Passion filled tangents

I’m gonna do it! I’m gonna do the dishes!

I did it! It sucked but I did it!

I truly hate the word "unalive." There are so many other euphemisms that fictional Italian mobsters worked so hard to provide you with and you just ignore them.

"Joined the great majority" is a good one that I practically never hear.

Heard another good one in an old radio drama the other day - "He slipped out of my arms and stopped paying taxes."

‘it’s just trendy to hate on marvel’ no. marvel has done this to themselves. they overwork underpaid and non unionized vfx artists, they don’t allow actors to have access to the full scripts, they gloat about continuity but don’t have consistency, very few of the writers care even slightly about the characters or the source material, and they have gone for quantity over quality / are overproducing their product to the point of consumer exhaust. they are a multi billion dollar creative monopoly that should be held accountable

I love getting unaccompanied minors (kids flying alone) who so clearly just. Don't want to be here lol. Sometimes I get to know a little of their story, like their parents are divorced, or a family member died and they're heading to the funeral, but usually they just don't want to talk about it and that's fine. But I always treat the flight like it's a challenge to make them smile. I offer them snacks and soda but that's never enough, that's whatever, they could get those from an airport vending machine. Chump change. So then I tell the worst jokes. Just the most embarrassing, kindergarten teacher, annoying dad jokes you can think of. And those always get a groan, or a "Seriously??" And that's my in! Now I can say "Why, what's your idea of a good joke? No, come on hotshot, make your best joke, let's see it." And they hem and they haw but of course they eventually tell me their very best joke because kids are little competitive comedy goldmines. And it's always super funny, so I laugh, and that's where they slip up. Because you know what you almost always do when your joke successfully makes someone laugh? You smile. And I'm like. Gotcha. Rookie move. Now you're going to end up having a good time in spite of yourself. I win.

Did this with an 11yo u.m. today and he said "What did the ghost say to the other ghost?" And I said "What?" "Nothing. Ghosts aren't real."

I really love the small change from “a well” to “her well”

she’s been down there for a year, it’s her damn well

Lawyer who is like visibly trying not to cry and teary-eyed and snifflign and drawing shaky breaths and hands trembling and constantly wiping his nose on his sleeves but he’s winning the case