She Walks in Beauty

I fully understand that it's considered rude to sanitize your hands after shaking hands with a group of people, and I just want everyone to know: I'm not doing it because I think you're disgusting and I want to get your internet stank off of me; I'm doing it because I know the statistics about cis men washing their hands.

I'm a strong, capable adult. If I wanted to touch fifty dicks in a single afternoon, I'd do it myself. I don't need your hand outs.

holy shit does this one land differently in the 2020 coronavirus pandemic hellscape

You missed the best part. They weren’t even their sheep. This good pupper gathered up a bunch of random sheep it found somewhere on the countryside and brought them home for its human.

*whispers* the countryside is full of free sheep