you’re an unwritten melody

i just can't stop thinking abt that post. i looked for it but i haven't seen it again, if anyone else finds it plz link it or send it to me, i wanna credit the op (edit: POST HAS BEEN FOUND! og post was by @finnthephrog and it was linked to me by @ohitsthatguy. i did misremember it slightly but its fine ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)

anyway. i keep thinking abt a scenario where they're constantly fighting/arguing, everyone's upset just all the time, and eventually it all culminates with their worst (and final) argument ending when grace screams "I JUST WANTED TO LIVE!"

and simon fucking freezes.

grace is crying. "i just wanted to live. what's so wrong about that?"

yeah. i think we get a pretty clear idea of the psychological impact it had in the final scene, when rocky informs grace that the hail mary is equipped to return to earth, and all he has to do is say the word. the way grace's body language and expression convey visible relief when he realises that rocky isn't telling him to leave, but asking him to stay. while i don't think the revelation was immediate, i'm certain that grace felt nothing short of saved by the realisation that he wouldn't be able to return to earth. that he had not only the choice but the desire to turn back for rocky. because everyone on earth is, in a way, complicit in grace's violation, through either ignorance or - as carl demonstrates - inaction. stratt made the call to sedate him, but it took multiple people working with her to catch him and pin him down and force him onto that one-way trip. how many other people on earth would have done the same in their shoes, if it meant the best possible chance of saving the world? if it meant that at least it didn't have to be them, or those they love? to return would mean living with the burden of that, either internalising it to avoid tainting the world's pride and joy in the success of the mission and dying with it as a shameful secret, or being subjected to endless relitigation and spectacle. going "home" was never an option from the moment he was recruited.

Was inspired by the wonderful post by @hailed-marys so me and @sam-i-am-27 got possessed by the demons and came out with this.

HC list under the cut