argue they wouldn’t but Vulpes Inculta exists and would absolutely insist on this pronunciation

@gansmaltz I can’t believe how many notes this got what have you done

The Courier dual wielding Fatman launchers runnign towards a legion camp: I HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE JUSTIFIED IN MY ACTIONS IN MY ENTIRE LIFE